Kitna Adhoora Lagta Hai Jab Chatt Bhi Ho Aur Saaya Na Ho....
Use Khone Se Darte Bhi Ho
Jise Paaya Bhi Na Ho...
Tum sawal Puchte Ho Us Cheez Ka
Jis Cheez Ka Raaz Hi Bataya Na Ho.
Kitna Adhoora Lagta Hai Jab,
Dil Lag Gaya Ho, Aur Dil Lagaya Bhi Na Ho.....
THIRD PERSON'S POV
"Are you sure about it ?"
Aamina asked, passing her the flower jwellery for the small mayoon function they held for her in the backyard of their house even when she and Murat insisted to have a simple nikaah, nothing else.
"Sure about what Appi ?"
"Marrying Murat."
Aamina's reply drained the glow she had on her face, replacing it with a deep frown.
"Why are you asking that ?"
Why the hell she was asking her such an absurd questioning when she was getting married. Was she trying to question her decision ? Maria didn't knew what was going on her mind but she wasn't liking where their conversation was going.
"I just want to make sure if you are happy or not as you still have time to..."
It was then Maria stopped her from completing her sentence trying to control her anger.
"How could you ask me to back out, Appi ? I would never do that. Murat is my friend and I am going to marry him. I would never back out now."
She was so disappointed with Aamina. She was the one who told her what was meant to be her's will find her and Murat was the one. So, how could she ask her to back out now. Maybe she too changed.
"It came out wrong. I just want your happiness, your heart's contenment that's it. If you are happy marrying Murat then I am happy too. I am sorry if I offended you."
Aamina's words stilled her. Heart's contenment ? It wasn't there. It was bleeding since the day she witnessed him getting married in front of her eyes. It was hurting since the day she went away to save her remaining, shattered self. It was wrecking her insides since she said yes. It was cursing her since the day she hurt him, since the day it saw him begging, since the day she saw tears of desperation in his beautiful dark brown orbs.
She forgot what peace, contentment felt like. Her heart forgot what it felt to be content ages ago and now it didn't mattered. She didn't wanted to listen to her heart. It always yearned for the wrong one, for the one who was keen to hurt her. So, it was better for her to lock her heart and ignore it's pleas.
"Maria...."
Aamina's voice broke her out of the trance she was in and look at her who was observing her, trying to read her.
"Are you happy ?"
"I am."
Heart didn't agreed but mind did knowing how good of a person Murat was and she was lucky to be with him. He understood her and was with her at the most difficult time of her life and she couldn't even thank him for that but she will try her best to be a good wife to him and be with him forever.
"Then I am happy for you."
Giving her a small smile Aamina controlled tears threatening to leak out of her eyes. She couldn't help but feel bad for her brother. He was to lose her again and this time forever.
He always suffered because of his stupid sacrificing self. Why couldn't he be selfish for once and end all his misery ? Even now he was quiet just for her.
Only if she could know how much he loves her. Only if she knew how much he hurt himself, pushing her away from him.
Only if she knew.
"Everyone is waiting. Are you done with everything ?"
Osama knocked, entering the room finding the girls ready for the function. It was a small family function, no outsider was allowed. Nikaah too was to be held simple with only close friends and family unlike the rest of the functions which were for family.
"Let's go."
Getting a green signal from girls he held Maria's hand, escorting her towards the garden area, helping her to sit beside Murat who smiled seeing her.
"You look beautiful, dove."
Clad in a simple, well fitted white kurta pants paired with a yellow waistcoat, he was looking handsome.
"And you look same."
She teased, which immediately wiped off his smile, replace it with a smirk catching her off her guard seeing her plan failing in front of her eyes.
"You mean I look handsome as I manage to look good everyday."
Rolling her eyes, she smiled replying back seeing his over confident self.
"Apni khud ki tareef kaisi karni hai ye tumse seekhna chahiye, Murat."
"I'll teach you. Don't worry."
Smiling widely, he nodded and looked at front where dado was walking towards them ready to apply ubtan and start the mayoon function.
"Kush raho."
After dado one by one every member of the family came to apply ubtan and feed them sweets. Noor too came with a wide smile to apply ubtan over Maria's face with her little hands but her hand stopped when she was about to feed her mithai.
"Aap ki shaadi ho lahi hai phuppho ki tarah ?"
Her eyes widened realising her Ariel was about to get married, her doubts getting confirmed when Maria smiled sadly at her.
"Aap bhi chale jaoge ?"
Her voice came out as a mere whisper, feeling sad when her innocent eyes met with Aamina's who nodded wiping a lone tear which leaked out of her eye.
"Please don't go Aliel."
Not able to hold her tears anymore, she hugged Maria tightly, hiding her teary face in the crook of her neck, feeling sad.
"Noor baby... Don't cry."
Rubbing her back Maria tried consoling her, which made her break hug and hold her hands instead to look at her with hopeful eyes.
"You will leave me ?"
"I have to."
Maria whispered looking down, not able to look in the little girl's broken eyes.
"I am angly. Noor aapse baat nahi kalegi ab. You don't love Noor."
Taking her hands off her's Noor ran inside the house wiping her tears, sobs reaking out her.
"Noor..."
Getting up Maria stood up to run after little Noor when Murat held her hand, stopping her from following her.
"I'll check upon her."
Giving everyone an uneasy smile Aamina rushed after Noor asking them to continue the function, not noticing Mustafa who was standing at a distance watching everything with a broken heart.
"Don't go dove. It will hurt her even more. I told you to keep distance with her and now see what happened."
"Then what should I do now ? She is hurt because of me."
She was dying to go after Noor. To hold her and embrace her in a warm hug. To wipe her tears which pained her so much.
"She'll be fine. Just give her sometime and please don't interfere in her life from now as it will hurt her more. Stay away from her till you are here and she will forget you."
Murat's words hurt her a lot. It hurt when he asked her not to interfere in her life anymore. It hurt when he said Noor will forget her. But wasn't he right ? He asked her to stay away from Noor seeing them getting attached and now it was hurting her to see tears in little girl's eyes. It was all her fault. Only of she could have kept distance with Noor from the start then the poor girl wouldn't have cried because of her. She was feeling guilty for making her cry.
•
Sitting in front of the dressing table she was lost in Noor's thoughts removing her glass bangles when the door of her room opened, revealing Mustafa who entered with the bowl of butna in his hands.
"What are you doing here ?"
Her eyes narrowed and she immediately stood up seeing him standing inside her room.
"Please, get out from here. I don't want Murat to feel betrayed."
Having no energy to fight with him she polietly asked him to get out of her room, not wanting to get into any trouble before her marriage.
"Main aapko ubtan lagane aaya tha.... I didn't had the courage to do it in front of him....."
His voice faltered mentioning Murat, eyes turning misty thinking about her marriage with him, but then he dismissed all of it not wanting to ponder about it and gaze at her to learn every single detail about her, so that it could get easy for him to survive without her.
Mera dil ek aakhri baar aapko jee bhar ke dekhna chahta tha.
"Will you go after that ?"
She asked, able to trace dark circles under his eyes screaming countless of sleepless nights he went through all these years without her. His heart pained seeing her eager to throw him out of her room but she wasn't at fault. She was right on her part but what do with his heart who wanted to be with her before her departure and he wasn't able to deny it, knowing he too wanted the same thing.
"I will."
Nodding he waited for her reply, knowing well she will deny him for sure.
"Okay."
She agreed surprising him and a big smile marred his face as he saw her walking and sit back on the stool, waiting for him to apply ubtan over her face and leave as soon as possible. The smile on his face didn't lasted long realising that this was probably their last meet. The last time when he could watch her to heart's content even when it was not possible. His heart could never feel content even if it got an opportunity to gaze her his whole life.
Keeping up the little smile on his face he sat on his knees diping his fingers inside the bowl and applied it on her cheeks, his gaze never faltering from her beautiful face, eyes not even daring to blink, savouring each and every moment with her, fearing it's end.
"You know you will make the most beautiful bride. He is lucky to have you."
He complimented, gulping down the tears threatening to fall from his eyes, pain clawing his insides screaming to let out.
"Why are you doing this ? Do you want me to feel guilty ? Don't I deserve little happiness after going through so much ?"
She wasn't fool and was able to see well through the curtain of facade he was putting up in front of her. She was able to see pain flick inside his eyes, tearing her heart along with him.
"You deserve every little happiness of this world birdie. You really do."
Wiping her tears with the rough pad of his thumb he stood up to leave, his heart thumping, screaming to go back to her and embrace her tightly and that's what he did, catching her off guard.
"Leave me please."
She pleaded, but he shook his head and clutched onto her tightly for the last time. One by one tears leaked out of his eyes not able to hold them anymore.
"P-please.... Let me hold you. Sirf ek aakhri baar."
Let me hold you so that I'll be able to survive living this moment. I'll cherish this moment my whole life.
Our last moment. Together.
His whole body shook with painful sobs and uncontrollable hiccups. Her own eyes teared up, as she raised her shivering hands to hold him, for the last time and rubbed his back without uttering any word. She didn't realised when he released her, confessing his love knowing there won't be any chance left with him after that.
"I love you and will keep loving you only, till my last breath."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Salam everyone,
How was the chapter ?
It was difficult for me write this chapter as after every few minutes I wasn't able to control my emotional self from crying but anyways I did because of you guys. I was able to do it knowing you all will shower me with lots of votes and beautiful comments.
Is Murat doing right marrying her even though he doesn't love her ? Is marriage the only solution to keep Mustafa away from her ?
How many of you feel sad for Mustafa ?
State one positive characteristic of your two favourite characters from the book.
Next chapter goal : 250+ votes
Sorry, for increasing the goal. Par aap log itni jaldi target achieve kar lete ho ke mujhe apne liye time nahi milta and I think I deserve more than 250 votes.
Keep showering your love and support to me.
Till next time,
Allah Hafiz.
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