The girls were trailing behind Cass and I as we walked down the road, the passes practically glued to their necks like they were afraid it would blow away in the warm wind of Adelaide.
“Blair?” I stopped short as a familiar, frightened voice said my name. It was the little girl who looked to be 11, her blonde hair blowing in the wind.
“Yeah?” I asked with a grin spread across my face.
“I’m kind of scared…” She grabbed my hand and we both began to walk ahead of the group. She looked so vulnerable, the type of girl that got bullied at school. I gave her hand a little squeeze.
“Don’t be scared, sweetie.”
“But what if I mess up my words? What if they think I’m ugly?”
I looked down at her sharply as those words stuck something in me. “Hannah,” I began, feeling relief flood through me as I remembered her name. “You are not ugly. Not by a long shot, okay? You are gorgeous, and Ryan, Ian, Jamie and Nash will see that. And so what if you muck up your words? They’ll think it’s adorable.”
She contemplated my words for a little bit. “Okay,” she said smugly, and she began to walk a little faster with a skip as a result of her excitement. Was this what it was like to have a little sister? I wanted to be able to take care of someone like this. Hell, is this what it’s like having a daughter? I smiled at the thought of having someone I could call my own, someone with my eyes and who understood me. One day, Blair…
We arrived at the doors and I turned to the ten girls before knocking. “Okay, so we might have a few rules that you have to follow,” I started.
“First of all, be calm. Don’t just jump on them and scream in their faces. Oh god, I sound like I’m warning little kids about the zoo.” I brought my palm up to my face. “Look, just have fun, alright? Without being bitches to each other, because that would just ruin their night. Promise?”
“Promise,” a few of them said in unison, their Australian accents sounding more awesome than usual. I nodded and knocked on the door.
“Who is it?” a familiar voice said.
“Open the door!” I whined, and the handle slowly turned and the door opened to reveal Ryan standing there. He was wearing blue jeans, which he’d always complained about being too tight, and a white button up shirt with a black bowtie. Over that, he had on a red blazer that was buttoned once at the front. I looked him up and down before nodding my approval and walking inside with hyperventilating girls behind me. Ryan kissed my cheek, and I smiled as I heard more smooching sounds. He was doing that to everyone that walked in, even Cass. These guys sure knew how to treat their fans.
“Hey Blair,” Nash greeted as I walked by him.
“Hi,” I said sweetly, giving him a little wave before turning around and standing next to the stage, lifting my elbow to rest on it while I waited for the guys to greet everyone. I couldn’t help but chuckle at the looks on their faces, they looked completely astonished. I suddenly imagined what it’d be like for me to meet the boys, without having the history I have now. I would probably be a lot worse than this, crying and my nose would be running like crazy. They’d think I was silly, to cry over them. But seeing all these girls faces and how Hot Chelle Rae brightened up their day, I couldn’t help but think I would have felt that way, too.
* * *
“Bye girls!” The four boys said in unison as they waved at the 10 people walking out of the back. The girls looked disappointed to finally leave, but I’m sure they’d be happy with the hundreds of photos they took. Most of the time they called over to me to take the photos, but a few of them wouldn’t get a photo without me in it. I’d posed for the photo and they’d usually asked me to kiss Ryan’s cheek, as both of us were always on the outside with the fan in the middle.
“Bye!” The girls replied, and Ian shut the doors and slipped his sunnies off of where they were resting neatly on the top of his head.
We were in a small room that led onto the stage. Nash, Jamie and Ryan strode over to a large couch placed against the back wall, the wall that separated the stage from where we were now, and slumped down onto it, automatically taking out their phones. I laughed at the gesture that they all did at the same time, and they looked up at me. I sighed happily and watched as Ryan got up and dropped his phone on the couch. He walked over to me, and bent down to grab me and pick me up. He twirled me once and then sent me down, still managing to make me feel dizzy -- not so much from the spinning, but from the closeness.
I giggled as he left his arms around my waist.
“So… We have about half an hour before the concert starts, what do you wanna do?” He asked, leaning down to rest the bridge of his nose on my forehead.
“I don’t know, what do you wanna do?”
He exhaled comically, his breath tickling at my lips. “The things I want to do won’t be appropriate in front of these people.” He leaned back and gestured to the guys and Cass. I laughed and brought him back forward.
“Ugh, please don’t,” Cass groaned, slouching down where Ryan had left. Right in between Nash and Jamie. I was expecting them to look at her, stare her down until she made a decision, but they automatically looked at me.
Jamie’s look was desperate, kind of like he was pleading me to save him. His short fringe fell into his eyes, and he flicked it away, which broke our eye contact. I looked over to Nash, who was also looking at m pleadingly. He mouthed words to me, they looked a lot like ‘get me out of this.’
My mind geared into action, and even if that wasn’t what Nash had said, I had to do this anyway.
“Hey Nash, come here. I have to… uh… talk to you,” I said calmly, surprised that the gesture wasn’t awkward in anyway.
He shot up straight away and walked right up to me. I turned on me heels and went somewhere that no one could hear us. Once we were safely hidden away, I turned back to him.
“What was that look for?”
“I… I don’t think I can do this with Cass,” he stuttered. I gave him a look.
“You what? Don’t you dare hurt her, Nash.” I knew my eyes were hard, but he didn’t seem to realise.
“It’s not her or anything… I just feel that I'm hurting Jamie. He’s like my own little bro, I can’t do that to him.”
I considered it for a moment, and then realised Nash was just taking care of Jamie. As the youngest in the band, that kid had some serious protection. I sighed, exasperated. “I’m sorry for snapping at you. It’s sweet that you’re all looking out for him.”
“It’s cool, Blair.” Nash’s eyes suddenly went cold. “Just don’t do it again.”
I froze. My eyes were practically bulging out of their sockets and I could feel heat rising to my cheeks.
He burst into laughter. “Come on, I’m totally kidding!” I close my eyes and breathed a sigh of relief before opening them and ramming myself into Nash. We both stumbled backwards and just before we fell, we turned to walk towards the others. He put his arm over my shoulders and brought me close.
“You know, you’re pretty alright Blair,” he muttered cheerfully.
I looked over at him and raised my eyebrows. “Glad you approve,” I retorted, slipping out of his arms when Ryan and Ian reached us. I looked back at Nash to see a smirk on his lips. I was really getting used to having these boys around, and heading back to Nashville without them might be a small problem.
Ryan grabbed my hand and led me over to the couch, where Jamie and Cass were conversing. He sat down and pulled me onto his lap so that I was sitting sideways.
“How do you like Australia?” He asked.
“It’s… amazing,” I answered, my voice becoming breathy. I swallowed. “I kind of wish I could live here, in Adelaide. It’s weird that I feel at home here.”
“Yeah, I get that feeling a lot. Especially Venice, still shocks me how beautiful it is.”
“Is it that good?”
“Better.”
I smiled up at him and snuggled into his chest. “So what about you? How do you like Australia?”
He chuckled, and I could feel his chest rise and fall with his steady breathing.
“I love Australia, always have. It’s so… it’s just a great place. The fans here are amazing, their accents are hot, and they’re always so dedicated.”
I lifted my hand up to brush it past his cheek. It was amazing how I was used to doing such an intimate action. About a month ago this would have been beyond my wildest dreams. “It sucks that we have to leave in a few days…”
His eyes suddenly shifted over every inch of the room, making sure to avoid me. “Yeah, a few days…-“
“Okay! Let’s get this show started!” A strong voice bellowed from just behind the curtain. Ryan leaped up, almost throwing me off completely. What’s going on with him?
“Go into the line with these,” Ryan shoved two more passes in my hand, these ones were different though. Once I’d looked them over and was about to look back up at him, he was already jogging away from me.
“Ryan?” I called out. He turned around.
“Yeah?”
His face was so hopeful, like he needed to do the fans from Adelaide proud as it was the last show. I couldn’t ruin a concert by demanding what was wrong with him, it would be completely wrong.
“Uh, good luck,” I smiled, nodding my head to make sure he knew that’s what I was meaning to say. He returned my smile and took a few steps forward, cupping my face in his hands. He leaned down and kissed me gently, then pulled away to kiss my nose.
“I love you,” he whispered.
“I love you too.”
He turned away and headed towards the stage entry, giving me once last look and blowing me a kiss before stepping onto the stage with a microphone being placed in his hand by a stagehand.
* * *
I had to admit, I was almost used to the feeling of being squished by violent and aggressive teenage girls. Almost. We were about halfway in the line, a few girls that we’d given passes to had let us in front of them in an act of thanking us for what we did. Of course we’d accepted, we did know them in person, but we still wanted a great spot at the concert. It was the adrenaline rush that it gave me, giving me that thrill that I’d always thrived for in my life.
The line surged forward, bringing me back to reality and bringing to my attention that Cass was talking to me.
She looked at me expectantly. “Sorry, what?” I asked, shaking my head.
Cass rolled her eyes. “I said, we should sneak into the back before the concert ends, so we can meet up with the guys.”
“Oh, yeah, that should be fine, right? I mean, these passes look pretty special to me.” I reached down to lift it up from where it was hanging around my neck. HOT CHELLE RAE was printed in bold letters, and underneath that was a picture of them. Right at the bottom it said ‘Manager Pass, All Stars Access’ and when you flipped it over there was a number. Mine was number 5, and Cass’ was number 6.
A girl shoved into me, her shoulder jamming into my back.
“I’m so sorry!” She exclaimed, her voice going high and tears forming in her eyes. “I’m claustrophic,” she added when I gave her a concerned look.
“Oh, shit, are you alright?” I asked.
“Yeah… just a little dizzy… I feel a bit sick too.”
“Do you want water?” I got out a bottle from Cass’ bag and handed it to her. She looked like she wanted to refuse it, as if taking our water would be rude, but I could tell her stomach thought otherwise. She grabbed it and unscrewed the lid, lifting the bottle to her lips and taking a small sip. After warming up to the idea of cold liquid rushing through her body, she took a large swig, and then another and another. Before she realised, the bottle that was half full when I gave it to her was now empty.
She pulled it away from her lips and wiped away the small ring of water on the top of her lips.
“Thank you so much, I feel a little better now.”
“You’re welcome. If you need to sit down you tell me okay? I’ll take you somewhere.”
“Thanks, but even if you did, I wouldn’t want to go. I have to see my idols,” the girl said proudly. I smiled, she was a girl that hadn’t been backstage with us. “If it gets too much then, you’ll tell me? Then maybe I’ll take you backstage or something if you miss out. Deal?”
“Deal,” she said, and held her hand out. I shook it, but while I was letting go she was shoved into me again.
“Hey!” she yelled to the people behind her. There were murmured apologies and then we were moving forward again, this time at a faster rate. The doors were a few metres away, and I was just turning the corner to face the glass sliding doors that girls were fighting to get through.
“They’re like animals,” Cass hissed in my ear, her tone savage. I shrugged and trudged forward.
A few minutes later we were at the doors and I showed my pass to the man who was scanning tickets, hoping this would get us through like Ryan said. He nodded and directed us to where the hall was, although we could already tell by the swarm of screaming girls heading towards it.
“No running!” A security guard screamed, which caused all girls to halt, and then continue at a slow speed towards the doors. Once they were past her, however, they began to bolt as fast as they could. As Cass and I walked into the room, the curtains were just opening. We began to run towards the large crowd forming, and screamed and shouted thrillingly when the HCR bear appeared on stage. He was wearing the shirt, and I couldn’t help but wonder if it was one of the boys like it usually was. There were no opening acts for this tour, it was just Hot Chelle Rae. I knew they would wait until all of the girls were inside to start, so the bear was just a delay.
About 10 minutes later, the drum rolls began and lights began to flash everywhere in the room, except on the stage. I could make out 4 figures moving onto the stage, but they weren’t clear enough to be more than just figments of my imagination.
* * *
I walked up to the doors, only one security guard was around this one. Although I understood why there wasn’t two, this guy was twice the size of a normal person. And not overweight either, just complete muscle. Cass trailed behind me, finding it hard to squeeze her way out of the crowd of girls. The concert hadn’t ended yet, like we’d planned, and no girls could notice us. The guys were at the stage of throwing things out into the crowd, which meant no one was leaving anytime soon. We approached the guard and held out our passes, and he gave them a glance over before nodding his head and opening the door.
“They’ll be done in a few minutes,” he grumbled, obviously not happy about his job. I smiled at him, hoping it would cheer him up a little.
“Thanks!” I skipped into the small room that I had come out from about an hour ago, making my way over to the couch. Cass stopped me halfway.
“Wait,” she said, grabbing a hold of my arm and pulling me back to stand next to her. “Something doesn’t feel right.”
“What?” I grabbed her hand and broke free of her grip. “That’s crazy, Cass. We’re the only ones in here.”
Cass shrugged, a wary look on her face. “If you say so.”
I grinned and looked down at the pass around my neck. “Can you believe this? A month ago we wouldn’t have even dreamed of this happening.”
This brought a smile to her face. “And you’re dating Ryan Follese. This is amazing!” She grabbed my hands and we both jumped up and down, screaming at a high pitch that we were used to.
“Speaking of dating…” I trailed off. “Nash and Jamie.”
Those 2 names made her eyes turn sad. “I knew we’d have to talk about this sometime.”
I sighed. “Cass, what are you doing? You’re going to hurt them both if you don’t make up your mind.”
“I know!” she shouted. She then lowered her voice. “I know…”
“Look, tell me which one you’d rather be with, it’s that simple.”
“But I don’t know which one I would rather be with, that’s the- ”
“Jamie.”
“I… what?”
“You should choose Jamie. They way he is around you, Cass. The way he looks at you, it’s completely adorable. And Nash talked to me today…”
“He did?”
“Yeah. He said he didn’t want to hurt Jamie, so-“
“Blair!” Cass screeched, looking at something behind me. I felt all of the blood drain out of my face at the sudden shock. I whirled around, expecting to see a rather large spider, but instead saw a man wearing a black balaclava. He reached out to grab a hold of me, but I ducked under his arms.
“What the hell!” I screamed, running over to the other side of the room. Cass was being left alone, cluing me in that this guy was only after me. “Get help or something!”
“I won’t hurt either of you,” the man said, the voice very familiar. I racked my brain to find out who it could be, but he launched himself at me.
He grabbed me by the shoulders, causing me to stumble backwards and hit my head against the wall.
“So much for not hurting me,” I mumbled to myself. As a reflex of someone attacking me, I kicked my legs out hoping to strike him. I felt my toes hit his kneecap, which caused him to move backwards a bit, but the real shot was when I kicked his shin and his legs collapsed. I took the chance to get away from him, shoving him onto the ground and dodging his outstretched hands trying to grab at my feet. I thought I was away from him, when suddenly he grabbed my ankle and pulled me down. I lost my balance almost instantly and fell onto my hands and knees, but he dragged me backwards. I was then flat on my stomach, squirming to get out of his hold.
“Get off of her you prick!” Cass shrieked, lurching forward and knocking him to the ground again. He made a sound filled with anger and flipped Cass onto her back, him sitting on top of her and pinning her down.
I groaned. My head hurt and every movement I made was complete agony. There was a sickening crack and I snapped my head around to see Cass bending the man’s left wrist backwards. It was at a very unnatural angle, and he was screaming in pain. I was surprised the entire crowd out there couldn’t hear us. And that’s when it hit me. This room wasn’t soundproof, I could hear everything still going on outside. I filled my lungs with air.
“Help! Somebody help us!” I shrieked as loud as I possibly could. It was deafening, and Cass and the man both looked over, astonished that such noise could come out of my mouth. The man got up abruptly and came to cover my mouth with his broken wrist, while pulling a cloth out from his jacket pocket. Oh god, he’s going to suffocate me.
But he was going to do something a whole lot different.
He shushed me with a finger to my lips and poured liquid onto the cloth, holding it in his palm and swinging it around to rest it over my nose and my mouth. I squirmed and squirmed, but there was no escaping from his body weight on top of me.
I began to make small groaning noises of discomfort, but I suddenly smelt the toxins that were on the cloth. Chloroform.
I couldn’t scream, I couldn’t even breathe. Every time I inhaled, a hot streak of pain seared through my throat. The coughing started after not getting enough fresh oxygen, but before I knew it my eyes were becoming heavy and my body felt light. I closed my eyes just as the man whispered something in my ear.
“It’s for your own good, Blair.”