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XXXIII. Move-In Ready My Love
HEATHER
It's already been a month since Carter and I have officially started dating. It honestly doesn't feel any different than before we became an official couple. The only thing that changed was the title. You know, where we call each other our boyfriend or girlfriend when people ask. After everything that happened with Bryan, I never thought I'd be able to call myself someone's girlfriend ever again.
We act the same with one another as we did before and are still desperately in love with one another. Having fun together like we did when we were just friends never let up either. I guess that's what happens when you're friends first, even though we acted as more, with you know the kissing and sleeping together aspect of it all. Either way, I'm the happiest I've ever been in my whole life. Carter does that for me, every single day.
"You know, you should just move in with me already," Carter grins down at me as we lay curled up on the couch watching a rom-com about a pair of friends who are sleeping together with no commitment. Convenient isn't it? I laughed hysterically when Carter put it on.
I can't stop myself from laughing hysterically now at his sudden outburst while we are in the middle of the scene of Ashton Kutcher and Natalie Portman doing some insane sexual position off the back of the couch. Hmm, I wonder if Carter and I should try that out?
Carter chuckles at my reaction while squeezing my sides, making me laugh even more. I nearly roll off the couch as he grabs a hold of me and pulls me back into him, spooning me from behind.
The last couple days on his time off, Carter has been asking me to move in with him. I won't give him a legit answer because I'm worried we are moving too fast. Bryan and I didn't move in together until after two years of being together.
You need to stop comparing your relationship with Carter to your past relationships, especially Bryan. Dr. Gabriel's words echo in my mind, reminding me that the relationship I have with Carter, is nothing like the one I had with Bryan. Bryan could only dream of being half the man Carter is.
"I don't know why you want me to live with you so badly anyways. It's not going to be any different than it is now," I suggest as I roll over to face him and rest my chin on his chest, looking up into his green eyes.
"True, but at least if we're living together you'll be here when I leave and still here when I come back. None of this back and forth stuff we've been doing. Plus you have to admit the two weeks I was off work were like we were living together since you never left," he reminds me and gently runs his fingers through my hair.
I cut my eyes at him because I know he's right. Will I admit it? Nope!
"Okay so if I move in, how long would you last before you're kicking me out because you've had enough of me?" I scoff as I climb off of him and sit up on the couch.
Carter sits up next to me, laying his arm across the back of the couch behind me and I can feel him looking at me intently. He finally reaches up and grabs my face with his hand, making me look at him.
"Heather Nichole, I would never kick you out. Your ass is too sweet to kick out. I'd just make you go somewhere else when my new girlfriend comes over," he teases me and I hit him in the face with one of the throw pillows.
"You're an asshole Carter Lee. What makes you think I'd let you have any of my sweet ass?" I grin suggestively at him, knowing where my question is about to lead to.
"Well, since you let me claim it with my shaft multiple times last week," he growls sensually as he lifts me up onto his lap, squeezing my nearly bare ass with his hands since I'm only dressed in my panties and one of his Clinton Hills Fire Department t-shirts.
"That was fun wasn't it?" I purr while biting my bottom lip, thinking about what we did that day. I'd never experimented sexually with anyone beyond basic vanilla and a bit of hair pulling every now and then before Carter. But since him, I feel so comfortable with myself and my sexuality that I'm excited to try anything and everything with him.
I play with the short black locks at the nape of his neck as I lean down to press my lips to his. He squeezes my ass more, gripping both cheeks with his hand and giving them a firm smack before tucking his fingers under the material of my panties. I begin to grind my hips on top of him as I glide my fingertips over every inch of his tattooed skin, tracing the roses on his left bicep.
Before I know it, we are both stripped down to nothing and making love on the sofa until we can barely breathe. The sex is always so intense with us and I absolutely love every second of it. I'm positive that there is no other man on this planet that can give me multiple orgasms within fifteen minutes. For us, that's a quickie at best.
As he curls up behind me, he wraps his arms around my waist as he begins to slowly kisses up my neck. When he gets to my ear, he softly pulls at the lobe, giving it a teasing pull. He softly thrust up against me, rubbing his shaft against my ass before moving his mouth to my temple and giving it a loving kiss.
"I love you Heather, now move in with me already woman," he pleads and I immediately shake my head, hiding my smile from him. He groans loudly before sitting up and smacking my ass as moves from the couch. When he heads for the shower to get ready for his next shift, I smile more at his frustration before making my way to follow him. Shower sex before work sounds amazing right now.
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The next day I'm at the clinic getting my wrist checked out so I can finally get this damn splint off. Everything has healed fine and I don't waste a second when I throw the damn thing in my bag, never planning on wearing one again for as long as I live. When I'm in the lobby of the clinic, signing the paperwork and talking with the girls behind the desk, I hear a familiar voice that makes me turn my head. I glance up to see Bryan's girlfriend walking down the hall from the waiting room. She's following the medical assistant towards the scales and I overhear the assistant ask how far along she is, making my heart stop. That's when I notice her very large pregnant belly. She's pregnant? Seems to be pretty far along as well. Holy hell! I begin to wonder if it's Bryan's baby she's pregnant with.
I think back to the last time I saw her and I don't remember her showing then. Neither Bryan or her mentioned her pregnancy towards me and I'd think they'd throw that in my face the first chance they got. Since my infertility diagnoses, they never had a problem of rubbing that in my face, making me feel like less of a woman.
"I'm nearly six months now and we are having a boy. I just wish his father could be here to experience this but he got into trouble because of his ex," she pouts and I don't feel sorry for her one bit. Bryan deserved the time he got for the stunt him and his psycho cousin pulled.
Wait, six months! He broke up with me a little over four months ago. Since it's his, that means he got her pregnant while we were still together. He cheated on me? That unfaithful asshole!
I feel a surge of raw emotions flow through me and it gets worse as I look back up at her just as she rubs her hand over her swollen belly. I feel the tears form and threatened to fall down my cheeks.
"Heather honey are you okay?" Melissa, one of the receptionist asks me with concern.
"Yeah I'm fine," I mutter and quickly wipe the tears from my face.
As I walk out to replacement car, I get the sensation that I can't breathe. When I get into the driver seat, I know I'm having an anxiety attack as I clutch at my aching chest. I haven't had an attack this bad in a while, not since I started going to therapy every week. I go through in my mind what Dr. Gabriel taught me if one should arise.
I take in slow deep breaths and recite the mantra's she suggested to use that's helped me through one any time I felt overwhelmed with emotions just like now.
I am worthy.
I am love.
I am selfless.
I am hope.
I am compassion.
And this too shall pass.
I repeat it slowly over and over again until I feel the anxiety dissipate. I concentrate on my breathing while reciting it until I don't feel like I'm being choked by an invisible force anymore. When my breathing returns to normal all on its own, I open my eyes feeling at peace.
It worked.
When I told Carter about the technique Dr. Gabriel suggested, he thought it was great that I found something to help me while I'm experiencing an attack. Being the supportive boyfriend that he is and all. Then of course, Carter being Carter, he started suggesting I'd start doing yoga in front of him so he could check my ass out in a pair of leggings.
I laugh to myself as I think of him and his humorous personality. I love that I've found someone that shares that with me, there's never a dull moment. But even though he's what you'd consider a class clown, he also knows what to say or do when it comes time to be serious. He's perfect in every sense, my true soul mate.
As I drive towards home, I decide to stop by Bex's to spend some time with her. Since Carter's accident, I've been over there most the time and rarely am ever home to see the family. Plus I haven't seen her much since she's officially a teacher now and has been kept busy getting everything ready for when school starts back up in a couple weeks. I can only imagine how it is for my brother with her being so busy. Considering he's whipped as all hell and joined to her hip 99% of the time, I bet he's struggling right now.
Thankfully Bex is home and as soon as I walk in to the house, I'm greeted by little Sarah. She immediately jumps up into my arms and kisses my cheek. It melts my heart and I start thinking about the doctors office, seeing Bryan's pregnant girlfriend. My eyes start to water and I quickly look away so she doesn't notice. Sarah is far too young to understand why auntie is upset right now.
I walk into the kitchen where Bex is sitting at the island, looking through next years curriculum for her class. I take a moment to feel proud of my best friend and sister. She's worked her ass off to get where she's at now. Between finishing school and going through working at the school for a year to get her accredited hours, all while raising a family and newborn. Rebekah Daniels is one hell of a woman. In the middle of my thoughts, she glances up and when she sees me standing here with Sarah in my arms, she giving me one of her signature smiles filled with warmth that is sure to brighten any room.
"Hey sis, what are you doing here?" she grins while taking her reading glasses off, putting them on top of her paperwork.
"Just wanted to come by and visit with you. It's been a while," I smile and sit Sarah down. She runs off towards the living room where J.D is sitting with his best friend, Alex Cambridge.
They've been friends since Kindergarten, just like Bex and me. But in all honesty, they remind me more of my brother and his late best friend, Ford Taylor. They too were an unstoppable duo that had been thick as thieves since preschool. Both boys smile down at Sarah, letting her sit inbetween them as JD turns the channel to Doc McStuffins, allowing Sarah to watch her show.
"Well yeah it's been a while sweetie. That's what happens when you get a boyfriend and are over at his place all the time. You might as well move in with him already," she grins knowingly at me.
"Did Carter say something to you or Nate?" I ask suspiciously and by the look on her face, I know he did. I roll my eyes and laugh. Of course Carter would stoop as low to involve my brother and best friend.
"Don't be mad at him Hev. Carter is absolutely crazy about you and wants to move forward in your relationship," she explains with a warm smile. I know that, I just don't know if it's the best decision right now.
"I know. But I don't want to move too fast Bex. Look how long it took my relationship with Bryan to get where it was at before it broke off," I sit down on the stool next to her.
"Well sweetie, you should've thought of that before you started sleeping with him before you even said I love you and became an official couple. Plus you can't compare that relationship with this one either. Carter is completely different and it's not really fair to either one of you to keep comparing the two," she frowns at me. God I know she's right, but that is something I'm working on. I'm a work in progress people.
"Remember Hev, it was you always taking the initiative with Bryan throughout your relationship. This time, with Carter, he's doing it all. Carter has never been crazy in love with someone before. You're his first love and he's been trying so hard to prove his commitment to you," she smiles, gently rubbing my arm reassuringly.
"That's what I'm scared of Bex. I'm his first, so he's going to go overboard because it's new and exciting. But what happens once the new wears off?" I pout, drawing circles on the counter with my finger.
"Oh sweetie, with true love, it never wears off. Yes there's times your brother drives me crazy and visa versa, but we'd never leave one another. We'd rather deal with each other's craziness at times than be apart. And that's how it is with you two, you can't deny it. Carter Allen loves you Hev, and he wouldn't get sick of you and leave," she giggles as she tucks my hair behind my ear. I really hope she's right because God knows how crazy I am about him.
"I suppose you're right," I sigh, smiling at her before pulling her in for a warm hug. Maybe one day I'll say yes about moving in with Carter, but until then, I'm going to make Carter continue to work for it. If he truly loves me, he'll stick around no matter what.
God, please don't let my words bite me in the ass. Please let him stick by my side forever, no matter how difficult I may be from here on out.