okay i think i'll put a trigger warning since i cried myself writing those scenes lmao
❌ so trigger warning; highkey emotional
if you're sensitive to sad shit, just skip this chapter i feel like i should say that since i'm still getting lots of complaints that this story is too sad
***
"Just in case he doesn't make it?", Lyza let out in a small voice, "What are you trying to say Taehyung?!"
"It's your son, Lyz. You will have to raise him if Jungkook-", Taehyung gulped, looking away while one of the nurses in the hospital softly patted his shoulders. The boy sat there all by himself for two hours already, being the only close person who went to look for Jungkook and Taejeon. "Don't say it", Lyza whispered, voice cracking. "Jungkook will make it."
Taehyung didn't reply for a while, "Just get over here, Lyz. They said Taejeon is most likely to wake up tonight and he needs someone to wake up to except for me", the boy explained. "I'm already packing my stuff", she hummed into her phone, pushing stuff into her bag to make her way to the airport as fast as she could.
One of the doctors left the room in which Jungkook was getting surgery in for the whole time since the ambulance arrived here. Taehyung put the phone away, jumping up to rush to the stressed out man who kept ruffling his hair, head hurting horribly. "Anything?", the boy asked in a small voice but the doctor only shook his head, sighing heavily when he turned to Taehyung. "We're still trying to fix the rips. The crash broke nearly all of them, one of them is pressing onto his lungs. There might be longterm medical issues he'll have to face if he wakes up."
"If?", Taehyung asked anxiously.
The man put one hand on the boy's shoulder, "The kid is probably going to wake up soon, the narcosis should fade away by now, maybe get some plushie for him and wait in his room until he's waking up, alright?"
"What about Jungkook?", Taehyung asked again, "What does if mean? When is he going to wake up?"
The doctor gulped, not sure how to tell the boy. "I'm not even sure if he'll make it through surgery, Taehyung. The car crashed right into his side of the car. The kid was lucky, we lost the driver around one hour ago and your boyfriend..", the doctor looked down, "It just doesn't look too well, okay?"
Taehyung nodded, tears coming up. "The kid is his, right?", the doctor asked slowly. Taehyung nodded, "He is."
"Do you think you'd make a good father?", the doctor asked quietly, tilting his head while he tried to comfort the crying boy with soft pats on his back. "No idea", Tae sobbed.
"You better find that out soon, you might be all the little one has left."
With that the doctor turned around and walked back into surgery, grabbing a bottle of water from a nurse that was passing by.
Taehyung turned around, feeling numb while he headed towards the room of Taejeon. The kid was put into the kid's section of the hospital which made Taehyung's insides hurt, seeing all those kids with scars, broken bones and pain in their eyes. They deserved better. And so did Jungkook.
What felt the worst was, that all of this was his fault and no one else's. If he would've treated Jungkook better that night, none of this would be happening right now. Taejeon deserved to have a father, he should grow up with Jungkook in their small but comfy apartment, hang out with Lili all the time and turn into an amazing adult with a loving father.
Not without one.
Taehyung entered the room, sitting down next to Taejeon who was laying in the bed, eyes still shut because he was still sleeping. He was connected to a machine that showed his heartbeats, he also got oxygen through a mask they put on his mouth since he wasn't able to breath on his own.
Taejeon was lucky, he really was. When the woman found him, the kid just stopped breathing. The doctors were able to bring him back on their way to the hospital, enforcing breathing through a mask. Throughout surgery it got a bit critical at first because his small heart wasn't playing along, yet he made it through. The nurse who brought him out of surgery and to his room, she called him a little fighter and Taehyung started crying when she said those words. There was nothing more true in this world than that.
Now the eleven year old laid there, asleep with no idea he wouldn't wake up seeing his father on the side of his bed. Neither would he see his mother because it would take her a day to get here, a flight from Asia to America wasn't done in two hours.
"I'm so sorry, buddy", Taehyung whispered when he sat down and grabbed the boy's hand, holding it softly. Tears were falling again, "So, so sorry. This is all my fault, I shouldn't have-, god I'm so sorry Taejeon. I swear, I promise it with all my heart, if Jungkook will make it out alive, I'll be better. I'll be so much better for him, I promise I will never-"
Taehyung didn't even notice while he was rambling how Taejeon was opening his eyes, looking at Taehyung with big doey eyes. With one hand he put the oxygen mask off because he was able to breath by himself now again. "Make it out alive?", the kid asked quietly, making Taehyung snap out of his trance.
"Oh dear", Tae blurted out, jumped up and pressed a kiss to the boy's forehead. "You're awake", he smiled while he cried and accidentally made Taejeon's shirt wet. "Where is my Dad?", Taejeon asked, pulling his hand back from Taehyung's. "Where is he ? Is he okay ?"
Taehyung couldn't even answer, he just covered his face, "I'm so sorry", he let out. "Where is my Dad", Taejeon asked again, trying to get up until he realised he couldn't feel his legs. "I can't feel my legs", he whispered, eyes filling with tears. "I want to see my Dad", he said again, "Where is my Dad", his eyes kept glancing around, panic rising up inside of him. He had no memories of what happened after the crash, everyone was blurred out so he had no idea where his father or the driver went to.
"He's still in surgery", Taehyung quickly said, "I'll get a nurse", he then said, worried over Taejeon's leg. The boy nodded, inhaling deeply to keep his focus. He couldn't cry. Taehyung was crying already, one of them had to be strong. His Dad would make it, that's for sure. They pressed a red button which made the nurse come instantly. It was a girl with short cut hair and big eyes, bangs falling above her forehead softly. "He's awake!", she cheered softly and rushed over to the kid's bed. "How are you feeling, honey?", she sat down and patted his head, brushing through his hair.
Taejeon kept quiet, he didn't know that woman. "Who is you?", he asked, ignoring the wrong grammar he was using.
"I'm a nurse here, I'll take care of you for the next few days", she explained softly and grabbed a glass of water. "You should drink something", she immediately suggested but Taejeon shook his head. "What's your name?", he asked quietly.
"My name is Jihyo, what's yours?", she questioned, tilting her head a little. "Taejeon", the boy replied. "Miss Jihyo I can't feel my legs", he then said and pushed the blanket away. The girl's eyes widened and she immediately pressed a button which would bring a doctor. "You can't feel your legs?", she asked worriedly. Taejeon nodded, "I can't move them, it's like they're not there anymore but I can see them."
Jihyo nodded slowly, looking at Taehyung worriedly, "Things like that can happen, it's typical aftermath after a traumatic experience or accidents", she explained and the boy nodded. "Just make it okay", he said, getting up as he paced up and down the room.
A doctor came rushed in, hair in a mess and huge glasses on his nose. For a second, Taehyung's heart stopped, "What are you doing here?!", he asked plainly and the man furrowed his brows just the same, "Taehyung!??!??"
"NAMJOON?!?!?"
"Hello I can't feel my legs", Taejeon rolled his eyes, "Can someone help me first?!"
Namjoon nodded, hurrying over to the kid. "Well during surgery we checked all the bones and nerves, everything seems alright. This is probably brain caused, maybe due to the burns, your legs suffered a lot from the fire. You should be able to feel them soon again", he said calmly and held his fist out, wanting to give the kid a fist as some sort of cool handshake. Taejeon only lifted his brows, "Where's my Dad?", he asked.
"Your Dad is here too?", Namjoon asked confused, he wasn't one of the doctors who were in surgery of accident victims. "He is", Taehyung said quietly. "I'll go and check in with the doctors to see how he is doing", the man hummed and then walked out of the room again.
"Great. He's a doctor and he still didn't make my legs okay", Taejeon pouted and crossed his arms. "Jihyo can we play a game?", he then asked, looking back at the girl.
"We can, later when I'm on my break", she offered softly, "But right now I have some patients to take care of", she said a little sad. "Why don't you play with your other Dad?", she asked.
"This is not my Dad", Taejeon said, voice cold as ice. "I don't know him", he gave Taehyung a bitter smile and then turned his head away. "He's the reason my Dad is not here, I want him to leave."
Jihyo gulped and nodded, "Alright, alright. I'm sorry", she said and then got up slowly, "I'll come back in an hour, okay? I'll bring food and then we can play a funny game or I'll read you something maybe?"
Taejeon shrugged, "Whatever. Just make him leave."
Taehyung got up himself and walked out with his expression turning even sadder. He ruined everything.
Jungkook's surgery was going on for ten more hours. The doctor didn't switch shifts once, insisting on finishing this one. Nurses kept walking in and out to bring him water and take breaks themselves. It wasn't an easy surgery to fix all those broken bones and bring back the boy's lungs in their old position in which they could work properly.
Taehyung tried once more to talk to Taejeon but the boy pretended to fall asleep everytime Taehyung entered the room. No chance to get through to him.
So Taehyung waited outside, drinking five cups of coffee until he felt someone throwing an arm around him. It was Namjoon who just finished his shift. "Life has funny ways of bringing people back into one place", he hummed and smiled weakly.
Taehyung shrugged, "I shouldn't be here", he only said. "I ruined Jungkook's life again, not once. No I ruined it twice. I should be in there right now, not him. Jungkook shouldn't have been in that car and neither should have Taejeon. That should be me-"
"Shut up", Namjoon interrupted him, "Shit happens, you can't make them unhappen so stop thinking like that. Taejeon already made it and so will Jungkook", Namjoon tried to say. "Everything is going to be okay in the end, and if it's not okay yet then it isn't the end, do you understand?"
"Wise much", Taehyung scoffed, crossing his arms. "He's still in surgery. He's in there for 12 hours now, Namjoon. You can't tell me things are looking good for him."
The older shook his head, "No in fact, they lost him three times already during surgery as far as one of the nurses told me. But he made it back every single time, they keep saying he has some sort of guardian angel up there", Namjoon whispered. "I bet it's his Mom", he added slowly.
And Taehyung nodded, "And his Dad. They loved him and they will forever even though they're in heaven already."
Namjoon smiled a little, "So, believe a little in faith, Kook will make it out alright."
"How comes you're in America?", Taehyung asked, looking at Namjoon for a while. "I graduated from college with the best score, so I got huge job offers, one was from Chicago. They needed a doctor for the children here, so I decided to come here. Jin got into a modeling agency here, turned out he wouldn't even had to go through college, his face got him into huge fashion shows. We adopted a kid lately, and a dog. Life's going great for us finally after all the bullying."
Taehyung smiled sadly, "Wish I could say the same."
"Maybe that's karma", Namjoon let out in a small voice. "Mabye you shouldn't have broken my glasses back then. Shit went down after you did that, remember?"
Taehyung couldn't help but chuckle a little, "I'm sorry for that, man. Glasses are hella expensive. Learnt that afterwards, I wear them too now."
"They really are", Namjoon rolled his eyes, "But it's fine. I still don't get why you two pulled all that shit on us. Outing us against our will, bullying us until the whole school despised us and turned their attention away from you. Just so you could make out in private, huh?"
"You still hate us for it, right?", Taehyung asked after looking at the older for a while. "Always did. Jin's the one who felt sorry for Jungkook and helped him. I've never been a fan of the two of you. For me you're nothing but fake without knowing who you truly are."
Taehyung gulped dryly, "Why you're talking to me then? Why you're trying to be there for me earlier? When you despise us so much?"
"Well, is there anyone else?", Namjoon questioned back slowly. Taehyung shrugged. "No, exactly. There's no one around to take care of you", Namjoon replied to himself. "Everyone needs somebody to hold onto and as far as Jihyo told me, the kid hates you, you hate yourself and your boyfriend is still in surgery. You don't have friends or anything. And until you're able to be there for yourself, I might just take that part", Namjoon hummed.
"Why?"
"I'm a doctor for kids, I saw plenty of them crying night after night, some without anyone by their sides. And for me, you're still a kid, Taehyung."
That hit the younger just in the right spot. "There's kids here without anyone by their sides?"
Namjoon nodded, "Plenty. Look at Taejeon, he'd be all alone too if you wouldn't sit outside of his room all the time and wait until he wants to talk to you."
Taehyung shrugged, "It's just that if he needs something I can get it for him. If he hates me forever, I understand. But Jungkook would never forgive me if I would not at least take care of his well-being."
"And that's the reason why I'm here", Namjoon smiled a little. "You might never cared for any of us but this kid and this one boy always meant the world to you. Makes you a good person."
"Oh I'm not", Taehyung whispered. "I'm a horrible person."
"Everyone can be horrible from time to time", the older said calmly. "Anyways, Jin is going to pick me up soon. Do you want us to get you or the kid anything? Food? Blankets?"
Taehyung shrugged, "Coffee."
Namjoon nodded, "Alright, we'll get you some."
"Thanks."
*
"Where is he??!?", Lyza cried out as soon as she came running into the hospital, seeing Taehyung sitting on the floor, legs pressed to his chest and his chin resting on it. The girl had her hair up in a messy bun, was wearing a huge hoodie and leggins, her bag and Taejeon's favorite plushie from when he was a baby in her hands. The girl looked like a mess, obviously sleep deprived after the long flight.
Taehyung looked at her for a second until he answered. Jungkook was still in surgery, after 15 hours by now. They lost him another time twenty minutes ago and were currently trying to bring him back.
Lyza stopped in front of Taehyung, kneeling down in front of the not responding boy. "Taehyung where's my kid?!", she literally yelled at him.
Taehyung pointed on a door on the other side of the floor, "I think he might be asleep", he let out weakly.
Lyza nodded, "Are you okay?", she asked quietly.
Taehyung shook his head. "No. But go, he refuses to talk to me. He needs someone", he hummed. Lyza got up, patting Tae's shoulders. "I'll be back."
With that she turned around and ran into the room of her son.
Taejeon wasn't sleeping, he was crying silently, hugging himself while doing so. When he saw his mother, his throat went dry and he cried a little harder. "Mom", he let out weakly and Lyza broke into tears as well. "Baby", she cried and sat down next to him, stroking above his cheeks with tears staining her cheeks. "God, I'm sorry it took me so long to get here-"
Taejeon shook his head, "Is Dad awake?"
Lyza gulped, "He's not", she whispered.
Taejeon turned his head away, wiping his tears away with one hand, going silent again.
"Honey, talk to me. Is there anything you need?"
"My Dad", Taejeon sobbed, lips trembling because he couldn't hold those tears back in. "I want my Dad to be here please"
"Darling", Lyza said with her voice all cracky. "I know, I know. I want him to be here too."
"No you don't", Taejeon said immediately with his voice going deep. "No one wants him here, only I really love him."
Lyza gulped, "We all care for your Dad, honey."
Taejeon chuckled bitterly, wiping his tears away again. "Sure."
"How do your legs feel? Taehyung told me on the phone you said you can't feel them?", she asked worriedly, brushing through his messy hair. Taejeon looked at her for a second, "I still can't feel them."
Lyza nodded, handing him his favorite plushie. "I'm sure you'll feel them soon. Can I get you anything? Food? Maybe sweets?"
"I don't want anything", Taejeon snapped. "I want my Dad. And most importantly I want to be alone."
"I came all the way-", his mother tried to say. "I didn't ask you to", Taejeon said, voice cracking with tears bursting out again. "I didn't ask any of you to be here and I never did ask anything from anyone I just wanted my Dad to be treated fairly and now he's not here and all of you are and this is unfair. Go."
"Please, honey, don't push me away", Lyza whispered. "I'm sorry I-"
The kid stayed stubborn, a knot building down his throat. He didn't want to be like this, not to his mother and not to Taehyung. But he couldn't help it, he was so, so incredibly angry. He didn't even know what for, he just felt anger rising up his body and drowning him in it. And he had no idea how to handle it, so he rather pushed everyone away than letting someone close.
"I want my Dad back", Taejeon whispered, biting his lips while he scrunched his face a little, trying so hard to hold his tears in and not crying like a baby. "I just want my Dad back", he repeated and then looked away.
Lyza nodded slowly, "I know, honey I know."
Taejeon didn't respond any further.
The girl got up, "I'll be outside all the time, yeah? If you need anything or if you decide that you want me around, I'm here okay. I won't leave any time soon, honey. I'll be there, right outside the door."
Taejeon nodded, "Thank you, Mum."
"Nothing to thank for", the girl let out in a small voice, heading outside with tears falling down her puffy cheeks. She walked to Taehyung and sat down next to him in silence. They didn't talk for a long time until the girl finally broke the silence. "He doesn't want to see me either."
Taehyung turned his head surprised, "He doesn't?"
Lyza shook her head, "He's so mad at everyone", she hummed. "I feel like if we can't get him Jungkook back, my kid will be so broken", she wiped her tears away, putting her head down on Taehyung's broad shoulders.
"I'll be too", Taehyung let out, wrapping one arm around her. "And on top of all that, this is my fault."
Lyza sighed wholeheartedly, "It's not. Accidents happen, Tae."
"If we wouldn't have fought, he wouldn't have got into that car."
"Then someone else would have, Tae", Lyza said quietly. "So what?", Taehyung grumbled. "So what?", Lyza repeated.
"Your kid wouldn't be in the hospital then", Taehyung snapped.
"And that's exactly why you shouldn't think like that", Lyza hummed. "Maybe not mine, but someone else's. Maybe a kid that wouldn't have came back after stopping breathing. Maybe a father who would've died in the spot. Maybe a happy family. Maybe two children. Just because it wouldn't have happened to any of us doesn't make it any better."
Taehyung shrugged, "You're such a good person", he said slowly when she looked back up and their eyes met for a while. "I try to be", Lyza sighed.
"You're good at trying then", Taehyung grumbled and she chuckled lightly. "Well, obviously."
They went silent again until she started speaking again, "What if Taejeon won't stop pushing us away? He needs to talk to someone or else he's going to push it all down and that's not healthy.."
"Don't worry, if he doesn't talk to us until the morning I'll call Lili. She is mad anyways because she got brought back home to her mother when the police came to tell us Jungkook and Taejeon had been in an accident."
"Who's Lili?", Lyza asked quietly and realised that she had no idea what was even happening in her son's life.
"His best friend", Taehyung hummed. "If he won't talk to anyone, he'll still talk to her."
Lyza nodded, facing the floor. "I surely do hope so."
"He will", Taehyung said optimistically. Right then, the door of the surgery opened and the doctors finally came outside, pulling the bed of Jungkook with them to bring him to his room. Taehyung and Lyza jumped up, running towards them immediately to see the boy.
He was sleeping peacefully, chest going up and down softly with an oxygen mask on his face. "He made it", Taehyung let out, tears coming back up again but this time because he felt so relieved.
The doctor gave the boy a tired smile, he was more than just exhausted after trying to save a life for more than 15 hours. "We lost the boy five times, he's tough for sure."
"He is", Taehyung cried out and walked along, sticking to the side of the bed. Lyza stayed behind, following a bit slower.
"When is he going to wake up?", Taehyung asked after the doctor brought the boy into his room. He turned towards Taehyung and his expression dropped all over again. "I have no idea."
"What do you mean with that?", Taehyung blurted out. "We had to put him in an artificial coma, his body couldn't make it on its own-"
"That means?!?!?!", Taehyung yelled out, voice going dry along with his whole throat, his body turning stiff.
"That means he could wake up in two hours or in two years, we don't know that."
***
i'm considering if i wanna update this a third time today