Chapter 30

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I walked into the library and the first thing I saw was that the couch where Will usually sat was empty. I decided to place the stuff on the coffee table by it, and I rubbed my hands on my jeans as I looked around. This library was so big, there were literally thousands of books here and it had been one of my favourite spots in the world before the war. I looked at the table and I saw that he was currently reading history books again, my little nerd.

I walked past some aisles that were here, trying to find William, and after a while I saw him standing on a ladder looking through some books. He didn't see me though, as his back was facing me. He had that cute frustrated look on his face and I just had this feeling that I knew which book he was looking for.

"It's one lower and to the right" I said very carefully and William froze and his whole demeanour changed. He turned his head to look at me. "The reign of Hitler, all of Hitlers books is one shelf lower." I said carefully and his green eyes met mine and there were some tears in them. He gave me a short nod as he climbed down the ladder for a bit before he saw all the Hitler books and a small smile appeared on his face as he traced the back of the books and he then grabbed one of them. He then climbed down the ladder and he looked at me a bit uncertain.

"You changed your hair." He commented and I looked down at it for a second with an amused look on my face as I grabbed the weave that was here.

"The dark red was for dramatics during the summit I barely attended." I said calmly and I looked back up. "I like my old hair colour better, so I decided to get a straight dark blonde weave." I explained and he stared at me for a second.

"It looks good. You look good. Are you good?" He asked very carefully. "Hugo and Trevor aren't-."

"I know. Simon told me." I said right away. "Thank you by the way." I said as I looked at the shelves that were next to me and read some of the book titles. "I'm ok, I guess. I brought sushi and red wine, I thought you'd like that." I said carefully looking sideways at him now.

"I'd like that." He said and I nodded again. God, this was so uncomfortable. It was like we were having our first date again, but this time both of us had our walls up. "How did you know I wanted a book about Hitler?"

"I saw the books of Stalin, Mussolini." I said casually as I then grabbed the ladder and moved it slightly sideways. "Figured you were studying some authoritarian leaders. Speaking of which." I said as I climbed up the ladder. "My dad." I said carefully as I looked through some of the titles that were here, hoping it was here. "He was immensely interested in Castro, had about 100 books about him and I read one of them that I thought, no I knew, you'd love." I said calmly as I then saw it and the biggest smile appeared on my face as I grabbed it and held it down and William grabbed it. "It discusses the socio-economic policies that Castro implemented. It's an immensely interesting read and also has pictures and I know how much you love seeing pictures of things." I said calmly and I then climbed a bit higher as they had about 300 books about Castro alone and I smiled at that. "Oe and this one is good too." I said and I looked sideways and down and William was staring at me with a huge smile on his face, with a slight glistering in his eyes. "Have you read them?"

"The one you're grabbing right now, I have. This one I haven't." He said and I nodded as I climbed down carefully.

"Gathering inspiration or?" I asked carefully and he looked down at the book and then back at me and a huge smile appeared on his face.

"This is amateur hour compared to Locatlie, love." He said tapping me on my bum with the book while passing me and I turned around to look at him as he had the cutest smile ever on his face.

"I know it is." I confirmed. "Sushi?" I asked and he nodded as I then turned around and looked at all the history books that were here with interest.

"How much of these have you read?" William asked.

"Not enough." I said calmly as I then saw one about the Syrian war and I grabbed it and I then also grabbed another book before we arrived back at the couch and I sat down. "Are these any good?"

"That one is." William stated. "At least Hugo has been talking about that book for ages now." He said as he went and sat down in his own corner of the couch. I opened up the box of sushi and I pulled the table closer to me.

"Do you mind if we just sit here and read?" I asked carefully looking at him as I grabbed the chopsticks.

"No that's fine." He said with a small smile. "I'd love that." He said and I nodded as I ate. I opened up the book and I started to read. I could feel him staring at me every now and then and I looked back up at him, but we kept missing one another. After a while I stood up and I turned around and I laid on my back, my head on his lap. I saw a small smile appear on his fave and that made me smile too. I pulled up my knees and I put the book against the top of my knees os that I could read. Williams hand rested on my knee and he made some shapes on them, but I didn't mind that; I had missed this.

"Will?" I asked as I read something that I didn't understand.

"Yes?" He said absently minded.

"Whats this?" I asked as I showed him a word I didn't understand. He then spend the next half hour talking about it; as it was an event and I looked at him as he told it while still reading his own book. The biggest smile appeared on my face throughout him talking, as he talked with immense passion while also being able to read. He was perfect. I let out a deep sigh after about half an hour.

"Too long?"

"Not long enough." I said as I laid on my side now, facing him, and I put my arm around his waist and I pulled up my knees as I placed my book against it.

"I missed you too." He whispered softly and I smiled at that a bit as he held the book in his other hand now as he started massaging my head. "What can I do to make it easier?" He asked after a while and I let out a small breath.

"Just sit here." I replied back. "Let me get used to you again." I added. "Be there for me." I added. "I'm being something that I hate; immensely selfish. I need to be able to have you at all times." I said calmly as I closed the book and I put my other arm around him and held onto him tightly. "I need to remember."

"Remember what?"

"That I'm loved." I whispered as I buried my head in his stomach. "That I deserve to be loved. That you love me. That I'm enough." I added carefully and he took a deep breath and I could hear emotion.

"Do you need me to tell you why and what or?"

"Not right now. Now I just want to enjoy finally being with you." I said with sadness as I felt tears appear. "I've missed this so much." I said and I then broke slightly and I started to cry. He put the hand that was on my knee on my waist now, and the other from my head to my back and he put his head down. "I missed you so much." I said through my tears.

"I've missed you too Love. Forever and always." 


A.N.

So, Will and Jules are back to cuddling and semi talking. I'll post another chapter tonight! I hope everyone is still enjoying the story :)

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