7 june 2011

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age 15

i woke up and had a shower, i got changed and looked at myself in the mirror. all i saw was a depressed, broken girl. i shook my head and reached above for the cabinets where liam and louis kept their razors in. 

there were 3 bathrooms in this house. the main one, where there was a big shower, dual sink, toilet and bath. thats where liam and louis kept their stuff, i also used this one as my main. niall and harry used the other one, which was just a bit smaller than the main and didnt have a bath, and zayn had a small one in his room, it had a small shower, sink and toilet, it was the smallest out of all of them.

i grabbed one of the razors, knowing ill regret my decision, but decided ill do it anyways. i rolled up my sleeves pressed the razor against my wrist, letting the blood ooze out, into the sink. i did 3 on my right wrist, and 2 on my left. i made sure they werent still bleeding, and covered them back up. returning to my usual day, 

-eat a small amount,

-secretly burn it off or purge,

-eat small amounts,

-take medication,

-cut,

-complain

repeat.


and harry thought i was getting better

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