Fork Diaries

Chapter 1 - First Day

Well here goes... Mum got me a napkin diary for my birthday so here I am, writing to you.

Oh boy, first day of high school here in West Phorkadelphia school, OVER! Has there been anything I've hated more?! I have no choice but to go, I want a future!

I stepped through those huge doors and there was literally a sea of cutlery. I knew no one but I'd gotten some fancy engraving over the summer, hoping for a good first impression. So I made my way to my assigned locker, poking my way through the other cutlery until I reached the drab locker. It was a plain napkin door and the inside didn't boast much either.

Then I saw the locker next to mine. OMG it was beautiful.

It wasn't just a napkin, it had been encrusted with silver rhinestones around the edge and two initials printed on: MH

That was some rich family of cutlery.

With a sigh, I turned around and suddenly, everyone parted like the RED SEA or something.

Through the middle, a knife sailed through, acting like a queen. She wore Emporio Spoonmani and held a Dolce and Forkbbana purse. Talk about BLING!! Finally I noticed her initials engraved on her blade: MH. Damn, I could literally see the boys drooling.

She stopped at none other than the locker next to mine. Ugh, I could smell the expensive sauce from a distance, compared to my cheap gravy.

'OMG EW. What IS that smell?!' She whined, as soon as she got to the locker.

'It smells like GRAVY. Yuck, I DEMAND to be sprayed!'

Just then, a group of similarly dressed cutlery arrived and began spraying her. 'Is that okay, Macknifezie?' 'Poor you!' 'OMG gravy was totes last season!' 'Macknifezie!' 'Macknifezie!' Tired of the drama, I walked away while Macknifezie sashayed off in the other direction.

I already hate that sashay.

Class was pretty boring, but I'll be back tomorrow!! I think...

A/N So this is the Fork Diaries series!! Basically it's a parody of Dork Diaries but with cutlery. The story is being co-written so if writing styles are different, that's why!