SHITPOST LORD

"There are two things that are infinite. The universe and human stupidity, and I'm not too sure about the universe 
-Einstein"

I sexually Identify as an Attack Helicopter ever since I was a boy I dreamed of soaring over the oilfields dropping hot sticky loads on disgusting foreigners. People say to me that a person being a helicopter is impossible and I'm fûcking retarded but I don't care, I'm beautiful. I'm having a plastic surgeon install rotary blades, 30 mm cannons and AGM-114 Hellfire missiles on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me "Apache" and respect my right to kîll from above and kîll needlessly. If you can't accept me you're a heliphobe and need to check your vehicle privilege. Thank you for being so understanding.


"GET OUT OF MY BATHROOM REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE"
-PUBG player


Alright children time for a story! 
*picks up book*
Once upon a a time, he spanked my ass like an African drum