DAZED

Chapter 3: Jade

It was yet another bustling day, the same as yesterday or the day before. I've disliked the busy people and the atmosphere since I've moved to the city for college, senseless and unplanned. My mother pushed me through it, saying that going to college brings good employment opportunities. She may be right and even if I refused to go, I'll be forced to.

It's been long, knowing how big the city is, I have avoided going, refusing to go visit my sister or to go away there on vacation or holidays. Mother have come to notice that but somehow, didn't ask any questions. Since I moved, I've always wondered if we'll bump into each other by chance, yet, it never did.

As time went by, my fears of that coming begin to dissipate. Even avoiding the places we've been, thinking, what if I'll see her there, smiling and waving at me like a ghost that have come to haunt me.

I sighed and looked over the setting sun, the orange that colored the white clouds.

'How beautiful'

"Ms. Jackson... Ms. Jackson?", the instructor called, interrupting my thoughts and my sight away from the disappearing sun.

"Yes?", I responded, raising my hand for him to see.

"You are Ms. Jackson?", he asked once again, unsure.

"Yes, yes, I am sir", I replied, I did start to get annoyed by his questionable look, yet, I couldn't blame him since I've never been social and had been uncooperative throughout the semester.

"Congratulations, you are on the third rank for today's semester. The second and first rank goes to students from class 2-B and 2-D", he claimed smiling. Everyone in class cheered, I can't even guess if they know me at all. I can't seem to understand what's in there to announce or cheer about a rank if at the end of the day, you were just another struggling student, simply trying.

The girl next to me suddenly came closer and whispered her congratulations like it was a big deal, I've never actually asked her name nor do I have the intention of asking. Maybe, she mentioned it one time and I forgot and can't recall. She's been pestering me since the first week I stepped into that class, like a leech that's not easy to get rid of; sitting next to me and starting a conversation and not realizing how I hated it every time she opens her mouth. I hate that about myself, I know that she's just being friendly and extroverted but I can't seem to stop myself from being annoyed whenever she's around.

"Hmm", I responded while waiting for her to stand and move along.

"Uhhhm, me and some friends are going out tonight for drinks and I really want to invite you, if you're not doing something later?", she asked, still seated when almost everyone upfront already exited.

'What's with this unrelenting girl?!'

"I'm booked", I replied bluntly, looking directly at her hazel eyes. That pair of eyes looked beautiful, I can't deny that. Sparkling they seemed when they met mine.

"Well, that's... n-next time then", she stuttered, stood up and swiftly walked away.

'What was that?'

'Hazel huh? God I miss her golden blue eyes'

"Alex... Alexis", I whispered to myself before finally exiting the empty room.

Two years passed since we let each other go, yet, I can't seem to get her off my mind, every second of everyday. I've done everything, took up some part-time jobs during my free time to keep my mind off things, read and binge watch, still, at the end of the day before my slumber, I think of her. In my dreams, I see her and in the morning I wake up, I long for her. It was an endless cycle. It felt exhausting but I can't seem to stop myself.