CH 19
not like other girls
Mammon: hello my wonderful friends
Satan: What do you want?
Mammon: why do you think i want something??
Satan: You came into the chat calling us wonderful because you're trying to butter us up.
Mammon: ok nancy drew
Nancy Drew: I'm taking this name with pride.
Levi: Asmo is Bess and Beel is George
Nancy Drew: I don't remember the Clue Crew being so dysfunctional.
MC: Asmo's too self centered to be Bess
Beel: I sense some bitterness MC
MC: Lol
Mammon: so anywayyyy
Mammon: i was reading RADs newspaper today
Mammon: apparently we have a serial graffiti artist in town
Mammon: the mysterious 'L.S'
Nancy Drew: That's their signature, right?
Mammon: sure is
Nancy Drew: I can't say I dislike them.
Levi: Huh? Really?
Nancy Drew: They are a rather progressive artist.
Nancy Drew: My favorite one is the word PRIDE in rainbow capital letters on the pillar in front of city hall.
MC: Geez, you're pretty knowledgeable on the situation Satan. It's kind of surprising.
Nancy Drew: Why? I thought I've always shown a love for the arts.
MC: Well yeah, but this is a crime.
Nancy Drew: I watch true crime shows nearly every day.
Levi: My favorite was the one they did at the aquarium saying 'Free our friends' with the shark from nemo.
Nancy Drew: Huh. Nice to see you branching out your interests Levi.
Levi: I thought it was a well known fact how much I love marine animals.
Beel: Im half convinced you're a mermaid.
Levi: If I was you all know full well I wouldn't be part of your world
Mammon: Levi watched Free! once and decided he was Haru kin
MC: jddkj whys that so accurate
MC: Ok back on track, what do you want with the graffiti artist Mammon?
Mammon: there's a $1000 reward for whoever catches them
Mammon: i say we turn em in and split the money
Mammon: it cant be hard to do since we got Satan
Nancy Drew: Normally I wouldn't pass up the chance to solve a good mystery, but I wouldn't feel right giving L.S a permanent record when they've done nothing wrong.
Mammon: aww come on! detectives are supposed to save the day!
Nancy Drew: I highly doubt anyone is unsafe because of a kid running around with spray paint.
Mammon: you dont know that for sure! they can blind someone with paint!
Beel: You really cant find an easier way to make a quick buck Mammon?
Mammon: justice has no price
MC: Lmao shut up Mammon you literally committed identity theft in front of a live audience
MC: I am curious to know who had the balls to vandalize City Hall, though
Nancy Drew: Definitely someone who wanted to protest the incident last year
Mammon: you mean the controversy over painting the road?
Nancy Drew: Exactly.
MC: I'm lost
Nancy Drew: Our local LGBTQ organization wanted to paint an intersection's crosswalks rainbow to celebrate. The town council and the mayor voted no to allowing the project, and it never happened. This was a means for revenge.
Mammon: so the person who wanted to do the painting is the culprit!
Nancy Drew: Not necessarily. There were a lot of people who wanted to be apart of that project.
MC: Fuck the mayor for that
Mammon: you think it's possible they'll hit his house?
Nancy Drew: No, it's not as though their only message is about pride.
Nancy Drew: So far, I believe, they've struck City Hall, the aquarium, the zoo, a convenience store, and a retirement home. All drawings were criticism of the respective establishment.
MC: Ok, I understand why you'd want to criticize the zoo, since it's pretty fucked to keep wild animals in cages. But what about the other two?
Nancy Drew: The convenience store is owned by Mr. Turner.
Beel: GOOD.
Beel: FUCK THAT GUY.
MC: BEEL???
Levi: Beel and Mammon once went in there to buy snacks and Turner told Mammon 'you better not steal anything from me monkey boy'
Levi: Just because his skin color is a little dark
Levi: Beel nearly murdered a man that day
Beel: I cant believe i almost gave him my money.
Beel: I'm glad this graffiti artist gave that guy what he deserves
Mammon: :') Thanks big guy
Beel: Anytime
MC: I never knew this town was so... cruel
Levi: its not like we're particularly nice people either
Mammon: ^ id be rich if i had a nickel for every time someone called me a demon
Nancy Drew: As for the retirement home, it's infamous for treating the elderly residents like garbage. Things like giving them baths once a week and using their credit cards.
MC: Oh my God.
Levi: Mammon, it's your people
Mammon: Oi
Mammon: im greedy but im not a complete piece of shit
Mammon: i changed my mind. i dont wanna turn this guy in
Nancy Drew: Excellent. Now that that's resolved, let's hunt him down.
Levi: What?!
Nancy Drew: My curiosity is bugging me. I really want to know who it is, and now Mammon won't be a hindrance.
Mammon: gee. thanks.
Nancy Drew: Besides, I already have a hunch.
Beel: So do I.
MC: What? Even you Beel?
Mammon: who is it????
Nancy Drew: It's only a hunch. I have no proof.
Beel: I don't think it can be anyone else.
Nancy Drew: Then we'll just have to drag the truth out.
Nancy Drew: We'll host a stakeout.
Levi: How are we meant to figure out when and where they'll go?
DM: Satan & Beel
Satan: I have a plan.
Satan: We'll fake him out, and make him think he's safe.
Beel: Can we get some burgers if we're gonna do this?
Satan: Of course.
not like other girls
Nancy Drew: We'll be hosting a stakeout at the crosswalk tonight. Be there by 10 everyone.
MC: Its a school night tho
Mammon: MC we literally stay up every night arguing about condiment flavors n shit
Mammon: you need a better excuse then that
MC: Nah lmao I just needed to screenshot evidence to show Lucifer that I tried to stop us
MC: If he finds out
Levi: What makes you so sure the crosswalk will get vandalized Satan?
Satan: Don't worry about it
Mammon: thats suspicious as fuck
MC: Wait what if we catch him and he tries to fight back
Satan: What do you think we're bringing Beel for?
Mammon: nah nah i got it covered
Mammon: buzzbuzz.jpg
Satan: Where in Diavolo's name did you get a hot pink taser.
Mammon: https://www.thehomesecuritysuperstore.com/products/cheetah-max-power-rechargeable-led-stun-gun-pink-10m?variant=19019960778825&msclkid=acf7f08f2caf180c0b04ae285d53d7f0&utm_source=bing&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=Shopping%20-%20Top%20Performers&utm_term=4581871111836296&utm_content=Top%20Performers%20-%20Revenue%20%2F%20Cost
MC: :0 I want one
Beel: I should buy Belphie one
Levi: Why tho
Beel: He hasn't exercised a day in his life
Beel: I wouldn't be all that shocked if he lost a fight to a chihuahua
Mammon: bruh he'd finally be able to kill MC with this
MC: SHIT YOU RIGHT
Beel: ...
Levi: RIP MC at least they went out doing what they loved
MC: ?? Getting tazed????
Levi: Being problematic
MC: Wow ok thanks levi
Satan: Alright you gremlins enough banter.
Satan: Start heading out.