Holland.
I screamed, I hit the walls- I made my mom and Ashton disappear, I cursed God, I broke the mirrors and window just by simply touching them.
"I want to be awake- let me out of here" I screamed to no one, not being able to control myself- I had to have been going fucking insane- this shit wasn't real.
Michael.
"It's got to be her- I have enough medicine in her system to knock a grown man out." The anesthesiologists spoke confidentially.
I knew she was numb, there's no way in hell she could feel it- so I wasn't worried about her feeling anything.
"Put a curtain up." I spoke- knowing her seeing her open hip if she were to wake up- would be traumatic.
I watched as the nurses did that.
"Doctor Clifford" Moran spoke again, making me want to slam my head into a window.
Holland, stop fighting your medicine.
"What?" I asked, trying my hardest to finish quickly so we could get her out of here.
"She's having a nightmare- her brain waves are going insane- we need to wake her up." He spoke firmly.
"You want me to wake my patient up as I stitch her up?" I spat towards him, preparing to start my stitches.
"It's better than her having a panic attack in her sleep." He had a solid point.
"Wake her up."
Everyone was dead silent- no one knowing what to do as Luke and the Anesthesiologists started talking to her.
I held gauze over the cut- not stitching yet just in case she moved once she actually woke.
I stepped back, looking at her crying, but sleeping face.
This had never happened to me- I had no idea what the hell was going on, but then there was a gasp- and I watched her hand immediately grab Luke, who started to immediately comfort her as she let out sobs.
Holland.
"Holland, stop." My mom spoke sternly as I screamed to wake up.
"Leave me alone" I cried
Why wasn't she leaving?
Why the fuck wasn't she leaving?
"I am your mother-" "my mother is dead!" I yelled out.
"And so are you!" She yelled back, making me freeze.
"W-what-" "how do you think all of this is possible?" She yelled to me.
"You're fucking dead- you died- get the hell over it!" She yelled in my face as I stood in her room, silent.
"I'm not" I spoke calmly
"Yes you are!" She screamed to me, tugging at the roots of her hair.
"You're fucking dead- and you're stuck with me now!" She was ripping her hair out of her head, screaming- which made my tears immediately start flowing yet again.
"Please stop" I cried.
"Everyone's dead- your dad, Michael, Ashton, Calum and Luke- everyone is fucking dead!" She laughed, steadily ripping her hair out.
I couldn't escape it
This wasn't my mother.
This wasn't my mother.
I sobbed as I watched her go literally insane.
And then I heard Luke
"Holland, sweet girl- wake up, we're right here, wake up" I stood, opening the door and following the voice.
My mom followed me, screaming at me not to leave her- which made me run from her.
She wasn't my mom.
I closed my eyes as I came to a shut door, my hand around the locked door knob as she screamed.
I squeezed my eyes shut, letting tears fall.
"Just open your eyes pretty girl, I'm right here"
I opened my eyes, calling out Luke's name immediately- and actually seeing him- seeing everything I saw before falling asleep- I was back?
Michael.
"Holland, relax." Luke spoke calmly as everyone watched in astonishment as she held onto Luke for dear life- crying into him.
"You're still in surgery princess, Michael has to stitch you up, stay still for him for five more minutes and then we can all talk, okay?" Luke handled the situation well.
"Okay" she sobbed out.
I stitched her as quick as I could, looking to a nurse.
"Go tell Ashton what happened, because he'll be the first to see her" I spoke to a nurse quietly, making her immediately leave.
I put a bandage over her hip, snapping my gloves off and moving to her.
"Holland, stop crying and breathe" I spoke calmly, grabbing her hand, which was reaching out for me.
Her eyes were bloodshot, tears steadily streaming out of them, her hands were clammy and sweaty- which was weird considering the OR was freezing.
"We have to leave you to scrub out-" "please don't leave me alone" she cried out, just as I heard the door open- seeing Calum.
"I'll take her to Ashton"