Sink or Swim - Luca x Alberto

The Sickness No Doctor Can Cure

Alberto's POV

I reach down and grab a random pebble by my feet, throwing it in the ocean.

Then I continue walking in circles. Pacing, I guess. I don't know.

My feet are starting to hurt from these rocks. But I barely even notice it. I'm barely noticing much of anything.

I run my palms down my face and groan, not even bothering to be quiet since there's never anyone out here at this hour.

I grab another pebble, toss it, and watch it plop into the water instead of skip over it first. I roll my eyes, grab a flatter pebble this time, and try again. But it still acts dumb and falls right in the water.

I force my attention away from that and press my hands against the sides of my head, shutting my eyes and continuing to walk in circles.

'Idiot, idiot, IDIOT.'

Yeah, there's no doubt that I am.

What was I thinking?!

I don't even know how it happened. I guess I got too confident. After what happened at the bookstore, I thought that maybe I could show the same affection without it seeming weird. I saw all those opportunities, and I just took them without thinking twice.

But what is making my heart pound the most is what happened at the festival. Well, actually, the several things that happened at the festival: dancing with him, touching his nose with mine... not to mention that whole hand-holding thing that he started himself.

I've been pacing at the shore—the one hidden behind our house—for over an hour now. Nothing makes sense. Everything is going through my head at once.

Frustrated, I grab a handful of pebbles and throw them out into the ocean. Then I turn away and hold my hands up against my forehead, pushing my hair back.

"Do you want them to find out? Is that it, Alberto?" I ask myself.

I grab another rock, but this time I have to pick it up with both hands because it's bigger. I hold it behind my shoulder, then toss it with all my strength, yelling out at the same time.

It lands in the water, but not very far—just enough to leave half of it underwater. The hard landing makes the water splash back at me.

I'd used my hands to protect my face from the splash. When I move my hands back down, I turn them over, eyeing the purple scales that formed.

I sigh.

Last year around this time, I did one of the riskiest things ever: I went with Luca to a human town that hated sea monsters. To them, they were considered freaks. And for a very short moment during the race, we were freaks.

But whatever. I mean, I was definitely scared of being hit by a spear or something, but I couldn't have cared less if someone saw me as a freak.

I guess it was because I didn't have much to lose.

I watch the scales disappear, then raise my fist to my chest and look down.

If things were still the same as last year, I wouldn't be so ashamed of being sick.

But now I have a family. Now I have Luca.

And after I found out that I was sick, I was determined to keep it a secret as long as I lived, because I can't lose the things I love the most. I didn't care if being sick had made me happy before. I had something special already, and revealing this secret would tear it all away from me.