To die a warrior...

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Trigger Warning:
Strong language and themes of depression.

*****

"Grumpy! Become my daughter!"

Alex stood there stunned, for split second she didn't even understand what he had said.

What?

Then cold hard panic set in, Alexandra's breath hitched in blind mortified terror. Her eye grew wide, she could feel fear taking over as her brain registered his words.

He knows? How!? HOW DOES HE KNOW!? WHO TOLD HIM!?

Papi? Did papi meet him and tell him!? No, when would he have? The mortified child had always been with papi, not once had he ever mentioned meeting him.

Then maybe mother!? That was possible, it's not like she had seen her in like 11 years, who knows, maybe she had met him?
And told him! WHY WOULD SHE TELL HIM!? HE WAS- Wait, didn't he say 'become my daughter' not 'you are my daughter'... Then the Yonko didn't know... then why would he say something like that?

Is this some kind of sick joke?

She felt sick, so much so that Alex could have thrown up, that was if there was anything in her stomach to actually bring up

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She felt sick, so much so that Alex could have thrown up, that was if there was anything in her stomach to actually bring up. She was shaking violently, the dark bag under her red raw and dry eye was only making her head hurt more, the pressure was so very uncomfortable and suddenly the day caught up, it crushed her in a rush of emotional agony.

She felt frozen stiff, she was hungry, she was tired and she was thirsty. Alex's chest was painful, her breathing wasn't so good, which was probably because she hadn't taken her medication today. Everything else that was happening, seemed so much more important at the time. Not to mention the girl didn't want to look weak and pathetic to the imposing and terrifying pirates.

More then anything she wanted to break down in tears. Alex had reached her limit.

I don't want to deal with this anymore. I can't deal with it. Just go away! Why can't this go away! Please leave me alone!

Alex wanted to go home... she wanted her papi. With teeth bared and trembling lips, fingers that dug into the cold rock beneath her, that made her wince in pain, as her frozen pale skin was turning almost white. She felt like a ghost, something that didn't belong. That felt empty, like something was missing but couldn't do anything to stop that agonising reality.

Her trembling hand finding it's way up to her missing eye. She couldn't even feel it under her touch having gone numb a long time ago.

Why did this have to happen? Wasn't losing everything enough! Now this! What did we do to deserve this! Papi didn't deserve this! He was- is a good man, he cared about me and he had to go away too! Is it me?

Alex was slowly starting to break down, her face starting to turn onto a blank empty stare, looking haunted. As if the young girl was seeing it all play out before her, but she was detached, so desperate to get away from the emotional turmoil that she had just up and left her body. But of course, that was not the case, Alex could not escape so easily. She was trapped in her own head, the shadows she wished didn't exist were all too present.

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