<OST: Winter Flower - Younha ft. RM>
"Now, talk."
Jieun stared up at Jungkook with a defiant look on her face. "Talk about what?"
Jungkook folded his arms, cornering Jieun into the corner of the dark dressing room. "Speak."
Jieun frowned and raised her voice. "About what!"
"Why you're doing this to me!" Jungkook swallowed hard as he looked down at Jieun. "Tell me why."
Jieun turned away to avoid Jungkook's gaze. "I don't know what you're talking about."
"Why you said those things to me last night," Jungkook finally said, his voice breathy and he spoke. "Tell me why... please."
Jieun forced herself to slowly meet Jungkook's eyes. "I already said enough last night, and I apologised for that earlier, what more do you need from me?"
Jungkook shook his head and let out a cynical scoff. "Your apology earlier was no apology."
"Then what do you want me to do!"
"I said explain-" Jungkook repeated, sounding like he was suppressing his emotions as much as he could. "Explain why you said those things to me."
"No explanation-" Jieun lied, forcing herself to maintain eye contact with him. "It just slipped out of my mouth."
"So you meant it then?"
Jieun stared up into his eyes that begged her to say 'no'. She knew she shouldn't give in, but she really wanted to be selfish for once. "No."
"Why did you say it then?"
"I told you-" Jieun took a deep breath. "It was just a slip of the tongue."
"People don't say such things with a slip of their tongue," Jungkook pointed out, unable to believe her. "There must be some truth in what you said."
Jieun didn't know how to respond. He was right.
"So tell me-" Jungkook leaned in a little, his eyes never leaving Jieun's the entire time. "Do you genuinely want to see me recover, or are you just doing all this so you can be done and be rid of me once it's all over?"
Jieun pursed her lips as she looked up to meet Jungkook's eyes once more. "Why does it matter so much to you?"
Jungkook ignored Jieun's question. "Answer me."
"Fine, ignore everything I said last night, okay?" Jieun uttered agitatedly. "I genuinely want to see you recover."
"So you were lying to me last night then."
"I didn't lie, I-"
"Then you must be lying to me now."
"Jeon Jungkook!" Jieun finally exploded, completely frustrated with how Jungkook was acting towards her. "Must you really be like that? You don't even know what I'm going through, you don't even know how I feel! Must you really keep questioning me like I owe you a living? You said awful things to me as well, but I didn't even retaliate? How would you feel if I acted the same way around you? You don't even know how I feel... you don't even know..."
"I don't even know what?" Jungkook's voice was dangerously soft as he took a step forward, cornering Jieun against the wall and surprising her with the sudden lack of distance between them. "Tell me then, Lee Jieun. Tell me - what do I not know?"
Being all alone with Jungkook in the dark room, Jieun could feel her resolution to keep up the act crumbling a little by little. Maybe if she told Jungkook now what he really didn't know about her, that she was a reporter and that all this while she had come close to him just to get more information about him and Jennie... but that she regretted it and wanted to be by his side for real now... Would he actually buy it? Would he accept her for who she was? Would he take it calmly? How would he react? Jieun was terrified to take this chance, because she knew how much it'd cost her...
It would cost her... him.
"Why should I tell you?" Jieun said defiantly. "If you're not gonna accept my explanation, I have nothing more to say to you. You told me to disappear anyway and so did gamdong-nim... so you know what? I'll leave - not just today, I'll leave this job, I'll leave your house, I'll leave your entire life. Are you happy?"
Jieun gave Jungkook one last angry look before shoving him backwards with both her hands. But before she could leave, she felt Jungkook grab her by the arm, spinning her around at once. Jieun closed her eyes in fear as she was shoved roughly against a table, causing some things from the table to fall around her with loud noises. She opened her eyes just as Jungkook slammed his palm onto the wall right next to her face, causing her to flinch a little.
"No-" Jungkook uttered, his face just inches away from Jieun's. "If you're asking me whether I'm happy that you're leaving... no - no, I'm not happy."
Jieun inhaled sharply, feeling their breaths mingle in the musty dressing room. How was she supposed to react? This was so sudden... and she already felt all her emotions getting out of control...
"Let go-"
"Don't test my patience, Lee Jieun!" Jungkook finally yelled, his voice reverberating through the room. "Don't test me!"
Jieun froze in her place, absolutely stunned.
"You're right-" Jungkook said after calming down a little. "I don't know what you're going through, but neither do you have any idea what I go through on a daily basis. You have absolutely no idea at all."
Jieun held her breath as Jungkook backed away from her a little.
"I myself have no idea why I'm like that," Jungkook confessed with a sigh. "After all, I've never felt this way before... I- Since last night, after you said those things to me, I'll admit - I felt hurt, I wanted to hurt you back with my own words - the same way you hurt me. But seeing you in such a miserable state, I just simply couldn't focus- I don't know, I felt the urge to give in but at the same time, I didn't want to... Is it anything to do my pride? And that's why, you always make me feel so angry, so hopeless, so cluelsss about what to do... I don't know why I'm like that... I- I don't know why-"
Jungkook glanced up at Jieun, completing the sentence in his head. I don't know why I can't get you out of my head.
"Can't you just be honest with me... for once?" Jungkook pleaded sincerely, his voice cracking a little as he spoke. "You know full well how I can't stand liars the most."
If lying had a human form, it would be Jieun. Her entire existence next to Jungkook was just a lie.
"Sometimes people lie for a reason though-" Jieun avoided Jungkook's eye contact. "A white lie, they call it."
Jungkook shook his head. "A white lie is still a lie though."
"What about you then?" Jieun questioned. "Can you be 100% sure when you say that you've never lied in your whole life...?"
Jungkook pursed his lips for a few awkward moments. "Yeah."
"See? Even now, you're lying."
"I have no idea what you're talking about."
"You and Jennie-" Jieun blurted the words out without even thinking. "I know the two of you aren't really dating."
Jungkook took a few steps backward in complete shock and horror.
-•-•-
"Blind date?!" Byulyi screeched as she jumped up from her bed and almost stubbed her toe against her bed frame. "No, but - for like, what? Mom! Why did Dad set me up on a blind date without even asking me for my opinion?"
"Well..." Byulyi's mom sounded more cautious than usual. "He said you're kinda getting old, and you still don't have a boyfriend... he's afraid... that, you know... you..."
"What?"
"That you'll be left on the shelf."
"Ouch."
"But Byul-ah!" Byulyi's mom carried on, now trying to convince her not to resist it. "Listen - I know it sounds bad, but your father actually makes sense! Think about it, you're almost 30, the nature of your job scope is such that you hardly have the chance to meet a good guy, so if you've never met anyone over the past few years... it's unlikely that you'll meet him in the next few years too. Do you wanna be single forever? No, am I right? So just pack your bags and come home - we have just the right guy for you."
The words slipped out of Byulyi's mouth before she could stop herself. "How do you know I don't meet any guys?"
An awkward silence.
"Wait... you actually meet guys?"
Byulyi flinched. Why did she even say that? Just because she interacted with one guy for the first time in like... five years? Was she really that proud of it? Considering the fact that the guy was someone whom she barely got along with too?
"Huh?" Byulyi let out a nervous chuckle. "What? No. I meant that... Yeah, I don't meet any guys, but how did you know that?"
"Look at you-" Her mom scoffed. "You have time to pick up my call within seconds! You must be very free. I doubt you even have any friends apart Jieun-ie... What guy? You must be kidding!"
Byulyi found herself strangely annoyed by her mom's mocking chuckles. "It's not that I don't have game, Mom! I'm just choosing not to, okay? Once I put myself out there, I'll be the hottest thing out there."
"Hottest thing out there?" Byulyi's mom laughed mockingly. "Please. When are you putting yourself out there then?"
"Now's just not the right time-"
"Forget it!" Her mom clucked her tongue agitatedly. "Your dad already has everything prepared for you, I promise you won't be disappointed."
"How are you so sure?"
"Junghwan-ie! Junghwan-ie from your childhood, do you still remember him?"
"Junghwan-ie?" Byulyi furrowed her eyebrows. "Who's that?"
"Tsk- Sandeul-ie! You called him that since young, remember? The two of you used to be best friends!"
Sandeul. Of course, how could she forget?
"Sandeul-ie?" Byulyi frowned. "I haven't talked to him in a long time... but yeah, of course I remember him! What about him, though?"
He was her first love, how could she not remember?
"He's the guy your dad set you up with!" Byulyi's mom chirped happily. "Your dad met his dad a few days ago at work and their entire family just moved back here to Bucheon a few weeks ago!"
Byulyi froze, her eyes widening in shock. "Wait... Wait, wait, wait... hold on a second... My dad- You're telling me, the guy my dad set me up with is... Sandeul-ie?!"
"Yeah, why?"
Byulyi's heart was about to combust. Sandeul, her first love, whom she didn't have a chance to confess to because he moved out of town...? That same Sandeul...? She was going on a date with him?! She hadn't seen him in close to 20 years and now she was finally going to meet him? In such an awkward setting...?
This was insane.
"Hello? Hello? Byul-ah? Are you still there?"
"Yeah, Mom! I'm still here!"
"So tell me..." Byulyi's mom finally sounded hopeful. "Are you coming home next week? You are... aren't you?"
Byulyi swallowed hard as she finally made up her mind, her heart racing at a million miles per hour. "Yes, Mom. Yes, I'm coming. I'll be back next week."
-•-•-
"Wait, how did you know?"
Jieun didn't mean to blurt out the fact that she already knew about Jennie and Jungkook's fake relationship, but in the heat of the moment, it was pretty much unavoidable. There was no turning back at this point - it was all or nothing.
"I suspected at the beginning..." Jieun admitted. "Then everything became so obvious. She knew nothing about you, and you knew nothing about her. The way you acted around each other was awkward, not like how a real couple would act."
Jungkook's jaw dropped. "So you knew this whole time? When exactly did you find out?"
"When I found out that your favourite perfume had a citrus scent. I bet you don't even know Jennie-ssi has an allergy to citrus scents, do you?"
The blank look on Jungkook's face was sufficient to tell Jieun all she needed to know.
Jieun pursed her lips as she glanced at Jungkook cautiously. "It was so blaring that even someone as blur as me could not miss it."
Then it was a long awkward silence as Jungkook took a few steps backward and took a seat on the couch in the corner of the dressing room.
"You're right," he finally said after a long pause. "You're right... I lied too. I'm a hypocrite after all, ain't I? Hating people that lie but being the biggest liar myself."
"Hey..." Jieun's heart softened as she took a few steps towards him and hesitantly took a seat next to him on the couch. "Hey, don't say that."
"It's true though, isn't it?"
"Everyone lies," Jieun said softly. "I lie, you lie, Taehyung-ssi lies, Jennie-ssi lies, Seokjin-oppa lies... everyone does. Even when we don't intend to, sometimes we still cannot avoid it. That's the way life is. And I know you hate liars - that's one of the things you can't stand most on this planet, and that's okay. But just like how you have a reason why you lied to the world about you and Jennie-ssi, other people have a reason too."
Jungkook glanced up at Jieun slowly.
"Don't get me wrong - I'm not saying lying is in any way okay-" Jieun carried on. "But perhaps sometimes, a white lie is better - if it is for a good purpose."
Jungkook was silent for a while, before he finally spoke. "Do you know what my purpose is?"
"I don't know," Jieun admitted. "But I don't think you'd do it if you had a choice... am I right?"
"Mm-" Jungkook sighed as he looked down at his hands on his lap. "It's my company. They told us to do this."
Jieun swallowed. She knew it.
"What's your reason then?" Jungkook turned and looked at Jieun once more. "Whether you're lying to me now, or you lied to me last night - what's your reason for doing that?"
Jieun was stumped. "I..."
"You do have a good reason, do you?"
She did have a reason, yes. But whether it was a good reason... Was it really a good reason? If hiding the truth from Jungkook was the best way she could protect him from having his feelings hurt, perhaps... perhaps, that was a good reason - well, it was a good enough reason for her, anyway.
Jieun nodded slowly. "Mm. Mm, I do."
"It doesn't matter then, in that case-" Jungkook carried on hesitantly. "But tell me one thing - in this case, are you still planning to leave?"
"Well-" Jieun paused as she glanced at Jungkook. "Do you want me to?"
Jungkook pursed his lips and looked away. "I lied earlier too - I don't want you to leave my side. I don't want you to disappear. I said all those things because I was upset, I don't actually want you out of my life but if you still want to, I-"
"I won't go," Jieun said, a huge smile spreading across her face as she heard Jungkook's words of affirmation. "If you don't want me to go, I won't go. I'll stay by your side, Jeon Jungkook. I'll be there for you when you need me."
And she truly meant it.
"Oh, really?" Jungkook couldn't hide the smile on his face either, except both of them couldn't see exactly how bright each other's smiles were because of how dimly lit the room was. "Okay then."
It was silent again.
"I'm sorry," Jieun finally said after some time. "Sorry for saying those hurtful words to you."
"It's alright..." Jungkook said as he stole a glance in Jieun's direction. "And me too, I'm really sorry."
Jieun was surprised by just how easily the word 'sorry' came out of Jungkook's mouth as compared to the past. She smiled a little. "It's alright."
"Can you just promise me one thing?"
"Hm?" Jieun raised her eyebrows. "What?"
"I know that there can possibly be many white lies a person has to tell in his or her life-" Jungkook pursed his lips. "But can I request that... you don't keep anything from me from now? If there's anything you have to tell me, please just do."
Jieun stared blankly at Jungkook for a few moments. In the dark, his eyes still sparkled, as if pleading Jieun to agree to his requests. She wanted to make that promise with him so badly, but there was one thing she could never ever tell him. And the only way she could do that was to quit her job and bury it all... and make sure he never ever found out about it... like, ever...
"Can you promise me that?" Jungkook repeated once more, his eyes still glued on Jieun. "Of all people, I just hope you could be someone I could trust, for a long time. Could you do that? Can I really trust you?"
Thump. Thump. Thump.
Jieun didn't know what was the right thing to do. In her current position, she no longer had any idea what was the best solution - a solution in which both her and Jungkook could have their happy little ending. All roads just seemed to lead to a dead end, but it was something about the way Jungkook was looking at her in that moment, something that made her want to just say yes...
"You can, Jeon Jungkook. You can trust me."
And now, she had to live up to her promise.