Tom was trying really hard to not be exceedingly annoying. It had been a long time since he had been on a first date and he really had no clue what to do. He knew where he wanted to go and made the reservations in the morning but now as the clocked neared half past three he wanted to run to her. He wasn't sure when he became giddy with excitement or when the thought of being around her again started to make him smile like an idiot alone in his flat but it happened. So now it was half past three and he was sitting at his kitchen table thinking. He was ready. He'd been ready since two then changed again quarter to three. Now he was set for the brisk fall evening with dark slacks a white button up shirt. His jacket waiting for him by the door. He was waiting, impatiently but waiting still. He passed the time by reading the inscription of the book Amelia had signed. 'To Tom, I hope this book brings you the joy that your work has brought me.' He hadn't read it until today and he was moved. He wanted to open up to her and he wanted to cover her in affection and adoration but everything that had happened to him kept him sitting at the table waiting for the right time to leave. At a quarter to four the alarm he set for himself on his phone went off. He stood and gathered his things and walked out of the door. He wanted to walk but because of the London weather he chose to drive instead. He pulled up to the hotel and parked. He walked in the lobby and nervously waited for the elevator. Should he have brought her flowers? Before he would have he wouldn't have even had a second thought but now he mentally scolded himself for even thinking of such a corny thing to do. The door opened and he entered. The way up to her floor took ages and by the time he got off his anxiety had hit new levels of high. He stood in front of her door and waited for the time on his phone to show ten past four to knock. There was no noise just soft footsteps. The door opened to reveal a very ready Amelia. She had her hair down which he had not seen. Her long brown hair went past her shoulders and he liked that. She was dressed for the weather as well in knee high boots, jeans and a sweater. She looked casual and that seemed to calm Tom. "Hey" She said with a smile. "Ready to go?" He wish he had gotten her flowers. "Yeah for sure" She said in her American accent. They walked in slightly uncomfortable silence to the elevator. The Elevator ride was no better. By the time they reached the lobby the nerves were very palpable for both of them. Amelia hadn't been on a date since her first date with Derek and she was horribly out of practice and she couldn't handle the nerves of the anxiety. She had to stop it and quick. "What time are our reservations?" they stopped "Five" Tom said. Perfect. "would you like to get a drink at the hotel bar?" She said smiling at him and he nodded. They walked in and sat at the bar in silence. Why was it so hard to talk now? Amelia tried to think back were all their exchanges like this? She couldn't recall a time where Tom had said very much to her at all. She sighed which he noticed and mentally cringed knowing that he should do something more than sit here. They order their drinks and in an attempt to get help Amelia pulled out her phone to text Tracy. As the screen lit up she realized that she hadn't looked at her phone since last night and there was a lot she missed. She had used her iPad to facetime the kids so she had never seen the string of missed calls and text. Henry. She didn't want to open them or listen to any of the voice mails. Not now and especially not with tom sitting at her elbow purposely looking away to give her some privacy while she looked at her phone. She opened the text and looked. they started with anger a very palpable anger that at one time would have made her so turned on. He wanted to see her that was evident, but the text all ended in emotional blackmail. 'I miss you' three words that meant so much and yet so little. Before she would have ran to him without reserve but now she was angry. He hurt her and now he missed her. She knew better he didn't miss her he missed how she made him feel. She locked her phone and put it back in her bag. The bartender brought them their drinks and Tom continued with silence. It only took a few sips of wine for her to gather herself. She turned towards tom sitting next to her. She faced her body towards him to give him her full attention. He followed suit and smiled an almost real smile. "Thank you for accepting my invitation" She started with that. "I was happy to, thank you inviting me" He said with a soft smile. "How was your day today?" He said to her and she almost snorted into her wine. "It was great had some interviews some book stuff to do but it all went well" She said completely leaving her encounter with Henry from her thoughts and the conversation. They continued to exchange pleasantries as they drank. By the second glass of wine she was better and was ready to get on with their date and so was he. As they reached the restaurant he opened her door and walked close to her his hand hovering close to her back. Close but not touching. He was being guarded and she noticed. They were seated and given menus and more wine. The restaurant was small, private and Italian. Amelia's favorite kind. After the order was given and the waiter had left she got brave. She scooted to be directly next to him. She was going to have to lead this conversation and she planned to open him up. "I like this place, do you come here a lot" he smiled "No actually only a few times with friends and family" Short again. "I love Italian food almost as much as I love Italian deserts" he smiled. He was struggling with something. Something big. fuck it, she thought she was going in deep and didn't care how this went. "Why are you so closed off?" He was taken aback by her bluntness "I can see it. You are physically holding yourself back and I want to know why" She wasn't mean or demanding. She was soft and caring. To show this she put her hand on his. He looked down at their hands and he cupped her fingers in response. They held hands for a few min before he spoke. He didn't want to say it but she wanted to know and he was always honest. "I was told that I too much. Too passionate, too open just too much and that if I ever wanted to have a true relationship I needed to tone myself down and learn to be more like other men." He said it like he had been reciting those words for ages, he was carrying this for far too long. She didn't say anything she knew that this was a big moment for him saying all of this out loud and to a semi stranger no less. He drank the rest of his wine and pour himself some more and refilled her glass as well. Their hands still connected. The sipped in silence for seconds. Amelia moved her hand and turned to him. Looking him straight on. He didn't want to turn, he was holding it in and if he looked at her at his most vulnerable he might break. She reached up and touched his face. Her hands were small and warm even in the cold of the London weather. He closed his eyes trying to take in every inch of her heat. She turned his face to look at her and smiled. "That's total bull shit" The way her face lit up when she said it made him smile. A true Tom Hiddleston smile. They laughed for a moment and the tension dissipated. The food arrived and they ate with small tidbits of conversation. She didn't have to lead it either. As they finished the food and paid the check they stood closer together. They were on a date now lots of smiling and stolen glances and gentle touching of each other's hand or arms. As they exited Tom gently put his hand on the small of her back and the touch warmed Amelia. They drove through London not knowing where he was taking her next. "have you done any tourist things while you are here?" he said much more relaxed than the beginning of the date, "Yes a few things, but no one will go on the Eye with me so that was a bit of a bummer for me." He smiled at her "Well darling we can't have that." He said changing lanes. He took her on the eye and paid for a private ride. Amelia didn't want to tell him that she was terrified of heights because she really wanted to do this. It was a bucked list item of hers but she was scared of heights. As they creeped towards the top she got closed to him. "Afraid of heights?" he said from behind her, He towered over her five foot nothing stature. "yes" she said in almost a whisper. Moments later she felt his arms around her. "I've got you little darling" he whispered in her ear. She was taken with him. In that moment she opened her eyes that she hadn't realized were ever closed and saw the beautiful view. He held her like this for the rest of the ride and kissed her temple before holding his hand out for her to walk out of the ride. They walked back to car different people, in a different situation. He took her to past a few more sights holding hands the whole time. As the darkness descended they drove to a different part of London. He parked his car and walked around to open her door. "Where are we going now?" She asked He smiled bigger than before " I thought a walk through the park would be appropriate" reminiscing of the moment that they met in that dark wet night not too long ago. They walked the edge of the Thames in quite comfort. Here in the darkness he held her hand. Within the last few hours he felt more free than he had in the past few years. The finally found a place to sit and talk as the moon light illuminated them. They talked about their past, their families and their work. When all generic topics were exhausted they moved on to favorite movies, shows, and literature. Tom was floored to know that she didn't have great knowledge of Shakespeare but loved how passionate she was about Van Gogh. He watched her closely she was easy to read and open to him. It had been a long time since someone had been so genuine to him. She listened so attentively when he talked about his loves and his passions. " How many children do you have" he asked her "Three" it made his heart soar how her face lit up when she talked about her children. "Do you want more?" She raised an eye brow at him and he wondered if he went too far. "Are you offering?" He coughed at her response. "No... well... no darling I was just curious. My sister has three children and she said she would never have more because three is more than enough" "I am open to the idea of children" It was short and sweet but she knew that it was a question he needed to ask. Something for himself to make sure that the possibility was there for himself. It wasn't an indicator of commitment or his feelings more of an interview question to gage where she was in her own life. Not personal. "Should we head back " He asked curing himself mentally for even bringing it up but the cold had settled and she had started to tremble a few min before. "yes please" she said quietly. They walked back with her shaking due to the weather. he wrapped his arms around her in comfort and she warmed a bit. He drove her back to the hotel and walked her up to her room. "Thank you for dinner.. and for.. everything" She looked up at him standing so close to her. He could smell his cologne it smelled amazing. She wanted to kiss him but she was scared. They stood on a ledge of something. He listen to her soft breaths He wanted to get lost in her but he was still holding back. "You are welcome darling." He didn't kiss her instead he took her hand to his lips and kissed it. He said his good night and she watched him get into the elevator. She waited until the doors closed to lean again the wall next to her door and release the breath that she had been holding.
She composed herself and put the key card in the door but didn't turn the handle before it was flung open. "You have company" Tracy said. She looked pale and like she had been waiting. A look of confusion crossed your face but before you could ask who she responded "He's in your bedroom" Henry. He was here. How had he found her. "I will be awake until he leaves" She nodded silently knowing what she meant. She walked towards the door to her but before she could turn the door knob again the door flung open. There he stood with a look of This anger mixed with something else something that she couldn't quite place. "how was your date?" She knew that Tracy hadn't told him she never would. He was spying on her "Are you spying on me?" she said anger rising. she walked into the room and closed the door. he walked to her closing the space in few steps. "Yes because you stopped responding to me" he was seething and he needed release. Her next words shocked her "I release you from our contract-"he barreled towards her taking her shoulders and squeezing tightly "I don't want to be released. You are mine-"she shook herself out of his hold "I belong to NO ONE, Henry Cavill" she raised her voice and he raised an eyebrow standing her ground. She knew why he was here. He wanted release from his anger and he wanted to hate fuck her just like she had the night her rejected her. But she was not willing to play this game with him anymore. "I can't do this anymore Henry" her tone was sad a visible change that he didn't like. "I don't want to play this game anymore. I played it for a long time and I was good at it. But I lost this time and the loss was too much" She sat on the bed watching him. "I want more" Three words that caused him so much grief. He wanted her all of her he would never admit it to her but it was true. But he focused now on getting what he wanted from her now. It took moments but he formulated a plan, he released a breath that he was holding and knelt in front of her. She was crying sitting legs crossed on edge of the bed. He held her face in his hands and wiped away her tears with his thumbs. "shh I know what you want and I am sorry for what I said before. But I am scared of this too..". She looked up at him finally eye filled with tears. "I don't want to get hurt and I don't want to hurt you" His heart twinge with guilt it was true he didn't want to hurt her but he knew he couldn't give in to her want so he lied, he knew if she caught on she would be done for good. He needed a change of plan and he needed it now so he did the one thing he rarely ever did. He kissed her. It was intoxicating and made her head swim. That was all it took. Her body took over as her mind was taken over by him. Every emotion she felt for him came back like the ocean crashing over her. She wanted him, more than he wanted her. She wanted to give in and let him take her but the memory of Tom's lips on her hand made her stop. "No, I can't do this Henry you need to leave." She got up and opened the door of her bedroom. He rolled his eyes and followed her in hopes of changing her mind but she was already at the door of her room holding the door open. "Leave... please" She said quietly not looking at him. He grabbed his coat and walked to the door. He held her chin and forced her to look at him. Those eyes burned into her, "I miss you, love" he kissed her softly on the cheek and left. A ploy to convince her she was sure she closed the door and walked to the sofa to collapse. Tracy opened the door to her room and walked to her looking at her broken friend. It took everything for her to do what she did and she knew, that. "Ice cream and cry?" Amelia nodded her head. Tracy left and came back with 3 pints of different ice cream and spoons. "Ice cream and cry" Amelia said.
The next morning Amelia thanked all the Gods that she had gone for ice cream and not liquor. She woke early and went down to the gym working her body until it hurt punishing for letting Henry kiss her but it also reminded her that last night did happen and Henry was watching her. She should have known that he would not let her out of this contract without his end of the bargain satisfied but she hoped that for now she could just keep him away until she could figure out what to do.
She only had three more days in London and she spent them with Tom. He was blossoming with words and actions. His love language was touch which consequently so was Amelia's. So after two days of caresses, hugs and hand holding she was infatuated and falling fast. Any thought of Henry and her subsequent drunken break down was forgotten. The day before her departure which was early in the morning Tom asked her to come over to his home so he could make her dinner she accepted happily. They had now known each other for a total of a week and she was happily in like with Tom. As she arrived at his house with a bottle of wine in her bag she got a bit nervous as thoughts of Henry crept into her mind. Was he still watching? was he really missing her? Tom greeted her and welcomed her into his house. It was very clean modern and bachelor like. She smiled as she say her books on his book shelf seeing them well-worn was always a high for her because it showed that the reader enjoyed them. As she walked through his open floor plan home she felt very at ease. Tom as incredibly sweet and flirty and she liked that about him. She wanted to do more than touch and hugs but she didn't want to push his boundaries. She had always jumped to sex so this was new for her and she really wasn't sure when a kiss or more was appropriate anymore. She entered his kitchen to watch as he prepared their lunch. He was quite the chef or at least she thought from what she saw. He poured her some wine and himself. He seemed a bit more nervous today then the last few days. On edge or maybe she was. She jumped up on his counter to continue to observe and he smirked at her "That was a big jump love" It was meant as a term of endearment she knew that but the word just rolled off this tongue and made her feel something else. He caught the blush she had from his words. The past days all he could think of was kissing her. He thought about her lips, the way she laughed, the way she danced when she heard a song she liked. He wanted to kiss her today and he was determined but he was also nervous. " I know I'm surprised I made it" He chuckled. He took the pan of food off the burner and moved it into the oven. "well this has to sit in there for twenty min then we will be ready to eat." she smiled and took another sip of her wine. He decided that this was the moment and he went for it. "So what should we do now, Love" he said seductively as he walked towards her on the counter. She watched him carefully, gaging his intentions. He slithered towards her until he stood in front of her. He put his hands on her legs and she opened and made space for him. His touch was hot and she could feel it burning her even though the thick material of her jeans. She was aroused by him and she was enthralled. He his face was so close and he stopped giving her the opportunity to lean in before he did. But she wanted him to take control. That's what she liked and so he complied. She put her hands on his chest but made no moves to stop him instead she wrapped her arms around neck thrusting her finger into his hair and the nape of his neck. She closed her eyes and like instinct he leaned in and closed the gap. The kiss was quick but meaningful. He put every ounce of passion into that one soft kiss and she felt it all the way to her core. They disconnected and he looked at her seeking permission for more. This time she closed the gap and the passion flood swept over them. They were wrapped up in each other for the twenty min it took for their food to cook. They separated out of breath and finally sated. This kiss was different for Amelia, something changed in her this was a different type of passion that she had not had in a long time. Tom kissed her softly once more before moving to the oven to remove their food. She touched her lips and he turned they felt electric and she was grinning ear to ear. He was flushed from their exchange and she loved it. He placed the food on the stove and turned to her with a sexy smile. "I'm not really hungry quite yet" That was all that he said her smile indicated that she was on the same wavelength. In two steps he was back in her arms and their lips were together again. His kiss was like breathing again. He picked her up off the counter and she wrapped her legs around his waist. He walked them to the living room and gently placed her on the lounge chair and rested on top of her. They continued the make out session without a sense of time. Things were increasing with every kiss there were no words just touches and wordless permission given. She noticed that Tom did nothing without her consent even if it was just a nod or a kiss in response. Eventually he was extremely aroused and there was no hiding it. She wanted to reason that they had had a total of 3 dates and typically people could have sex now but she stopped herself. She wanted this to be different and how to could it be different if she just jumped to sex with him. There was also the issue of Henry that she had skirted around and she needed to tell him. She broke the kiss and settled next to him as he adjusted himself. He kissed her softly as they laid in comfortable silence holding her. "Are you hungry now darling" she laughed out loud "Yes I am" They sat up and composed themselves and soon were sitting at his table. He served proudly and gave her more wine. They ate and talked but he eventually put his utensils down and Amelia knew he was going to ask. "Darling, why did you stop me on the couch?" She took a deep breath. He watched her waiting patiently for her to speak. She was not going to insult him by lying. She finished her wine and spoke "Tom, I like you, a lot." He didn't like where this was going already and frowned. She noticed and put her hand in his " I have to be honest with you about some things. Before you, before this I didn't date anyone." he was calm and waiting for more "After Derek died I never thought that I would ever love anyone again nor did I want to even try. But as a young single woman I still wanted affection" She was cringing internally. She didn't know why this was so hard to tell him. She wasn't ashamed of her story but for some reason she was afraid that he would be ashamed. Nothing on his face so she continued. "So since then I had affairs. not many but all included a contract and NDA. It was a very specific set of rules that I liked to follow that included some BDSM things." He raised an eyebrow and she stopped. "Darling, are you trying to tell me that you had sex with men but no relationships or what you in America call booty calls/? Because if that the case there is really nothing to be ashamed of. You are a free adult woman, your sexuality or your sexual preferences is not for me to judge." she smiled at him. Sweet naïve man. "Tom, I have a contract now. with someone I obviously can't say who. But this situation is different. He dominates me and controls me in so many ways not just sexually." She said it and it took him a min to understand. "He is your dominant?" she nodded in response. His eyes went dark, he knew that she was lost in this relationship with Henry. He was dominating her and she couldn't let go because she had fallen for her dominator. "Has he hurt you more than you consented?" His jaw tensed the thought of her being mistreated made his loose his mind. "Not physically" Tom knew that she was not being completely honest because the emotional pain he had caused was more than the physical pain. She didn't want to cry but the thought of Henry made her ache physically and mentally. She bowed her head and let the tears fall, She let him see her cry, even though she didn't want to burden him with her pain. . He got out of his chair and picked her up bridal style as she wrapped her arms around his neck. He placed her gently on the same couch she sat on the day he found her out in the rain. He sat in front of her on the ottoman. "Amelia, look at me darling" she did as he said her brown eye glistening. He smiled at her and caressed her face with his hand. "How long has it been since you've been made love to" She didn't have to try and remember. She knew exactly how long, the day before Derek died it was imprinted in her mind forever. The tears fell faster but not for Henry. This time they were for her true pain. The truth of it was that she liked to be punished because the pain made her remember that she was still in pain from loss. She had gone through every step of grief but she didn't want to let the pain of his loss go. Tom knew the answer too without having to hear anything. He held her as she cried he would hold her forever if she let him and in that moment he realized how much he meant that. She looked up at him the sadness evident "kiss me " she pleaded. He would ever refuse her and he knew that now so he complied. The kiss was sad but still filled with passion. He kissed her as if his lips could heal her broken heart. "let me show you how to be loved again." It had been a week but she knew how she felt about him and he knew how he felt about her. That's all that mattered. "yes" she said. He picked her up and took her to his bed and made love to her so gently. She had not been cared for like that in a long time. They spent the night tangled in each other and he held her until he could hear the soft breathing indicating that she was asleep which he then allowed himself to follow her to sleep. As he knew he would follow her now where ever she would lead.