What will happen next?

Part Six

A couple of weeks passed and everything was going well. My nausea was much less than in the beginning and my belly was growing. The baby was still healthy and perfect.
Today was the last day of my first trimester, which also meant that it was time to tell Alex about the baby. I waited long enough now it would just be mean not to tell him. He has the right to know about the baby but I don't know how I am going to tell him, it's not like I can just show up and saw surprise you're going to be my baby daddy. I would love to able to just tell him over the phone but if it were me, I would want to hear it in person rather than over the phone.

It was now 4a.m. and I was still awake going over every possible scenario in my head. What if I showed up and he just shut the door in my face or what if he starts yelling at me for showing up. How would I feel when I see him again? Will I be able to hold myself together or would I break down in front of his farm house? Was he going to be happy or wanting me to go away and never come see him again? Would he like to be in the baby's life or would he be an absent father? I was thinking about every possible outcome, most of them ended in me leaving and never hearing from him again. What would I do when he tells me he wants to be in the baby's life, how were we supposed to be just friends? If he wanted to be in the baby's life how would we schedule everything and how involved would he be?

*knock knock*

"Good morning Jo." Meredith came in my room and sat next to me.

"What time I it?" I asked Mer with a confused look. I looked out the window and saw that the sun was shining bright.

"It is 9a.m. Are you ok? Jo what is wrong?" Meredith looked at me with a worried smile and took my hand.

"Euhm yea... I just have been up all night. It is the last day of my first trimester which means I have to tell Alex soon. I went over every possible scenario of how he would react to the news. Mer I don't know if I am ready for this but I know I have to face him." I looked at Meredith and she gave me hug reassuring me that it would all be ok and that she was there for me and that if I wanted she would come with me.

"Thank you Meredith but I think I have to do this on my own. I have an OB appointment in 2 hours and I think I'll leave this weekend to tell him everything. Meredith you have this weekend off right?"

"Yes why?"

"Would you please come to Kansas with me I will need the support. I will go to the farm alone but I need you before and after, but only if you can and want to."

"Of course I will come Jo."

We went to wake up the kids and made them breakfast. The kids asked why my belly was getting big and because it was the last day of my first trimester I could tell them what was going on. The kids were very excited and asked if they were getting a new niece or nephew seen as we are practically all a big family here. I told them that I didn't know yet but that for the second I did they would be the first to know. After breakfast we all went upstairs to get ready, the kids for school and Meredith and I to go to the hospital.

At the hospital 1 hour later

My OB appointment was in 5 minutes so we went up to the OB floor and took place in the waiting room. 4 minutes later Carina came out of an exam room and called my name. We stood up and went to the exam room she was standing in front of.

"So last day of your first trimester, how are you feeling?"

"I am good I don't feel nauseous anymore so yeah that's a lot better."

"Ok let's take a look at that baby of yours. He/ she has still 10 fingers, 10 toes and 1 perfectly shaped body. Jo your baby looks very healthy. I do want to take your blood and run it by the lab to check you out too."

Carina took my blood and gave it to a nurse to bring to the lab. She asked me if I had any questions, which I didn't and then asked me if I had already told the baby's dad the news. I looked down and told her that I was planning on seeing him this weekend but that I didn't know how to tell him after he left me with a letter just a few weeks ago. She told me that I should just do what feels right and what I feel comfortable about. I thanked her and went back down to the surgical floor with Meredith. In the elevator she turned to me and gave me a big hug while telling me:

"Everything will be fine. I will always be here for you, whatever you need."

We both went to our uwm patients. When I arrived at the nurses station the interns didn't give me one second to rest before they started sucking up again to get in in one of my surgeries. I ignored them and went to the OR where my first patient was already prepped and ready. The surgery took 3 hours and then I went to the next one. After 3 more surgeries it was finally time to go home.

The next day

"Jo are you ready to leave, we have to get to the airport now if we don't want to miss our flight." Meredith yelled from the front door.

"I'm coming!" I said while running through the house.

We stepped in the car and left for Kansas. I can't believe we were actually doing this, I was really going to see Alex again and then shock him with my unexpected pregnancy.

We arrived at the airport and got to our plane just in time. The plane went up and before we knew it we were landing in Kansas. We took a cab to our hotel and went out to go get some dinner. After dinner we went back to the hotel and got ready to go to bed knowing that tomorrow would be a very difficult and emotional day.