The Bad Boy's Forever (TBBG Series #3) NOW PUBLISHED

Chapter Five: Desperate Times Call For Abusing Your Dad's Credit Card

Chapter Five: Desperate Times Call For  Abusing Your Dad's Credit Card 

"Not that I care but are you like, okay?"

Concern coming from Leila is strange, like waking up in an alternate universe where carbs don't go straight to your hips. I blink a couple of times to make sure I heard her right and she probably thinks I'm an idiot.

"Uh yeah, why wouldn't I be?"

"Because you've been staring at the computer screen for the last five minutes as if your favourite pair of shoes are out of stock."

I mean my problem is a lot more serious than not finding shoes but I'm assuming it would something really tragic for Leila.

"I'm fine, honestly." I give her a thumbs up that she eyes weirdly. Then with a toss of her hair she goes back to work, back to the same job as I am and that's prepping for our Chicago trip. Ever since she's found out about it she's been on edge, like a newly sober alcoholic trying to not to look at the six pack of beer in the corner store. I don't know why but she seems to think we're competing, when realistically there's nothing there for us to win. This campaign will be shared by us equally, our job descriptions are basically the same and Amy doesn't exactly play favourites so I'm not sure what my colleague is gaining by constantly trying to one up me.

Regardless, I'm not in the mood to compete today. The fact that Cole won't be there when I fly out to Chicago has put a major dent in my mood and in my plans. I don't know when I'll see him next, probably Thanksgiving but even that remains to be seen because of his dad's health. I miss him so much that it's physically affecting me and weighing me down. Everyday that I have to get out of a lonely bed and later go back to an empty apartment makes me question my decision to get a job in New York.

I could have stayed with him, we could have been together. But, a voice inside my head whispers, we needed this time apart to grow up and as cheesy as it sounds, find ourselves. For so long, I've always pictured myself in relation to Cole and now in this city where every decision has to be about me and only me, it feels strange, like I'm doing something wrong. But at the same time I'm finding out a lot about who I am as a person, every single day that I survive on my own and that's an experience I really wouldn't want to miss out on.

So yes, it's tough and it's difficult to go so long without seeing Cole and yes I have the occasional sob fest but at the end of the day, I see our temporary separation for what it is; a chance to grow up and to define ourselves as individuals before we dive headfirst into our lives together.

***

On my way back home that night something happens that's never happened before and I don't quiet know what to make of it. I'm well aware that I'm not the only one living in the building and that I do have my fair share of neighbors. It's yet another fallback of my antisocial nature that I haven't gotten myself acquainted with anyone on my floor let alone the building. I think we work odd hours and although I've seen people in passing and in the elevator, there's never been any time for chit chat.

Which is why I'm surprised when as I'm making my way out of the elevator, juggling five different bags of groceries and my bag and my keys, nearly spilling the contents of all of the above on the floor I have a very kind stranger help me and grab some of my bags before

"Whoa, are you okay?"

In so many way I'm not but I bet this guy doesn't want to hear about my existential crisis so I give him the short brief, normal answer.