Listen Out For Love (GirlxGirl)

Chapter Eight

That's when i woke up from my dream.

Just kidding.

This was as real as the cut on my lip.

Which hurt by the way.

Her lips were soft against mine as she pulled away and looked into my eyes. Only, while mine were cloudy from the amazing sensation her lips caused me, hers were filled with panic. I was unsure of why she had that look in her eyes, but i knew i had done the wrong thing as soon as she did.

Pulling further away, she stood from the bed and paced over towards her bag, taking out a book. I frowned, watching her. Words were stuck on the tip of my tongue, yet i couldn't speak. What was i supposed to say? 

"I have coursework to complete for college tomorrow, i should get to it." She stated, before sitting on the other side of the bed. I sat there, listening to the background noises of the film we were watching. 

The tingling sensation was still evident upon my lips as i watched the tv screen, the credits rolling. I sometimes wished love was that easy. Perhaps life could be that easy and not so much as fighting for the person you love. I guess things were meant to be this way, just overly dramatic and hard.

I used to have a tendency of ignoring people who portrayed their love for me, or perhaps they were trying to be my friend. Yet, one girl can change my entire way of thinking within a second of looking my way.

"Ok" I replied, unsure of what to do.

Instead of questioning the situation, i pretended to do some work myself as i sat at my desk and scanned through the work i had already completed. 

I thought about running away and perhaps burying myself in my allure of desperation. For a while, the silence overcame me as i thought of ways i could deter the awkward situation. However, the words blurred on the pages i had etched in the back of my mind various times this week, before i gave up and spun around in my chair.

"So are we just going to pretend that didn't happen?" 

She turned towards me, her hands clenching tightly onto the book she was reading and the pen she was chewing nervously onto. I took a deep breath as she sighed, putting the book down. 

Could i possibly let this whole thing go? Was i supposed to pretend i didn't have feelings for her. She was the first person who made me want to open up everything I've ever held onto. 

"If that's ok?" She said, turning the page of her book as she stared back into it. 

"But why?" 

"I can't- I'm not gay ok?" She urged, putting her book down as she stared at me from across the room. 

I looked down, feeling my stomach knot inside. I was hoping she felt the same and in some strange world we'd run away together in some happily ever after tale. Things don't go the way you plan though do they.

"I thought-"

"You thought nothing, i'm not like you..." She interrupted. 

My mouth stayed ajar as the tone in her voice raised, her eyebrows scrunched together. 

"I thought i was, but i'm not." She said, before grabbing her bag and storming out of the room.

I sighed, feeling a headache come on all of a sudden. Why am i so stupid? I should of just let this whole feelings thing go. Now, here i was watching the empty space by the door where she had just walked out. 

I wanted to run after her, but my legs stayed put.

God dammit, why do you always ruin things. You should have just kept your lips to yourself Katelyn. I kept thinking about texting her and apologizing. However, why should i do such a thing, when it was her who walked away.