Is this the final stop? (Toni Shalifoe)

Chapter 52

tw: depictions of violence and injury a little later in the chapter

Shelby yanks the door open to the high school and slams right into Dot. Too flustered to talk and too embarrassed by her tears streaming down her face, she pushes off of Dot and keeps walking. She shakes her head thinking about Toni's blatant and even cruel rejection in the parking lot. She knows Toni's lashing out because of Dave and all he does to spite her, but it doesn't make the heartbreak of hearing such anger directed at her hurt any less.

Shelby's too deep in regret to see anything else. She replays all the times she's hurt Toni, how everything she's tried to do wasn't enough to make it up to her. How Toni is reminded at every turn that Dave doesn't want her there. And the worst part, how she endlessly trusts Dave to be a better man. She shakes her head against the thought, she can no longer blindly assume the best in him.

The exact opposite of what Toni thinks of her.

Dot follows her down the hallway, "I don't know what shit went down between you two—"

Shelby spins back and yells out, "I fucked everythin' up! Okay, Dottie? Is that what you want to hear?"

Dot freezes, shocked by Shelby swearing, and seeing her in this state. She looks away from Shelby, sad for her, "No. Because y'all look miserable."

Shelby puts her hands in her face, "I just—I broke her trust, and I'm not sure it's somethin' I can get back. I really messed up, Dottie."

"Well, I don't know what happened because neither of you are talking about it, rather just stomping around like little toddlers. But maybe? You should talk to her?"

"I'm the last person she wants to talk to right now. My Daddy is usin' every opportunity he has to ruin her life and I can't do anythin' about it. I didn't do anythin' about it." She slams one of the open classroom doors to dispel the anger pent up in her body.

Dot furrows her eyebrows with all this new information, not quite understanding it, but feeling empathetic. She offers, "Seems like she's pretty shaken up, too."

Shelby shakes her head with her eyes closed, "Scared? No, Dot. She's angry. And has every right to be."

Dot waves a hand off, dismissing her, "Well, she wasn't. Not two minutes ago when she was running out to you."

Shelby scoffs, "Yeah, just to say, 'Get the fuck away from me.' Toni's made up her mind." She keeps walking away, wanting her feet to move her away from all this pain she's caused.

But Dot stays there, "Huh."

Shelby turns back, slightly disappointed to see Dot wasn't following after her, she walks back. She crosses her arms, "What?"

Dot runs a hand through her hair, "It just doesn't make sense. She was, like, scared. Said something about, 'How does she know him?'"

"What?"

Dot shrugs and continues, "She got all squirrely, bouncing on the balls of her feet—"

"No. What did she say about him?" Shelby's voice is steady and serious.

"You know him?" Dot pops a chip in her mouth.

"How does she know him?" Shelby asks herself, trying to put it all together. She starts talking fast, not necessarily in Dot's direction, but she's laying it all out, "He's just a new parishioner at the church, I saw him holdin' a brochure of the school. But she just—"

The lightbulb goes off. And now everything feels like it's moving in slow motion. Her trembling hand covers her mouth, "It's her old foster father." Her eyes are widening as she makes the realization, as her mind conjures up every memory of Toni talking about him, and soon enough, her imagination is picturing every worst possible scenario. Her eyes turn up to the clock, "How long has it been?!"