I woke late the next day; the room was bright with the afternoon sun. For a moment, I didn't move, snug and comfortable as I was in the crook of Edward's arm. His chest moved beneath me, rising gently with each breath, and his heart thumped strongly. In that moment, feeling him warm and healthy beside me, nothing seemed so bad.
When I lifted my head, I saw that he was awake, watching me. I offered a small smile as I studied his green eyes closely, wanting to store the exact shade in my memories.
Edward had other ideas. He took my face between his hands and pulled me to him for an urgent kiss. For once, I ignored my morning breath rule – he had my human weaknesses too, after all – and moved my lips eagerly against his.
He rolled us, trapping me beneath him as his kiss grew more intense, his tongue delving into my mouth. Our breath mingled hotly while his body moved against mine, and I responded helplessly. My body acted with the keening demands of my heart, which recognized in Edward its true match.
Eventually he pulled away to breathe, eyes too bright, and his thumbs continued to caress the line of my jaw. "I'm sorry – I needed to feel you there," he breathed. His fingers came to tangle in my hair, freed as it was from its usual confine of pins.
"Don't apologize for that," I whispered back. "I was made to be whatever you need."
"So that's how you do it so effortlessly," he smiled, massaging my scalp gently. It was hard not to purr in delight.
"I love you." It seemed the only appropriate thing to say at the moment, and even then, it wasn't nearly enough.
He sighed happily and smiled as he nuzzled my cheek. "You can't imagine how those three words make me feel. It's as if nothing can be completely wrong as long as you love me."
"I understand better than you think," I replied.
We lay wrapped up together for a few minutes longer before I thought we couldn't afford to stay.
"Perhaps I should check on your mother," I suggested. I didn't know how long the flu symptoms took to develop, but if she was next...
"She would appreciate that," Edward agreed. "I worry for her...she seemed so lost last night. I don't know how she'll recover. I don't know how I'll manage all this, for that matter...there's my father's business to consider, all his affairs..."
"Hey, hey," I hushed him, smoothing the hair back from his forehead. "Don't stress yourself. You can only do one thing at a time, so there's no use worrying about it until you get there. For now, let's work on the basic needs. We've missed breakfast and lunch, from the looks of it. I'll see to your mother and find us all something to eat."
He laughed, a sound of shaky relief and reassurance. "You're a miracle, Bella. How did I ever live without you?"
"That's one of the world's great mysteries, I suppose," I teased, slipping out of his grasp and throwing on my dressing gown. "You get dressed and washed up. I'll meet you downstairs."
"Thank you, Bella," he sighed with a grateful smile.
"Of course."
I dressed quickly and then went to peek into the room Elizabeth had used. She was still sleeping, her face drawn with the exhaustion of the night before. I decided to let her rest a while longer. From the time when Edward had left me, I remembered how comforting unconsciousness could be when the world wasn't a pleasant place.
Down in the kitchen, I found Mary slumped over a bowl of potatoes she was attempting to peel.
"Did you get any sleep at all?" I asked her, carefully moving the knife away from her, lest she have an accident dozing off.
"Not much," she admitted. While all the servants obeyed a code of strict formality with the family, I was treated to a little less propriety, which I didn't exactly mind.
"You should go get some sleep. Mrs. Masen isn't even awake yet. I can do the cooking for you. There's no use in you being exhausted."
"You sure, Miss? I know you'll be needed..."
"I'd really like to feel useful right now, actually."
Mary hesitated a moment more before jumping up from the table. "Oh, thank you. I have to admit, I doubted you at first. But I'm glad you're here now."
"Thank you...I think," I muttered as she hurried out of the room. Left alone in the strange kitchen, I did the best I could with the supplies provided. I nearly set the house on fire lighting the gas stove, and I burnt a few things trying to adjust to cooking over the flame.
Edward wandered into the kitchen before I could finish, searching for me.
"You're cooking?" he noted with surprise. "Where's Mary?"
"I sent her to sleep. I'm afraid you're stuck with my culinary masterpieces today," I informed him, handing him a platter of fried potatoes. "Sorry, I've got limited resources."
"That's quite all right," he chuckled. "It smells delicious."
After I had Edward seated with a plate of food, I prepared a tray to take up to Elizabeth, along with a pot of tea. For some reason, tea seemed to be the universal comfort beverage.
When I entered the room for the second time, she stirred, blinking against the afternoon light. She didn't say anything, but smiled gratefully as I sat the tray on the bedside table.
"I'm not sure you'll care for the food," I said nervously, uncertain and treading carefully as I sat gingerly on the edge of the bed. "I did the cooking so that Mary could get some sleep...but I hope it's good. If you need or want anything, please let me know. I want to help."
Elizabeth smiled – but it didn't quite reach her eyes – and she patted my hand. "You're a good girl. I think...I would like some time alone today. It's difficult for me to come to terms with – with what happened. I know I needn't ask, but would you take care of Edward? I don't think I can be what he needs now...but you can."
"I'll do my very best," I promised, feeling tears pooling in my eyes.
"Thank you." Her voice was breathy with mingled strain and relief.
When I went back downstairs, I saw that Edward had already finished eating and left. Suddenly ravenous, I took a minute to feed myself before I went searching the house for him.
He wasn't in any of the main rooms, or his bedroom. Eventually, I found him in his father's study, sorting through the contents of the desk drawers. His eyes were pained when he looked up at my entrance.
"The servants took care of everything pressing, but all his things...I don't know what to make of half these papers. His will, his banking accounts...I don't know where any of that information is."
I approached carefully, not wanting to disturb any of the piles he'd created around him, and reached out to touch his face. He closed his eyes and sighed.
"Remember what I said? One thing at a time," I said, looking around at the mess. "We'll do what we can with what we recognize and find someone to help us with what we don't. Maybe Car – Dr. Cullen could help us. He would understand some of the financial things, at least."
"Right," Edward nodded. "Will you help me?"
"Of course. You never had to ask."
We spent the rest of the day on the floor of the office, looking through papers and ledgers and everything else that was in there. At one point, we did find his father's will and the information about the bank accounts, which was a relief to Edward, knowing he and his mother would be provided for. Now and then we'd come across other objects, unrelated to business – his father's pipe, a weirdly misshapen elephant Edward had tried to carve as a child after they'd visited the circus. I listened to Edward's stories about these items with rapt attention – while it was part of the grieving process for him, I was drinking up the knowledge of his childhood. By the time we finished, I felt like I'd been introduced to a whole new Edward...again.
Mary woke up to cook a late dinner, thankfully. While Edward had complimented my cooking, I didn't think anybody knew quite what to make of my dishes. Future-food, I called it to myself. Things they'd never been introduced to. I took another tray up to Elizabeth and found her much the same as she'd been earlier. I wondered if she would ever be her warm and cheery self again...and then it occurred to me that she wouldn't have the time to recover from this pain. At the thought, I couldn't stop the tears from flowing. Thankfully, Edward had good reason to misinterpret my distress, and he held me without question.
The next day went much the same. Edward and I spent the morning finishing in the study. We decided to leave everything we didn't know what to do with for another day, and after lunch we went for a rest in the parlor. Elizabeth finally emerged from her room and joined us for a short time, but she didn't say much. Mostly, she stared into space, though she held a book in front of her, and after dinner, she retreated again.
Edward seemed to be doing better, but I couldn't relax completely. I knew it was only the calm before the storm.
The next morning, I stirred awake as Edward was getting out of bed. I reached for him, tempted to pull him back to me.
"I'm going to go check on my mother this morning," Edward explained, squeezing my hand. "I feel like...I should be doing more for her."
"No, Edward, don't feel guilty," I argued immediately. Edward's tendency to take guilt upon himself was certainly one of his inherent traits. "I don't think there's much that anyone can do. She'll just need time."
"I know," he acknowledged unhappily. "I can only imagine what it would be like to...well, I can't imagine. Maybe that's the point."
"I'm not following you," I admitted, sitting up to watch him dress. I liked the awkward movement of him pulling his shirt on and the funny balancing act as he pulled his pants up.
He bit his lip and his gaze fell intently on me. "I'm talking about losing the one you love. I don't know how I would go on..."
"Oh." It was barely a puff of air. "I know what you mean."
He finished buttoning and smiled almost wistfully at me. "I'll see you downstairs when you're ready." He leaned over the bed to kiss me. I held him there longer than he intended to stay, pressing my lips firmly against his. I needed him to feel how much I loved him; it seemed especially important today for some reason.
When he pulled away, he was grinning. "If every morning can begin that way, I'll never complain."
I watched him go with an uneasy feeling, but I shook it off, knowing I would feel better when I was with him again. I climbed out of bed as usual and reached for my dressing gown. I'd barely tied it around me when Edward's voice called for me, its tone shrill and frantic.
Knowing in the pit of my stomach what was coming, I ran toward the sound. Edward was in his mother's room, leaning over her. Somehow, she hadn't woken to Edward's cry, and I realized with horror that she was flushed and drenched in sweat. I looked to Edward, struck painfully by the open panic on his face.
"I don't know what to do for her," he croaked. I saw the knowledge in his eyes that she was suffering the same disease that had killed his father, the knowledge that she might be lost as well. I wanted to hold him, but it wasn't the time.
"I don't either," I admitted. "Maybe...should we take her to the hospital?"
Edward nodded, trying to appear calm, though I knew he wasn't. "The hospital. Right, that's a good idea. I'll...I'll get the servants to help me with her to the car so you can get dressed."
I nodded and went to my room to scramble into my usual dress. My fingers were shaking and it was hard to do up the buttons, but I managed somehow. Before I left, I checked the pocket, making sure the rings I'd worn with me from the future were still there. I didn't want to risk losing them in this time.
"Bella!" Edward rushed up to me as soon as I stepped out. "Mary is ill, too. Hannah is helping her...can you go to them? I'll carry my mother out..."
"Of course," I agreed, already scurrying down the stairs. My stomach churned with my horror. In my fear for Edward and his family, I had never considered that the servants might fall ill, too. I felt tears escaping for the woman I'd formed a tentative friendship with, but there was no time to acknowledge the pain.
Downstairs in Mary's room, the housemaid Hannah had gotten Mary to sit up and was wrapping her up in a shawl. The poor cook's eyes were glazed with fever.
"We need to get her to the car to take her to the hospital with Mrs. Masen," I said as I squeezed my way into the small bedroom. "Can you help me support her?"
It took some difficult maneuvering, and Mary was in no state to cooperate, but we managed to half-guide, half-drag her to the car, where Edward had his mother bundled up in the backseat. He fidgeted anxiously outside the driver's side.
As soon as we had Mary in the back, I jumped in the passenger's seat. Edward had already started the vehicle, ready to go, and we took off toward the hospital. The car wouldn't go fast enough for Edward's liking, and we were obstructed on occasion by horse-drawn wagons and distressed mourners. The city was clearly in a panic, and it was all so much more terrifying than any supposed monster I'd faced. At least vampires could kill quickly and painlessly.
Outside the hospital was a throng of people – healthy people, it looked like. I realized, as some of them pleaded with a man blocking the door, that they were trying to get inside to visit loved ones.
"I'm sorry, it's simply too crowded," the man said, shaking his head. "We're running out of beds; there's no space for everyone to be standing about!"
"Wait here," Edward yelled over the noise of the crowd before he slipped out of the car. I watched him weave through the people, losing him for a moment before he emerged again in the front. He spoke quickly and quietly to the man at the door and was allowed inside. Minutes later, he returned with a young, sandy-haired doctor. I was instructed to wait outside again as Edward carried in his mother and the doctor carried Mary. Neither had the strength to walk. It was heartbreaking to watch Edward struggle with the weight; he was so much weaker than I was used to, and that only emphasized his vulnerability.
The crowd parted almost instantaneously when they realized more sick people were being carried in. Some covered their faces with their sleeves, as if that would save them from catching the illness, too. I didn't know why they thought being inside the hospital with hundreds of sick people would be safe.
Edward returned several long minutes later by himself, face slack and blank. I looked to him worriedly.
"They won't let anyone stay with her," he said hollowly. "I'm allowed to come check on her once a day, but that's it. What if – what if she –"
"I'm so sorry, Edward," I whispered, throwing my arms around him. "But she's strong. She'll hold on for you."
"I hope you're right," he said brokenly into my shoulder. "I can't lose her, too."
As we held each other in the small front seat of the car, I matched him tear for tear.