Chapter Three
"Are you ready?" Marissa asked from her spot by the front door. Leila looked up from the loads of bag gathered on the floor next to her. Marissa had already called for Robin to come and help them get the suitcases into the car's trunk. Despite Leila's objection, Marissa still didn't listen and insisted on helping her.
"Yeah! I guess," Leila replied absent-mindedly whilst checking if something was missing from her luggage was messing. Somehow, everything seemed to be perfectly in place. It had been almost a week since that talk with David and she had finally made up her mind. Well, she had already made up her mind long ago. She just wasn't ready to man up and do it.
David didn't know about it. She didn't want to make him nervous. He was already so stressed from work - as she had heard - and he didn't seem to need any more trouble on his shoulders. Poor David, always working to save his father's company.
"Great!" Marissa exclaimed in relief. Leila watched dumbly as she and Robin went over to pick up her stuff and go out to load it in Marissa's white Honda. She watched them talking quickly from the window of Marissa's kitchen and then she realized she had been standing there in the same spot for the past fifteen minutes. Quickly, she ran out of the room and was immediately hit by a heavy surge of wind. Somehow, she had actually forgotten that they were still in winter.
"I can handle that," She mumbled and grabbed one of the bags from Marissa's grasp, dropping it into the almost-full trunk. They all moved back and Marissa raised her hand to slam the boot down, engulfing them in a misty cloud of dust.
Leila started coughing as they both got in the car. She slumped down in the passenger seat and laid her hand-bag on her lap as Marissa's said her goodbye. She came back and occupied the driver's seat with a heavy sigh, plugging the key in the ignition. The engine roared to life.
"Are you ready?" Marissa asked in a rasped voice as she continued panting. She shouldn't have allowed her to help packing.
It wasn't like she had a choice anyway.
"No!" Leila dared to say, her voice strong, unlike the usual.
Marissa leant over the steering wheel and turned her head to look at her, flipping her long ponytail to the side. "You know, if you don't want to, you don't have to. We can still unwind and go back as if nothing happened.
"It's not that simple," Leila started and Marissa rolled her eyes at her.
"You always say that," She interrupted. "Everything could be simple just if we handled it the right way. If you don't want to go, then don't. It is that simple."
"I love him," Leila admitted, her voice barely a whisper. Marissa huffed and dropped back in her seat.
Well, she did love him, even if that wasn't the real reason behind her decision. Her main priority right now was to keep receiving the money from her paychecks to help keep her Dad alive for as long as possible. But she still loved him. So, it's not really considered a lie, right?
Love doesn't always mean to go back. Sometimes it means to let go, The voice in her mind reminded.
Shut up, stupid mind!
"You don't really have a choice, do you?" Marissa's voice startled her, and she instantly cleared her throat. She wasn't sure if her voice wouldn't betray her at the moment.
She shook her head. "I guess not."
As a response, Marissa's hand gripped the steer-wheel, while the other one crawled to hold the clutch. With one swift move, the car was away from the curb and speeding through the highway.
As she was rolling down the window and resting her arm on its side, Leila's mind drifted again to her fabricated truth. She was supposed to stay until her father's life came to an end. She ignored the churn in her stomach as her mind reciprocated the future.
He will die. And then what?
What other excuse should she use to stay? She shook her head, dismissing that thought. Again, she was over-thinking the matter. At any moment now David could dismiss her and all of her hopes would shatter. She should get a grip, and prepare for the worst yet to come. But no matter how many times she had told herself that, she just couldn't help but internally freak out. She wasn't the kind of girl that was capable of handling rejection. She would shatter, and she knew it. But she couldn't do anything to change the truth. What was done was done and it was way beyond her power. She couldn't lie to him. He deserved the truth.
Her heart was beginning to constrict as the car slowly reached into the driveway of the house she had come to know very well. Looking up, she assumed that window of the tower belonged to David. She gulped when she noticed that the lights were on.
The metallic gates were closed as always. One guard stood up from the cabin at the corner and headed towards them. He exchanged a few words with Marissa before walking back to press a button that slowly unlocked the gates. Leila waited impatiently as the car slipped inside until it stopped right in front of the large, wooden front door.
"We're here," She announced and pulled the key out of the ignition after pulling the brakes. She let out a sigh and slumped down in her seat.
She glanced to look at Leila, whose hands were pulled into tight fists that her knuckles were white. "Are you okay?"
"Shut it, Marissa! I'm not the Olympics' trophy," Leila snapped out of uncontrollable agony and bolted out of the car, slamming the door behind her. Marissa smirked defiantly as she watched her friend march to the trunk to get her bags out.
Lazily, Marissa used her controller to unlock the trunk as Leila waited impatiently, her arms crossed over her chest. Her eyes were shooting daggers in Marissa's direction.
Leila's head disappeared inside the boot almost immediately, as she managed to pull out all of her stuff out of the car. She glanced up again at the lit room and she prayed that he didn't yet know of her arrival. She tried to push away the fact that the guard must have already informed him, but she liked to have the benefit of the doubt.
She internally cursed as her eyes lifted to see him standing in his balcony, his hands firmly gripping the railing as he watched her unpack. Once he realized that he was caught, he walked back inside, slamming the door behind him.
He is so not going to let me stay.
"There," Marissa called as she walked over, helping her with the bags. She tried to lift the mood after she noticed how David's glare burnt holes through the ground. She was even more surprised that Leila didn't flinch. She took it as if it was a light breeze of air against her forehead.
Damn those two! What was so wrong with them?
"Thank you, Marissa. You can go now," Leila stopped her gesture in a stern voice. Marissa looked up at her in shook. Did she just get dismissed?
"Are you sure?" She squeaked, worried as to how much fire would erupt if she left the two of them alone under the same roof for the next hour. She didn't want to think about it right now.
"Yes!" Leila replied, pulling out the stroller of her traveling-trunk and dashing to the front door. Expecting to be met with Emily's beaming expression as she ushered her in, her face desperately fell as the door opened to show her husband instead. And he didn't look so happy to see her.
She diverted her gaze to anywhere else but him. Leila didn't know what to say. Of all the scenarios she had thought of, that totally wasn't one of them. She hadn't arranged for meeting him just yet, let alone speaking at all.
Looking back behind her, Leila sought for Marissa's help. She hoped David didn't see her expression as she stared at her friend, regretting the way she had treated her that morning. Her face fell as she realized how Marissa completely ignored her plea. She plastered a wide grin on her face and raised up a hand to wave hello. She glanced back to see David return the gesture, mirroring her expression.
Apparently she couldn't even make him smile, but Marissa could.
Sighing, she looked down as she strolled past him and into the foyer. The marble floor was glistening under the golden light of the chandelier, and it erupted in loud noise as she stepped over it with her feet, dragging her bag to the room. She wasn't even wearing heels. What produced that loud sound?
She looked around her, nervously biting on her lower lip as she heard the front door close. Where was Emily when she needed her?
Surprisingly, she felt a tug at her hand and her head immediately snapped, to find David shoving her grip away from the stroller. He grabbed it by himself and started walking towards the staircase, pulling the trunk behind him.
But not before she heard him say; "Welcome home, Wife!"
- -
As Leila ascended the stairs in her state of utter shock, she prayed that David didn't invade her room and decided to stay over. She wasn't ready to face him yet. His presence made her weaker than usual, and she didn't know how she would handle it with him being around her more than often. She would totally slip and tell him the truth in some wrong way. She prayed to God that it never happened.
When she reached for her room, the lights were already on and the large, white-painted door was halfway open. From outside, Leila could still hear shuffling as he laid the bag down on the floor. She took a deep breath in order to contain her nervousness and pushed the door open slightly. He was sitting on the floor, cross-legged as he waited for her to come in.
Leila dumped her bags down lazily and stared at him as if he was some weird creature.
David looked up curiously from his weird stance. "What?" He asked. He never liked her silence. It made him feel worried. It was like the calm before the storm.
"What are you doing in my room?" Leila snapped harshly, surprised by her own voice. She didn't show it, though. It didn't matter wherever she was provided with such bravery, she didn't want waste it.
"That's technically my house. I can be anywhere," David attempted to joke, but she didn't take it. She was staring coldly at him, arms crossed over her chest. He knew she wouldn't let it go.
David sighed. "You see, I'm trying to start a new leaf. Last time we were in that position, you asked me to help with your luggage and I refused. Hence, it's why I'm doing what I'm doing."
Leila scoffed, rolling her eyes. "A new leaf?" She mocked, rolling her eyes. "Is that why you've been literally glaring fire at me when I arrived? Is that your way to say, I don't know, welcome back, or something?"
David sighed, running a hand through his hair. "God! I'm sorry, Leila. I didn't mean it like this."
For a second, Leila felt sorry for him, but she quickly composed herself and cleared her throat.
"I don't understand you, David," Leila rambled, walking to sit down on the bed, throwing her handbag to land somewhere on the mattress. "When I see you, I don't understand whether I should be happy or afraid. You're so confusing."
"I'm sorry," She heard him mumble again. Her head snapped.
"That isn't helping," She fumed, her nose flaring. "Your sorry doesn't change anything. No matter if you meant it or not, you're still doing it. I don't think I can keep up if you continue being so confusing."
"Damn!" David cursed and got up from his position on the floor. "I'm not prepared for that." He started to walk towards the door, but her voice stopped him.
"See? That's what I mean by confusing," Leila admitted in frustration. Now that she had had the chance, she was going to let it all out at once. "One second you're the charming, sweet guy who actually cares about me. The second you are an ignorant asshole who thinks I'm shallow."
David paused and turned around to face her. "I never said you were shallow."
At least not out loud.
"Should I be flattered now?" Leila questioned sarcastically. "Look! We're not even ten minutes into this and we're already bickering over nothing. You can't expect me to change when you don't even escort any effort in making yourself better, David. I don't have to deal with this insanity."
"No, you don't," David repeated, making her eyes go wide.
Did he just say what I think he said?
"What?" Leila breathed in shock. Did he really just ask her to leave?
"David, wait!" She called after him as David disappeared into the hallway. When he didn't reply she ran back out and followed him.
"David, what did you mean with that?" She demanded, panting. She stopped and leant on the well-decorated wall to catch her breath. On hearing her voice, David turned around to face her. He looked furious.
"I meant what I meant, Leila. You already know that," He growled. "If you don't want to stay, then just leave. I didn't threaten and demand you to stay. You don't have to keep up with my insanity anymore."
"No," Leila shook her head in disbelief. She had wanted him to change, not to let go of her. Apparently, she was of no value to him. "No! You didn't mean that?" She pleaded.
David nodded. "Yes, I did. Just go back to wherever you came from. I don't care," He demanded and started to walk away again from her. Leila blinked away the tears and backed away. Of course, that was what had been bound to happen from the beginning. She had expected that. She had said not to keep her hopes high, yet that didn't stop the tears from spilling.
"Thank you, David," She whispered with a sniffle and walked back to her room, wiping at her tears on the way. She rubbed her nose, internally scolding herself for being so childish. He would never care for her. He was never supposed to, anyway. He didn't choose her, and she didn't choose him. But while she was willing to get on good terms with him, he just kept pushing her away. And when she tried to admonish him, he never cared to understand.
When she returned to her room, she was thankful that her bags were still intact. She didn't need yet to back them again.
As she sat down on the edge of the bed, she pulled out her phone to dial her mother. She wasn't going to bother Marissa and disappoint her again.
At first, her mother used the same monotone to greet her and say that everything was fine with her father, but when Leila asked where they were staying, she started spluttering.
"Honey, is everything okay?" She warily asked, getting Leila to raise a brow at her question.
"I'm fine, Mom. I just wanted to pay you a visit," Leila replied.
"How about we come and visit you instead?" Samar offered and Leila started to panic.
"NO!" She practically yelled, but then managed to calm down. "No, Mom. It's not necessary. I just wanted to come and spend some time with you all, you know, if you're fine with that, of course."
Samar hesitated. "Well, I'm not sure about that," She said. "Your father asked me to keep your life on track. He is doing okay now, and when he gets better, we're all coming to see you again, okay?"
"But, why don't you just - ,"
"I'm quite busy now, Leila. I'll call you later," Samar said quickly and hung up. Leila swore as she dropped the phone to her lap and buried her face in her hands. What was she going to do now?
She couldn't go back to Marissa's. It would be very rude of her to invade on her privacy again. The Gareth's were of no choice, since Rosaline hated her, and John didn't approve of her, either. She didn't know anyone else in this town. If she left now, she would have to live in the streets. She had quit her job and had no money at all. She didn't even have enough for a plane ticket back home. Where could she go? Did David have an extra flat or something that she could temporarily use until she had earned enough money? Yes, that would do. She would ask to rent a flat and get a job for those few months until she had had enough money to leave. She would even pay for the rent. She debated whether she should ask her mother for a small loan, but thinking of her father, she felt as guilty as ever.
She got up from the bed and started to pace back and forth, rehearsing the speech in her head. It was simple. She would ask him if he had any available estates and explain the deal, only hoping that he would somehow understand. As she walked back out of the door, her hands were trembling in fear. That wasn't right. No woman should be that afraid of meeting her husband, right?
Taking a deep breath and holding it, she calmly knocked on his door twice, hoping he wasn't still angry at her, as that would down the chances of her offer getting accepted.
She didn't hear any noise from the other side. There was no sound of paper scraping or furniture shuffling. No sound of boots stomping or even the voice of David as he lazily said 'Come in'.
He might not be there, She told herself hopefully as she retorted away, happy that she didn't have to face him at the moment. It lasted for only one second before the door flew open and an angry-looking David was shown in the distance.
"I thought I had already ordered you to go," He groaned in a raspy voice, rubbing his eyes. His hair was disheveled as always and he was in a short-sleeved whit jumper and sweatpants.
Crap! She had clearly awoken him.
Who sleeps at this hour?
Leila nervously bit on her lip. "Well, that's the thing," She started, terribly going against her rehearsal. "I -, I have nowhere else to go."
"That's not my problem," He muttered accusingly and started to close the door when Leila interrupted him.
"Wait!" She called, holding her hand up. He looked bored as he stared at her, but he stopped anyway.
"I -, I have an offer," She stuttered nervously. "I need somewhere to stay at, just for a month or two maximum. I'll find a job and save for a flight back home. I'll pay you, I promise. Just say the number."
Her voice cracked and she didn't dare look up at him. If she were in his place she would laugh it off and slam the door at her face. She squeezed her eyes shut, expecting the wince from the door being shut, but it never came. Instead, she felt a warm presence near her and when her eyes opened, he was standing right in front of her.
Hesitantly, his right hand moved up to cup her cheek, the pad of his thumb caressing her wet skin. She shivered, and his hand immediately shot back. She raised her hand to wipe her cheek, internally cursing herself. She had been crying again, and she wasn't even aware of it until now.
"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have asked," She muttered quickly and turned away, bolting down the hallway, back to her room.
She closed the door behind her and let her body slide down to the cold floor. She covered her face with her hands. She had been so stupid, so childish, to think that he might actually help her. She laid her head down and tried to stop crying. She never saw David sitting down on the floor across from her against the other side of the door, sighing and running a hand down his face.
- -
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