This chapter will be set out a little differently than the rest. I wanted the whole thing to be in Alexis' POV but I also wanted to add in flashbacks that were in an omniscient POV so hopefully it doesn't get confusing.
Enjoy my beautiful people ❤ sorry for the delay!
Alexis Wilson
Today is the day we lay Roman to rest.
It's been over a week since Calogero broke the news to everyone and my heart has been cracking slowly, more and more as each day passes. He and I grew so close over the time that he was in my life. He became my best friend. And then lover. I'm sure we would've been more if we'd just gotten the chance. I saw him in my life forever - he just gave off those vibes that I'd never received from anyone else before. He'd be my husband someday and I'd be his wife, the woman who would bare his children and take care of him. Now I'll never get to know what feeling that would be like.
I know it seems like my feelings for this man came in a rush but everything about him was so different...so perfect.
Coming to Italy was something I was worried about. It's foreign territory and we were once the enemy of the mafia so I wasn't sure about how anyone would react to us. On top of that I was an emotional wreck. Thankfully everyone has been so supportive and they've done their best to try keep my spirits bright like Roman would've wanted.
My heart aches for him though. I wish I could've gone with him so we could be together, but God clearly has other plans. It's hard to keep the faith right now but I'm trying my best to trust in the man above because he only gives the toughest battles to his strongest soldiers. I know there is purpose for me after I come to terms with the fact that the man I was growing to love is now gone, but it is hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel.
"Are you okay sweetheart?"
I shifted my gaze from the grass to the woman standing before me; Vittoria. She is very much like Emery and gives off pure motherly vibes - something that I definitely have been needing. She's been keeping me well taken care of the past week and I'm extremely thankful for that because if it were up to me I'd lock myself up in my room and cry until I couldn't anymore.
"I..I don't know what to do anymore. It feels like I lost a piece of myself."
She sighed and took a seat next to me. "I know how you feel, I was the same when my ex husband passed away. It may take a long time for you to completely feel better about things again, but you'll get there. You just need to know that he is with you forever in your heart and no matter what, he's always going to be close by. He's your angel now."
"I just wish we could've had more time."
"I know dear but you need to look at the time you got to spend with him. Those are your memories to keep. Appreciate all the little moments you two got to share." She said softly before reaching over and grabbing my hand, giving it a light squeeze. "It'll get easier with time, I promise you that. For now though we have to get going. Everyone is ready and waiting."
I gave her a weak smile and stood to my feet. Vittoria did the same. I followed behind her as we weaved through the house until we were out the front where several cars were lined up. The guards led me to the car I'd be in which I happened to be sharing with Gianna, Devonte and Elena. I instantly started to cry upon seeing Gia - she was cuddled up to Von, sobbing. I guess it had really hit her now that he was gone.
Today is going to be harder than I expected, I can feel it already.
_ _ _
Alexis stirred around in her bed as she felt small kisses being placed all over her face and neck. She turned her head and tried to roll onto her side, but her body was weighted down by something - someone rather.
"Roman stop, please." She whined and tried to push her away. "Bae seriously. You had me up all night, I'm tired and I'm sore. Let me rest!"
"We're supposed to go out today. Come on sexy, I know a strong woman like yourself can handle a little limp."
"I'm not about to be outside looking like a penguin." She replied dryly.
"But you'd be one smoking hot penguin."
Her eyes shot open and a hard mug formed on her face. Roman stared down at her, noticing her face change. Immediately he busted out laughing.
"You're not funny, but if you want to go out then get up off me."
His eyes lit up. "So we're going?"
"If you get off me, yeah."
Roman chuckled but removed his body from the top of hers. He sat on the edge of the bed for a few seconds, admiring the natural beauty he had been shacked up with for the last few days before standing to his feet and running his hands through his curls. Alexis lay still and watched Roman silently. He was truly like no other man she'd met before and being with him brought so much joy to her.
"Quit looking at me like that or I'll do what I did to you last night again and you won't be walking at all."
She quickly diverted her eyes from his body and focused on getting herself up. She pulled the covers back and stood to her feet next to Roman but as soon as she took her first step her legs turned to jelly and she felt her self falling.
"Damn." Roman laughed as he caught her in his arms. "I did put in work, huh?"
"Ugh shut up and let me be so I can get ready."
He helped her back onto her feet again and stepped back to let her continue attempting to get ready for their day out, though deep down he knew that wouldn't be happening, especially from the way she was walking. Lex stepped forward but again, she felt herself collapsing. Roman had certainly put in work again. He was quick to catch her but this time lifted her off the ground and carried her into the bathroom before sitting her on the counter top. He then went over to the bath and started filling it up with warm water and bath salts.
"Bae, what are you doing?"
"I'm going to run this bath for you, then I'm going to make you something to eat and we'll stay here and chill for the day."
"But you wanted to take me out today."
"And I'll just bring the date to you." He said seriously and pecked her lips. "I'm not letting you go out when you're obviously in pain and can't even walk without falling."
_ _ _
"Alexis!"
I snapped out of my daze to see Devonte standing with the car door open waiting for me to get out. Standing behind him on the sidewalk in front of the door to the church was Elena, her brothers, Gianna, Andre and Black. I blinked my tears away and grabbed my purse.
"Are you okay chunky?"
"I'm fine." I said quickly, continuing to blink away my tears. "Lets just get in there please."
In reality I'm far from fine. Being here at this church just solidifies the fact that Roman really isn't here and this isn't just some bad dream that I will wake up from tomorrow.
Von helped me out of the car before we joined the others and entered the church together. So many people had come out to pay their respects - family, friends and I'm guessing mafia people. Roman's casket was right up the front with flowers all around it and two large portraits of him, one from when he was a baby and one that was taken more recently. Everything looked so beautiful and that got me even more emotional.
"Alexis?"
I looked up to see Gianna's dad standing before me with a woman that looked very much like Roman beside him. She was older but she was beautiful, even with her bloodshot eyes and tears slowly rolling down her cheeks.
"Yes sir?"
"I'd like to introduce you to Corrina Bianchi, Roman's mother."
"Oh you're even more gorgeous than I imagined." The woman cooed before pulling me into her arms. "My boy spoke highly of you my dear. Thank you for making him happy."
"H-He told you a-about me?"
"Yes. He always told me about you, he was smitten."
That small piece of information made my heart flutter but also caused the tears to cascade down my cheeks. He talked about me to his mom. His mom! That is a big step for anyone, especially a man.
"I want you to come sit with us dear, my son would've wanted that."
Mrs Bianchi led me over to where they were seated; front and centre. She introduced me to Roman's aunts and uncles, as well as a few of his cousins before we actually sat down. The entire time this woman kept my hand in hers which was a lot more comforting than I would've thought and it was truly something that Ro would've done in this situation. He was just like that. He could be this big bad wolf when he wanted or needed to be but he was as harmless as ever for being a mafia man. For being my mafia man.
Several minutes passed before a choir took the stage to open up the service. They were all dressed in white gowns with gold trimming. Something simple yet classy and very angelic.
Memories surround me
But sadness has found me
I'd do anything for more time
Never before has someone meant more
And I can't get you out of my mind
There is so much that I don't understand
But I know
You're dancing with the angels
Walking in new life
You're dancing with the angels
Heaven fills your eyes
Now that you're dancing with the angels
As soon as they started singing I got lost in the words. They were hitting me harder than ever. Every lyric they sang resonated with me and the pain that I was feeling. I don't understand why it had to be him.
Why did it have to be my Roman?
Why did it have to be the only man I've ever been so stuck on?
We're only here for such a short time
I'm gonna stand up
Shout out
And sing Hallelujah
One day I'll see you again
And We'll be dancing with the angels.
Walking in new life
Dancing with the angels
Heaven fills your eyes
When we're dancing with the angels
When we're dancing with the angels
Dancing with the angels
Dancing with the angels
The piano faded out and the choir took their seats as the priest who was leading the service took his place on the podium. He looked down at Roman's mom and gave her a weak smile before looking out over everyone who'd turned out to pay their respects.
"We are gathered here today to celebrate the life of Roman Leandro Bianchi, for this young man touched the lives of many and will be impossible to forget. You know when I first heard about this young man's passing, I was devastated. I knew his father and that is how I got to meet Roman, the young boy who had much ambition. That's what hit me hard. He never truly got to do what he wanted to implement in his lifetime. I wasn't sure about what pain was worse - the shock of what happened to him or the ache of knowing what never will happen. But I rejoice in the fact that he has been called home to Heaven. He's in a better place and even though we weep now, know that this is not goodbye, this is simply see you again."
_ _ _
"Truth or dare?"
Roman tapped his chin for a few seconds before giving his answer. "Truth."
"Hmmm, okay. This one is a little different but, if you were to suddenly become invisible what would you do?"
"Truthfully?"
"Truthfully."
"I'd probably follow you around all the time and make sure you know that I'm always here with you because lets face it, you love spending time with me. Life would be miserable without me!"
Alexis laughed. "You're so cute, you know that? But I don't know if I'd like that."
"Would you know though? Probably not."
"Mmm true. Your turn."
"Truth or dare?"
"Dare."
A smirk danced onto Roman's face. "I dare you to give me a lap dance."
"A lap dance?!" Alexis gasped before giggling. "I don't even know how to do all that."
"Don't give me that shit. You know how to dance, it's not that different dancing on me. So go put on something sexy and come give daddy the show he deserves."
Alexis rolled her eyes but stood to her feet and walked into her bedroom, heading straight to the closet. She rummaged through her lingerie drawer until she came across one of the new SavagexFenty sets she'd bought. It was perfect and sure to drive him wild..but what was it like it clubs? A man couldn't touch the dancer, right? Well since he wanted this dance that was going to be the rule - he couldn't touch her at all.
She slipped out of her clothes and into the lingerie before putting on a pair of her six inch heels. She wrapped a gown around herself to conceal what she'd changed into, then she made her way back out into the living room.
Roman frowned. "What're you-"
"Ah! You wanted a lap dance so that's what I'm giving you." She said, cutting him off while grabbing a chair. "Sit here and do not move."
He did as told and sat down. She smirked and removed the robe, revealing her outfit to him.
"Now I want you to be a good boy for me, okay baby? That means no touching me at all. You can look but you can't touch. If you touch me then you will be on punishment but if you're a good boy and do as I say, you may just get a happy ending."
Roman gulped. He regretted his dare already...there was no way he could keep his hands off her. Not when she looked like an edible arrangement. That body was asking to be touched. He wanted nothing more then to put a baby in her in that moment, she was asking for it. She certainly knew what she was doing putting all that on and it was definitely working.
_ _ _
I didn't know what to feel as my eyes were fixated on them lowering Roman's casket into his grave. My hearts still slowly shattering to pieces and I've cried out all my tears. I just feel numb. It's like I'm here but I'm not here.
This entire morning throughout the whole funeral service, all that was running through my mind were the memories of us two replaying like old home videos. Some were random little moments and others were when we went out on dates or did something tourist like - all of them hold a special place in my heart though and I'll never be able to let them go, especially the simplest and smallest memories that mean the most to me. Waking up next to him, watching him sleep, joking around with him...those are the little things but they are the things that I will miss the most.
I blinked my eyes several times as a weird feeling washed over me and I suddenly felt dizzy. Stumbling back, Adriano was quick to catch me before I could topple over. He held my arms to keep me standing straight and looked down at me with concern written all over his face. That's one thing I've noticed about these mafia men - they're mostly cold and ruthless but they do have hearts and feelings - they care.
"Are you okay?"
I nodded although my head continued to spin and my vision got blurrier. "I'm fine."
I released myself from his grip but as I went to take a step forward I felt my knees get weak. My vision began to blur even more and started fading out to black. I felt myself falling backwards but someone caught me in their arms. I could hear people calling out my name but it was muffled and I didn't have the energy to reply.
Then it all went to darkness.
_
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Next chapter will follow on from this, then I'm contemplating a time skip between 3 months to a year.
Questions + Responses:
Baby Roman in MM
They laid him to rest 😭
Alexis is really broken over this..
She fainted!
Oh and y'all found out a lil more about Vittoria 😊
Vote, comment & share 😁✌