Floating at Night

18. Burning

Baker pulled into the parking lot of some small town bar a few counties over. Spuds I think. This is the third time in the past few weeks that he's picked me up on his motorcycle and taken me somewhere with no explanation.
I can't tell if I love it or hate it.
"Two beers," he called to the bartender, leaving me to set up the pool table. I racked the balls, smirking as he came back with a basket of peanuts from the bar.
"Ready for me to whoop your ass?" I joked, brushing past him.
"Did you forget who taught you everything you know?"

And just like that, the memory of what he did to me comes back front and center and I am forced to confront the pain.
"How could I."
He passed me a beer and we started our game before we had time to rehash the old days.
A few beers later, I'm buzzed enough to be having more than a good time. Baker is at the bar chatting with an old biker buddy as I let my body move freely on the dance floor. It wasn't very long until I felt two hands on my waist. Assuming it was Baker, I twist my hips a few times before I turn around, surprised to find someone who is very much not Baker staring back into my eyes.
Justin.
"What are you doing?" I ask, pulling myself away from him.
"My friends brought me here to get me out of my apartment. When I saw you dancing, I couldn't help myself. I miss you, Noelle." His eyes were sad as he leaned in even closer to me.
"We broke up, Justin. For good reason. Neither one of us wanted to do the long distance thing. We agreed." I placed my hands on his chest to keep him from progressing toward me when a firm back stood in front of me.
"She's good, bro. She's with me." Bakers voice was unwavering. The effect of the beers was fading quickly as I tried to pull Baker away from him.
"Stop! Baker, you are not helping. Go back to your bar friend." I shoved him toward the bar but he stayed near, lurking a few feet away like a security guard.

"I get it, you went back to him. That's why you wanted to break up." Justin's voice was louder than before. I could tell he was angry and quite possibly wasted. Nothing about this situation seemed smart.
"No, Justin. Baker and I are just friends. We're putting all the shit behind us."
"Yeah, your friend looks like he's ready to get in that tight little skirt," his words were laced with rage. I knew if I didn't calm him down he was going to blow a gasket.
"Justin, calm down and we can talk." I reached for his hand but he pulled it away.
"No thanks. I don't have time to talk to you anyway. I've got a girl waiting for me."
His words stung. But I deserve them. Even if I know he has to be lying.
If he had another girl he would have never had his hands on me like that, right?

As soon as he walked away I found the bartender and slammed back a few tequila shots back to back. Tonight is definitely a night I'm not going to want to remember.

I slammed my front door shut behind me as Baker tried to catch up. His voice trailing behind me.
"Noelle, stop!"
His voice was thunderous, it could make any grown man's legs run wet with piss and here I am, toe to toe with the motherfucker.
"Oh, or what? Huh? What are you going to do to me you big bad biker boy?" I was screaming back at him, but nothing was louder than my heart beating against my skull.
Da-doom. Da-doom. Da-doom.
"You gonna hit me?" I teased, inching closer to him.
His eyes flashed with hurt, then anger. Then they went dark.
"You want me to fight with you but it's not going to happen," his voice was smooth, with just the right amount of intensity dripping from each word.

Fuck.

"Get out." I shoved at his chest. Then again. I was practically pounding on his body with my little fist and he was barely budging. Well, the tequila always makes me think I'm stronger than I am.

"Baby doll..." his voice was barely audible over me screaming at him to get out.
Suddenly his hands were on my hips, spinning me around so that I'm pressed against the edge of the counter, then he gently sets me on top of it.

"What're you doing?" I asked through gritted teeth. My hands were shaking as his stayed firm on my hips. Standing between my legs.
"Are you going to explain to me what I did that was so wrong?"
My mind flashed back through the night, the bar he took me to, the way he stood over me all night like I was his... Justin.
"You hit him. Baker, why did you have to hit him?"

There it is. The remorse I've been searching for since he did it. It was gone just as quick as it came but it was there, I know it.
"He deserved it."
I shook my head, letting my hands unclench from his chest that I was beating a few minutes ago. Absentmindedly he pulled my hands down to my sides and held them there.
"You were jealous..." I sat up a bit straighter, cocking my head as I spoke. "You can't just hit every man I was fucking after you left me."
I could see the spark of anger reignite and I knew I grazed the surface.
"Sure I can. I did, didn't I?"
If this is his way of asking if Justin was the only one, he's going to have to work harder than that.
Even if there was only Justin, I'm having more fun pushing his buttons than I was when he pushed mine.
"Noelle..." he growled, his hands on my hips again.
"Tell me, Baker," I stopped, wrapping my legs around him. "Does it make you hot... Knowing I wrapped these legs around other guys?"
His eyes clenched shut as he looked down, his jaw ticking as he took a deep breath.
Suddenly, he tore himself from me. He put distance between us like I was toxic waste and he was trying not to get contaminated.
"If you're trying to piss me off-" I cut him off, "why would I do that?"
I let my legs drift further apart as his eyes traveled up my thighs. My leather skirt had ridden up when he put me on the counter so I knew he could see straight up my skirt to my black lace panties.
"Noelle..." he warned, trying to pull himself further away from me as I plastered an innocent grin on my face.
"Hmm?" I hummed in response, feeling myself fall forward.
His arms were around me in an instant, cradling me to his chest and carrying me down the hallway toward my bedroom.
He pulled my sneakers off of my feet and pulled the blanket up to my waist. Like the gentleman he is, he pressed his lips to my forehead and whispered goodnight in my ear before I passed out, holding onto his arm so tight my knuckles would be sore when I woke up.