"So, let's start from this side. I'm Mark, the oldest of this group! I'm sure you don't remember me but I taught you some knife-throwing skills-"
Since Jeno had woken you up, Hongjoong decided to let Decim introduce themselves to you before you left. Although you still felt a lot of pain in your arm and would've liked to stay under the care of Renjun, you couldn't bring yourself to disobey Hongjoong's orders.
"Was I as close to everyone else as I was with you, Jeno?"
"Not necessarily. You and I were close because we had opportunities to work together more often, but you do have some memorable moments with everyone."
You felt the same feeling of anxiety and uneasiness as you had felt when Seonghwa first introduced you to the members of ATEEZ. However, you undoubtedly felt more comfortable being around Decim - almost a comforting and homely emotion.
"You really weren't the best at it," San laughed, cutting off Mark's introduction.
"No, she was really good... she got it pretty much right away actually. Her aim has always been spot on."
Hongjoong glared at San as Seonghwa elbowed his arm. Decim knew you way better than them and definitely sounded more convincing about it. Hongjoong's guard had risen immensely which wasn't gone unnoticed by the members of his group. Even Jongho took notice of the slight shine of sweat building up on his leader's face.
You, on the other hand, lit up at Mark's words. Hearing his sudden praise had made you feel more confident in yourself and began to strangely trigger muscle memory as if your hands remembered the texture of the knives handle before you threw it at your target.
And it made you more confused about Ateez than you were before.
When asking Ateez about your past, they always seemed eerily unsure and paused between their words more than Decim. It was similar to comparing friends that knew you for years versus those you had met a couple of months ago; the way they would describe you would be very different.
"Anyway," another voice spoke up, "I'm Jisung. Unlike grandpa Mark here, I'm the youngest of the group. I didn't really know you much since I was recruited only a year ago."
"He's an asshole but you get used to it," Mark sneered as Renjun laughed into his sleeve.
An unfamiliar boy stood up as Mark and Jisung squabbled on the side.
"I'm Na Jaemin but you probably recognize me the most out of everyone here," he smirked, gently taking your hand and placing a kiss on the back of it.
You looked at him blankly, feeling surprised at his flirtatious behaviour. However, the feeling of his hand felt all too familiar, his touch lingering on your hand even after he moved his away.
All the boys of Decim hit his back as they groaned, pulling Jaemin back into his seat.
"(Y/n), are you really sure about telling Jaemin you like him?"
"Stop laughing Akio. Aiko said it was a great idea!"
Looking down at your hands, you tried to hide the blush that was growing on your heated face, "I think I remember you- "
"You think?"
Jisung laughed as Jaemin threw his head down, shamefully setting his head onto Jeno's shoulder who absentmindedly shrugged it off. You let out a small laugh as you watched Jeno ignore Jaemin.
Jeno's eyes met yours as a smile grew onto his face.
"I guess that means I'm up then," he spoke, standing up and making his way towards you. "I'm Lee Jeno, and I used to be the closest one to you in this group."
As Hongjoong's stare turned cold and Seongwha readjusted his position, as if ready to stand up, the rest of Ateez realized how much their leaders disliked Jeno. The poor boy never did anything but he cared for you far too much. While the others cared for you nonetheless, they knew they had a debt to owe to Ateez which Jeno was close to forgetting.
"Nice to meet you Jeno," you replied as the two of you continued to smile at the other.
You felt comfortable seeing these boys as their smiles made you feel as if you were home again.
Hongjoong cleared his throat as he readjusted his shirt, "alright let's move on. Who's next?"
Looking up at your leader, you couldn't help but notice the awkward stances of the Ateez members. Jongho was looking to the side while Yeosang kept glancing at Wooyoung who also seemed to be acting differently.
"Well you met me today," Renjun spoke from his seat, waving at you, "I'm the medic in Decim and I taught you some things just like Jongho."
"I didn't even know that I could help with medical stuff," you admitted, turning towards Hongjoong.
Before he could explain, Yunho quickly stood from his spot, "you do! But you just messed up some stitches once so Hongjoong doesn't let you anymore..."
"Thank you for explaining, Yunho," Seongwha acknowledged, "but you didn't need to stand up to say that. Please sit down."
San tried to hide his laugh alongside Yeosang while Yunho sat back into his seat, heat growing in his face.
"And last but not least, I'm Chenle! I'm with Jisung in the 'not knowing you very well' category. I joined a couple of months before him but I only met you once before he did so... yeah."
You smiled at his shy and awkward composure. While the rest of the members seemed more confident in themselves and their roles, he still had a childlike innocence to him.
As Seongwha stood up to speak, you couldn't help but get lost in your own thoughts. After every member of Decim introduced themselves you felt a wave of familiarity hit you; new memories opening every second. It was as if their faces and names finally completed a puzzle-piece of moments related to them.
"Renjun what does this drug do?"
"(Y/n) that's not something you should just play around with, put that down!"
"Jeno, catch it!"
"Come on guys, please that one was expensive and illegal!"
You couldn't help but smile sweetly at the thought that these boys were those that kept you happy through your childhood; those that you played and laughed with.
"So, what do you say, (Y/n)?"
You snapped out of your thoughts as your head turned to Seonghwa. "I'm sorry, what did you say?"
He sighed before explaining, "while you were daydreaming, I announced our plan to leave tonight as we were assigned an important midnight mission by our head offices. We do worry for the wound in your arm but we can't ignore orders from our higherups."
"She can stay here with us," Mark rebuttaled.
Seonghwa sighed but before he could speak, Hongjoong spoke up, "I'm sure you know and understand why we can't do that. You do, don't you?"
"I wish I could but I'm just questioning your morals here. Even your father had always claimed that Ateez was the most loyal group there is; sacrificing anything for the safety of your members. Why are you willing to sacrifice (Y/n)'s safety now?"
If looks could kill, Mark would be dead. Hongjoong glared daggers at him as his eyebrows furrowed in anger. He couldn't just say, "she's not an actual member of Ateez," and Mark knew the vulnerable situation they were in.
Decim were having fun and Hongjoong didn't like it.
"I do understand your worry for her," Seonghwa stood, speaking up for his leader, "but even you all couldn't refuse an order from your bosses. I hope you understand where we're coming from."
The room was filled with noticeable tension. Every member of both groups eyeing each other if ready to fight at any moment. You watched the members in confusion as you couldn't understand what the issue was.
"I'm fine to leave... if anything I could sit out on this one."
"See," Yunho began, "even she says it's okay. Case closed then."
Standing from his spot with Seonghwa following suite, Hongjoong looked towards all the members, "pack up your stuff. We're leaving in an hour."
You sat in the quiet room that Decim had allowed you to stay in while you were there, the faint light of the sun peeking through the white blinds.
Jeno sat across from you, watching you play with your necklace.
He didn't know what to say to you, and you to him. He felt too guilty for playing into Ateez's lie, keeping you prisoner with people who didn't even know you.
"Jeno... am I actually a member of ATEEZ?" you asked him slowly.
The boy visibly stiffened as he continued looking at the small piece of jewellery in your hands. His eyes shift before he replied, "of course, (Y/n)."
You let out a shaky breath as you braced yourself for what Jeno could possibly say. You couldn't help but feel that Ateez weren't familiar and you didn't want to get sent away with them after feeling so safe with Decim.
"Please," you started, "Jeno, be honest with me. After meeting the rest of the members of Decim... everyone just seems so familiar. I can see everyone's faces in the memories we shared. I remember when you and I laughed at Chenle for getting his arm stuck in the revolving doors. I remember when you lectured Jaemin for flirting with another girl in front of me. I remember all of you and your faces but I can't remember anyone from Ateez. All I can see are bodies with blurred faces like when I finally see them, I'll remember everything.
So why the hell can't I remember anyone from Ateez?"
Jeno's heart sank as he heard your vulnerable voice, cracking from frustration and confusion. His eyes widened as he looked up, only to be confronted by the tears forming in your reddened eyes. He knew he didn't want to lie to you. If there was anyone in the world he cared for the most, it was you.
"Jeno, does Jaemin have a girlfriend?
"No, why?"
He remembered when you showed interest in his flirtatious group member and knew that you would get your heart broken by him, just like any girl. But he didn't want to stop you. He always saw the way your eyes sparkled when you saw Jaemin and he didn't want to take that away.
But he also remembered the way you laid beside him, crying after Jaemin had tried to politely reject you. He knew he could've prevented your sadness and he never forgave himself for not protecting you beforehand.
"(Y/n), I know you're scared but Ateez are people you know..." he paused before he continued, knowing he couldn't say much. Although Hongjoong never made it obvious, Jeno suspected the leader of Ateez would always be around. "I want you to remember what I said before, about joining us whenever you feel neglected or unsafe- "
"But I feel unsafe now! You wouldn't have said that if there wasn't something you needed to protect me from," you exclaimed.
Jeno sighed, closing his eyes and avoiding yours before he continued, "I'll come to get you whenever you call me. You're safer with Ateez, (Y/n). I think you just feel overwhelmed because you saw everyone again after such a long time but your group is Ateez. At the end of the day, you're safest with them."
You and Jeno sat in silence as you tried to organize your thoughts. You were upset and conflicted but felt too weak to yell or cry any longer.
"If you trust them," you began, your voice wavering as you inched towards him before wrapping your arms around the male in front of you,
"then I do too."
Jeno couldn't stop the tears forming in his eyes. He couldn't hug you back knowing that he was aiding in Ateez's twisted plan.
"Don't tell Ateez you remember us as much as you do."
You rested your head on his shoulder, "I know, I won't."
On the other side of the door, Jongho hands unknowingly turned into fists as he walked to the attic. He never thought anything when your room door was slightly left open. He only wanted to see if you needed some help; maybe wanted some emotional support.
Hongjoong and Seongwha were the only ones seen in the Attic as the young boy stood in front of them, questioning whether or not he should tell them what he had heard.
"She remembers them."
Seongwha sighed, "I suspected it. Alright well, we'll deal with it if it brings up any issues. For now, just focus on making her leave."
"I'm curious though," Hongjoong smirked, "why are you telling us? Is it because your girlfriend doesn't seem to like you as much as you do her?"
Jongho looked to the side, objecting to any teasing remarks Hongjoong said to him. He didn't know what brought him to tell his leader. He didn't like the feeling. Walking out of the room, Jongho felt waves of guilt crashing onto him; he was someone you could trust and Jongho was always on your side. So why was he trying to expose you?
"I think he's jealous," Hongjoong laughed.
Packing their bag, Seonghwa looked towards the broken door that was slammed by the boy, "jealousy can be a powerful emotion. Very manipulatable."
The eight of you stood outside as the members of Decim were helping out bags into your car. You didn't quite know how to feel. There was an emptiness in your heart and you couldn't determine why. You didn't want to leave Decim... it felt like moving away from a childhood home.
But you knew you didn't want to upset Hongjoong as he was already in a horrible mood.
"Alright, everything's ready. (Y/n), everyone, get in."
Looking back at the six boys, you gave them a small smile before climbing into the vehicle behind Jongho. You looked back, catching Jeno's eyes. Before you had left, he gave you a small flip phone to call him.
"Are you alright?" you heard a voice snap you out of your thoughts.
Looking towards Jongho, you felt bad as you noticed his worried eyes, "I'm fine...
It was just a long day."