Chapter 29: (Aubrey's POV)- How'd You Find Me?
"I had nothing with her after you became my babysitter. Before that I did. That's as simple as I make it. If you understand that then great. If not then..." he trailed off while looking down at my eyes.
"Then what?" I asked. I wanted to hear him say it because if he says it, then that makes it real and as much as that would kill me, I need to hear if it's real or not. "Then what, Xavier?" I repeated when he refused to answer.
"Then it'll never work," he spoke calmly yet steadily.
I gasped inaudibly. That genuinely felt like a stab straight to the heart and for a second I wasn't sure that I'd be able to hold in the tears and hurt. "Maybe we're not meant to work."
Please don't agree with me.
"Maybe not." He nodded hesitantly.
I felt my breath get caught in my throat as I nodded, processing his words in detail. "Then I'm sure you can see yourself out." I walked to the door and opened it.
"Bye Aubrey." He walked up to me before giving me a sad smile and heading out.
As soon as he left, I shut the door and let out a sigh while leaning against it. I need to think and I need to do it clearly and that can't be done in this house. I ran up the stairs and changed into grey sweats and a hoodie before pulling my hair up in a bun and throwing my converse back on. I ran into my garage where my bike was and headed out for the cliffside.
Lately, it seems to be the one place where my brain works right. I rode for ten minutes before I got to the woods where I walked my bike through with me. I set it against a tree right before the clearing and faced the view to see someone sitting there with their feet dangling off.
That someone is a guy. That, someone, was not Peter, that someone was a brunette with fluffy hair that flew as the wind flirted with it. That, someone, had a cigarette loosely hanging from his lips, blowing out smoke every few seconds.
I took a deep inhale before walking over and sitting down beside him, crossing my legs. I sighed as I turned to him and snatched the cigarette from him, throwing it off the cliff.
He blew out his final breath of smoke before turning to me. He wasn't surprised in the least that I was here. "How'd you find me?" he asked staring straight ahead at the beautiful view of the lights in the town while the moonlight reflected and shone, bouncing back off the ocean below it.
"I didn't. I come here to think," I informed him. "Always." I turned to the view.
"I can leave if you want me to. I don't think you exactly want me here," he spoke a little hurt shining through his voice.
"You don't think at all. I'm not surprised," I countered.
"You scared the shit out of me when I heard creeks behind me. Then I saw the bike."
I let out a chuckle making his head turn to me. I saw the small smile on his lips from the corner of my eyes as I blushed from his gaze burning into my face.
"It'll work, Aubrey. If we want it to," he spoke softly.
"Hmm," I hummed. "How'd you find this place? Since when?" I questioned him.
"I found it with Ace a few months ago. I know you found it as a kid, I saw you entering the woods all the time here. Then I found the clearing and finally understood why you came here." He sighed.
"Do we want it bad enough to make it work, Xavier?" I turned my head to him to find him already looking straight at me. "It's barely been two weeks. Barely," I emphasized.
"Feels like longer though. Isn't that what's more important. What it feels like to us?" He lay down.
I sat in silence for a moment, thinking of how to phrase my words. This can't be said positively, whatsoever. So I think I'm just gonna have to be honest and say it. "I don't know if I can trust you as I did again," I spoke while staring ahead before turning to him.
"That's fine, I get it. You're not wrong to do that. But just trust me a little, Aubrey. At least think of what I said as a possibility. You're going off of what people think of me. But I'm asking you right now. What do you think of me?" he questioned.
What do I think of him? I think he's an amazing person off of how he treated me. And as much as I don't agree with the whole friends with benefits thing, he's not the only person doing it or has done it before it's common in my generation and I find that to be so very tragic.
"I think you're one of the best people I've known, Xavier." I lay down beside him. "I don't agree with some things that you've done or do but that doesn't mean you're a bad person. And as much as I hate to admit it, you're right. I am going off of what people think and say about you when I shouldn't. You've done nothing but been nice to me and made me happy in all the time that I've known you, leaving the first few annoying days aside." I spoke, making him chuckle lowly. "And because of that, I'm willing to try again," I sighed. I watched as a grin formed on his lips. "Now before you get all into the moment, I'm gonna give you a reminder that you have roughly ten minutes before your mom gets back from her date." I sat up.
He shot up while cursing under his breath. "Shit, um- thanks I'll see you later!" he exclaimed before running back in the direction of his house.
I know I told him I'm willing to try again, and I am! Just not from the couple aspect. I wanna start from square one, back to the basics. Back to being strangers. Back to me just being the babysitter he didn't want. Back to being his friend. If I ever was one. I stayed there at the cliffside for another fifteen or so minutes, listening to music before I finally decided to head back home.
I got on the bike after getting out of the woods and plugged my earphones in, beginning to bike but before I could do so, my phone rang and it was Xavier. "Hey, are you home yet?" he asked through the phone as I biked.
"I'm leaving the cliffside right now, why?" I asked in confusion while keeping my eyes ahead and on the street.
"I just wanted to confirm some things from the conversation we had," he spoke hesitantly. I told him to clear his doubts. "So, I take it you want to start from the beginning?" he asked.
"Correct. From about two days into me babysitting you. That's when we became-" I struggled to find the right words.
"Friends. That's when we became friends," he spoke for me.
"Something like that I guess. So until everything is completely sorted, we're just friends," I stated.
"I don't think we can ever be just friends but alright. So does that mean you'll continue seeing Peter? Or hanging out with Peter, whatever you want to call it?" he questioned curiously.
"Until Peter gives me a reason to stay away from him? Yeah. Or you." I paused choosing my words wisely. "Or until you give me a reason to stay away from him," I spoke slightly teasingly.
Always leave him wanting more, ladies. Always.
"And what kind of reason should that be?" I could hear his freaking smirk.
"Whatever kind of reason you want it to be. I would stay away from him just because you asked me if you prove you care about me enough." I smiled to myself. "If you prove that you're the better guy. You have to show me you're the better one." I dared him.
"And if I do? Then you're mine. Can we agree on that condition or do you just know for a fact that I'll win?" he challenged back.
This is where we become explosive. We both are competitive and we both want things to work our way. When we challenge each other, shit is going to go down.
"I want you to win, Parker. But I'll continue seeing Peter until you can prove to me that you're the right one. Prove it, and I'm yours." I smirked to myself as I pulled into my driveway. I got off my bike as I heard nothing but silence from his side. I placed my phone in my pocket as I unlocked my door.
I heard him sigh, probably thinking of what to say and what words to use. "You'll be mine, Carthy. And you know it."
*
*
*
*
*