𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐛𝐢𝐫𝐝

40

valentina

I don't know where I am.

I'm sat on a ledge with my legs dangling off the side. I feel like I'm watching myself from afar.

My head is spinning a little but not enough do disorientate me, I smile and I don't know why.

Someone comes behind me, wrapping their strong arms around my stomach, pulling me back a little towards their warm chest.

I want to feel panicked but I don't, for some weird reason I completely relax at their touch. My mind screams stranger but my body thinks different.

My breath hitches when their lips meet my neck and I instinctively tilt my head, allowing them to have more room.

"So responsive when you're high." A low husky voice teases in my ear when I arch my back.

"Mm, shut up." I'm suddenly lifted up by two big hands on my waist and placed down onto the floor in front of a black tee covered chest.

My eyes don't waver from their toned chest as they start talking to me but I can't hear their voice, it's muted.

Who are you?

And why do I feel so safe around you?

-

I awaken from my dream with a foggy head. My mind swirling with answered questions. It felt so real, almost as if it was a memory. If so who the hell was he?

Sighing, I stare up at the dark ceiling above me. I fell asleep pretty quickly last night, having had an emotional day coupled with a late dinner, I was knocked out.

I turn over, tapping my phone to find out it's three am. I must not have been asleep for long as I thought I was.

Climbing slowly out of bed, I grab my phone and make my way downstairs, through the dimly lit house.

When I reach the doorway of the kitchen I come face to face with a toned chest covered in a black tee. I stumble back, deja vu hitting me like a fucking truck.

I'm rooted to the spot for a second, everything but my mind going silent. I might be half asleep but I know what I saw and I know what I'm seeing.

The moment passes and the bubble pops, my hearing returning.

"Vee, are you okay?" Matteo's grumbly voice reaches my ears and I let out a jagged breath.

"Yeah, sorry you scared me." I rasp out and cringe at the sound of my half asleep voice.   

"Ah," he says, sounding unconvinced, "Goodnight amore." My stomach flutters at the nickname and he passes, the sound of his steps retreating.

I try my best to shake off the 'off' feeling and continue into the kitchen, only to find someone else in here.

Can a woman just get some water in peace?

"Alessandro." I acknowledge as I reach for a glass.

"Valentina." He returns with a smile before going back to drinking his wine and scrolling on his phone.

Filling up my water, I make a move to leave but he stops me.

"Can I talk to you for a second?" I falter, what does he want to talk about?

"Yeah sure." Taking a sip of my water, I lean on the counter in front of him and he sits on one of the barstools, in comfortable normal people clothes that still look really fucking expensive.

"How are you?" What? "You seemed quite distant at dinner, I just wanted to make sure that you were okay. I know it must be hard to be in a new place with new people." His words hold so much, care and concern, it's almost father like.

"Oh, me? I'm fine just missing home a little." I give him a weak smile, taking another sip to soothe my dry mouth.

"What do you miss about New York?" Again, why does it actually sound like he wants to know rather than if he was making idle conversation?

"The familiarity I guess. I know every corner of my old neighbourhood and every part of my new one." Alessandro hums at my response.

"Did you grow up there?" I take a deep breath.

"Yeah, born and raised. Never left the state until now, let alone the country." I cringe at my use of the word 'raised' cause that would mean that someone had raised me other than myself, which I know is not the case.

"Do you have any family back home?" He was obviously not present in the briefing I know that Imara would have made sure to give.

"Uh, I don't- I'm an orphan." I struggle to say, I am too tired for this.

Something unreadable flashes across his face.

"And if you don't mind me asking how old you are?" He rushes out quickly and study him closely. He looks as if he's about to jump out of his chair.

"I turned twenty one this year." His brown eyes grow wider yet his face doesn't give away a thing.

"Birthday?"

I shake my head. "I wasn't sure so I chose 5th of February. I only know the year and that's only roughly."

Alessandro's grip on his glass tighten so much that I fear he's going to break the it. A few moments pass before he goes slack, placing the glass back down at his forearms on the counter in front him, running his hands through his hair.

"I'm sorry for the interrogation. You just remind me so much of her." My breath hitches and I freeze.

I what?

Silence hangs heavy in the air between us.

"My daughter, Valentina. I only had her for twelve months before she was taken from me." His voice holds so much pain and sadness and mourning for the loss of his daughter.

"She was my second little girl. Spitting image of me and her mother. She was so good, she never used to cry and she slept through the night every night without fail." Alessandro's voice cracks and he takes a deep shaky breath before continuing.

"It's hard to convince myself that she's gone forever. I don't think I'll ever stop looking for her in everyone I meet. The day I had to bury her was the worst day of my life, you aren't supposed to outlive your children, not by so much. They didn't even let us see her body, they said that it would upset us too much and that it wouldn't be worth it. I wish everyday that I got to see her one last time, even if it ruined my perception of her forever."

I push myself off the counter, and walk over on shaky legs to the sobbing man. He lifts his head out of his hands and turns to look at me. Wrapping my arms around him, he pulls me into a hug. He smells like alcohol, cigars and tears, it's weirdly comforting.

I'm not very good at consoling people when they're upset but I try my best.

Alessandro pulls back after a while and looks at me through teared eyes. "You're a very strong woman Valentina, I can see it in you're eyes how much you've been through. If my daughter ever got to grow up, I wish that she'd grow up to be as strong as you." Now I'm crying.

Daddy issues really hitting hard right now.

"You don't know how much that means to hear. Thank you." I reply, wiping my eyes to stop more tears from falling down.

"And thank you, for listening."

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i feel really bad for alessandro, i'm the one making him feel like that

i was sad writing this but i'm pretty happy with how it turned out

i watched through my window on netflix today and whew, the guy is hot and the girl is hot

not the worst film ever but it is dubbed and there is a lot of spanish texting

unedited 

<3