Jealousy
─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───
You walked along the pavement with a cake box containing little pieces of Taehyung's favourite cakes. As much as you recalled, Taehyung said he will be finished with his lessons just about this time.
Passing a smile to the passerby, you enter the hall. Your eyes catch Taehyung, however, he wasn't alone. A female body was beside him, cheerfully smiling and conversing with Taehyung. That's weird, usually, Taehyung runs away from anyone who tries to interact with him. You tried to study Taehyung's face for any discomfort, but you found none. Rather, you found him attempting to smile, which usually was given to you.
You end up deciding to wait until Taehyung was done conversing. However, the time stretched to an entire fifteen minutes and both of them still talked, occasionally giggled without any care for the world. Well, that's a new record for Taehyung, you sarcastically think as usually the conversation he has with anyone other than his friends, are never this long.
You scan the woman. She is gorgeous, to say the least. She had a lean and curvy figure, with tanned skin and stunning curls. Her visuals were serving from head to toe, whereas her height complemented very well with Taehyung's. You weren't sure since when you began to feel insecure.
Taehyung's eyes brush towards you whilst you were busy feeding your irrational thoughts. His lips stretched into a smile when he sees you. ''Hey, Y/n.''
You snap out of your own world when you meet a smiling girl and Taehyung. ''Hi!''
''This is Aly. She's the model whom I am going to be drawing for my project. She's very nice.'' He introduces his new friend.
''Hey, Y/n! Nice to meet you,'' Aly smiled, kindly.
"S-she's the model? Y-you're gonna paint her?" You tried to subdue your jealousy but failed. During these times you were glad that Taehyung couldn't detect the jealousy from you. You wanted to be the cool girlfriend, not an insecure one.
"Yes. She's very nice to me. In fact, she volunteered to be my partner." Taehyung gives you a small smile, showing how happy he was that someone actually made an effort to be nice to him, rather than judging him too quick.
"How can I not? Your works are great, Tae!"
Tae?
"Ah! That's great!" You tiptoe and kiss his cheeks, wanting any sort of skin-ship to assure yourself that he's yours.
"I like that." He vocalises as usual before kissing your lips. You smile, momentarily feeling better until the girl appeared to be witnessing.
''You guys are so cute!'' She says, you and Taehyung both give her a smile.
''I know.'' Taehyung speaks.
Aly giggled before uttering, "Tae! Let's go. We promised to grab something to eat and discuss the project?"
"Alone?!" Your mouth blurts before you could comprehend how stupid you sounded. Of course, they are gonna be alone in the cafe to discuss... like they are going to be alone when he paints her naked, perfect figure. Your mind forced itself to think the worst.
"How can we be alone in a cafe? There are going to be many people there." Taehyung answers you, without thinking too much to it.
"Y/n don't worry! I will take care of him." She smiles, being friendly. You give her a hesitant smile, feeling bad that you're currently painting her to be the bad person in your head, just because of your own insecurities.
"Yes, Aly is not only a model but she's also studying Textiles and Design. She has many ideas for my project." Taehyung mentions, you could guess his excitements even though he couldn't show it. His eyes says it all.
Aly chuckles again, blushing how Taehyung complimented her by hitting Taehyung playfully before resting her palm on his biceps. "Oh, Tae doesn't like to be touched-"
"That is okay. I am fine with it." He forwards a smile to Aly.
Your jaw drops and heart clenched. He only liked my touch? You couldn't help wonder childishly.
"Y/n, I will talk to you later. Aly and I will go out of the campus."
"We have cafes here on campus?"
"Yes, but Aly doesn't like the food from here. It gives her bad stomach." He replies, making you more agitated than before.
"Aww, Tae! You remember? That's so sweet of you. You're so attentive!" She smiles and he smiled back.
Can she stop fucking call her Tae?!
"I will see you later, Y/n."
"It was nice meeting you!" Aly speaks and takes the leave with your boyfriend. You try to tell yourself to snap out and stop feeling like that. Taehyung is allowed to have friends. You feeling like this made you loathe yourself even more.
Your lips escape a sigh before you eye the cake box on your hand.
─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───
"Hey, Jimin!" You cheer. The man possessing an angelic smile appears before you. "Hey, gorgeous!"
"Wanna share cakes?!"
"What do I have to do now? And why are you bribing me?" He laughs after taking a seat next to you. "You really are asking for me to gain all the weight I just burnt!"
You study his body. Sweat glistening against his tattooed skin cleared the doubt that he was running on a treadmill a few minutes ago. "Well! Think happy thoughts! You won't gain weight." You smile and give a proud shrug.
"Psst! You should eat too! Say ah~" The man cooed, waving a piece of cake before your face. You giggle at his mischievousness before playfully rejecting, "No! I don't feel like-" Your speech gets halted when the cake smashes against your face.
"JIMIN!" You shriek, feeling the cream smudging all over your face. Jimin only laughs out loud evilly, throwing his body at the back.
"You look so FUNNY!" He snorts, eyes disappearing into a line as he laughed hard and loud.
You frown before grabbing another piece and try smashing it on his face. The clever man dodges it but eventually the cake lands on his lower face, creating a chocolate beard. "YOU!" Now it was your turn to laugh.
"Eww! Don't lick it! You just worked out and didn't even wash your face!" You managed to say, in between your snicker. Jimin, not hearing you, tries to grab the cake but you beat him to it.
You take the entire box before he could get the hands on it. You planned to throw more at him but his hand comes quickly to push your head to the cakes.
"NO! I'M SORRY! Please don't kill me!" Jimin breaks into another session of laughter but was also scared at how you glared at him without sharing any more words. You get up, gritting your teeth and clenching your jaw before you throw yourself to chase the laughing, chocolate- faced man while having sweet frosting all over your face and shirt.
"COME HERE! You're so dying today!"
-
After washing up and finally settling down on his bed, you still sulkily stared at Jimin who came out of the shower. Jimin only smiled cheekily, knowing very well it was rubbing on your wounds. "I'm not forgiving you! You just ruined my anniversary cake!"
"Anniversary? Of what?"
"My one month of relationship with Tae." You sigh.
"It already been a month?!"
"Well, I don't think Tae remembers it." You talk mindlessly, thinking back about him being with Aly.
"You shouldn't blame him for that. I doubt he knows that one month has to be celebrated or anything!"
"Well...that's not it, my- he's with some other girl. A very pretty one. He was meant to be with me eating that cake, not there smiling and liking someone else's touch!" You find yourself ranting, not realising when you blurted out what was originally meant to rot in your heart.
Upon hearing silence, you look up and view Jimin blankly staring at you. "Don't tell me you're jealous!" Jimin chuckled.
"I'm trying not to be. You think I want to feel like that?"
"Oh come on! me, V and Jungkook sometimes jokingly flirt with you too? V legit has no filter when he talks to you. Tae never questioned that, now that suddenly Taehying has another female friend, you're not liking it? Come on, Y/n! I expected you to be happy that he's making other friends and trying to communicate with others instead of closeting himself."
"I didn't expect this from you at least."
If you felt bad about your behaviour before, now you feel even worse after hearing Jimin. Of course, you were happy that he's with others but Jimin didn't know that he was questioning your feelings as a girlfriend. Maybe it is petty of you to be feeling like that, but nevertheless, it's still your feelings.
"I-It's 4 pm, I should call Tae-" You tried to avoid the topic, not wanting to talk about it any longer.
"Just let him be okay? He will come. Now am I getting any more cakes or-" He returns to be his smiley self.
─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───
Jimin had warned you but here you were, in front of the restaurant where Aly and Taehyung were supposedly having dinner.
Originally you were told that they are only grabbing coffee. However, when you were waiting for Taehyung to arrive and have dinner with you, you received a text from your boyfriend saying the last thing you wanted.
'Y/n, Aly and I will have dinner together before coming. Please, do not wait for me'
You stared at the text angrily, irrational and unwanted feelings taking over your senses. There was no way you are accepting the fact that, your so called 'one month anniversary' would go down to waste like this.
You stared at the door of the restaurant, contemplating if you should go or not. How come Taehyung is suddenly so willing to come to a very crowded place like this? As much as you knew, he absolutely hated restaurants.
More you let yourself think, more difficult it gets for you to think rationally.
With that one sigh, you enter the place. It took you several minutes to locate Taehyung and Aly.
You notice Aly happily laughing at something Taehyung was saying. As much as you could see they were enjoying their company.
You weren't completely sure what was the next step of you after seeing that Taehyung is completely fine, in fact a bit too fine from your liking. However, what you witnessed after is what worked as the last straw for you.
Aly and Taehyung gets up after what it seemed like paying. Aly comes forward to embrace Taehyung and not only that, the woman looks at him for a few seconds, before tiptoeing and placing a long kiss against his cheeks. You couldn't see Taehyung's reaction since his back was facing you. But, as much as you can see he was not stopping her.
"Tae! What the actual heck?!" You scream, alerting the entire restaurant, not only your boyfriend and his friend.
You rush to him. You witness a blank Taehyung and perplexed Aly. "Y/n?"
"Yes! Y/n! His fucking girlfriend. You're such a bitch! How can you just kiss him when he has a girlfriend?!"
"Girl, I think there has been a misunderstanding-" Aly's expression falls into a warmer one.
"No! Fuck off! What kind of girl are you?! Is this what you mean by taking him to a cafe then spend the entire day with him on the day of his fucking anniversary! You are one of those home-wreckers aren't you?! You're such a disgusting human being! I knew-"
"Y/n stop! You're making Aly cry."
That's when you realise, Aly's tears has been streaming effortlessly. You were so blinded by the rage that you completely forgot about the other person's feelings.
"Aly, don't cry. Y/n isn't a bad person, I promise." Taehyung grabs a tissue from the table before offering her.
"Y/n, why are you making Aly sad?"
For the very first time, you heard Taehyung prioritising someone else's feelings before you. He may have not said anything bad, but that one line was enough for your eyes to burst out the tear bag.
"And what about me?!" Your lower lip vibrates vigorously as your eyes sweated more and more. You felt betrayed for some reason. All the people darting their judgmental eyes on you, all the words of Jimin, all the guilt of your embarrassing outbursts; everything proved to be overwhelming you. You felt like a child, wanting reassurance from others that everything is okay, "I'm crying too! Why are you only holding the napkin for her?"
Your mood swung before he could even blink. "Whatever, you can fuck yourself! Kiss her back if you might. You didn't even remember our first month anniversary! Don't even come near me, you asshole!" Your instinct of protecting yourself from any more hurtful words jumped out as you spoke. Drawing a line between both you and him, you clicked your heels to run to the nearest washroom.
Closing the washroom door shut You cover your face before crying out. You recalled what you have done. This wasn't you, why did you act like that there? You knew Taehyung, he isn't like other men, he isn't going after anyone else just because you think he is. "Why did you do it?" You sigh, feeling every kind of emotions. "I shouldn't have done that. Tae must have been so confused."
As a girl, you crossed your limits with calling names to Aly.
Words of V ringed in your ears again. Expectations. You are doing what he feared. You're starting to have expectations from Taehyung.
Expectations to remember a date, expectations of him choosing you over anyone; expectations of him coming after you. And you knew more than anyone, he isn't going to remember a date nor he will always choose you. And most definitely, he won't come after you when you clearly told him to not talk to you.
He isn't about mind games, he's about talk and action. Your action clearly asked him to stay away.
"Y/n." There was a knock on the door.
He came.
"Can you please open up?" He gently asked.
Your tears of shame streamed faster after hearing his voice. "It's a woman's bathroom. You can't come." Voice shaky and broken.
There was a quick pause. "Aly told me to check up on you. She said you're hurt and I should talk to you. She also said she would like to apologise to you for any misunderstanding."
You close your eyes in defeat. It was you who owed her an apology, not the other way round. "Will you now open the door?"
Your tired body got up to click the door open. After seeing his face, eyebrows slightly furrowed in either worry or anger and lips pressed together, he entered the washroom and locked the door.
You hide your face with both of your palms before crying loudly. "I'm so sorry, Tae! I don't know what happened to me-" Hiccups took over your speech and few more sobs broke down. Taehyung watches you cry before grabbing your shoulder and envelope his body on yours.
"You don't have to be sorry to me." He pats you. Time clicked as you shed tears of humiliation against his chest, "I don't like your tears, please stop crying. I do not know why you are hurting but it hurts me too."
You cling on to him even more. "What I did was so stupid. You must be hating me right now? I'm such a mess."
"Why would I hate you?" He removes himself from you to cup your cheeks and wipe your tears. Your face was fully red, eyes bleeding tears while lips plumpy and glossy. "You need to tell me what is wrong because I'm very confused. You said you don't wish to talk to me but you're talking to me and hugging me now."
"I didn't mean it literally." Your heavy lashes fluttered and looked down. That little action was very endearing to Taehyung. He was unsure why he found it so adorable.
"Oh? Is it one of those weird sayings you say like pulling legs?" He asks.
You nod. "May I also know what it is that I forgot? Is it your birthday today?"
"N-no! Erm, it's been a month that we started dating."
"I'm aware of that."
You gulp, feeling guilty. "Well, people celebrate that."
"Oh, I didn't know that."
"I know! I-I'm sorry. I blamed you for nothing. I was just overwhelmed with jealousy." You guiltily speak, unaware when Taehyung's hand rested on your waist and yours on his chest, feeling his heartbeat.
"Is that why you got cakes earlier? To celebrate with me?"
"You noticed?!" Your eyes light up.
"Yes, but I assumed you wanted to eat it on your own. I didn't know it was meant for celebration. I'm sorry."
"Don't say sorry! I'm just stupid and jealous. Aly is so much prettier than me and the fact that you got closer to her in such a short amount of time made me feel like shit." You finally confess.
"You are prettier than Aly. Is this what jealousy is? Am I doing something wrong?"
"No no! Of course not! Just, don't let anyone kiss your cheeks other than me." You look down.
"Okay. I can do that because I only like it when you kiss my cheeks. When Aly kissed me, I felt uncomfortable and weird. Is there anything else I must know?"
You smile at him at that answer. You shake your head in response. "You don't have to do anything with her if you feel uncomfortable. In relationships, both partners must be faithful to one another. It's usually cheating if you kiss or have sex with someone other than your partner. Emotional cheating also involves, when you begin to like someone other than your partner as well as do something and talk and flirt behind your partners back etc. There's a long, complicated concept but you just need to know that you are not doing anything wrong, sometimes I just happen to feel jealous that you are getting close to others and me thinking irrationally that you will leave me for her."
"That's rubbish. I would never leave you, you're perfect. Aly is nice and kind but I do not love her. I only love you."
Your eyes enlarge immediately after that. Heart rushing all the blood to pump faster. He did not just drop the L bomb. At a woman's toilet, in a random restaurant while you look like you've gone through the biggest tragedy of life with a pair of bloodshot eyes, messy hair and runny nose.
''D-did you just-''
Taehyung didn't think too much of what he said. In his defence, he was only being honest of what he felt. ''Can you tell me other things that bothered you?''
You only gaped at him.
''Y/n?''
''Huh?! Uhm... the touching thing. I am happy that you are overcoming it, but it kind of made me feel jealous that you probably would enjoy her touch more than mine and leave me.'' You figured how stupid your thoughts were, now that you are loudly speaking them.
''That is also not true. I like touching you more and I haven't touched Aly. She touched me a few times.'' He ensures and you couldn't help the reddening cheeks. You didn't even know how it was possible for your face to get even get more redder than it already was from crying.
''Is this what you felt? Is it what you call jealousy? I did not like when Jungkook was touching you in the gym. I also feel weird when V and Jimin does too.'' He confesses. "Does that mean I'm jealous too?"
''You felt jealous over me?!'' You question, secretly feeling happy for some odd reason. ''I didn't know I have any reason to make you feel jealous, but I will be mindful towards how the boys behave around me.''
He nods, satisfied with the conversation. He observed you for a while, how unknowingly bite your lower lips while you stared at his. He noticed all of it.
''May I touch you now? I missed your lips today. I suggest we celebrate our one month anniversary with a kiss.'' He determinedly speaks.
You laugh at how serious he sounded until you snake your arms around his neck. He takes the cue to capture your lips with his. He effortlessly picks you up and places you above the counter. Situating himself in between your legs, he kisses you roughly. Satisfyingly moaning at how delicious he felt against you. You yelp when his arms grabbed the cardigan you were wearing and hesitantly toyed with it.
Removing your lips from his mouth with a plop sound, you look at him. ''What's wrong?''
''Is it okay for me to remove your cardigan and feel your bare body against my palm?''
A giggle escapes your mouth, ''Of course, glad you asked rather than ripping it apart.'' You joke before taking off and tossing the cardigan away, revealing your bare body. His eyes light up like a kid on Christmas day.
''Woah. I am so lucky,'' He involuntarily breathes. You half blush and half giggle before Taehyung comes forward to seal his lips on you and his hand reaching for your breast and another one to your waist.
─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───
A/n: isn't it just amazing when the main girl isn't all saint and pure and actually have flaws and insecurities like any other normal human being?
Three updates per week starts from next week! Thank you for reading!
Next update: Monday
- Admin Tata