“...is that it’s never in the right place at the right time,” Tony said, putting up another strand of holly as he continued his work around the compound. “And so, that’s why me and you are putting it up everywhere.”
“I still don’t think this is a good idea, Mr. Stark,” Peter said, though his giggles gave away he really didn’t care.
“Nah, we’ll be fine!” Tony smirked. “See, I’ve got this secret weapon of mine that your friend Ned taught me when you brought him over to work on that lab project of yours that I think you’ll find particularly inviting…”
He then tossed a piece of cardboard at Peter, and that said cardboard was an Uno reverse card. “Nice,” Peter smirked, putting it in his back pocket as he went back to hanging mistletoe. “Thank you Mr. Stark!”
“No problemo, kiddo,” Tony smiled, ruffling his kid’s hair. “Alright… we’ve placed at least two hundred mistletoe so far. Fri, how are we looking in terms of coverage?”
“You’ve covered most common areas, and all of the vents Mr. Barton pokes his head out of most often,” Friday informed them. “I would recommend also putting it outside of bedroom doorways.”
“Ooh, I can’t do that, everyone will smell this fresh ass cologne and be attracted to the doorway after waking up,” Tony said, fidgeting with his collar. “Kid, are you up to the task?”
“On it, Mr. Stark,” Peter smirked, saluting his mentor-father and springing up to the ceiling.
“That’s my boy,” Tony smiled proudly as Peter crawled off to go perform his sacred duty as an Avenger - hanging up mistletoe for their coworker’s misery. Everyone was fast asleep after the lovely Christmas dinner they had had earlier, so Peter likely wouldn’t run the risk of waking anyone up.
Oh, tomorrow was going to be a lovely day.
-0-
Steve was so confused when he exited his room that morning.
Out in the hallway, he noticed Sam walking past, looking up at the ceiling with fully concentrated eyes. So much so that the ex-pilot didn’t even say good morning to the captain when Steve had greeted him, which was very out of character for him. Then, he saw Bucky walking closely behind him, doing the exact same thing.
“Buck, what is going on?” Steve asked, putting his hand across Bucky’s chest.
“Oh, morning Steve,” Bucky said, almost like he was snapped out of a trance. “Sorry - me and Wilson almost got caught underneath a mistletoe earlier, so we’re being super careful.”
“Ahhh,” Steve nodded, now fully understanding why his two friends were being so weird. “Well, should you run underneath one… let me know. I wanna watch that.”
“Jerk,” Bucky smirked, patting his shoulder.
The two super soldiers then walked to the kitchen, where Natasha, Scott, Tony, and Peter were already present. Scott was leaning against the wall, a strawberry-icing donut in one and and a Diet Coke in the other; Natasha was at the table, her feet kicked up as she sipped her OJ, and Peter and Tony were giggling by the sink.
“Morning all,” Steve nodded. “Merry Christmas to you all.”
“Merry Christmas, Cap!” Scott smiled, waving with his donut holding hand. Steve saluted the Ant-Man back, and then smiled as he walked over and started massaging Natasha’s shoulders.
“Merry Christmas, dearest,” smiled Steve.
“Hi there honey, Merry Christmas,” Nat smiled, patting his hand and humming gently at his strong hands making her shoulders release any tension she didn’t even know was there.
“Oh, oh shit! Don’t look up, Capsicle!” Tony laughed, pointing at the two. Peter smiled behind his juice box straw, trying not to laugh.
Steve looked up, and sighed…
Mistletoe.
“Wow… talk about bad luck,” Bucky chuckled. Sam walked in, still looking at the ceiling (and dodging the holly placed above Steve and Nat’s heads) as he made his way to the fridge, almost missing it entirely. Peter almost choked on his juice.
“Hmm, I wouldn’t put it that way,” Natasha smirked, standing up. “Have a holly, jolly Christmas, baby.”
“Mm... gladly, honey,” Steve said quietly, right before their two sets of lips clashed in a passionate kiss.
“Ewww, gross!” Peter laughed, finishing the last of his juice and going towards the trash can. This did absolutely nothing to stop the two from their sweet moment; as a matter of fact, it only deepened after Peter’s remark.
At that moment, Wanda walked in, and made a fake gagging noise at Steve and Nat’s intimacy. “Get a room, you two,” she laughed, walking over and hugging Peter good morning. The two best friends then engaged in a conversation about what Christmas movie they wanted to watch later, and as Steve and Natasha finally seemed to have gotten enough of each other…
Tony started laughing again.
“Mr. Stark? What’s so funny?” Peter asked, raising a brow.
“Oh… oh kid, I remember you placed that one too!” Tony said, now hooting with laughter and leaning against the sink to prop himself up.
“W-what do you-...oh,” Peter whispered, looking up.
Wanda then looked up herself, and the blush that crept onto her cheeks was as red as her scarlet coat. “O-Oh my,” she whispered, trying to cool her cheeks by fanning them - no good.
Again.
Mistletoe.
“W-We don’t, we-we don’t have t-to, y’know, do that,” Peter said, fidgeting with his hands nervously, “I-I mean, y’know, if you aren’t comfortable-I mean that’s what matters most!-if you’re not, then tha-that’s completely-”
Peter was cut off by Wanda pressing her lips to his, making a small “mm!” sound as she planted the sweet kiss on his lips. It lasted way, way longer than a simple peck, and every eye in the room diverted to the two youngest Avengers, loving smiles on every single adult’s face (...was that a tear in Nat’s eye?).
“...Oh... oh my,” Peter whispered, “th-that… uhm… th-that was-”
“Long overdue,” Wanda giggled, brushing a strand of hair behind her ear.
“Y..Y-Yeah,” Peter whispered, smiling all the while.
“Alright, that’s cute as hell,” Scott smiled, pointing at the two. “Young love… reminds me of when Hope and I first fell in love!”
“You’re not young, Scott,” Tony said, looking at his fellow superhero with an odd glance.
“At heart - always,” Scott smiled, taking the last bite of his donut.
At that moment, the vent cover above Scott’s head was knocked down, and Clint’s head poked out. “Ho ho ho, happy holidays from the man in the vents!” Clint called out.
“What’s up, buddy!” Scott smiled at the sight of his best friend.
“Hey, listen, I’ve seen mistletoe in places I didn’t even know it could be legally placed over the compound,” Clint warned everyone. “Don’t find yourself underneath it with someone you don’t wanna kissie-kissie!”
“Pete and Wanda already had to kissie-kissie!” Natasha smiled at the two, causing their blushes to deepen even further.
“Awww! That’s cute!” Clint beamed - somehow, the sight of Hawkeye’s head only sticking out of the vent congratulating the two on kissing only made the situation weirder.
“W-Wanna go somewhere else?” Wanda asked Peter.
“Oh gosh, please,” Peter said, laughing in relief. The two then quickly made their way out of the room (not before holding hands as they did so, though), leaving just the adults…
“Oh… come on, man,” Clint said, his eyes looking to the ceiling.
“What do you-oh,” Scott said, looking up.
I shouldn’t even have to say it, should I?
Mistletoe.
“Eh, who cares,” Clint said, shrugging (that couldn’t possibly be comfortable in his position). “Give a quick one, Scotty?”
“Sure!” Scott smiled. He jumped up as high as he could, and he and Clint’s lips met for a brief second.
“Yes sir,” Clint nodded, smiling and shimmying his hand out so he and Scott could high-five. Certainly not a normal reaction after you're forced to kiss someone, but hey, who are we to judge?
After that, Clint once again retreated into the vents, and Scott smiled as he sipped his Diet Coke.
“If Hope finds out about that…” Sam smirked, finally seeming less tense from his close call with Bucky earlier.
“She’ll understand - rules are rules, yknow?” Scott shrugged, smiling. However, he noticed something between Sam and Bucky, and his face quickly turned to that of dread and amusement “...Oh, oh Sam… oh no…”
Sam’s fight or flight instincts instantly kicked in, and he realized two things at once. One, he had sat down next to Bucky, which was probably not a good idea to begin with. And two…
You know where this is going, don’t you?
Mistletoe.
“Hmm,” Bucky said, sighing and getting up. Sam shot up like a bottle rocket, but not in happiness. As a matter of fact, it was the exact opposite. “You better put that idea away, Barnes, and send it to the fiery pits of Hades,” he warned the super soldier.
“Well… you know the rules, and so do I,” Bucky smirked, putting his hands on his hips.
“No - NO. NO!” Sam exclaimed, backing away.
“Pucker up, Wilson!” Bucky smirked, opening his arms wide and ready for Sam to accept his love.
“NEVER! YOU’D HAVE TO KILL ME FIRST!” Sam yelled, before bolting out of the cafeteria. Bucky laughed aloud, before sprinting off after the Falcon. Everyone just stared at the scene in confusion and amusement.
Tony, once again, found himself laughing his head off as he leaned against the kitchen sink. Steve and Natasha just shook their heads, while Scott smiled innocently and kept drinking his diet Coke.
At that moment, however, Pepper walked into the kitchen, a smile present on her face as her heels click-clacked across the floor. “Good morning and Merry Christmas to you all!”
“Merry Christmas, Mrs. Potts!” Scott waved. “Oh, be careful by the way - mistletoe is legit everywhere. Bucky’s also running around trying to kiss Sam.”
“So I’ve noticed; thank you Scott!” Pepper smiled. “And hello to you, handsome.”
“Who, me?” Tony asked, pointing to himself. “Nah, must be someone else… sure Thor is around somewhere. Good morning kiss?”
“Hmm… no.” Pepper smiled innocently.
“What? Why?” Tony pouted.
“We’re not underneath any mistletoe,” Pepper said, pointing up, “so… it really just doesn’t fit the mood, doesn’t it?”
“Dammit,” Tony whispered, unable to hide the small smile that came to his face. “Peter, get in here and-oh yeah, he went off to go do something after he and Wanda kissed.”
“Peter and Wanda kissied!? And I wasn’t here for it?!” Pepper asked, gasping.
“Not to worry, Mrs. Potts-Stark, I recorded all the kisses for later viewing,” Friday said.
“Ah, ever the angel Fri,” Pepper said, relief washing over her. “So… you gonna get me under the mistletoe?”
“Depends on how hard you make it,” Tony shrugged.
Pepper giggled, before turning around, abandoning the cup of tea she had made while talking to Tony. “Well, in that case… come and get your kiss, then.”
And at that moment, Pepper broke out into a sprint, laughing her head off as she ran out of the kitchen - Tony just shook his head in admiration, before bolting after Pepper, laughing all the while.
As Steve and Natasha just smiled at the other couple, guess what Scott did.
Take a sip of his diet Coke.
(Outside, meanwhile, Bucky was now chasing Sam across the track, making kissing sounds and holding out his arms as Sam screeched like a banshee.)