Chapter 21:
Suffocated
"Okay, so I slept on what you were saying about me going to Amelia's party and I just can't do it." I tell Steven, sitting in the passenger seat of his car.
"Lola..." Steven groans, hitting his head in frustration against the steering wheel.
Today is Friday, the day of Amelia's party. Since telling Steven he has been trying to convince me to go.
"We've been going through this all week. You need to go!" He emphasises.
"I just don't see what good it will do. Anyway surely it isn't a good idea if you think that it's part of Amelia's plan to take me down." I complain.
"Do we really have to go through this again?" He looks at me.
"If you go she'll be so pleased, not in a 'yay my best friend is here' kind of way, more of a she'll attach you to a lead all night showing off to the school that you guys are now best friends."
"Yes because that will certainly please Zac and can you imagine how George will react? Please tell me you didn't tell the whole group about the invite." I interrupt.
"No of course not, only me and Zac know. Let me finish. So let's say you go to the party, Amelia will wear you as an accessory and try to dig you out, find out every gossip and secret you have-"
I gulp, if anyone is going to find out the truth and all of my secrets, Amelia will be by far the worst.
"Steven, that's not a good idea."
"Lola, you're missing the point. What you do is you lie. Make some dark secret up. That way when she tries to take you down, the group can then start the plan where we ruin her life and expose the truth. The whole school would completely turn against her again. Imagine, Amelia spreading serious lies about the school sweetheart Lola. Before we know it, she'll be gone again and this time for good." He smiles as he focuses on the road ahead of him.
"Steven I just can't, the plan is too risky. I don't want to lose everything."
He groans again.
"And anyway it's Blake's birthday today, I can't bail on the group plans tonight for Amelia's party."
"I understand. I'm sorry I pushed you. I'm just as sick of her as George is. I hate that she's sat with us all week meaning that George hasn't set foot in the cafeteria."
"I know. All week she's been questioning me about the party, I've been putting it off. We'll figure something out. George can't stay away from the cafeteria forever, he gets too hungry." I joke.
Steven lets out a laugh as we pull into the parking lot, the rest of the group standing outside the main entrance.
"HAPPY BIRTHDAY BLAKEY BABY!" Steven bellows as we lock his car, walking towards the others.
"Morning sunshine." Zac says, gently kissing my lips.
"Morning." I reply back, the smile on my face mirroring his.
"How does it feel to be old?" Steven continues joking, punching his shoulder.
"Give it a rest, I may be getting old and fragile but I can still do this." Blake pulls Steven into a headlock, ruffling his hair with his knuckles.
"Happy birthday Blake!" I say over all of the chaos.
"Thank you Lola." He smiles back.
Sophie stands next to him looking proud. She's carrying multiple gift bags because like always, she's spoilt him to pieces. Happiness is radiating from her skin, something I haven't seen from her in a while.
"I still can't believe you're not having a party. You're 18 Blake. Chicks in the UK go crazy about 18th birthdays, isn't that right Lola." Kieran says.
"Oh yeah. When my cousin turned 18, she got so drunk that she ended up being carried home by the rugby team from her school." I laugh, it's one of the only good drunk stories I have from back home.
"That's my dream." Zara jokes.
"If Blake was having a party then I could be the one to carry you home and that'd be like all of your dreams come true." George says arrogantly.
"Keep telling yourself that." Zara replies, rolling her eyes before hugging into his side.
"Come on Blake, you and Sophie are the King and Queen of parties here." Kieran says, my mind turns back to Amelia telling me the same thing on Monday.
"You only turn 18 once." George pleads.
"I'd love to but you all know that Amelia's throwing her party tonight and the whole school are going. All because she didn't invite any of us doesn't mean that we can't still have a good night together." Blake replies.
"She did invite one of us..." Steven says carefully.
My eyes widen as I turn to look at him, shooting him a glare. Zac puts his arm around me because he knows just as well as I do that the truth is about to come out and it more than likely won't go down well.
"Who?" George demands.
"She invited me on Monday." I reply, staring at my feet, I can't bear to look them in the eyes.
"She what?" Sophie says in disbelief, more than anything she sounds hurt.
"She told me you guys weren't invited and I knew straight away I wouldn't go. You guys are my best friends, I couldn't do that to you. Besides, it's Blake's birthday, I wouldn't miss it for the world." I look up and face all of the eyes staring back at me.
He shoots me a smile and I shyly smile back.
"I can't believe this. Why is she trying so hard to befriend you?" George says.
"Erm hello? Isn't it obvious? Lola is one of the most popular girls at this school and didn't know Amelia when it all went wrong last year. Of course she'll use that to climb her way back to the top." Steven answers.
George huffs, he lacked the energy to get angry over Amelia anymore. Zac kisses the top of my head, making sure I feel his comfort. Sophie stares at me, a scared look in her eye.
"Look it doesn't matter, I'm not going anyway." I shrug.
"Exactly. Today let's just forget about her. Everyone come to my pool house tonight, 8pm. Pizza, beer, games. Let's celebrate the best way we can."
***
I pucker my lips to apply my nude coloured lipstick whilst Sophie teases her curls, styling her hair. We both sit in front of the mirror in Sophie's bedroom, getting ready to head to Blake's.
"You don't think we're over dressing do you?" I say as I pull my grey, wrap around skirt down.
"Of course not! It's still Blake's birthday. Better to overdress than underdress." She replies.
Sophie is wearing a nude crop top with a nude coloured, latex skirt which had a zip running down the front. She's aiming to spoil Blake as much as possible and with those clothes, I know it'll definitely work.
She's convinced the whole group to dress up too. I'm wearing a grey skirt, with a low cut, white vest, paired with a gold necklace which had my star sign on. However, I'm bringing my grey cardigan for comfort.
"I'm quite excited for the group to just hang out together, like normal. It'll be the first time since starting school again." I say.
"Me too. I'm not too bothered about a party. I just want it to be like the summer again, where we can joke about and enjoy each other's company. It's what our group's all about."
"What do you think you'll do for your 18th?" I ask, even though her birthday isn't until February.
"I'll definitely have a party. You know I love throwing them and as you saw from your welcome party, they can be pretty wild. Well apart from situations like the Liam one." She says, looking embarrassed.
"I still had a great time anyway." I turn to smile at her, not allowing the thought of Liam to get to me; he is not worth it.
She smiles back, picking up her hoop earrings to complete her look.
"I can't believe Amelia invited you to her party." She said, not looking at me, whilst placing the back onto the earring.
"I know. I'm sorry I didn't tell you, I just didn't want the group to go into meltdown mode. I didn't see it as a massive deal, I knew I'd never go." I pause what I am doing to look down at her in the mirror.
"Oh Lola, I'm not mad at you. Please don't think that. I don't think any of us are. It's mostly frustration at Amelia. I know what she's like and as Steven said, she's trying to use you."
"It's such a weird situation. She's trying really hard and at times it genuinely looks like she cares and wants to be my friend."
"Trust me, she doesn't." Sophie warns.
"You've never told me what it was like to be friends with her." I question.
"There's a reason behind that." She laughs but the same worried look returns to her face from this morning.
"Hey, talk to me." I softly say, turning my body to face her.
"It's a long story." She says, turning to face me back.
"We've got time, it's another 10 minutes until Steven picks us up."
"There's not much to say. As you know, before she got kicked out she was the most popular girl in school. It was strange, whilst everyone adored her, at the same time they could see who she really was. Mean, horrible, manipulating. So in some ways her popularity was due to the fear of being her enemy. She'd ruin your life."
I've heard this from many people in the group and I am finally beginning to realise just how lucky I am to have not met Amelia up until now.
"I was the same, terrified she'd turn against me. I guess she just used that to her advantage and I suppose I was young and naive, that's all." She continues.
"What do you mean?" I ask, trying to dig deeper.
"She bought me into the group. I was a shy and insecure 14 year old, with a huge crush on Blake, he seemed way out of my league. I met Amelia through cheerleading. I made it onto the squad and I knew no one, I hid in the background and she made it her mission to change that. I loved her at first, she felt like the best friend I'd never had. She introduced me to the others and just like when you arrived, they were nothing but welcoming-"
I smile at the thought of lunch on my first day. Meeting and learning the different personalities of everyone. It was a whirlwind but I'd do anything to relive that day. Tell that scared new girl that everything is going to be okay, that I'll be safe this time around, that these people won't ruin my life like before.
"I was so caught up in loving my new life and I hate to admit it but the attention I was getting at the time was amazing, any 14 year old would love to go from nothing to popular. I was beginning to not feel invisible anymore and Blake was noticing me. What I didn't realise at the time was that I was a project. A project to make her look good. Amelia was making me into the person I became to give others the hope that she'd do the same for them. Drawing other girls in like beggars at her feet."
"So she used you?" I ask frowning as the frustration begins to creep up on me.
"I guess you could say that. The worst part was the way she treated me. After she left I realised that she was nothing but trouble and that all this time she'd been crushing me. I felt suffocated."
"What do you mean how she treated you? Sophie what did she do to you?" I could feel the heat radiating off of my cheeks.
"I did everything for her. Carried her books, did her homework, paid for lunch, nails, trips, anything she wished for. Every week before cheerleading practise, she'd make me braid her hair. There were certain things she wouldn't allow me to do like wear certain clothes, eat certain things, paint my nails a certain colour. She wouldn't let me look better than her. It's why I value things a lot more now, like dressing up for tonight."
I look at Sophie's outfit again and suddenly I see her beauty for what it really is. It's real and very pure.
"One time, she thought I was getting too close to Zac, she thought we were flirting. You'll know more than anyone that I don't see Zac as anything more than a friend and as I said and still am, I was besotted by Blake. She was so mad that she blocked my number, exposed me on the school feed, she wouldn't even let me sit at the table for a whole week. I was alone. After she forgave me, she made me do everything for her that whole week, I felt like I was going to work, not school. But I was so desperate to be close to Blake and keep the friends I'd gained that I brushed it off. I never understood how bad it was until she left."
"She treated you like her slave..." I say shocked.
"I guess so. It's why I'm on edge whenever she's around and why I had the courage to stand up to her on that first day. I don't need her to be the person I am. She got me to where I am but I have stayed there because of who I am inside. I hope to God she doesn't do the same to you, it's why I look so worried when you tell us the stuff you do."
I grab her and pull her into the tightest hug I can possibly give. I feel enraged at what she's told me. The fact that someone was capable of treating my best friend like dirt. Who did Amelia think she was?
All I know right now is that I am done playing her games and I'm for sure done being kind.
"I'm so sorry that happened to you." I say, holding her tight.
"It's okay. It's happened and now I just focus on using it to make me mentally stronger. I never knew how I'd react if she'd return, but if anything it's pushing me to keep going. I need you to promise me something though. Promise me that you won't ever let her get to you like she did to me. Don't fear what will happen if you stand up for yourself, you'll always have all of us behind you."
"Trust me, I want nothing to do with that girl. I am so mad about this. George was right, she is poison. If anything, I promise you that she will never be able to do that to you or any other girl at Oakmore again."
We hear a knock at the door meaning that Steven has arrived to pick us up. As we head down the stairs and walk towards his car, everyone acts like their happy, usual selves but me. I can't get over what Sophie has told me, Amelia has finally crossed a line.
"Ready to go?" Steven says, holding the car door open for me.
"Yep." I say unenthusiastically.
Steven grabs my arm, forcing me to look at him, a worried look on his face. I look back, frowning, hoping he'll telepathically understand what is going on in my head. And as if something clicked, he suddenly realises what was wrong. He can now see that I am very, very angry.
***
Blake's pool house sits at the end of his garden. It is a long, white building, paved with stone outside. Inside, in the middle is a small room with armchairs and a huge fireplace, it's perfect for summer evenings, disconnected from the rest of the world. To the left and right of the living room is also a small, modern kitchen and bathroom, making it perfect for nights like tonight.
The September evening air is warm and as we walk into the pool house to meet the rest of the group, the nostalgia of summer hit me.
"You're here!" Blake loudly says, walking over from the kitchen to greet us after he pops open his beer bottle.
He's decorated the room with banners and balloons whilst 3 pizza boxes sit open on the kitchen island. Loud dance music fills the house.
Sophie walks up to Blake, cuddling into his side. He sits down in one of the armchairs with Sophie on his lap. Steven sits next to Kieran and begins chatting away. Unsurprisingly, George and Zara are gathered by the pizza, pointing and discussing the different toppings.
The whole group has made an effort tonight. The boys are dressed in shirts or smart tops paired with skinny or ripped jeans. Zara also looks gorgeous, wearing black, leather pants with a red cropped vest, complimenting her skin tone perfectly.
"You look incredible." Zac says, walking up to me before kissing me gently.
He's wearing a blue and white plaid shirt with grey skinny jeans. His hair is slightly ruffled and he stands smiling at me with two drinks in hand.
I smile back and take the drink, trying to enjoy myself, but the weight of knowing what Amelia did to Sophie feels like it's crushing me.
"You okay gorgeous?" Zac asks, concerned.
"Can I speak to you?" I say, eager to get away.
"Sure." He replies, taking my hand as I lead him outside of the pool house.
"What's wrong?" He asks whilst cupping my face.
We stand on the grass next to the pool. Our reflections ripple in the water. The light night sky sitting above us as the crickets chirp around us.
"Sophie told me about how Amelia treated her today." I seeth.
"Okay?" Zac says, not understanding the problem.
"Never in my life have I heard about one of my friends being treated so poorly. Amelia treated her like a personal assistant rather than a friend. My mum treated me better in the time she neglected us."
The words come out of my mouth before I have time to think. Zac takes hold of my hands, shocked at what I have said.
"Wait what?" He says.
"It's nothing." I say brushing it off, Sophie's more important right now.
"No Lola, tell me." He asks.
"It's nothing big. My mum went off the rails when my dad walked out a few years back. She locked herself away which left me to look after Lily on my own. It's okay, we're fine now." I tell the story quickly, I don't care about it enough right now to go into more detail.
"Lola, you should've told me this stuff. That must've affected you so much." He replies with sympathy, pulling me into his arms.
Of course it affected me. It affected me more than anyone knows. When I lost control it was bad and there are consequences I'm still suffering from and consequences I'm still hiding from. I know I should tell him to be more open but for now I am protecting him and our relationship by not telling him the full truth.
"Zac this isn't the issue right now. It's what Amelia has done to Sophie. Can't you see how much this affects her?" I pull away from the hug.
"Obviously, I saw it happening at the time but no one could tell Sophie in fear of Amelia. No one has mentioned it since as we don't want to upset her. We've all tried to protect her as much as we can. But you have to understand that there's nothing we can do about it. It's happened now and all we can do is help Sophie move on and stop Amelia ever doing it again." He reassures.
I look up at him, sadness filling my eyes as the feeling of helplessness overwhelms me. I hate to admit it, but I know he's right. I need to forget about it for now otherwise it'll put me in a bad mood for the rest of the night and the last thing I want is to ruin Blake's birthday.
"Please try and forget about it for now and then tomorrow we'll speak about it more okay? Let's go back inside." He says, leading me back in.
"Blake, I still can't believe that we aren't partying tonight." Kieran moans.
The group sit in seats next to the fireplace. Some sit on their phones, others sit in their own conversations. The mood seems rather miserable.
"Kieran, there was nothing I could do. I'm sure someone else will have a party for their birthday. What about you Zac, your birthday's in November?" Blake replies.
"I'm not too sure. I'm not bothered about all that attention though and I doubt my mom will let me. I'll probably just do something with Lola." He looks down at me with a grin.
"Woah, have you guys seen the feed?" Steven says, looking up from his phone.
"No?" George replies.
"Everyone is going crazy about the fact that we're not at Amelia's party."
"You're right!" Zara says after spending a minute checking the feed.
"What are they saying?" George asks, taking her phone.
Blake runs over to turn down the music. Zac takes out his phone to check and I lean over to look too.
'This party is so dead without Blake, Zac and the rest of them here.' One reads.
'Wish Blake had thrown a party tonight, would've been way better. His birthday was always the better birthday.' Another reads.
"Have you seen this one?" Kieran hysterically laughs.
"It says 'This party proves that Amelia is nothing without her group. This is so awkward. No wonder the group doesn't want her back.' Can you believe it?"
"No way!" Sophie joins in laughing.
"Everyone wants us to be there." Steven says.
"What do we do? Do we let the people down?" George asks, a suggestive tone in her voice.
"Blake?" Sophie says, looking up at Blake.
Blake is quiet for a moment, he's deep in thought, contemplating what to do. One side of him wants to spend his birthday the way he's planned it but the otherside knows that he is a people pleaser.
After a moment of silence, a mischievous smile creeps across his face.
"Let's gatecrash this party."