During the night, a knock on the window woke Lily Evans from a deep sleep, and a dream that she'd have rathered to stay in a bit longer.
Lily could almost feel the warm weight of the baby in her arms, could almost smell the damp sweetness of the little boy's head. She'd held him so that his little round head rested in he crook of her elbow, his perfect little lips a soft, glistening pucker in the middle of the chubby curve of his pinkened cheeks. She'd been rocking him gently in her dream, backward and forward, and she'd been singing, a song she'd heard on one of Sirius's records, one she loved very much.
"Yesterday a child came out to wonder... caught a dragonfly inside a jar... Fearful when the sky was full of thunder, and tearful at the falling of a star... And the seasons they go 'round and 'round, and the painted ponies go up and down... We are captive on the carousel of time... We can't return, we can only look behind from where we came... and go 'round and 'round and 'round in the circle game..."
The baby had moved in slow, dream-like twitches and shifts, and Lily had bent forward, pressing her mouth to his forehead just where his hair met his skin. "You are so, so loved," she'd whispered to him. To Harry. For she knew that was his name. Harry. She could have held him forever, just rocking and singing him to sleep...
But then there'd been the knock.
Knuckles rapping on glass with an urgent air, followed by the muffled sound of someone shouting - "EVANS."
Lily's eyes blinked open and she stared at the dark ceiling, disoriented.
"EVANS!"
She turned her head and saw, in the bright, pale light of the near-to-full moon, the silhouette of James Potter on broomstick, just outside her bedroom window. She rolled out of bed, tugging her bathrobe onto her shoulders, and crossed the room, tugging open the heavy glass with some difficulty. "Not tonight, James," she said wearily as a rush of cold air came through the window, "It's the middle of the night." Last time he'd done this it had been to whisk her off on his broomstick for a date, and she was far too exhausted to go off on some grand adventure with him at the moment...
James shook his head, "It's not that. It's Moony." He came close enough to reach the window sill and pulled himself through the window, tripping and nearly falling on the carpet, only just catching his balance.
Lily closed the window tightly, being sure the latch caught, and turned to James. "What do you mean, 'it's Moony'? What's the matter with Remus?" She glanced at the window, at the moon, and her stomach turned, "He's not turned --"
"No, no," James said, "That's tomorrow night. But he's in a bad way. He's real sick. You gotta come help us." His voice was nervous with worry.
Lily kicked her feet into her slippers and hurried to her dresser. "What's the matter with him?" she asked, digging through the drawers for the small first aids kit that her mum had insisted she bring to Hogwarts - even though Lily had quite patiently explained that at school most maladies were healed by magic, not band-aids. However, seeing as Remus's ailment was of the magical sort, magic failed him by a good margin, and Lily thought perhaps the muggle kit might come in handy.
"He's sweating buckets," James replied, voice hurried, "And asking for Sirius, but bloody hell knows where that --" he paused, about to call Sirius something very rude, but he stopped mid-sentence instead, not wanting to offend Lily.
Lily took her potions kit, too, and the pair of them hurried down the little hall to the stairs. Crossing the common room, Lily asked, "How long's he been like this?"
"Dunno," James replied, "Peter and I woke up maybe ten minutes ago when he was shouting for Sirius..." He frowned nervously.
They hustled into the dormitory, where Peter was sitting on the edge of Remus's bed, his eyes wide as saucers, looking a bit twitchy, as Remus whimpered and shook beneath the covers beside him. He scrambled out of the way the moment James and Lily entered the room, making way for Lily, who rushed to Remus's side.
"Remus, honey," Lily said quietly, and she raised her palm to his forehead.
"Sirius?" Remus croaked, his voice was thin and weak.
"No honey, it's me, Lily."
His forehead was hot to the touch, so much so that it nearly seemed to burn Lily's hand. She drew back in surprise. "He's - he's burning up!"
"I know," James said, worried expression on his face.
"Get me a cool damp cloth," Lily commanded.
James drew his hand kerchief from his nightstand drawer and aimed his wand at it, "Aguamenti," he said, and held it out to Lily.
She pressed the kerchief to Remus's head, staring down into his face, "Oh you poor, poor boy," she whispered, "It's alright, I'm here now, Remus, and I'm going to take care of you."
His eyes cracked ever so slightly, and staring up at her blearily through the slits, he breathed, "Lil..."
"Yes, Remus, it's me," she ran the cloth 'round his cheeks, feeling the heat from his skin seep into the cloth, draining the coolness from it. She half expected the thing to steam as though being ironed for how hot his face was. Werewolves, she thought, clearly had a much higher tolerance for fever - any human would be dead long before their skin reached these kinds of temperatures. Even as she thought the words, her heart raced. She looked at the other two. "Does he always get a bad temperature before the moon like this?" She couldn't recall it herself, but of course James and Peter had much more experience with Remus's transformation than she had ever been privvy to.
James shrugged, "A few times, I s'pose... I dunno how hot he usually gets or anything..." When Lilly looked at him imploringly, James added, "Sirius usually takes care of him."
Lily glanced at Sirius's empty bed. "He never came back from Transfiguration?"
James shook his head.
"Sirius?" Remus murmured, having heard the name. "Is... is he here? I - I need - him."
Lily sighed and smoothed Remus's hair back from his face, "I know, baby," she whispered softly, "I know. We're trying to find him, but I'm here in the meantime... I'm here."
Remus whimpered.
Lily held out the cloth and blasted it with some fresh water from her wand. She looked at James as she wrung the cloth out a bit so it wasn't dripping. "You two go and find Sirius."
James nodded and scrambled to the night stand to see if, by some miracle, Sirius had left the map there, but he hadn't, and James looked at Peter, "C'mon, Wormtail. It's the old fashioned way for us, then."
Peter nodded, stealing nervous looks back at Remus and Lily, and followed as James led the way out the dormitory door and down the steps to the common room.
Lily stayed with Remus, running the cloth over his face, and, because it was fresh in her mind from having been singing in her dream, she started the refrain up again: "So the years spin by and now the boy is twenty, though his dreams have lost some grandeur coming true.. There'll be new dreams, maybe better dreams, and plenty... Before the last revolving year is through... And the seasons they go 'round and 'round... and the painted ponies go up and down..."
It seemed like hours later when James and Peter returned, Sirius in tow. They'd found him finally in the Shrieking Shack, asleep in the room upstairs, an empty bottle of firewhiskey on the mattress beside him. He was dirty and smelled like the woods, he'd been out running about as a dog since leaving McGonagall, and had knicked the bottle from the Hog's Head storeroom before going and collapsing in the Shack. Now, he was stumbling, barely upright, but worried about Remus so that he came the moment James and Peter had stammered out what was happening.
"Moony," Sirius drawled, hurrying to Remus's side, and Lily recoiled at the smell of the firewhiskey on his breath, looking at James and Peter with sharply questioning eyes. "My Moony."
Remus, too, reacted to the smell of the alcohol, his nose crumpling as he roused in agitation, "Wh -what's that smell?" he demanded, offended.
"How much of that rubbish have you had?" Lily demanded.
"Barely a drop," Sirius answered breezily.
"A full bottle," James corrected.
"Such a stickler for the facts," Sirius slurred at him, wagging his finger in James's direction.
James raised an eyebrow, "Yeah, mate, it's called not lying."
Sirius made a gesture of shushing him, one finger pressed to his lips, and he looked back at Remus, "Don't worry, Moon-Moon, I'm here."
Lily blocked Sirius, protective of Remus and a darkly fierce expression on her pretty face. "Maybe it's better if you go and sober up first," she injected.
Sirius laughed, "What do you think, that there's a spell to sober up or something?"
Lily glowered at him. "I'm not letting you by him. You're ripe to say something idiotic and hurt him, or else throw up all over him or some thing." She waved a palm, "Not to mention if you are as offending to my nose hole as you are, then I can't imagine what kind of reek you must be to his."
"Oh come off it, Evans," Sirius made to step 'round her, "I don't think I need permission to see my sick fiance."
She raised her wand. "Well I think you do."
Sirius scoffed, "What're you going to do? Hex me?"
"Yes."
They stared at one another.
"Go take a shower, Sirius," Lily said sternly. "You may come back when you don't smell like a whorehouse bar." She pointed with her free hand and snapped her fingers for him to go.
Sirius glowered.
James reached out for Sirius's arm, "C'mon mate, she has a point, you are pretty rank."
Sirius rounded on James, "Don't touch me."
"I'll ruddy touch you if I want to," James snapped back, "You know, you're acting like a real prat lately and it's got to stop."
"You're not my parents!" Sirius said, "Stop talking to me like that."
"No bloody kidding I'm not your parents!" James declared, "But last I checked that was a plus in my favor, seeing as your parents are horrible people bent on killing everyone!" He took hold of Sirius's elbow, his grip firm as if he was holding onto a snitch. "We'll be right back."
"Get your fucking hands off me."
James wrenched Sirius out the door, down the stairs, through the portrait hole, and on down the corridor. Sirius flailed and tugged, trying to get away, but James, being athletic and well built from years of quidditch, was much stronger than Sirius, and able to keep him held fast and moving forward, until they'd reached the prefect's bathroom and James got them inside. Kicking on the faucet, he waited until there was just enough water that the fall wouldn't hurt and he pushed Sirius unceremoniously into the pool of warm water.
Sirius came up spluttering, blowing water out of his nose and mouth, his hair bedraggled and hanging in thick black ropes 'round his face. "Could've drowned me, I --" he was choking on water.
James stood, staring down at him, while Sirius enacted all of the dramatics he could muster. Finally, when Sirius's cacophony died down, James asked, "Is this really how you want to end our time at Hogwarts, mate? With all of us at each other's throats and you acting like you're back in third year, running about with those kids like you're one of them? Treating us, your real friends, like rubbish, and losing Remus for good with your attitude?"
Sirius floated heavily in the water.
"Or do you think that's rather stupid and you ought to smarten up and perhaps apologize to some of us for being such a git and let us in on whatever it is that's bothering you so that we can help or at least be there for you?"
Sirius didn't answer.
"I know you're not getting into the universities you wanted, Lily told us you applied, and I think it's rubbish they're not accepting you. You'd know how angry I am with the programs if you were paying any attention, and how much I want to help you. You'd know I'd written home and asked Dad if he knew anyone at the Ministry or any of the Unis that might could talk some sense into the admissions. You'd know that he says he does and he's reaching out to 'em for you. You'd know that Professor McGonagall wrote you a proper recommendation letter and that dad's bringing it Monday to St. Mungo's."
Sirius looked up at James.
"You'd know Dumbledore is outraged and that he was in the prophet yesterday talking about unfair admissions processes and petitioning the Ministry to begin a blind acceptance policy, where the choice is made without the name of the student attached to the application so they can't look at anything except the work that's been put in."
Sirius looked down at the water.
"And," James said, his voice winding down, "You'd know that your precious Moony needs you a whole lot bloody more than you realize and that you're letting a bunch of petty rubbish get in the way of that... because honestly, how long are any of us going to be in the universities anyway, with a war on the brink of starting? I reckon before long that the Order of the Phoenix will be more important than anything any of use will aspire to at any of the universities. If it wasn't for the fact that auror training will actually help a good deal in fighting You Know Who, I wouldn't even bother going to uni anyway."
Sirius's voice was thick, "But you have the choice to go. If you wanted to."
James answered, "I s'pose. But I think what we're going to be doing with the Order will end up being way more important anyway."
Sirius thought a moment, then, "Yeah."
"Sticking together is way more important than uni, mate," James said, "You are way more important."