PSYCHO | BANG CHAN [✓]

CHAPTER SIXTEEN

Misun had gone to Daegu, leaving Chan alone in his apartment for the first time in a very long time. Usually he was at Misun's house, the cafe or his workplace. He had only stopped in quickly to get ready for work recently, and he was not welcoming the silence he had once yearned for.

Meeting Misun led Chan to dread being left alone with his thoughts, especially when they were so loud lately. Constant doubts swirling around his mind, worries, and Misun. Misun, Misun, and Misun.

It was always about Misun.

God, how he wanted to be with her right now. It had only been a couple hours since he had watched her get on a train to Daegu. She had waved with her bright smile, eyes only on Chan, before blowing a kiss through the window as the train took her away from him.

He knew he shouldn't be acting like this, she deserved to spend time with her family, he had just wanted to be included in that. Which also wasn't fair to want, realistically they hadn't been together for a long time, meeting her family would be a big step. A step Misun had every right to decide when to take.

Chan just had to survive a few days, a few days without her, a few days without being selfish. He'd distract himself with work as much as possible, they'd talk on the phone when they both had the free time to do so, it would be fine.

So why did he feel as if he were empty as he said that? He had a pit in his stomach at the thought of something going wrong, and he didn't feel whole without her. He hadn't realized how reliant on her he had become. He knew deep down it wasn't healthy to feel this way. Chan had been his own independent person before he had met her, and now he didn't know what to do with himself.

Regardless of that, Misun was still the best thing that had ever happened to him and he wasn't going to talk himself into a storm of doubt and thoughts that were unwelcome. So, he went about his day as best he could.

He distracted himself with work, bringing extra home to work on when the apartment grew too quiet and empty. This worked for two days, two days of being without Misun apart from her voice on the phone and occasional texts, two days of convincing himself he could survive the next few days too. But then the dreams started.

Similar to when he first began to dream of her, dreams that were so realistic he woke up convinced they were reality. Dreams where he felt every touch and emotion which still lingered when he awoke. It was driving him crazy, being so close to her, feeling her and then waking up to a cold bed when she was usually curled up right beside him. He began to wonder if he truly was losing his mind, or if he had already lost it.

One dream in particular had been the last he could handle. He could see her in Daegu, smiling up at him, holding his hand as she dragged him through the streets. Her hand was warm, he felt happy. But soon her hand slipped away from his, and she was lost in the crowd. He looked over the people around him, pushing through the crowd that only seemed to grow thicker the more he pushed.

As the frustration and panic grew, he caught a glimpse of her. Just for a moment, walking onto the crosswalk and turning around to look at him just as a car slammed into her body. Chan felt his blood run cold and a strangled cry escaped his lips. He ran over, seeing her body on the street, a pool of blood surrounded her as she looked up at him. "Why weren't you there to protect me, Channie?"

He woke in his bed after that, a cold sweat covering every inch of his body. Tears lined his cheeks, chest heaving, his heart felt hollow, he felt empty. Her scream echoed around the apartment, the last words she muttered bouncing around in his head. Why wasn't he there to protect her? He was sitting in Seoul while she was in Daegu, miles away from keeping her safe.

Chan decided then and there that he didn't care how crazy he would look, he needed to be in Daegu with her. He would keep to the sidelines if need be, find a way to keep an eye on her without her knowing if he had to. Whatever it took to ensure nothing could happen to her, because regardless of what she might think if she knew he had followed her, he would never forgive himself if something were to happen.

That was how he found himself on a train to Daegu with nothing but a small backpack of clothes, his phone and a list of places and addresses he had found through her posts from her time in Daegu. It wasn't much to go on, it was almost useless, but it was something. If this didn't work, he would find another way. He just needed to know she was safe.

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AN: guess who's back from the dead! it's been a HOT minute since an update but after a writing slump i think i'm back for below average updates (we'll see i've said that before lmao) my shift at worked changed (again) so that sucked and didn't help with being unmotivated with writing (who thought a triple split shift was a good idea anyway) but i'm going to try really hard to actually update and finish this fic and i appreciate anyone who has stuck around for me to finally get it together! hope you've all been well, the times we're in are crazy and i hope you're all staying safe and healthy!

alsooooo, i won a video call with chan last month and i'm still really ???? over it. like.... i talked to the loml what the hell ??? what village did i save in my past life ?????

ANYWAY!!! this author's note is longer than the update itself but i hope you enjoy the update! things might be getting a little crazier from here hehehehe