Originally posted on FanFiction.net, Link in bio. This will be an episode behind, so if you want to read ahead, (cause humans are impatient beings), check me out on the other site!
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Mystic Radio ep. 10: Jealousy is a disease
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MC POV
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"Bye MC!"
"Bye Jaehee." I say as I watch her head out to go meet Zen.
They've become really close recently, this having been the fourth time this week. First it was just work outs, but now he's taking her to watch him rehearse. Next Sunday, they're planning on catching a movie I think...
'It's only as friends.' Jaehee would say, Zen following with 'Yeah, It's just a friendship between me and a fan that I met through RFA.'. Despite their protests, I still feel jealous. Jealous that time Jaehee and I would spend home together is now spent with Zen. Jealous that Zen is actually in the running all because of genitalia. But more than anything, I'm ashamed of feeling this way.
Why do I feel like this? Jaehee is her own person and can go out with Zen if she wants. She can date whatever guy she likes. And I can't do anything about it, so why do I feel like I'm being torn apart?
I chuckle to myself, thinking back a few months ago, when we first moved in together. How I kept thinking it would be okay, and I could handle watching Jaehee with someone else.
Boy was I wrong.
I should move on. For the sake of both of us.
Jaehee said she'd be out for a while, and I don't want to stay here alone right now. I shoot off a quick text and soon enough the doorbell chimes.
"Hey Seven." I say as I open the door with a grin.
"Howdy MC.". I quirk an eyebrow up making him smirk. "Stay in or head out? I brought one of my babies today if you wanted to go for a drive." he states, proudly beaming about his sports car. "I might even let you drive if you want...".
I lean against the door frame, crossing my arms. "You were so worried you brought your 'child' out?" I ask. Seven rarely lets people go around in the car for the heck of it, much less actually let them drive. "Getting out of the house sounds nice, but I'll let you drive.". Seven lets out a breath of relief.
Last time I drove one, he was so nervous his knuckles turned white from gripping the seat belt. I still remember him shrieking at me to slow down when I was already below the speed limit. When he drives, however, it's a different story. He knows exactly how much he can get away with and does it. At least it makes driving with him more fun though, and I could use a distraction right now.
I go grab my bag and lock up the door before getting in the car, Seven following suit.
"Where to?" he asks as he revs the engine, making it satisfyingly purr.
"Surprise me." I say.
"As you please, M'lady." he says, with horrible British accent that makes me laugh, before heading down the road.
We head out of town and I get more and more confused as the passing buildings soon become trees. The road begins to start winding and the trees get thicker as the sky starts turning light pink in the evening sun. Eventually, he pulls in to a gravel parking lot, at the bottom of a hill, in the middle of nowhere.
He turns towards me, "We're here! With all the lack of people, it's hard to believe this place is only like twenty minutes away huh?".
I look out the window and he's right. As far as I can tell, it's like we went off the country. I didn't even know a place like this was so close by. "You brought me here to kill me didn't you." I joke.
"Oh darn, you figured it out. Guess I'll have to try again another day." he teases. "But come on, we aren't just going to stop here. I hope you're up for a walk!".
We get out and I notice a small dirt path leading up the hill. "We're going up the hill?" I ask.
"Yep! It's not that bad.".
We trudge up the path to a mostly flat part of the hill, met by a lone cement bench under a tree at the end. To my surprise, the path doesn't go all the way up but instead it only took us a little more than halfway. I can see the edge of town and further in the city as the sun starts to droop down.
"It's beautiful here." I say as Seven takes a seat on the bench. "How did you find it?".
"I had a lot on my mind one day and was driving aimlessly, just trying to clear my head. I saw the gravel patch on the side of the road and pulled in out of curiosity and found the path.". He leans back on his arms, as much as he can without falling off the bench, peaceful gazing at the city. "I don't know why it's here or who put this bench here, but this became one of my favorite spots in the city. I come here to think or just get away once in a while.".
I take a seat next to him, a little surprised at his answer. "That was... Actually really nice, Seven. I was expecting some cheesy joke." I laugh. "It's really nice up here though. Thank you for showing it to me.".
"No problem. I figured with the Jaehee thing, you could use a nice place to think or maybe even just relax." he says all while keeping his gaze fixed on the sunset.
"Is it that obvious?" I ask, already knowing the answer. "How do I get over her?" I ask resignedly.
He shifts his jaw, considering my question. "I'm not entirely sure." he says admittedly. Turning to face me, "But I hope you figure it out. My guess would be to try and give yourself time away from Jaehee. It kind of sucks though, I was rooting for you guys.". He then turns his attention back over the ridge.
Seven is right about one thing. I can't move on if I keep bringing her with me. I want to move on, but part of me doesn't want to accept the idea that I should.
"Yeah." I mumble, still deep in thought.
This is how it should be, right? I should just accept it and get over her. But I don't want to yet. I want to hold on even just a while longer. Just... Just a little longer, till these feelings start to fade naturally. But what if... No. I just need time.
Easing back into reality, I turn to Seven again, asking "Since when are you so serious.".
"Excuse you!", he exclaims, "I can be serious and supportive when I need to!". He bumps my shoulder with his. "I'm not a happy joke machine okay? I wish I was though. Robots are great!".
I snort at his remark. "Yeah.". My thoughts inadvertently drift back to Jaehee. "Do you think, um, I've ever had a chance? That maybe even in the slightest?".
"Yeah. Yeah, I do. But maybe for once, I'm actually wrong. And if that's the case, I don't want to see you all sad and heartbroken just cause I prodded you on.". I can hear the confusion in his voice. The uncertainty of what to say or what to do. "I really don't know." he finishes.
"I think.. I just need to think it over. Just give me some time alright?" I ask. "I want to date Jaehee, but I wont wait for her anymore. If someone asks me out, I'll take the opportunity.". I sweep my hair behind my ear, "Just... Don't push it either way anymore please.".
"...Alright. And okay, that makes sense.". We stare in silence at the now disappearing sun for a little while longer. "We should get you home." he says.
"Just a little longer.".
"Okay.".
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Jaehee POV
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"Bravo!" I cheer as Zen finishes the last scene of rehearsal, gaining some side glances from the other cast members.
Zen smiles at me before telling the director something, the two of them talking animatedly with their hands. The director comes to a conclusion and gives a nod to Zen before going off to talk to the rest of the cast.
Zen comes trotting up to me, an excited look on his face. "The director said they could really see the improvement in my acting. Thanks for going over lines with me the other day.".
"No problem! Thank you for letting me come watch you practice.".
"Well, you're like my favorite fan.". Putting his hand on my shoulder, he looks me in the eyes saying "But more so, you're a good friend.". This takes me by surprise and before I can reply he starts strutting towards the exit, arms outstretched as if preparing to hug someone. "Time for dinner! I'm starving.".
"It's a bit late for that isn't it?" I ask.
"Well, rehearsal ran later than usual. But that doesn't change the fact I'm hungry." he answers.
I crack a grin as he lets out a whoop once we get outside.
"Let's try the diner the just opened up." he suggests. "It's only a few blocks, and I want a burger.".
"But-".
"It isn't the healthiest, I know. But once wont hurt.".
"Alright. When you come crawling to me, saying I shouldn't have let you eat a burger, I'm just going to laugh at you." I state.
With a warm chuckle, "That's fair.".
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After ordering our meals, I think to myself 'I wonder if MC would like to come here sometime?'. The simple innocent idea spiraling, and I soon become lost in my own head, inadvertently staring at the wall.
"Jaehee, is something on your mind?" Zen asks.
His question snaps my brain back into focus. "Um. Well...", I begin, seemingly unable to find the right words. "Is it weird to think about someone a lot? Just, out of nowhere?".
"No. I know there's someone that's almost constantly on my mind, but my reason is probably different than yours." he says sheepishly.
"Or, well, what if they are a close friend?" I ask. "How did you know the difference between liking, um, that girl as a friend and romantically?".
"Why do you- oh..! I see." He gives a smile, "Well I guess when you start thinking about them a lot. Or how you love the little things like the way they laugh, or the warm hugs they give you. It's when you start wanting to be with someone and miss them when you're away. They start sneaking into your thoughts and being with them is the happiest thing youve ever experienced.". He rests his chin on his hand, "It's nice of you to make sure my feelings for MC were legitimate. You're pretty close to her aren't you?".
"Uh.. Yeah. Yeah I am." I say distractedly.
He says, "I can't believe, I, an actor, couldn't even hide my feelings. I hope I wasn't too obvious.", and though I hear his words, they don't register.
'I do think about MC, but its because I'm close to her so I get reminded of her a lot. Of course I like her laugh and her warm hugs, but her laugh is just a nice one, and she hugs everyone. I enjoy her company so of course I want to spend a lot of time with her, and these past few months have been amazing, but that's just because I own my dream business. MC made that happen, so being with her is amazing because we get to work together in our own little shop.'.
I reason with all of his points and disregard all of them. What was I even thinking? She's a close friend and there is a logical explanation for all of those points. Zen obviously doesn't know what it's like to be in a close relationship with someone, so his points are invalid. Yeah.
Why does it feel like I'm lying, even if I'm not talking to anyone?
"So do you like anyone? Do those things apply to you too?" he asks, grabbing my attention back.
"Well yeah-"
"OooOoO!"
"But she's just a friend." I finish.
"She?". He thinks hard, eyes narrowing in thought, and then he perks up as if he's figured something out. "I guess friendships between women are closer than with guys.".
"Yeah." I add, unconvinced to myself.
We get back to the shop and say our goodbyes. I go upstairs and see Luciel and MC watching an animated movie.
Instead of my usual 'Hey Jaehee!', MC simply says "Oh, you're back. Hi.".
"Hello MC. Luciel, what are you doing here?" I ask.
He turns in his seat to face me, "MC was bored so I came to her rescue! Also, I wanted to know if we could hold a meeting here.".
"I told you it was fine." MC says.
"Well I wanted to check with Jaehee too.". I go and sit down in the armchair.
"Meeting for what?" I ask.
Luciel pauses the movie gaining a 'hey!' from MC. "A meeting for the RFA." he elaborates. "V has been missing for a while now, and we should take over until he comes back. That way we can get everyone on the same page. Plus now that we have MC here," he nudges her with his elbow, "we can start planning parties more often! I mean last time, MC had just a little over two weeks and we still had a great turn out!".
"That's true. Alright, that's fine under one condition." I look him dead in the eye, giving him a glare that says 'I have a black belt in Judo and I will use it.'. I say with as a serious a tone I can muster, "Do. Not. Bring. Alcohol. I'm not doing that again.".
He holds up his hands in defense and scoots away from me a little. "Yes ma'am.". I hear him loudly whisper to MC, "She's really scary sometimes.", which makes me a little prouder than it should.
MC starts the movie again. "So, what are you guys watching?" I ask.
"The Boku No My Hero Academia Two hero's movie!" Luciel proudly exclaims. He then turns to MC, flexing his muscles. "POWERRR~!" He yells.
MC chuckles before joining him, striking a power pose. "Plus Ultra~!" she cheers.
I let out a chuckle and playfully roll my eyes at the two. "You guys are such dorks." I say teasingly.
"Ya'know," Luciel starts, "Dork is something people will usually say when they find the other person attractive.". A cocky grin on his face as if he just won a bet.
He starts cackling as MC rubs her temple with her left hand before grabbing a nearby throw pillow and whacking Luciel with it, her face lightly red with anger. There must be an inside joke I'm not getting.
"Shut up you dumb tomato." she says, hitting him once again before placing the pillow behind her back.
I wonder if Luciel likes MC too... Why do all the idiots get attracted to her? But maybe this way, Zen will try his best. She deserves it. I accidentally slip out a half sentence, saying "Looks like there's competition.".
I meant for Zen, but Luciels grin gets wider than ever, and MC's eyes widen as her face turns redder.
Luciel jumps up to his feet, "The ship shall sail, lads!" he says, arm hoisted as if holding a sword.
My entire body heats up in embarrassment, "T-Thats not what I meant...".
"Too late!" he says.
MC grabs his arm and yanks him back down onto the couch. Keeping her eyes to the floor, she quietly says "Let's just finish the movie.".
Luciel, seeming like he crossed some line that I'm unaware of "I'm sorry MC. I just got excited.". She releases her grip on him and he rolls his shoulders. "Let's watch that movie! Too bad there isn't much Kachako* material in this.".
"Excuse you! Izuocha is unsinkable! Why do people have to go off cannon?!" she exclaimed in a frustrated tone. "If any two characters are ever in the same breathing space together, they get shipped!".
"Well if they're breathing the same air, they're pretty close aren't they?" he says with a wink.
MC shakes her head, "Why are you like this. That's now that I meant.".
They continue their debate, but half of it flies over my head. One thing I know for sure is MC is an absolute, total, dork. I can't help but smile as I watch the two, but then a thought creeps into my head, and for some reason I find it a bit unpleasant.
"You guys could be a couple at this point." I point out.
MC drops the pillow she was about to hit Luciel with, and quickly scoots as far from him as possible saying "Ew! He's just a good friend. It's more like he's my brother.".
"Ouch. For the record, I would be the best brother ever!" Luciel retorts.
'Oh so they don't like each other. That's relieving, but that just takes one person off the list. There's still Zen and-... Why am I thinking about this?'
Maybe I'm just tired. It's been a long day. "I'll leave you guys to watch your movie. Have fun." I say, getting up.
MC turns to me, "You're going now?" a bit of disappointment in her voice.
"Um. Yeah it's late." I state as factually as possible. When she looks at me like that, it's like puppy eyes and it makes me want to stay. "Goodnight." I say as I quickly head to my room.
"Wait!" MC says, stopping me halfway. She gives me a warm gentle smile and says "Goodnight, Jaehee. Sleep well.", before turning back to the movie.
I go into my room and shut the door behind me, and take a seat on my bed. There is this feeling again. My heart is racing and my whole body is warm, most notably my face. The feeling fades after some time, but it doesn't make the whole ordeal any less confusing.
'Maybe I... I don't know... These stupid Fluttering Feelings* are messing with my head. The last time I distinctly remember feeling like this was-.' I stop my brain right there. That isn't it, that's impossible. Absolutely... Impossible..?
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Chapter 10. End
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*If you guys are interested in some Kachako material, I do have a fic that you could read. Maybe. Like if you want to that would be totally fine (shameless plug).
*Fluttering Feelings is an amazing Webcomic! If you like lesbian relationships, you should give it a try!
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The spaceship's sensors have caught the RFA members meaningless thoughts...
Jaehee: "I wonder if Zen will make a move soon.".
MC: "Should I just tell her? No... That would be a disaster.".
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Thank you for reading this chapter of Mystic Radio! If you liked it, make sure to leave a like and subscribe so you know when the next update is! Now, go enjoy some Honey Buddha chips, and I'll see you next chapter! ~Des