I am dragged upstairs, my feet stumbling over one another as I quickly climb up the stairs. Harry's grip on my wrist never loosening. We dodge past most couples making out in the halls and a line of people waiting to use the restroom. They stare at us mysteriously as Harry opens a random door and pushes me in, not caring if everyone saw us. The lights flicker on and I take a moment to look around the room.
There is a large bed placed in the corner of the room, a dresser on the opposite side of the room and a large closet beside the dresser.
"How can you not expect me to give a fuck about what those assholes say about me when they're right in front of my fucking face!" Harry snaps me back into reality and I turn around to face him, his jaw is locked and his nostrils are flared. "It's a lot harder than you think, Ariana!"
"You didn't need to be that rude to Mark!"
"He was being a dick to me!" He fires back.
"He didn't even speak to you!"
"He made fun of me!"
"And why do you care? I thought you didn't care about anything, Harry." I huff, lowering my voice and crossing my arms over my chest.
"I care about something's..." Harry says, taking three steps closer to me as I take three steps back.
"Like what?" A small grin is played on my face and I can tell the tension between us is dissolving and we are no longer angry at each other.
"I care about, my dog, my mum, my job, my education..." Harry mumbles, a smile spreading across his face as he brings both of his hands to either side of my face. I keep on walking back until my feet hit the bed and we fall back, Harry's body on top of mine.
"You don't even have a dog!!" I laugh and mimic his actions by placing a hand on his cheek and outlining the heart shape of his soft lips.
"I know. But you didn't let me finish." Harry bites back a smile.
"Okay, what else do you care about?"
"I care about my apartment, my family, my friends..." Harry inches his face closer to mine, his lips brush past mine but I pull back; wanting to get a reaction out of him. "and most importantly.... you." He leans into me again but I place my finger over his lips.
"So romantic, Harold." I tease, poking the dimple carved into his cheek.
"Ariana?" Harry clears his throat and finally supports most of his weight with his elbows parted on either side of my head.
"Yes?"
"Please kiss me."
"No."
"Why not?"
"Because...." I trail off, staring past him.
"Are you considering on kissing me when the clock strikes 12?" Harry asks, a smirk played on his lips.
"Only if I am in the mood to kiss you, Harry."
"You're always in the mood to kiss me."
"I know." I say. I know it's true though; I can't get enough of him.
"Then why don't you?"
"Because friends don't kiss as much as we do."
"That's bullshit. Why aren't you mine already... we could do so many things, have no worries.."
"We both know that's not how things work between us."
"What, why?" He begins to climb off of me and I let him. I sit up and cross my legs beneath me as he crawls over to the corner of the bed and sits, his legs stretched out in front of him.
"Because we're always fighting, Harry. We can never have 'no worries' because things just don't work like that."
"Why not? We can be happy and we can kiss all day if you want." Harry takes my hand in his and plays with my fingers.
"We would do a lot more than just kiss." I say and Harry looks up at me, a smile spread across his face and his eyes lit up as if he is excited.
"Oh please," Harry laughs. "Anyways... why do you hold back so much? We both have feelings for each other, why don't you just agree to be mine?"
"Well you've never asked me.."
"Fine then. Ariana Grande will you be my girlfriend?" Harry asks, hope is expressed on his features.
"It doesn't work like that!!" I laugh and hop off the bed.
"Where are you going?" Harry begins to stand but I stop him.
"Calm down. It is New Years Eve, right?" I wave both vodka bottles in the air and he smiles widely.
.
"Tell me a secret." Harry placed his hand over mine, comparing the size of our hands.
"What?"
"Tell me something you've never told anyone else."
"I know what a secret is, Harold." I say, pressing the beer bottle to my lips. Harry and I have been up here in this mysterious room for about three hours, having numerous amounts of different conversations. Once we ran out of alcohol to drink, one of us would have to go down and get more. One of the vodka bottles was demolished within minutes and we both agreed to save the other for midnight.
"Just tell me something."
"Okay..." I tap on my chin, thinking of the best secret to tell Harry. "I haven't seen my parents in two years."
"Why not?" Harry stares deeply into my eyes. Pupils dilated and green orbs basically searing a hole through me.
"Let's just say we don't get along..." I gulp down more of the beer and pass the bottle to Harry. "All they care about is what other people think about them and their money. Remember how I told you that my parents separated when I was younger?" I ask him and he nods. "Well a very long time ago, my mother called me only to say that she has been seeing my father again, I mean my dad is a pretty nice guy besides his drinking problem but I got so pissed off. Not so much at my dad but my mom for letting him jump back into my life like that." I feel a weight lift off my shoulders from my confession.
"Wow," Is all Harry manages to say. "That's fucked up."
"I know." I sigh. "Now you tell me a secret."
"Um... I've never trusted anyone as much as I trust you, Ari. Not even my mum." My heart swells at his confession and I smile up at him. "But that's not the point." He shakes his head and sits up straight.
"My point is that you're the only one that truly knows the condition I am in," Harry blinks multiple times, breaking eye contact from me and looks down at our hands.
"What do you mean?"
"You're the only one who knows I am fucking sad, Ariana." Harry snaps, releasing my hand from his. He takes a few deep breaths and takes my hand in his again, playing around with my fingers. "Niall knows too, he found out when we shared a dorm and we had a talk and all; he tried getting me some help but I was an asshole and I shut him out for so long. But you, you're the only one who really really fucking knows me." Harry breathes, possibly holding back any upcoming tears.
I place my hand over his and lift his chin up to look at me. "And you're the only person who knows me," I gulp. "the real me." Harry smiles widely and pulls me on to him, our lips immediately connecting.
I felt a shock through my whole body as he pressed his lips to mine. They lingered there for a moment as if he is enjoying the soft feeling of our lips pressed together, before our lips finally begin to move slowly. I love everything about this moment, the way his lips moved ever so slowly around mine, the way every emotion seemed to crash down onto us that makes my heart swell and my stomach tighten, the way his hands are firmly placed on my hips, the way the kiss is no longer filled with want, but need for us to be closer.
"I love..." Harry says in between kisses. "Ariana, I really fucking love y-" Harry says and I feel my breath being caught in my throat and my stomach tighten impossibly tight.
"What?" I gasp, pulling away from the kiss to hear the beautiful words escape his lips. "Harry what did you just say?"
"Um... I really fucking love your lips." Harry scratches the back of his neck, as if he is biting back the true words he is meant to say but too afraid to say them. I know he didn't mean to say that he loved my lips, I know what he really meant and it makes me awfully upset that he doesn't say them because I know I feel exactly the same.
"I-I really love your lips too." I say, blinking away the tears and ignoring the pain in my chest. I crawl off him and sit on the opposite side of him, my legs crossed beneath me.
"What's wrong?" Harry asked, nervousness evident on his features.
"What do you mean?" I sighed.
"Why did you stop..."
"Stop what?" I ask, already knowing his answer before he even has the chance to say it.
"Kissing me. Why did you stop kissing me?"
"Maybe because I am not in the mood to make out with you, Harry."
"Okay..." Harry responds after a few beats of silence.
After about another hour of drinking all of the alcohol we promised not to drink till midnight, I am absolutely drunk and Harry is only a bit tipsy. He definitely has a higher tolerance for alcohol than I do. Harry makes an endless amount of jokes as we wait for the clock to strike midnight. Most of his jokes are not funny but I can't help but laugh at his childish and adorable behavior. I lay beside him, his arm draped over my shoulders as I lean onto him, my head resting on his chest as his head rest on mine. Harry takes my hand in his only to play around with my fingers like usual. He wiggles them around and gently runs his thumb over each of the white polished nails, the action repeating an endless amount of times before he makes the final decision on intertwining our fingers.
I feel my eyes getting harder to keep open as we lay in complete silence, the only noise to be heard is the thumping music from downstairs. I am surprised nobody has walked in on us yet and I would like to keep it that way. It feels incredible to be laying beside Harry, even if we are not sleeping, it feels amazing to be cuddled up into his arms and just silently enjoy each other's presence.
"Daniel," I break the silence and wait a few seconds before continuing. "Daniel Summers; my first."
"What?" Harry's voice is full of concern, not one bit of judgement.
"My high school crush, Daniel Summers. He was my first." I say, feeling my heart ache just a bit and regret.
"Why?" Harry sits up, he uses the headboard for support as he leans his back against it.
"Do you really want to know all the details?"
"Yes, uhm, never mind. But why, him?" Harry asks as if he knew Danny.
"I had a huge crush on him when I was 17 and we were good friends and he had feelings for me too." I gulp, not wanting to finish the rest. "Well one day we went to a party and we got drunk, I mean really drunk to the point when we can't feel our own damn limbs. He was driving me home later on that night but we ended up making a quick stop to his house..."
"Okay!" Harry shouts, rubbing his temples as he takes all this given information in. It takes a few minutes for him to let it all sync in until he finally nods for me to continue.
"Harry, please remember that I was your regular stupid, hormonal teenager. I am not like I used to be," I chug down more of the second bottle of vodka to gain some confidence. "Anyways, he invited me inside because he said it would take a while so of course I gave in and came into his house. Then after a while, we were talking and just having a good time at his house. He had me so convinced that he had feelings for me, I was head over heels for him after all, then out of nowhere we were kissing and all... and it happened." The haunting memories of his body hovered over mine floods my mind, making me absolutely sick. I feel my stomach churn harshly in my abdomen as it all came back to me, the regret, the pain, the memories, him.
I do not exactly hate Danny himself, but I hate every damn memory of his hands on me, the way his lips remained on my neck as he rolled his hips, the way he laid me down for the first time in my life. It was all my fault, I knew that from that moment I should have saved it for someone I possibly love. "And I hate myself everyday for it, I regret it all, I really do Harry." A single tear streams down my cheek but Harry does not notice it.
"It's okay." Harry's voice is defeated, as if he is disappointed in me for letting someone take something that is only mine once. His breathing slows after a while and for once I am actually convinced that he is actually asleep from the way his chest slowly rises and falls. "Rose White, my first girlfriend."
"Nice name. Give me the deets," I roll over onto my stomach and face him, my chin in the palm of my hand.
"She was my first girlfriend, my first kiss, I liked her; fuck I really did, but she dumped me to date this jock." Harry painfully laughs as he remembers the girl his heart once belonged to. "My second girlfriend, Ashley, she was a wild one actually. I sorta liked her at the moment and I guess she had feelings for me too but all she ever wanted to do was kiss." Harry gulps down the rest of the beer bottle in his hands and makes a sour face as he gulps. "One night, we were in my dorm room and she went way too touchy, like all she wanted me for was for the bragging rights or the pleasure."
"So you have... played around with another girl before?" I bite on my nails and continue to stare at the beautiful man sitting before me.
"Not exactly. Like I said before, I've had my fair share of kisses but I've never gotten intimate with someone. Anyways, that night in my dorm was fantastic but horrible at the same time, we were making out and shit and out of nowhere we began undressing each other and I was really nervous because I've never done that kind of shit before. So then she took off my pants and all, and she was basically naked and I still had my boxers on and we were still making out on my bed and then things started getting way too heated. I immediately stopped and she was so pissed off about it she cussed me out and slapped me before she left." Harry laughs and crosses his legs beneath him.
"Wow," Is all I manage to say. "what a whore." I roll my eyes and pick at my nails.
"Ariana are you jealous?" Harry's voice is childish, playful even.
"Pfft, never." I let out a wisp of a laugh and Harry smirks.
"Whatever you say, love." Harry laughs, staring down at his hands as he runs his finger over his metal ring. Harry stays quiet for a couple of minutes, his smile fading and his eyebrows knitting together as he deeply sighs. "I don't know what is it, Ariana, but I've never felt this before."
"Felt what?" I roll over and sit up, my legs crossed beneath me as I sit up straight. Harry and I sit so close our knees are touching.
"This." Harry waved his hand between us and I felt my heart skip a beat. I do not know if it is the fresh alcohol in my system but the thought of Harry feeling something for me makes me a lot happier than it should. Everything seemed to pile up in an attempt to destroy me as butterflies burst into my stomach. I found it so hard to believe that he felt the same way about me. I couldn't ignore the inexplicable pull to him despite all the reasons I shouldn't, the belief that he was far too good for this world, and the intense desire to be the one for him to share the burden of all the responsibility he carried. I wanted to be the one he could lean on when he felt like he couldn't make it, and I wanted to help him realize what an incredible man he really was. He was completely oblivious to how he actually was that it killed me to know that he was hurting inside, he did not deserve any of this. I felt my chest hurt and my heart swell whenever I thought of this man, he has such a major effect over me; there was definitely some sort of feelings I had towards him I have never felt for somebody before and I knew that I could never lose this man, it would tear me down and rip me to shreds if anything ever happened to him. There was definitely something, between us that made us spark. Possibly love?
"Exactly." I replied, not finding it very important to say it after such a long time staying quiet.
And this is how the next few minutes went, having numerous amounts of different conversations over and over. The smile on his face never fading at the least. The mood light and happy, mostly because we are both wasted and we could not find anything to argue about at the moment. The clock is minutes away from striking twelve, the realization of spending my New Year with Harry making me very excited and happy all at once.
"We should proooooobably go downstairs to celebrate." I slur, party hiccuping. I am drunk, a little past tipsy but I am not completely wasted. But Harry, he is just a bit tipsy but it looks like he can drive us back home after tonight.
"There's probably no room, besides there's about five hundred people here, there's no way we can find Elizabeth and Jason in..." Harry pulls out his phone from his back pocket and quickly checks the time. "three minutes."
"Three minutes? Holy shit the year has gone by way too fast, it feels like I met you so long ago but it's only been a few months. How is that even possible?" I say, standing from the bed and helping him up.
"I don't even know, but let's just say that 2014 was a shit year for me."
"Really? Why?"
"Let's just say that if it weren't for you, things would be a lot different..." Harry shoves his phone back into his pocket and stands above me.
"Yeah right,"
"Really! You changed my life, Ariana!"
"And you changed my life, Harry. Like in a good-" I begin to ramble on but all of a sudden, the chanting of hundreds of drunk people from downstairs quickly shuts me up.
"15.."
"14.." They all loudly chant, the noise probably heard from a mile away. Excitement for the New Years makes its way to me and seconds later I chanting along with them, holding Harry's hands in mine and encouraging him to be as excited as I am.
"Are you ready!!" I shout, shaking him a bit and he smiles widely, nodding.
"10... 9... 8... 7.." My heartbeat quickens and I feel the alcohol finally make its way to my brain, making me feel nauseous and excited all at once.
"3..." I laugh and shout as Harry begins to chant along with me, a wide smile spread across his face and his eyes brighter than ever.
"2..."
"1..."
"Happy New Year!" I shout from the top of my lungs, several giggles escaping my lips but are cut off by the amazing feeling of Harry's lips crashed onto mine.
I am caught off guard at first but I quickly catch along by wrapping my arms around his neck to pull him closer to me. The warmth of his lips pressed against mine creates a fire between us I never knew existed. I feel my body go limp as his soft lips slowly move around mine, the feeling of being connected with him again is completely indescribable. My heart pounded in my head as his lips moved ever so slowly over mine. They were so incredibly full, soft and warm. And I needed more.
Harry was a bit more forceful this time, the plumpness of his lips wrapping around my bottom one. The action repeating with my top lip, the feeling absolutely exhilarating. Just those few seconds had been erotic, leaving us both breathless for a while. And once he slipped his tongue into my mouth, I was done for.
His sexy aura, his lean toned body, his wild hair, his smooth skin, his masculine smell, his deep voice, his hot breath, his hands holding my hips, it was all too much. It felt like I was slowly melting away in Harry's arms. Everything about him was so astonishing and incredibly beautiful. I felt my knees go weak, finally giving out on me as I leaned my body against his, our chest rising and falling in unison. He was quick to rescue me by holding onto my arms to support me up, his arms wrapped around my back as he slowly walked backward, my feeling following.
He laid me onto the bed, his lips never leaving mine as he settled over me his elbows on either side of my head, his muscles bulging out of his arms as he supported all of his weight. I could tell the kiss was no longer sweet and innocent as I felt Harry's devilish smirk spread against my skin. He only disconnected his lips from mine to sponge them onto my cheek and my jawline, slowly moving down the length of my neck. My fingers tangled themselves into his thick locks and slightly pulled on the roots when his lips touched that overly sensitive spot on my neck, a moan seizing to escape from my lips and finally breaking through as I felt every violent swipe of his tongue against my collarbone, every suck of his teeth, everything slowly lighting me on fire. "You're so beautiful, Ariana." Harry said, his thick accent adorning the deep of his voice wonderfully.
I slowly began unbuttoning the first top buttons of his white dress shirt, thinking it was the right time to as his hands roamed my body. I pulled his hair a bit harder to force his lips back up to mine, once his lips met mine again, I pulled his bottom lip between my teeth. A deep moan broke through Harry's lips, at that I felt a bulge through Harry's tight jeans. I was proved right when he pushed his hips towards mine, slowly moving his hips to the rhythm of the kiss.
Before our actions proceeded further, though, there was a noise. And not the sounds of Harry and I, but something else. Harry must have heard it too because he broke away and turned towards the door of the room. And we both saw him.
Jai.
-
WOW THIS IS ALL I CAN SAY WOW THIS WAS SUCH A LONG CHAPTER AND THE CLIFFHANGER IS JUST SO BDOSBDLABDLABDPD
LIKE I SAID THINGS ARE GOING TO GET GOOD IM SO HAPPY IM FINALLY AT THIS PART AFTER SO SO SO MANY CHAPTERS OF STALLING IM NOT EVEN SORRY FOR LEAVING YOU GUYS HERE I REALLY HOPE YOU ENJOYED THIS CHAPTER BECAUSE I HAD SO MUCH FUN WRITING IT SO IT WOULD MEAN THE WORLD IF YOU LEFT ME A VOTE AND COMMENT 💘 :D
I hope your week was great and be happy because tomorrow is Friday and then the weekend!!!
I love you all so much thank you for 7k reads I am so grateful for it all :') THANK YOU I HOPE YOU HAVE ANOTHER WONDERFUL WEEK AND ILL SEE YOU AGAIN ON THE NEXT UPDATE OF CLUELESS 💘