𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐘'𝐒 𝐌𝐎𝐓𝐄𝐋
𝐁𝐑𝐎𝐗𝐓𝐎𝐍, 𝐎𝐊𝐋𝐀𝐇𝐎𝐌𝐀
ELEANOR
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The thing about life is that one day you'll be dead.
No matter how old or tough you are, it was bound to happen. Death was an omnipresence. It was an inevitability that no soul could evade. Never mind the care or have love to spare, you can't escape the clutches of death. Yet, Tony Stark was the living rendition of the phrase's reverse. He had tricked oblivion and it hadn't gone unnoticed. He had gone to the cusp of a departing void and returned.
He had successfully proved that immortality was attainable in individuals. Nevertheless, I could see the consequences come into play. The moment Tony had woken up from his death sleep, it had rolled off him like a foul odour.
The sheer panic that could influence a person was astounding. I knew Tony's panic, before this incident, was based on a conception he had created relating his misused wisdom. The situation back when a god had bred chaos over New York was his first evasion of death. This time was no different. Yet, similar. This was a secondary constituent that was coming to play every time a situation triggered his subconscious. And I ought to find out what it was.
In terms of medication, he was prescribed with copious amounts of rest to recuperate and arrange his newly imparted memory. By the end of the second day, he was warming up to conventional conversations and his thinking time reducing to null. Less of a machine and more human.
Tony's assets had returned to him, HAMMER supplanting gone void. Staff and aides-de-camp had started to pour back in, Stark International powering back to its usual vocation. All who had jumped ship had come back home, markets and business bustling once again. Pepper Potts face was splashed on the headlines, not a single paper failing to invoke Tony Stark's name in the superseding. With all the recovery, Osborn was revoked of his position as HAMMER corporation's chief and adjourned until further notice. All his assets had been liquidated, the funds relinquished to a welfare organization handled by Stark Industries.
I had finally gathered the courage to break the news to my mother about my surprise pregnancy. Having her wish granted, Madeline Preece was over the moon about being a grandmother. She had ordered me to come back home at once so she could see for herself and claimed to have booked the old chapel in town for the child's christening. I had ended the call asap.
Between the good news, Steve had returned the shield to its rightful owner. Sam Wilson was ecstatic to see that it was still in one piece, demanding a refund if he caught a scratch on it. Steve had followed the soldier out, a situation in Washington had come to his attention. The god of thunder had taken his leave the same week as well, bidding his fellow associates adieu and returning to his rebuilding realm. His second well-wishes were fairly normal, promising a more festive return as soon as the baby was born. I took his word for it.
On that note, Tony and I weren't on speaking terms for some odd reason. I didn't ask either, providing him with the space he needed for recuperation. He had been through enough hassle and I respected that. That didn't stop me from checking in on him when he was asleep or thinking about permanent term. A break.
Coming back from the dead had its weights. Undoubtedly, if the baby was not in the way I would've gone for the kill, striking my point across. But with the family card entering the ring, I had never felt more vulnerable in front of him.
What was my role in his life? A girl he knocked up while entangled into the mess of situation over the past few weeks. I was confused, scared and lost, all the same time. As soon as the baby was out, I was horrid to think about this, but I was no longer needed. Not that we had made our relationship serious. Marriage would always be light-years away with our stances.
'Look at that,' Tony said, interrupting my reverie. 'You got fat.'
My heart skipped a beat when I swerved to him, with wide eyes. Frowning, I turned sideways to gauge the bump and bunching up the shirt up to my ribs. I scrutinized myself in a floor-length mirror, trying to locate what he was seeing. A tiny bulge had sprouted under my navel. Aw, the little blip wasn't too little anymore.
'I think I did.'
'I think the notion of kidding escaped you,' he murmured, making his way to me.
He was lucky he hadn't broken a leg and his healing process was faster than usual. The shattered bones near his ribs were still mending, the black-and-blue bruises still adorning his face like war scars. His hand was supported by a cast and a sling, which he still rolled around as if nothing happened.
'Here,' he used his healthy hand to shift my shoulder into position. I was now perfectly angled to the side, the bump more prominent than ever. 'See, that's all flab.'
'That's the baby,' I glared playfully for the nth time. 'Not me.'
'The baby,' he echoed. 'Why is she the baby? It's our baby. Ours.'
'Our baby,' I corrected, indifferently. 'All the same.'
'No. No, it's not. Hey, look at me,' he beckoned under his breath, looking at me through the reflection in the mirror. I met his gaze, trying to be as blank as possible wrenching my waist from his grasp.
'You don't see it, do you?'
'See what?'
'How much this means to me,' he muttered, his eyes brimming with seriousness.
'I was,' I breathed out. 'I was thinking of something else.'
'Uh-huh.'
'I was thinking of going back to my place,' I let out a small sigh. 'Staying there until the baby—'
'What the hell are you on about?'
'I know how you feel about marriage, Tony,' I whispered. 'It's not on your agenda right now. And I—I want to have this baby while in a proper position to support her.'
'So,' he swallowed, 'what you're gonna leave me? Leave me and raise this—our kid alone because I'm not a contender regarding pledges?'
'I don't want to,' I shook my head. 'But, that's what you want.'
'How the fuck do you know what I want, Elle?'
'Because you've got priorities, Tony! You don't need to bring a child into whatever is on your plate that involves rescues and tying a suit of armour around the whole bloody world. You need to concentrate on you and—'
'I'm sorry,' he scoffed, 'do you know how selfish you are making me sound?'
'It's not selfish if it is facts.'
'No, Elle,' he said, his voice disbelieving. 'It's how you see me. You see me as a sacrificial, futurist stickler who could never achieve stability.'
'Yes,' I blew out, 'all right, yes! I do not know if you can handle this. I don't want you to spontaneously combust between post-marital responsibilities and saving the world every other day.'
He scoffed. 'Post-marital... c'mon.'
'She's a child, Tony. Our real child. Not one of your machines or companies. You can't just fix it if something goes wrong. Humans don't work that way. Do you understand where I'm going with this?'
Silence. Morbid, frightening silence. I couldn't bear to continue when his eyes gave nothing away. My truth was already said, now it was his turn to speak his. I was scared, frightened for the baby and me.
'This baby, you, starting a family—' he swallowed roughly, 'it was delayed gratification, honey. Always working forward, improving, give-and-take. I guessed it would be enough, you know, living life on the fast lane.'
'Tony,' I started, shaking my head.
'Shut up for a second.'
I tried to smile, failing to do so.
'Now that I got everything I didn't need, I've never had it so good. God, am I so game to begin this with you. Doesn't matter what hell I raised earlier. What matters is what comes next. My next is you. You and whatever you have to offer.'
His breaths were in my ear, a confession I wasn't prepared for. A heady grin started to creep onto the very lips I thought would never smile that night. He was such a specialist on keeping me in my right mind I swore that my heart would simply stop if he left me to be.
'I know what you're thinking,' he shuffled in front of the mirror and looked me in the eye, 'I can get preoccupied. I can be rude, a bit patronising and too careless. Lax about everything. But I am going to try.'
'Prenatal constraints, ostentatious midnight cravings and all the cheesiness on this cheesecake - you got it,' his hands went to my shoulders. 'Wanna get hitched? Done. We'll grab Rhodey to walk you down the aisle, fly to Vegas, get you a pretty rock on that hand and kiss at the altar. Want a smaller home? We'll sell this one and rent. Get a house with a creaky porch, a tiny backyard and no more workshops. Somewhere Margo doesn't have to feel stranded and I can focus on us - '
I tried to whisper, my throat hoarse from emotion. 'It doesn't—'
'Of course, it matters! It matters big-time, Elle. I don't want you to...' he shut his eyes in desperation, palming them. He was running out words and breath, something I had never seen Tony Stark experience.
'I just want you to feel safe with me. I know I've done horseshit regarding that until now.'
'Hey,' I clasped his chin, jerking up his hanging head. His eyes carried hordes of guilt I wanted to slap out. He was not the one to be feeling guilty when he knows damn well that it was the responsibility that caused this myriad of drama.
'Have I ever mentioned I love you?'
He half-laughed as if he has predicted this. 'No. Uh, uh. Not this move.'
I pushed the hair out of his face, working off a grin. 'You know what? I do. Always will. You could lose it all in a day but it wouldn't bother me a tad. That is what I signed up for, correct? All and nothing.'
'Yeah.'
'Good.'
'Point is?'
'Mhmm,' I nodded, continuing to comb my fingers into his hair. He grinned the same way he did every time I executed this motion. 'So, you can screw up as much as you want. You could do fuck-all, Tony, and it wouldn't change how I feel about what's to come.'
'Stay,' he said, his voice ending in a plea and overlooking my strong-willed stance. 'Stay with me.'
'You sound dour.'
'I just died, woman. Cut me some slack.'
I laughed. 'I get the left side of the bed, then.'
Tony nodded hesitantly, his lips rolling into his teeth. I lobbed my arms around his neck, pulling him in for an embrace I wanted to last forever. His lips pressed into my hair, delivering a kiss and nose tickling my ear. He was warm and present, it was the best thing in the world. I didn't want it to end.
'I'm not riding that damn helicopter,' he murmured with a twinge of distaste. 'So I was—'
'Race you back home?' My eyes lit up with the promise of challenge. 'The winner gets the glory.'
'Put on your loser thong, Preece, because I'm about to take you to down.'
I grinned largely. 'You're in for it, Stark.'
So, I had decided something different after that.
The thing about life was that one day you'll be living.
Living this perpetual wheel of remembering and misremembering. We could be shaken, weakened, willing to curl up into a ball and cry. Somedays, we could channel the animal in us and choose to roar. Yet, we would proud of who we were. We would still be the same people, living to enjoy and to create a difference. I took into the record what Tony said. We die heroes. Tony Stark had evaded the concept and even after death, re-emerged more than a hero. That was the beauty of it.
So what was a little death, when we had the life that whole planets in our abrupt universe couldn't contain?
∞
[ and there you have it, folks. the last chapter. still, have the epilogue left - what are you looking forward to? tbh, I'm so fucking emotional rn because I'm going to say goodbye to one of my fave couples for a while :'( ]
edited!