AUGUST P.O.V.
“August, you know I love you man, but I have to be honest. Your mouth is going to be the death of you and your relationship. I understand you hurting man. What he did to you was wrong. And you have every right to be angry. But you have to understand that Amber is not the person you should be taking that aggression out on, especially if as you say, she’s the only person in your corner. Words can sometimes do more damage than actions. Choose em’ wisely man, no matter how angry you are.”
The words Dr. Edwards said to me echoed in my ear as I realized what I had said to Amb out of anger. I didn’t mean that. I knew the child was mine, but I for even a second, wanted to make her feel my hurt. But I had to tell myself this is not the way.
“Amb.” I opened the door. She was headed to her car, and she ignored me.
I ran after her and caught up as she made it to her car. I stood in front of her driver’s side door.
“Amb I’m sorry. That was wrong. I ain’t mean that.”
“You never do August. You never do. Yet I always forgive you and this one time I mess up, you can’t even hear me out. If you want a divorce, fine I’ll give you one.”
“Mommmmmmyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” A3 ran up to her and reached out to hug Amber.
“Hey Auggie.” She picked him up and squeezed him tight.
“Mommy you coming home today?”
“Nah I can’t baby.” She kissed his cheek.
“Why?”
“Mommy working on a big project.” She flew him in the air like a helicopter he laughed hard.
“Mommmmmmmmmmyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” Sata ran outside up to Amb. Her and O.
She put A3 down and hugged them both.
“Mommy just in time to do my hair for school. Because daddy sucks.”
Amb laughed. Sata pulled her into the house and the other kids followed behind her.
I went inside the house and saw Amb in the living room doing Sata’s hair, while A3 and O discussed with her the new facts they had learned.
I walked passed them and went upstairs, closing my bedroom door. I quickly grabbed Amb’s bra I laid on the pillow beside me and put it in the draw. I haven’t slept without being next to Amb in about six years since we started living together. And it was hard for me to get adjusted. The smell of her perfume was the only thing that remotely relaxed me and allowed me to eventually drift off to sleep.
Why did I go to Wes with a gun? Because I will kill any nigga who comes after my wife. Despite what we going through, Amb was still mine and no other nigga was going to have her but me.
Did I want a divorce? No.
Why’d I tell her that? My ego. I want her to have that fear of what it would feel like if she possibly lost me. Because she’s never been in that position.
Was I missing her? Like crazy bruh and it hasn’t even been that long.
I got out of my daze and got ready for work. I came downstairs to see Amb had fixed breakfast, and the kids already had their uniforms on, that I ironed.
“It’s plenty left for you. Want me to fix your plate” She asked me.
I was hungry as shit, but I didn’t want her to know I wanted her cooking. So I just went in the fridge and got some yogurt and sat down with the kids. That was my answer.
She sighed got some containers and just put the excess food in there, then put it in the fridge.
“Auntie Amb what happened to your car?” O asked her.
“Somebody busted out the windows while I was inside I-Hop eating.”
“Oh no mommy!” Sata said concerned.
My protective husband instinct starting kicking in and I was going to ask her why she didn’t call me, but then I remembered I was being an idiot and threw my phone in the pool. And I was so mad, I probably would’nt have picked up anyway.
“Sorry about that Auntie Amb.”
“It’s okay baby. Auntie’s good.” She smiled at O.
“Mommy can you ride with us to school?” A3 asked her from the table, eating a piece of his jelly biscuit.
“I don’t know Auggie, you gotta ask your daddy.”
“Pop-Pop can mommy ride with us to school?”
Amb looked at me, I avoided her gaze. “I don’t care Auggie.” I said non-chalantly, looking out the window.
We all finished eating and went to the car. We got in and the ride to school was primarily silent except the kids talking to each other in the back. When we arrived at the school, Amb walked them in.
I called Sneak to tell him I was going to be a little late. He said okay and that was alright, because the patient cancelled anyway. We hung up and Amb made her way back to the car.
“Where are we going?” She asked when she realized we weren’t going back to the house.
I didn’t say anything, I just turned on the radio.
“You are unbelievable August you know that.” She shook her head then looked out the window.
We pulled up to where I wanted to go.
“Get out.” I told her.
She got out and we went in.
“Hey guys, I’m Jim. What are you folks looking for today?”
“A new car for her.” I said.
“Great. Did you have anything in mind or I can show you what we got in our inventory?”
“You got something in mind?” I asked Amb.
“No.”
“Just show us.”
“Alright, right this way.”
I was still mad as hell, but I’m not finna leave my wife out like that. He showed us around the lot, eventually Amb saw a BMW she liked.
I told the man to put everything in her name and he did.
“Gimme the keys to the rental, I’ll have Sneak take it back.” I told her as we walked to her new car. She gave me the keys. We made it to the car, I opened the door for her.
“August I really didn’t sleep with him. I swear on my life.” She said looking in my eyes.
“What would make you be around another man period?”
“I don’t know August. I just…I was getting fed up with us not communicating. I was getting fed up with being disrespected. And I guess he was there.”
“So you go to somebody else instead of coming to me?”
“August, you and I both know you are not welcoming with open arms when it comes to hard conversations. You tune me out or are quick to angry. But that’s still no excuse. I am sorry baby from the bottom of my heart, I was completely wrong. And I just want us back together. My vision was clouded but its not anymore.” She tried to kiss me, I turned my head and removed her hands from my face.
"You don't want to be married anymore?" She looked in my eyes tearing up.
“Enjoy your new car.” I handed her the key and walked away.