Monday dawned chilly but sunny and Eloise Nott woke late, the meager light filtering through the lake doing nothing to dispel her exhaustion. Thanks to the Easter celebrations the day before, she hadn't started on her school work until late and the result had been a frankly depressingly late night filled with more Defense Against the Dark Arts homework that she had thought it was possible to have.
Of course, despite how late she'd been up, Lavinia still hadn't been in bed when she'd fallen asleep. That girl studied too much, in Eloise's opinion. But it wasn't really her business and she knew only too well the kind of pressure Lavinia faced at home. Eloise faced it too, especially now that she and Thomas were an item. Her job was to keep him, as if she didn't have enough incentive to do so without her parents reminding her. And in their opinion, there was no better way to keep a man than by demonstrating one had every admirable quality. Eloise privately thought there were plenty of other ways to keep a man, not least of which was showing him love and affection, but her parents didn't need to know that.
Allowing herself a private smile at that thought, Eloise slipped out of bed, glancing over at the only other occupied bed where Lavinia was still sleeping. Keeping her steps quiet with the ease that came from several years of practice, Eloise washed her face, brushed her hair and got dressed before descending the stairs out of the room. She met Thomas in the Common Room and, taking his hand, allowed him to escort her to breakfast.
"No sign of Vin?" asked Thomas as they made their way down the dungeon corridor towards the Entrance Hall.
Eloise snorted. "Well yes, but the sign says 'I'm sleeping' in big red letters with 'you're dead if you wake me' as the subtext so..."
Thomas laughed at that and Eloise smiled, glad of his mirth. Lavinia's crazy sleep schedule was a bit of a running joke with their group and her perpetual absence at breakfast, though normal, almost never passed without comment. Still, they did always make it funny and it was nice to start the day with a good laugh.
"We'll see her later, though," Thomas sighed, suppressing a yawn.
"Yeah, in the library," Eloise agreed sardonically as they made it up the steps to the ground level.
Shaking his head and smiling, Thomas didn't argue and the two sat down side by side at the Slytherin table to begin loading their plates for breakfast. A few minutes later, the hooting of owls and rustle of wings announced the arrival of the morning mail and Eloise glanced up more out of habit than anything.
She was slightly surprised to see her family owl swooping down from the rafters but, assuming it was probably just slightly belated Easter greetings, she laid a napkin over her arm and held it out to give the bird a place to land. Though a lovely, graceful bird most of the time, the poor creature wasn't very good at settling on flat surfaces and had more than once skidded to a halt rather than dropping down more gently. Indeed, the creature gave what Eloise decided to interpret as a grateful little hoot as he perched on her arm. As soon as she'd untied the letter from his leg, the great grey beast leapt up and returned to the air, as impatient as ever to take to the skies where he didn't have to worry about stupid things like where to put his feet.
"What's that?" asked Thomas, taking a pause in devouring his bacon to glance at the parchment in his girlfriend's hands.
"Probably for Easter," Eloise said with a shrug, picking up her knife to slit the envelope open. "It was odd they didn't send something yesterday," she added, almost offhandedly. It had indeed been odd and it had bothered her more than she would ever let on. Her parents had never missed a holiday or birthday before and when the post hour had ended at dinner that night, Eloise had felt a vaguely sick sensation in her stomach..
But when she unfolded the letter, Easter wishes, though present, were clearly not the focus of it.
Dear Eloise,
We hope you had a good holiday at school and we apologize for the late owl. Yesterday we were informed by Rhea Selwyn that her daughter, Lavinia, who we understand to be your friend, has abandoned her family. This disgrace, obviously, is not to be tolerated and the girl has been disowned by her parents and grandmother. In light of this development, we regret to inform you that you must keep your distance from her. Given the tenuous nature of the current political atmosphere, we cannot risk any association with blood traitors such as the Selwyn girl. We will not remind you again.
All the best,
Your Parents
Eloise sat back, slightly stunned even as an owl landed in front of Thomas, no doubt bearing similar news. Lavinia had abandoned her family? That wasn't very specific at all, but Eloise had a few guesses at what it really meant. If there was one thing Eloise had learned about Lavinia Selwyn after knowing her for over ten years, it was that Lavinia would never have betrayed anyone she cared about.
As if on cue, a blonde head became visible at the corner of Eloise's vision, just entering the Great Hall. Lavinia's eyes locked on to Eloise, flicked to the letter in her hand and then back up to the stunned expression Eloise couldn't seem to hide. There was a moment of understanding and Lavinia gave a soft and pained smile, taking a deep breath before turning around and leaving the hall.
For all that Eloise wanted to call after her, she was glad she didn't because no sooner had Lavinia disappeared from view than Thomas finished reading and looked up, glaring around the room as though expecting to find the girl standing there.
"How could she do something like that?" he demanded, turning to look in shock and anger at Eloise.
"What did your parents say she did?" asked Eloise, slightly confused by the vehemence in his tone. She knew he had no pity for blood traitors usually, but this was Lavinia. She was their friend. It seemed to her it should take more than a single line in a letter to make them condemn the girl.
"That she left. Just vanished in the middle of the night," he explained, shaking his head in disbelief. "And they gave her until Easter to come back but she didn't."
Eloise sighed, tapping her fingers absentmindedly on the table. That, she knew, was as good as renouncing the family name out right. You didn't leave. You didn't walk out. The only person they knew of who had ever dared do such a thing was Sirius Black. And he didn't really count.
That she'd had the option to come back and hadn't made it worse. She hadn't just been pushed out. No, she'd made a choice. An active, intentional choice. There was going to be hell to pay for this, Eloise knew.
"But how could she?" Thomas demanded again.
Eloise shook her head, shock still blanketing her thoughts. "Something else must have happened that we don't know about," she sighed.
"Yes but... but you don't just leave," he insisted. There was an almost pained edge to his voice that hurt to hear.
Eloise felt her shoulders fall. She didn't have an answer to that. At the end of the day she thought Thomas might be rather right at least there. On the other hand, she knew Lavinia was also well aware of the consequences of such actions and would never have taken such drastic measures without a very good reason. Not that she was going to make that argument to Thomas. She loved him but he was traditional and she knew that to him, leaving your family behind for any reason was a betrayal of the worst kind. Besides which, Eloise's parents were right. It made Lavinia a blood traitor. So she said nothing and they finished the meal in tense silence, neither one knowing what to say as their thoughts were dominated by this latest, insane news.
Later that day, while Thomas was in the library working on the Charms essay which Eloise had already finished, the brunette sought Severus out. She knew no one was going to send the poor kid a letter and she would rather he found out from her than from Thomas or someone else who might immediately expect a vehement dismissal of his friend. Better for everyone's sake that he was prepared for when it inevitably came to that.
She found him in the dungeons, pouring over his potions book, as usual and entered the empty classroom, knocking on the open door as she passed it so she wouldn't surprise him. He jumped slightly at the sound and turned to see who it was, raising an eyebrow when he saw her.
"Hey El," he greeted with mild surprise. "What are you doing down here?"
"I came looking for you actually," she started, not entirely sure how best to go about this.
"Oh?" he asked, prompting her when she hesitated.
"I got a letter," she began again. "This morning. Thomas got a similar one and... um... " She sighed, tapping her fingers on the other elbow. "Apparently Vin left home over the Christmas holiday," she explained, wincing slightly as the words came out in a rush.
Severus blinked at her, evidently nonplussed. "And?" he asked.
Eloise sighed, frustrated. She really didn't want to have to explain this, didn't want to have to say these words out loud. But he had to know. He had to understand and prepare accordingly. "She left home," she clarified. "And this makes her a blood traitor," she added, spitting the phrase out with distaste. She saw several emotions flash over Severus's face: confusion, fear, anger and more she couldn't place. She supposed it was only natural that he get emotional over this, though he really needed to get better about hiding it. It really was good she'd decided to warn him. She didn't think his Death Eater friends would take kindly to such a reaction.
"You understand what this means, right?" she pressed on. "We can't be seen with her."
"But she's our friend," he protested, not catching on in the slightest.
"Yes I know," she snapped impatiently. "And I don't like this any more than you do, but Sev... I'm under scrutiny from my parents and you... if people think you're disloyal to the cause..."
She saw his face fall and knew he understood. Knew that if Mulciber or Rowle or so many of those other more fanatical supporters got wind of his caring about a blood traitor he'd be screwed. It was bad enough that he'd been friendly with Evans for so many years.
"How long do we have?" he asked, sounding rather hopeless.
Eloise shrugged. "Best guess? By tonight everyone in Slytherin will know. By next week, the whole school will be buzzing with it."
Severus swore and Eloise sighed and nodded, wondering if she should risk telling him about her half-formed plan to find Vin tonight. She wasn't going to let this friendship die without one last conversation. Not after they'd known each other for so long. But Severus was one of the Death Eater crowd and if any of them found out... it wasn't worth the risk, she decided.
"I just thought you should have a heads up," she added, then left without waiting for a response. She had neither time nor energy to devote to his questions or emotions over the matter. She had enough of her own.
Truthfully, she didn't entirely know how to process this. Lavinia Selwyn was practically the gold standard of what daughters were supposed to be like in the pureblood community. Eloise had lost track of the number of times she'd been told she should be more like the other girl. Lavinia was pretty and intelligent and obedient and lined up to marry the heir of the most powerful pureblood house. That she was being labelled a blood traitor, that she had left seemed insane and Eloise didn't believe for a second that 'abandoned her family' could even begin to describe what had happened. She wanted Lavinia's explanation before she passed her personal judgement. Not that it would change what she outwardly showed.
But she also knew that she would likely, and unfortunately, be in a minority there. People wouldn't be inclined to question their parents' word, especially not if the news came from Rhea Selwyn, who was about as fearsome as they came. So people would believe it. And they would shun her. Eloise found herself suddenly grateful everyone was so busy for the last few months of school. With enough focus on their studies maybe this could be less of a disturbance than it otherwise would have been.
That evening, Eloise bid Thomas goodnight after they returned from the library but didn't go up to the dormitories herself. Instead she waited in the common room for Lavinia to reappear, which she did at almost 11:30 pm, no doubt having been kicked out of the library at curfew. The other girl looked rather surprised to see Eloise still up, but didn't say anything, instead simply setting her books down on a table in the corner and going about her business.
Understanding she was going to have to be the one to initiate this conversation, and, rather begrudgingly realizing that that was probably a good thing, Eloise stood up from her arm chair and made her way over to Lavinia, checking to make sure the common room was empty.
"Hey," she started awkwardly.
Lavinia looked up, a frown creasing her features. "Hi," she murmured, sounding hesitant, also glancing around the room.
"I... well. I got a letter from home today," Eloise began, inwardly cringing at how unsure she sounded.
Lavinia nodded slowly. "I guessed," she admitted.
"I just... I wanted to ask..." She faltered and sighed, giving up on attempting tact or formality. "Why?" she said finally.
Lavinia looked up at the other girl for a long moment, her face unreadable. "Because it got bad," she said finally, her voice betraying no emotion at the admission. "And I was sick of the bruises."
Eloise felt her stomach clench, knowing generally what Lavinia was talking about and guessing at the details. "Thomas won't understand," she sighed, not bothering to beat around the bush. "But some of the others might. Severus... Severus will, I think. But you need to be careful," she warned. She shook her head, hardly believing she had to have this conversation. "I'm sorry," she whispered finally, and meant it. It was shitty situation that her friend was in and made worse by the fact that she was merely protecting her safety and her health and it would cost her everything.
Lavinia smiled, a gesture which more than slightly surprised Eloise, though there was a tint of sadness in the expression all the same. "Don't be," she said softly. "I've known this was coming for months now." She sighed then and glanced away. "I'm sure it'll hurt more when everyone gets back," she admitted.
Eloise nodded. "What about Reg?" she asked rather hesitantly.
A tender expression crossed Lavinia's face and it made Eloise smile slightly even as her heart lurched for both of them. But the other girl was careful about her response and, Eloise knew, not without reason. "Reg will do what's best," she hedged.
Eloise nodded again, knowing she had no business prying. Whether Lavinia was protecting Regulus or herself was immaterial. So she pivoted, bracing herself for the thing she knew she needed to ask, but hated to say out loud. "Vin," she started. "I know I have no right to ask an it's going to make me sound awful but-"
Lavinia uninterrupted the brunette, shaking her head. "I'll stay away, El," she assured her without hesitation.
Eloise felt her chest tighten at the easy understanding in Lavinia's voice. She didn't want to let this girl go. "I'm really really sorry," she whispered.
Lavinia's smile was sad but genuine and there was ferocity to it that surprised Eloise. "I would never ask you to take a beating for me," she informed her.
Eloise felt tears beading in her eyes and she blinked them back furiously, hating the display of emotion. "Thank you," she replied, truly grateful. Then she paused, thinking, marveling at this insane idea that had just struck her. "If I..." She paused, mildly annoyed with herself for being unable to finish a sentence in one go tonight. "If I sent you letters," she started again, trailing off as Lavinia nodded slightly, evidently catching the drift.
The other girl's smile this time was wider and brighter. "I would like that very much," she murmured. "And," she added, apparently reading Eloise's hesitation. "No one would ever find out from me."
Eloise gave a sharp nod. "I'm going to miss you," she sighed, which was perhaps as close to an admission of sadness as she was ever going to get.
Perhaps Lavinia knew this because the other girl inclined her head slightly. "I'm going to miss you too, El," she replied.
Eloise nodded distractedly. Then, glancing around the room one more time, she wrapped Lavinia in a quick hug, the other girl reaching up to pat her shoulder but making no protest when Eloise pulled away and walked up the stairs towards the dormitory without any further word.
She felt slightly guilty about the sudden departure, but the reality was that Eloise didn't like being vulnerable. People could use that against you, as she had been made well aware from a very young age. Which was also why she didn't like it when other people confided in her. It made her nervous she would accidentally let something slip that she wasn't supposed to.
She truly was going to miss Lavinia, however. The other girl, however arrogant she sometimes was, was fiercely protective of the people she cared for, incredibly intelligent and more than willing to help out with homework and always good for a laugh. In short, she was a good friend and Eloise would miss that.
As if she'd needed a reminder of just how good a friend Lavinia was, the other girl had picked up on the biggest problem Eloise had been facing. I would never ask you to take a beating for me. With that one sentence Lavinia had offered absolution of Eloise's guilt. The brunette hadn't wanted to be the one to make that decision. Didn't want to have to choose between her friend and her safety, but... but she knew which choice she would have made it would have hung over her head for the rest of her life. And Lavinia, in her usual, deft manner, had picked up on that and made the decision for her.
Not that all of the guilt was gone. The knowledge of what she would have done was still there. But it was easier, to know that Lavinia didn't blame her in the slightest. Because of course Lavinia wouldn't. That wasn't her style, anyway, Eloise knew. If she cared, she cared, and she would happily absolve the person of almost any wrongdoing. She'd done as much with Severus, Eloise knew. For all that the two of them had never been as close as they'd once been, Lavinia also had never shouted at him or told him off or blocked him out of her life for all that, from what Eloise knew of the incident, she would have had every right to do so.
Eloise sighed as she settled down in bed. She had truly meant what she'd said, about sending letters. But of course, they would have to be secret. She rolled over and huffed slightly, privately hating the absolutes of white and black and in or out that their families all functioned on. But she wasn't going to give this up so easily. She wasn't going to drop a friend she'd grown up with. Which meant she would have to be very good at pretending because in public she would have to hate Lavinia unless she wanted to risk the same fate.
Eloise shook her head slightly. There was no use dwelling on it. The deed was done. The decision was made. And for her, at least, that meant the game was on.
A/N: Hello again :) Not much to talk about today, other than a mild complaint that I'm sure all of the other authors out there will relate to. I wrote a chapter today. Then re-read it, decided I hated it and deleted it before trying again. Which was annoying, but take 2 came out much better lol. Still, it was like 4 hours of my day wasted. Not that I really had other things to do. Case in point, I spent the 2 hours after that getting in touch with my inner child and making chalk art on my back patio. Which was amazing. I highly recommend it. The little kid in me loved drawing flowers and fake starry night and the 'adult' me like illustrating poetic quotes in unnecessarily fancy handwriting. So really, it was a win-win.
Anyway, as always I hope y'all enjoy and I'll be back again tomorrow :)