Save You Tonight

38.

Harry POV

The sun was hot and the breeze was very infrequent, but thankfully my patio table was in the shade, making it a little more comfortable. The shade may have helped with the sun but it sure didn't help with my nervousness. I wish Maci was here with me, holding my hand and calming me like she does. I don't know how many times she's reassured me that everything was going to go fine today and deep down I knew they would be but I was still nervous. This was huge. This would make or break something that we've all worked so hard for.

"So, should we get right to it then?" Louis says, sliding his chair closer to the table, the metal legs of the chair scraping against the brick of the patio, making me cringe at the awful sound.

"First I want to apologize if I made Maci feel uncomfortable earlier," Liam said, looking a little worried.

"She was just a little embarrassed. She's ok, I just hadn't told her you guys knew a little about what had happened," I tell them, waving my hand, brushing the whole thing off. Maci said she was alright and I explained to her that the guys didn't know much and that seemed to relax her a bit.  Enough for her to let me kiss her like I did.  Man that kiss... Focus Harry.

"Great. So shall we?" Liam asked, looking around at the three of us. We all nod and stay silent. I don't think any one of us wanted to speak first or knew how to start.  How do you start a conversation about wether or not you end your career with your best mates?

"So, I guess I will just start," I begin, just wanting to get this over with. I clear my throat before beginning again, "so I've been thinking about branching off on my own, find my own sound, find who I am. I'm just torn between that and sticking with you guys and keeping One Direction alive. I don't want to let you guys down..." I tell them, looking down at my hands that were clasped together on top of the glade table.  I couldn't look at them, I couldn't see if their eyes held any disappointment.

"Ah Harry, you wouldn't be letting us down. We've been at this for five years mate, it's only natural to want to see what else is out there.  I've actually been toying with the idea of working with Modest to launch my own golf agency, finding new talent and giving them my backing,  get their name out there." I look up at Niall as he speaks, shocked that he hasn't said anything until now. 

"Why haven't you said anything?" I ask, Liam and Louis nodding in agreement.

"Nothing really has been set in stone yet. I've just been working away on the plans. slowly I might add." Niall explains and I nod, wishing I would have known about this sooner, I would have felt less horrible about thinking of going off on my own. 

"I've actually been working with some other artists on getting my own sound together.  It was just a for fun type of thing but now I'm really considering going off on my own as well," Liam tells us. I knew he was working with other artists and everything, I just think he was leaning towards going solo.

"Well, nice to see you lads have everything figured out. I kind of want to venture out on my own but I think some extra time with Freddie is what I need right now. I totally support all of you though. We've been going at all this for so long, it's time for us to find who we are as individuals." Louis adds in, saying what he told me last week when I talked a little about all this with him.

"It is such a relief hearing you guys say all this. I've been beating myself up for weeks, dealing with Simons constant bickering for me to make up my mind like its some easy decision to make," I say, sighing as I lean back into the cushioned chair.