The Story Of Ryan

Alive

Ryan

My heart was beating rapidly. Thump, thump, thump. My lips curving downward at the ache that was surfacing through my chest. All I could think was her name and my mouth opened in agony. The pain that was excruciating it made my whole body recoil into a fetal position.

Emery, I heard myself whisper.

The floor was so cold and my body was shivering. I was suffering slowly and I wished that the pain would go away. It was as if I was fighting for one last breathe. One last touch. One last kiss. Just to hold my Emery.

I am so sorry, I managed to say quickly before a figure before me, the figure that would always haunt my existence, made everything turn black.

My eyes flew open and directly met the half moon up above. My body was drenched with sweat  and my hands were clawing at the dirt underneath me. Why the hell am I here? I turned my head to the side and there was nothing that met my eyes besides trees. Why was I in the forest? I controlled my breathing, but there was something off. Something was way off.

I stood and was met with a cold wind. 

Where the fuck were my clothes?

**

My eye sight was perfect. I did not need my glasses which was entirely strange. I wore glasses my entire life. My green eyes shined weirdly and I couldn't help but remember the pain from the dream as I stared at myself. There were so many questions that were circling in my head and I was beginning to have a migraine. I touched my bare chest and saw a weird symbol that I had not seen before. My freckles were forming something that I could not really pin point. What was happening to me?

I grabbed my green jacket that she loved so much. Truly, I would wear this jacket every day if it meant she would fall in love with me. A smirk grew on my face, something like confidence burst through me, I felt alive. I felt so fucking alive.

**

Her fingers slowly brushed my hair and I closed my eyes loving the feel of it. The hesitant look on her face was long gone after I had brushed my lips slowly against hers. Somehow that gave her the courage to run her hands over me. The exciting feeling rushed throughout my body. Our bodies were connected-though, I wish it were skin to skin. How frightened I was when that thought crossed my mind, but it was a natural thing. 

And of course, I would love to be with Emery. All of Emmie.

I looked down at her and she had a smile that made my heart skip. The wind picked up and her perfume swirled around my nose. It was so intoxicating that I buried my nose on the crook of her neck. I do not know if I was hurting her, basically because all my weight was on top of her, but I could not help myself as I lost control. Something inside me pleaded to have my way with her.

Something was going on with me, and before I can stop myself..

My lips crashed to hers, my body was purring with excitement as she kissed me feverishly back. Her lips tasted just like the skittles she had before things led to this. 

"Ryan, " she whispered, as my tongue swiped along the side of her neck. Her saying my name made things inside me come alive.

"Ryan. We have to stop." Oh, please no. My nose skimmed her jaw. I was trying to control myself, but there were feelings inside me that scared the living hell out of me.

1. Rejection, something I was use to.

2. How I just wanted to rip her clothes off because she was mine.

Mine.

A voice in my head said.

I sat up straight, not caring if I had hurt Emery in the process. 

Listen.

I covered my ears and shut my eyes tightly. I did not understand! Was I going crazy?! I do not know what was happening, but I was fighting against it and I know for sure it did not like it. A growl inside my head roared and I could feel my insides become frustrated. Before I knew it, I was throwing up. I could feel a palm on my back and her voice cooing next to me.

It soothed me to no end. The pain was aching less and my vomiting had slowed. I was now heaving nothing but saliva and I just wanted it all to end.

"Ryan, are you okay?" Her angelic voice sang in my ears. Whatever was happening, whoever was in my head, loved the sound of her voice. I looked at her beautiful face and saw that her eyes were widened with fright.

"Your eyes. They are really dark. Ryan, are you okay?"

I nodded.

"I never felt any better." And it was the truth. The pain has seized and all that was built up now was happiness. I bit my lip with frustration. Damn it.

"What's wrong?" She knelt before me and stared at me directly in the eyes.

"I really want to kiss you." I chuckled.

"Then why don't you?" A blush rising to her beautiful face. I raised an eyebrow and looked at the ground beside me.

"R-right, ha ha, I forgot." She bit her lip and a growl roared in my head. This time, it did not frighten me because I know just how he felt.

"God damn, would you stop with that."I gently pulled her lip gently out her mouth and rubbed it softly with my thumb. I really wanted to kiss those lips. A frown plastered on my face at the thought that I couldn't right now.

Her face came closer and her cheek brushed softly against mine as she lowered her head towards my neck. She placed a small kiss on the crook of it and although it was not my lips, it felt somehow just the same. It gave me the same exhilarating feeling as if her lips were kissing mine.

It made me feel alive.

 A/N: Sorry it took so long. i am sure you guys are already assuming what is happening, and I don't know lol i did not want be straightforward with this thought and put it in the beginning. i wanted it to be a surprise, I guess. Anyways, I hope you enjoyed it..Hopefully :)