You are loved.
You are worth it.
Don't let any tell you,
That you are worthless.
They may yell a slew,
Of profanities, insults,
And call you terrible things.
Just ignore them;
Don't let them strip you of your wings.
But I can't,
I want to scream out.
They say sticks and stones,
Can break my bones,
But they don't realize that,
Words hurt just as much.
But I wish,
It wasn't such.
They cut and slash me,
Deep within my soul.
For I have let them have power,
Over me so long ago.
I regret it.
I hate it.
Everything I did to quell this pain,
Makes me feel so sick.
I pretended that I was still the same,
In order to save face.
I pretended that nothing had happened,
So that my friends would give me space.
But in reality,
I wanted them to come.
I wanted them to ask me,
And beg for me to tell them why.
Maybe then,
I might finally break down and cry.
Nothing seemed to work,
To provide me some sense of relief.
I tried making my scars visible,
In hopes that the ones within,
Would stop burning.
That did nothing,
But make me regret my actions more.
Why have I let myself become this thing,
This empty shell that I abhor.
I hate myself,
For giving up so soon.
I should have asked for help,
Under that pale blue moon.
Instead of keeping my feelings hidden,
I should have said them out loud.
I'm not proud,
Of what I've done.
I'm not proud,
Because I decided to get up and run,
Away from my fears.
I should have faced them,
When they first appeared.
But here I am,
Still yet another coward.
I want to slam,
My head against the wall.
Maybe then I'll finally realize,
When I started to fall.
I let those words control me,
Mold me into what I hated.
Why did I have to succumb to my insecurities?
Why do I feel so frustrated?
This situation is spiraling out of control,
And out of my reach.
I try to resist that urge,
And I try to hide that bottle of bleach.
Temptation beckons me to not be rational,
That I have everything I ever wanted within reach.
Shut up.
Shut up,
I don't want to listen to that little devil on my shoulder anymore.
Because of it,
I let them pluck every single feather,
Strip me into a flightless bird.
Why didn't I fight back?
Is it because I believe so much in that word?
I can't be worthless.
I can't be not worth a dime.
I need to give myself,
Some more time.
I can't make rash decisions,
When I'm not in the right state of mind.
I need to find,
Myself again.
Maybe then,
I'll finally understand,
What I really want.
I won't listen anymore to their taunts.
I won't let them goad me,
Into hurting myself anymore.
I'll be who I was before.
I don't care what they think, do, or say.
I'll make them listen to me,
At the end of the day.
I won't let these desperate words,
Be lost again.
I won't let them be unsaid,
Ever again.