Rebel Heart [#1]

THIRTY-THREE - Shatter

If it were any other day, I wouldn't be that bothered. Ha, who the hell am I fooling? 

Here I stand, body shivering, head spinning, heart pumping out of control and jelly legs. With all of this overloading my body, there only thing going through my mind... How do I get out of here?

My feet are glued to the floor while Luca cleans the counter where usually the tattoo materials are. Instead, this time around, a girl---one I recognise---sits on it. Legs crossed and turned into his vision rage, with his upper body leaning towards him. 

As they talk a couple of smirks escape his mouth and it seems to send her a message, the kind that tells her to touch his shoulder and lean further to kiss him.

She kisses him and he lets her. Luca doesn't step back nor push her away. He just stands there motionless as she glues their lips together and wraps her arms around him.

I came here for a good time, looking to relax and forget my problems, only to be smacked in the face with this. Forcing me to face my feelings and their depth once and for all. I am fucked.

My eyes blur as I try---and fail---to process everything. This is too much.

So much so that I lose my balance, letting my shoulder hit the glass door and unwillingly making my presence known. Fuck, I need to get out of here.

 But my body doesn't move and by the time I can finally stand upright, a low husky voice stuns me in place.

"Mel?" Shit. "Everything alright?" 

My eyes sting at the same time a thick knot grows in my throat. And yet, I power through, stammering out a "Yeah."

Fisting my hands into closed fists, I manage to find the strength to look sick rather than bothered, "I came to see you, but I think my dinner was not so good..." My hand covers my belly for good measure. "My stomach is acting up so I am going home. We can talk later, sorry." 

"Need a ride?" He asks. There is a dark edge to his tone, finally making me look at him. I am met with a deep frown, framing concern on his face. One would think he worries...

"Of course not." 

"Mel, wai-" 

"I have to go!" I cut him off, turning around and walking away.

Not wanting to show anything else I keep my steps steady, rhythmically even.  At least until I turn around the corner. 

Once out of sight, I take a deep breath and look behind me. When it's certain he's not coming after me I let myself think. With each passing second and realisation that it's my fault I let myself get into this, adrenaline slithers into my veins as my speeding heart pumps the blood away. That's when my legs take over.

I run. Up until my lungs burn and my ribs sting. I run until I hear the soft sloshes of the water against the stone, stopping by the river shore.

Once here, in the darkness of the night with nothing more but the fish in the water and the bats flying around to listen to me, I allow myself to break down.