Just Tell Me You Love Me (Book 1 in the Just Series) *under editing*

Chapter 32

Massimo

"I never thought I'd see you this happy again. In fact, I haven't seen you this happy, son," my father said.

"She's amazing. I'm lucky to have her," I said.

"That you are son. Not everyone is lucky enough to be given a second chance. Don't waste it son. Cherish her," my father said.

I've been hearing that quite a lot lately. From everyone, quite frankly. Everyone has been telling me how happy I look; how lucky I am; and what a gem Arabella is; and how I should cherish her; treasure her. I mean, I get it she really is amazing, but sometimes I feel like they think I'm going to hurt her or break her or something. I care about her enough, to marry her, and to know how special she is.

But I have to say, I can't help but feel guilty, every time I hear people say, that they have never seen me this happy. Hell, what would Cassie think? How would she feel if she hears that?

Hell, what am I saying. I know she's been gone, but she's still my wife... Was my wife I mean. She deserves respect. Her memories and the life we shared together deserves respect. Saying that they have never seen me this happy, is like saying I wasn't happy with her...that she didn't make me happy. They're making it sound like she doesn't count. It's like saying she doesn't meant anything and that she's replaceable.

She's not...

No one can replace her...

Not even Arabella.

I loved her with all my heart. That's never going to change. Just because I'm moving on with my life, doesn't meant I don't love her anymore. If they're right about one thing, it's that Cassie would have wanted me to move on. She said so in her letter. I've done my best to make her wishes come true, but I'll be damn, if I let myself love someone else. She will always be my wife, and Lia's mother. Arabella is just...

Well what is Arabella to me?

She's... I choked on my words. Hell, she's my wife now, and she's the mother Lia has now.

Mio dio!

"Hey man, are you okay?" Marco said, interrupting my thoughts, as he clapped my back.

"I'm fine," I muttered.

"Then why in the hell do you have a scowl on your face. It's your wedding day, you should be happy and smiling. Hell, you should be dancing with that wife of yours," he said.

Right... I am happy. Really happy. It's just that... I shook my head mentally. Yes, I should be happy and smiling. "You're right," I said. As I make a move towards my wife, Marco stopped me.

"Man, I know that look you had, and take my advice, let it go, man."

"What are you talking about?" I asked.

"Cassie. You're thinking about her and you're feeling guilty," he said.

"I don't know what you're talking about," I said sternly.

"I know you, Massimo. I know you well enough to know that that's exactly what you're thinking about. And I'm telling you to stop. She wouldn't have wanted you to spend the rest of your life alone. You loved her, we all know that. We all saw it, but she's been gone a long time, and it's time for you to move on."

"I am. I have. I married her didn't I?" The words that left my mouth sounded cruel. I wanted to take it back, but it was too late. I didn't mean to make it sound like that.

Marco simply shook her head. He looked like he wanted to say something about my foul remark, but he held back, and simply said, "I hope so man, because you're going to end up hurting Ara, if you're still pining over what could have been. She loves you man. She deserves love in return. and quite honestly, I can tell you already feel more for her than you're letting on. Don't screw it up man."

Hell. What the hell is up with everyone? I fucking care about her isn't that enough?

"Marco, I care about her, I wouldn't have married her if I didn't. You know me better than that. I also didn't mean what I said to sound like it did," I scowled.

He nodded. "Just remember, care is not love, Massimo," he said.

I glared at him. "I know what I'm doing, so does Arabella. We understand each other," I said.

"Whatever you say man. I just... Never mind. You're right, you know what you're doing. I'm just happy you're happy Massimo you're not just my best friend. You're my brother. And Arabella, she's become like a sister to me. I'd hate for any of you to get hurt," he said.

"Thanks. Don't worry, I know what I'm doing. So does she," I said. "I'm gonna go dance with my wife," I said. But as I walk away, I had this nagging ache in my gut, that I can't quite figure out. Then Arabella and Lia's laughter ring in air. I turn my gaze at them, and I put all the worries and all that talk behind me, and walk towards Arabella.

"Hey you," she said, as she looks up to greet me.

"Hey you, yourself," I said.

"Principessa, why don't you go with nonna, while I dance with mommy," I said.

"Okays," she said happily.

"Can I have this dance, Mrs. Anastasi," I said, holding out my hand to Arabella.

She grinned and placed her hand in mine.

I led her to the dance floor, but before I pull her into my arms, I looked over where the wedding planner was standing and nodded my cue at her. She nodded back, in acknowledgement.

"Ladies and gentlemen. The groom has chosen a special song to dance to with his bride. Please turn your attention to Mr. and Mrs. Anastasi as they move to the dance floor and dance for the first time as husband and wife.

Then right on cue, Foy Vance's Guiding Light played in the background.

"I told you this before, cara. You're my guiding light. Thank you for saving me," I said, bringing tears to her eyes, and I gently wiped them away with my thumb. I may not love her, but I care enough to not want to hurt Arabella, ruin what we have.

"I love you so much Massimo. Thank you. Thank you for making my dreams come true," she whispered softly and lovingly.

I pulled her closer to me in response. I can't help but feel that nagging ache grow bigger. But for now... I'll push it aside.

Arabella

As we dance our first dance, to a song Massimo has personally chosen, I feel so overjoyed, and yet there is still a part of that feels empty. There's small part of me that aches and longs to hear the words I love you, from Massimo's mouth.

People must think I'm crying tears of joy, and I am - but it's mixed with sadness too. I have never felt this strong need to hear those words come from Massimo, but I feel them now. But at the same time, right here in his arms, I can feel that he does. I can feel that he loves me. Or is it just me reading too much into this.

What am I doing? Why do I have to ruin such a perfect moment? I just got married to the man I love, and now, I am in his arms, dancing to a song that he has chosen for us.

With that thought, I put my worries and sadness behind me, and let the lyrics of the song wash through me.

When I need to get home
you're my guiding light,
you're my guiding light.

When I need to get home,
you're my guiding light,
you're my guiding light.