The love pentagon

Chapter 18

I woke up in a hospital bed. All i had on was a night gown, and was totally naked underneathe. Before looking around, i took a deep breathe. I was relieved to still be alive. As i tried to sit up, i felt a sharp pain in my leg. I pulled up my nightgown. On my leg was some thick white gauze. That mustve been where i stabbed my leg with the knife. That reminded me of everything i did. All the guilt flooded my mind. I hated every part of myself for what i did. How could i do that to all those people, hoe could i let just anyone come along and fuck me. I slapped my hands against my face, and felt warm tears rush out of my eyes. I pulled myself off the bed, groaning in pain. I held onto the wall, as i made my way to the bathroom. I looked like hell. My hair stucking out every where, the black strands stuck to my face, which was dripping with tears and sweat. I had black mascara and eye liner smeared down my whole face. I hadnt eaten in so long, that my collarbones jutted out. I pulled up my shirt. You could see my ribs sticking out too. How long had it been? I crawled back over to the bed, and pulled myself up so i could sit on the side. I was already gasping for breathe. "Woah, you shouldnt be getting up." A nurse warned as she walked in. "How long was i out." I mumbled groggily. "A couple weeks. Im just glad you woke out of your coma." She said with a sigh. "Coma?!" I gasped. "Yeah.. Here you need to eat something." She handed me a tray with some hospital food. Some rice and chicken, with a container of apple sauce and some water. I quickly ate up the entire tray of food. I had been starving. Then i felt my stomach drop. Before i could make it to the bathroom, all the food came up, and was heaved onto the floor. I continued to cough up more for a few minutes before flopping on my back on the bed. The nurse came and cleaned it all up, so i thanked her, and then i was all alone again. I was disgusted with myself. I needed a shower. I cralwed over to the bathroom, and started a hot shower. I climbed in. I traced my hands over my bony, weak body, and felt the hot water sting all my cuts and bruises. I closed me eyes and enjoyed the moment. I opened my eyes. Blood sprayed out of the shower head. It was hot and thick. I screeched as loud as possible, and fell to the ground. I continued to scream and wail. I shook my head violently and cried. I took my hands off my eyes. Normal clear shower water. It wasnt real. I tried to pull myself up, but winced in pain. I started to cry again. "Someone help me" I whined to the empty bathroom. Then the water stopped and someone pulled open the curtain. I expected it to be a nurse but it wasnt. I recognised that deep voice. "Im not looking, heres a towel." Dean said as he handed me a fluffy white one. I wrapped it around myself. "You can turn around now. And thank you." I said. He turned around and held out his hand. I took it, and he pulled me up into his arms. "Dean.. I-I dont know what to say. I cant explain how bad i feel for everything i did. I love all you guys, and i screwed up really bad. Its okay if..if you dont forgive me.." I said to Dean. Dean sighed. He helped me over to the hospital bed, and sat down next to me. "Cierra, i forgive you. That wasnt you. I understand. If anyone understands its me." He pulled up his sleeve. There was a red symbol in his skin. "This is the mark of Cain. I was dieing and it brought me back to life..but as a demon. I did so many things i regret, and im still trying to get past it. I guess we all have some demon in us. Some more than others." He explained to me. I started crying because of how supporive he was. He pulled me into a hug, with his strong warm arms wrapped around me. We just held on to eachother for what seemed like forever.