alexithymia | l. hyunjae

¹

2022

The lift dinged.

Yoon walked out then was immediately greeted by her fellow coworkers. Almost everyone who passed by, welcomed her presence with a simple 'Good morning'. Yoon tried her best to give them a small smile eventhough it was kinda awkward for her.

Being an architect in the company for almost 2 years and yet she had never gotten herself some close friends. Well, everyone in the company were aware about it.

Yoon was infamously known for being solitary and secluded from the crowd. She never talked to her coworkers aside from project discussions or anything unrelated to her work. Hence, no one had a courage to befriend her.

Except for Kim Mingyu.

In contrast from Yoon, Mingyu was a friendly guy. Almost everyone in the building were friends with him. He was that type of guy who would always randomly treats people with coffee in the morning, making people laugh at his lame jokes, lowkey flirting with female interns and even sometimes spending his lunch break just to gossip with the janitor.

Eventhough he was everyone's guy, people still can't believe the fact that he befriended the Ha Yoon. It was sort of mystery of how he could persuade Yoon to talk to him aside from work stuffs.

and nobody else knew about it except from the two.

Quite ridiculous actually like how Yoon's social life became a talk. To her, there was nothing special about it. Lame and boring.

Sitting in her office room, Yoon took a quick glance to her daily schedules before rearranged her sketches neatly on the shelf.

Knock, knock

Yoon averted her attention to the door, just then someone's head popped out from outside with his stupid grins.

"What do you want, Mingyu?"

"Damn, why so serious. It's 9 in the morning. How many times I should remind you not to start your day with that face?" He finally came out from behind the door and made his way to her table, putting a cup of hot Americano.

"This kind of face? What face?" Yoon grabbed the cup and carefully sipping it, trying not to left her white shirt with coffee stains.

"The frown. Seriously you will look older than your age, you know?" He sighed, taking a sit on a chair in front of her.

"I'm not frowning"

"Yes you are"

"Seriously, are you trying to pick a fight with me? I'm not frowning. This is my normal face. You're just too used for being everyone's sunshine." Yoon rolled her eyes.

"And what's wrong with that?" Yoon just ignored him and continued to do her work.

Mingyu sighed. Again.

"Yoon, I know it's difficult to force yourself being friendly or smiley but you like it or not, it's related to your work." Mingyu leaned forward, placing his folded hands on her table.

"You're an architect. You deal with people almost everyday. Do you really meet with your clients like this?" He asked.

Yoon looked up to face him and was about to answer before Mingyu put his hand in front of her face.

"Don't give me excuses like 'I'm trying to be professional'. What do you understand about profesionalisme? Being professional is not about blank face or serious tone, you can be professional with a smile. In that way, your clients will be much comfortable around you."

"So my clients are not comfortable with me. That's your point?" Yoon put down her pen and glared at him.

Mingyu gulped.

"You're missing the main point here, Yoon."

"No, I get it. Totally understand. I appreciate your efforts just now Mr. Kim so can you please quietly drag yourself out of my room. I have works to do." Yoon pointed her hand to the door. "And I'm pretty much sure that you also have your own works to do. You don't want to make your beloved clients to wait longer, right?"

Mingyu gave her a look. This is so much harder than I thought. To be a friend of Ha Yoon did require him an extra effort and it was worth it. Yet, he needed more efforts to change her mindset.

Please don't think it wrong. Mingyu loved Yoon just the way she was. He just didn't want Yoon to keep avoiding people from her life. He knew that Yoon didn't want it either.

Giving his best friend one final smile, he stood up and made his way out from the room.

"Yoon" He called her.

Yoon didn't gave him a replied yet he continued, "Always remember that I care so much for you. I want nothing but the best. So, if you have some extra time, please rethink about my words just now, okay? See you at lunch!"

The door closed.

Yoon looked up and stared at door. She sighed and leaned her body back on her chair. Yoon closed her eyes and without asking, Mingyu's words reappeared in her brain like a spell.

She groaned. It wasn't like she never had a thought about it, it was just... she had something that forced her back from changing. Some reasons.

She was aware of Mingyu's attention. He was a nice friend. Although their friendship wasn't like everyone's type of friendship but it was something that Yoon had finally experienced after a long time.

She didn't hate or disgust to make friends with people, she was afraid.

A piece from her past memories restricted her brain from accepting new people around her. She was afraid of betrayal. The word "friend" could make her rolled her eyes annoyingly. She was pissed.

Her thought was distracted by a sudden phonecall from her phone. "Hello? This is Ha Yoon speaking."

Yoon nodded her head while writing something on a blank memo. As the call ended, she packed her things and started to begin her work as usual.

♡