I pulled down the Holt's driveway at seven 'o' clock on the dot. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a teensy bit nervous about how things were going to go when Clay and I were alone. Brant made me promise that if I felt too uncomfortable that I would just get into my truck and leave. He told me that he would explain to Clay why I left if it came to that. Hopefully it wouldn't and things would be completely normal.
Things felt okay when I got out of the truck and neared the house. I heard some faint laughter from inside that made me feel even better about today. When I knocked on the door, I was knocked off guard when Jives was the one to open it. He seemed just as startled to see me as I was him.
"What the hell did Brant do?!" he immediately assumed.
Clay decided to walk in and investigate who was here. That would've been completely fine if he wasn't shirtless and in his boxer briefs for crying out loud. "Shit! Charlie!" he hissed, covering his exposed pecs. "What are you doing here?!"
I covered my eyes, shielding my vision from the scene before me. Jives willingly guided me into the house to get me out of the cold. "You didn't tell me what time we were going to start working with the horses, so I came over the second I could," I explained to Clay.
"You should've called!" he shouted, sounding distressed. "I wasn't expecting you until noon!"
"I'm sorry..."
"Just please wait for me in the kitchen with everyone, I'll be down in a second!" he interrupted before I could even begin to process an apology.
I sealed my mouth closed and kept it that way until Jives pushed me into the kitchen and amongst three cute faces I didn't mind seeing when I dropped my hand from my eyes. "Hey, beautiful," I greeted Avery. She blushed and waved me off. "Howdy, handsome," I said to Jax. He chuckled and held up a spare plate of breakfast I didn't mind digging into. I passed an antsy Heather sitting at the table with half eaten breakfast foods on her plate. She smiled up at me when I kissed her forehead good morning. I took notice that she was still wearing that ring Clay gave her. There was no doubt in my mind that this little princess had talked her father into bringing her over here this morning.
"Hey there, little princess." She welcomed me with a quiet hello and continued to pick at her food uninterested. There wasn't much on her plate, I knew she could finish it if she tried, but she wasn't enthused enough about it to try. "I bet if you finish the rest of your strawberry pancake and that piece of sausage, Clay will give you a big hug and kiss. That was all that needed to be said to motivate her into finishing all of her food and even take a couple of nibbles off of my plate.
"How did you do that?" Jives asked when he noticed her eating. "I try to get her to eat, but she only nibbles here and there. I had no problem getting you to eat, you were always hungry."
I glared at him, but found his words amusing to say the least. "You and my father are the cause of my past obesity," I accused. He sheepishly smiled and pushed my plate towards me, urging me to eat. "To answer your question as to how I got her to eat, I just motivated her. I told her that if she finished, Clay would give her a hug and kiss."
Jives shook his head at the thought when he took a seat next to little Heather. "I don't know what I'm going to do when we have to return home. I can't take Clay with us."
Heather's head snapped up and I braced myself for impact. He really shouldn't have said that. Jax and Avery immediately covered their ears, both expecting the worse. "Clay can't go?" she whimpered.
Jives cursed under his breath when he saw the gobs of tears forming in his eyes. "I'm sorry, sweetheart, but he has to stay here," he said in a hushed tone, hoping to keep her calm.
"No!" she wailed. Jives sighed and pulled her into his arms as she cried. It broke my heart seeing her so upset, she was like a sister to me after all. I wish there was a way I could make her feel better, but there was only one person who could console her at this time.
When Clay rushed in upon hearing the commotion, he immediately scooped her up in his arms and held her close. All of that fussing and crying she had started, ceased once she was in his arms, hugging onto his neck. "What's wrong, princess?" he cooed.
"I'm leaving and you can't go," she croaked.
Clay gave Jives a grave look. "Why would you tell her that?"
"It slipped."
Clay pressed his lips against Heather's forehead and made sure she knew, "When you leave, you can call me anytime, sweetheart." I was really hoping that he started getting calls at three in the morning when she couldn't sleep. It was an evil thing to wish on someone, but he yelled at me this morning and deserved it.
I shoveled pancakes into my mouth and got to spend a little time with Jives who reminded me that my father and brothers would be leaving for California tomorrow morning. I made a mental note to go see them before I went home today and to pop by Stella and Jack's to say hello as well.
"Charlie, we have to take the two love birds to school first," Clay mentioned. "Princess, you can stay with me if it's alright with your father."
"Actually, I haven't been able to spend much time with her, so she and I are having a daddy day," Jives spoke up. "There is a carnival happening a town over that I'm going to take her to." Heather's eyes lit up at the thought. Not even Clay was a match for cotton candy and carnival games.
Clay reluctantly handed Heather over, but not before she collected the hug and kiss I had promised he would give her for eating all of her food. He squeezed her tight and laid a smooch onto her cheek that caused her whole face to react by flashing a bright red. I'm pretty sure Clay didn't need a girlfriend. He needed a bunch of kids to take care of who have had rough lives. Heather's life hasn't been easy breezy, I think that's why he cared so much about her. I know he lost his mom at a young age, it only made sense that he would want to make someone like him smile.
"Bring me back some cotton candy, beautiful," he requested from her. She flashed him a thumbs up to let him know she would and snuggled up to her father.
Jives tugged me up from my seat to wrap an arm around me."You and Brant should come over for dinner tonight, we're having steak."
There wasn't a doubt in my mind that Brant would want to go. He loves spending time with family, and I'm sure he missed being around everyone since he accustomed to being around them twenty-four seven. I hugged Jives back and placed a kiss on his cheek. "I'm about ninety-nine percent sure we'll be there."
"Good, because tomorrow I'm leaving too, and I need to spend time with my little girl before I go." He ruffled my hair, cluing in that he meant me before he exited the room with the bubbling Heather who was excited about the carnival. "See you later!" he tossed over his shoulder.
We all said goodbye to him and Heather, then returned to our normal breakfast routines. I finished stuffing my face full of the delicious pancakes Clay had made in record time when I saw that he was preparing to wash dishes. I handed him my plate when I finished and knocked him in the side with my hip.
"Do you want help with the dishes?" I politely asked, even if he hadn't been very nice to me earlier.
He looked up from the sudsy water in the sink to smile gratefully at me. "Thanks, Charlie," he said when I stood next to him to rinse. It was no big deal, I knew how easier it was to do the dishes when you have someone to help out.
Avery and Jax caught up on some homework they didn't finish yesterday while Clay and I quickly washed up the dishes from breakfast before it was time for them to leave for school. During the process of making sure their plates were clean, I let my bitterness from this morning's incident dissolve. He had probably been just as anxious about today as I have been, and him being half naked as soon as I arrived was definitely not what I had signed up for. Brant would've killed him if he was here. He might still kill him after I go home and tell him.
Despite that awkward start of my first day at work, the rest of the day began to go smoothly. Clay and I took Avery and Jax to school as planned. It took me about ten minutes to say goodbye to them. I even mom hugged the two sophomores and kissed them farewell. They didn't mind, they hugged me tight and told me that they loved me.
"Watch her," I told Jax, nudging my thumb in Avery's direction.
"I will," he grinned.
They held one another close on their way towards the school and were immediately surrounded by their friends. It made me think of how in grade school I didn't have that many friends. Everyday I found myself wishing that I could return to Motown, that I could return to Brant. It never happened and I was determined not to be the same loser once I stepped foot into junior high.
"Charlotte, we have to go," Clay said from inside the truck. I reluctantly tore myself away from the sight of the two teens to join my ex in his truck. "Pacino really needs for us to change that bandage of his." I didn't waste any more time, I hopped into the truck to head back to his house.
There wasn't an ounce of awkward in the atmosphere between him and I. Clay and I were able to talk like we always do when we're together. He asked about how things were going and I replied with that they were great. I asked him how his dad was and he replied with that he was still taking care of his sick grandfather. He's been gone for a while but Clay was plenty capable of taking care of himself and Jax.
"Are you going to cry when Heather leaves tomorrow?" I asked specifically to get a laugh out of him.
"Cry, no," he chuckled. "I will miss her though."
In just three days, she had completely stolen his heart. Clay seemed to be very impressionable. He fell in love with me within a week and now he's letting a four year old take up all of his time because she loved him and he couldn't help but care for her. She was the only girl who didn't understand his past or judge him for it. She loved him no matter what.
"Hey, Charlie?" I nodded when I saw him glance over at me. He lifted a hand off of the steering wheel to reach over and pinch my cheek. "I'm sorry for flipping out on you this morning." It had already been forgotten. "I'm trying not to mess up the one shot Brant has given me."
All of it was perfectly understandable. He had a conniption fit over that slightly awkward situation simply because he was trying his best to keep what trust he did have with Brant safe. If he and I would have been alone during it, I'm sure that one accident would have been a deal breaker for Brant. I made a mental note to remind myself to call before I came to the Holt's house from now on.
"Are you okay?" he asked, concerned. I realized being silent wasn't very comforting to him. "Charlotte, please talk to me."
I let my head fall gently against the truck window. The smile that slowly stretched across my lips had to be confusing to him. There was no way I could be angry for something like that. I should have guessed what was wrong in the first place instead of internally feeling grumpy about it. I swear I'm as clueless as a newborn baby at times.
"Don't think about it too much, Clay," was my advice. "We're friends, so it's okay to act like friends."
I never expected such a huge sigh of relief to come exhaling out of him. His shoulders slumped from their tense position, adding on to his relief. "You have no clue how on edge I have been! I do love you Charlotte, but I don't want you."
I gave him a bland look that made him laugh. He reached over and pinched my cheek again, forcing a smile out of me. "I mean, if you weren't with Brant I would definitely want you. Everything about you is beautiful, from your baby blue eyes to your enchanting smile and laugh. Then there's this thing you do with your nose..."
I hit him in the arm to bring him back to earth and far away from whatever he was thinking. His reflexes kicked in, causing him hit me back unexpectedly. "Clay!" I shrieked, punching him in the bicep.
"I have a little brother, hitting back comes naturally!" he defended, slapping my leg. "As I was saying..." I hit his arm again, knocking another laugh out him. "I still have feelings for you, but I'm not going to let that get in the way of my last chance. I'm hoping that you're hard headed fiancé sees that."
I couldn't help but snort in response. It was going to take a lot to drill his trust into Brant's head. There was no telling what he was feeling right now at work. He could be anxious about leaving Clay and I alone or he might even be angry at me right now. I wouldn't know how his day has been until we were reunited tonight. Until then I could only hope for the best.
Clay and I returned to his house within a couple of minutes and went straight to work with Pacino once we stepped foot on his property. The moment I laid eyes on the traumatized buckskin horse shied away in the corner of his stall was the moment I fell in love with him. His sleek tan coat was tainted by scars made from a knife. He was covered in halfway healed wounds and shook in fear when either myself or Clay would move even the slightest inch. Bolt had been bad, but this horse was ten times worse.
I let my eyes find the bandage on his leg that clearly needed changing from how stained and loose it had become. There was no way that horse was going to let me near his leg, but I had to try and at least gain his trust. "Can I go in?" I asked.
"No way," Clay replied. "I'm going to bring him out and I'm hoping that you can pet him up long enough for me to change his gauze right quick."
He retrieved a lead rope from his tack room and entered Pacino's stall with caution. The first thing I notice that he did was make sure the abused horse saw his hands. It was clear to me that he wasn't going to hurt Pacino, but of course the horse didn't know that and darted to the other corner of the stall when Clay neared him.
Clay spoke to the horse in a calming tone, trying his best to show that he meant no harm, but Pacino distanced himself every time Clay tried stepping closer to him. "Come on, Cino, we need to change that bandage," Clay sighed. I've only seen Clay extremely upset once in my life and that's when we broke up. He was hurting because he knew this horse wouldn't survive an infection. We had to change that bandage as soon as possible.
I couldn't stand seeing Clay so distraught, so I stepped in and pushed him out the stall so that it was just Pacino and I. "Charlotte, get out of there!" Clay yelled when he saw the horse flare his nostrils and raise on his hind legs in defense mode.
I was too terrified to move, so I didn't, not even when Clay grabbed my hand to pull me out of the stall. I shook off his hand and watched as Pacino let his front feet hit the ground. He and I were face to face, practically a breath away, but I didn't move. I believe he saw the fear in my eyes of being hurt by him and that's what calmed him. He didn't want me to feel like how he felt, I honestly believed that.
I lifted my hand to touch him, only to halt when I saw him jerk his head back unsurely. "Woah, boy," I hushed him when he grunted anxiously. "I'm not going to hurt you." He curiously sniffed my hand and kept his eyes on me to make sure I wasn't a threat.
Clay slowly stepped up next to Pacino and cautiously brushed his fingers down the horse's neck. Pacino looked to him, but remained still as Clay let his hand fall down his leg until he was able to kneel and start unraveling the bandage. The cut was still bad, but thankfully healing perfectly in Clay's eyes. He knew enough about horses to know whether or not something was wrong so I trusted what he said.
We let the cut air out for a while and did some trust exercises with Pacino while we waited. Clay gave me some some apple slices and instructed me to give one to Pacino. I held out a single apple slice on my palm and let Pacino gobble it up. "Now that he knows you have food, stand on one end of the stall and see if he'll come to you," were Clay's next orders.
I walked backwards away from Pacino until I was up against the opposite wall from him. I placed another apple slice in my hand and allowed him to see it. At first he was hesitant, he paced back and forth uncertainly. When I tossed the piece of apple into my mouth he halted to a stop and snorted at me. I showed him another piece and he wasted no time trotting up to retrieve it before I ate that one too.
"Good boy," I giggled as I lightly stroked his nose.
"Again," Clay told me.
Back and forth Pacino and I went. Clay sat on a stool inside of the stall and cut up the apples while I walked up and down the stall gaining Pacino's trust. I was doing all of the work, but when Clay whistled after thirty minutes and held up a whole apple, Pacino had no problem walking up to Clay. He let Clay touch him and wrap up his leg without a fuss. You would've thought that Pacino would have only been close to me. I guess not.
"How did you do that?" I asked Clay on our way out the barn. He gave me a questioning glance. "I had to walk with apples for thirty minutes to gain his trust. He trusted you right away and you were sitting down the whole time."
Clay laughed and ruffled my hair. "You need to be more observant, Charlie. He came to me because he knew I had all the apples and was offering him one. Didn't you see how he kept glancing at me every time I handed you a sliced apple. He knew I had them, but you were the one feeding him. It wasn't until you didn't have anymore apples did he resort to taking one from me."
Clay could be so smart that it made me hate him. He saw how I scowled at him and smugly smiled in return. "Is there anything else you want me to do while I'm here?" I asked.
"I heard Stella went out and bought every wedding planner book known to man, you should go see her."
I decided to do just that. Brant and I had an idea of what we wanted to do for the wedding, but it would be nice to look at flower arrangements or color schemes since I haven't done that yet and I only have a couple of months to prepare. Sitting down with Stella and preparing for this thing sounded wonderful. All we needed were some pajamas and some tea.
I thanked Clay for today when he walked me to my truck to say goodbye. We shared a friendly hug that last all of three seconds and he closed the door to my truck when I was safely inside. "Friday, I need for you to come back so we can move on to the next part of training," he let me know. "And roll this window up before you catch a cold."
"You're just as bad as Brant," I sighed. "Goodbye, Clay."
He laughed and waved as I drove off to continue my day that has gotten ten times busier than I thought it was going to be. It only took a moment to reach the Young's house, which I was thankful for. I was ready to get into some pajamas and spend time with one of the most amazing women on this earth.
Much to my surprise, she wasn't the only amazing woman here. I got out of my truck and walked straight through the door like how I always do when I walked into my second home, that's when I heard her. Stella was cooking in the kitchen by the smell of it and I could hear a familiar female voice that didn't belong to Stella talking about me.
I kicked off my boots, tugged off my jacket, and left the items at the door to go investigate what was going on in the kitchen. "I want to know everything about Charlotte. She's so busy with Brant now that getting to know her hasn't been as easy as it has been with the twins."
No matter how much I wanted to stop the conversation there by making my presence known, I remained hidden for a couple more minutes to head Stella's response. "Well..." I heard her sigh. "I know just about everything her own mother knew about her, but I don't think it's my place to tell you her likes and dislikes or all of her past troubles. You need be patient and wait for her to open up to you."
Thank goodness for Stella! I didn't want to scare Angelica off because I haven't opened up to her yet, I'd never forgive myself for scaring off such a remarkable woman that was a hundred percent perfect for my father. He deserved someone who would love and cherish him. With what Angelica has faced, she was the only woman I knew who could do that. My father would never speak to me again if I ruined this for him. I just wasn't ready to be that close to her yet.
I walked back to the front door, torn on what to do. Would Angelica leave my father because she couldn't reach out to me and be a mother? I didn't want that to happen, but about ninety percent of my wellbeing wasn't comfortable with sharing my heartache with her. I don't really know her, naturally I wouldn't be.
I opened the front door only to slam it closed so that they heard me. "Mom!" I yelled, automatically smiling. They didn't have to question who I was calling, Stella knew it was her. She came rushing into the living room to see me like how she always does.
"Hey, beautiful," she and I said in unison upon meeting halfway for a hug. I buried my face in her shoulder, squeezing her longer than normal. Stella means so much to me. I hope she realizes how much I love her and how I would do anything for her if it meant seeing her happy.
"You okay, sweetheart?" she asked in her concerned mommy tone. She stroked my back, comforting me even though she had no clue as to what was going through my head. I missed my mom, there was nothing else to it. Angelica is great and I'm glad she wants to get to know me, but she will never come close to my relationship with my mother or Stella. They knew me better than my own self because they raised me. Angelica didn't get that opportunity.
I couldn't find the words to answer Stella in order to let her know I was okay. I settled for a simple nod, though it seemed to have worried her more. We pulled away, but she cupped my face and placed a kiss on my forehead. My mother use to do the same thing to me whenever I was upset. "I'm going to make some tea," I murmured. "I was hoping we could go over some wedding plans. Clay said something about some wedding planned books you bought."
Of course Stella's eyes lit up when I mentioned the wedding. "I'll go get them!" She went to rush upstairs, but made a u-turn back to me. "And sweetheart, talk to Angelica a little," she whispered. "You don't have to tell her your life story, but show that you like her."
I guess I haven't really shown that to her, only towards her son, Chase. Stella and I went separate ways, on separate missions. She went to go retrieve my future and I went to get to know my dad's. I was hoping she was his future, she sounded like a great one for him. She had every quality I've ever wanted for my dad. Being beautiful was a must have for him because he deserved to have someone gorgeous to hold. She had to be a family woman, which I'm sure she was. But the most important thing for me was that she had to be loving. I'm almost certain she had all those qualities.
When I stepped into the kitchen, she immediately knew I was there. I could tell she wanted to say something, but she didn't make a peep. I didn't know what say either, so I went to the cabinet above the sink and fetched myself a bag of tea to put on.
"Chase misses you," she brought up. "He won't stop talking about you, actually."
I glanced over my shoulder at her to see that she was nervously wiping her hand down the front of her nurse scrubs. "I miss him too, he reminds me of Brant." He was a charmer like Brant had been when he was little. The only people who have ever made my heart gush when they told me I was beautiful were Brant and Chase. Those two were so much alike that it made me question who Chase's father was, though I was sure it couldn't be Brant.
"He does?" she giggled. "Does Brant pick his nose and wipe it on his shirt too?"
I couldn't help but laugh at her joke. "No," I answered, amused. "At least I don't think so." I poured my boiling hot water from the kettle into a tea cup with my tea bag and let it steep. "Chase is just really considerate to girls' feelings like how Brant was when he was little. Brant never went through the stage of thinking girls were stupid. I would say he treated everyone equal, but really he just loved me."
I totally seduced him first.
I loved thinking back to those days and reminiscing on how much Brant and I cared for one another back then. That part of our love story would never get old to me. I could still feel how his words to me then made me feel all those years ago. When he told me I was beautiful and that I was his, he made me feel so accepted and loved. No one could have me, I was his girl and he was proud of that. Back then I didn't worry about what anyone had to say because he was there to prove their negativity wrong. Then I moved and my self-esteem plummeted so low that I was just a husk of a little girl walking the halls of my schools wishing that someone, anyone, would walk up to me for once and tell me that I wasn't worthless instead of calling me fat and ugly behind my back.
All those emotions from the bad part of my childhood made me thankful for Brant even more. He's helped me far more than a psychiatrist could ever think of helping me, and I've been to a handful of the best shrinks known to man. No one has ever gotten to me like he has. He was exactly what I needed.
"Your dad told me a little bit about how Brant was so overprotective and selfish when it came to you."
"Was?" I chuckled. "He still is, it's just not to the extent to where he's crying and telling everyone off for holding me longer than he would like for them to." She laughed at the thought. "Those are my favorite stories though."
Once my tea was ready, I was ready to slip into some pajamas and get cracking on those wedding books. "Would you like to come look at the wedding planners with us?" I politely asked. It would be my first step of getting to know her better, that is if she accepted.
"I would love to," she smiled.
We went to the living room where I left my tea on the coffee table to go upstairs to Brant's room to see if he left any clothes here that I could change into. Today was my lucky day, for when I entered his room, a pile of freshly washed and dried clothes were sitting on his bed neatly folded by Stella. She probably figured he would come looking for a certain shirt one day and it will be sitting right here waiting for him.
I carefully searched through the pile and was satisfied when I found a Hanes cotton tee and a pair of his sweat pants. I changed into the clothes, leaving mine behind for when I headed home. Stella had beat me back to the living room with at least ten different wedding catalogs for us to go through. "Got comfortable, I see," she said when I took a seat next to her on the couch and leaned into her side to cuddle up to her like how I use to do my own mother. "Do you miss him?"
Unfortunately, I couldn't bask in his scent like I usually do when I steal his shirts to lounge around in. Instead of it smelling like his spicy cologne, it radiated a fresh linen scent. "I miss him more than a turtle misses it's shell."
Stella wrapped her arms around me, quietly snickering at my saying. "Sweetheart, a turtle dies without it's shell, it wouldn't be alive to miss it. Their shell is literally a piece of them."
"Exactly," I sighed. "Brant is a piece of me too, and I feel dead on the inside."
I grabbed my tea and took a sip of the hot liquid. I hadn't realized that I had grabbed a peppermint tea packet, but it was just what I needed. "I'm so glad that you and Brant fell in love. I know my son and I can promise you that you won't ever regret marrying him. There might be times when he infuriates you, but you will never hate that you fell in love with him."
She didn't have to tell me, I already knew. I grabbed one of the wedding catalogs and insisted we start searching for things. If I kept thinking about him, it would eventually lead to me slipping off into depression. This was suppose to be a happy time, we were looking for ideas for my wedding after all.
I gave Stella her space even if I like being so close to her and feeling that motherly love that she always wrapped me up in. I sat up on the couch and flipped open the magazine I picked up which just so happened to be all about color schemes. "I know you want pink," Stella teased when she saw what I was browsing through. I playfully stuck my tongue out at my future mother-in-law, but she had hit the nail on the head.
"I don't just want to use pink," I corrected. "I need another color."
"You should do pink and blue," Angelica suggested. "Then you won't have to deal with a bunch of guys complaining about having to wear pink."
Angelica's idea was so great that I spent the next hour trying to decide what shade of blue to go with. Navy blue was gorgeous with a bright pink, but any bright blues available on the palette were beautiful too. A Caribbean blue was one of our favorites. There were so many choices and only one wedding. How could I possibly decide on one color that would become a huge part of my wedding memories? It seemed impossible!
I eventually decided to push the color scheme away for a while to look at bridesmaid dress styles with Stella. This was a little easier than the color scheme selections. I hated half of the dresses in the magazines and the other half could easily be weeded out to suit what I wanted my bridesmaids to wear. I wanted something simple for them, but not boring.
I didn't know that while Stella and I were checkin out those dresses, Angelica had gone hard to work in a bridal based catalog specifically focused on the bride's attire. Stella and I had just confirmed that we both liked the decent chiffon dresses with a drooping bow hanging on the hip when Angelica shot up out of the recliner with her hand clasped over her mouth and eyes widened at the photo in the magazine resting in her palm.
"You okay, Angel?" I asked, concerned. She was almost green in the face, that's how shocked she appeared to be.
She slowly looked up at me as she lowered her hand from her mouth. "Charlotte, you need this dress!" She shoved the magazine into my hands and let me see it for myself.
There, on that sleek thin page, was my dream dress. My jaw dropped at the sight of the light weight looking ruffles that looked absolutely beautiful with the high-low skirt of the dress that fell down into a beautiful train. The tight bodice lightly dusted in diamond-like gems that formed a floral pinstripe down the side of the dress and crossed over to where the skirt started only added to the radiance of the dress. Everything about this dress was me. It felt like it was the only dress beautiful enough for me to marry Brant in.
"Unless you're going to fly to Paris, you better find another dress, sweetheart," Stella pointed out when she adverted my eyes to the small banner below the feet of the model that said it was only available in the bridal shop located in Paris, France.
I groaned in disappointment and shoved the catalog away from me. "Angelica!" I whined. "Why didn't you look at that before you got my hopes up?!" She smiled apologetically and opened another magazine. "I just want to take a nap now," I went on to complain.
Stella insisted that I go upstairs to Brant's room, but the couch was too comfortable to get up from. I curled up with the color palette magazine at the free end of the sofa and rested, going back to searching for that perfect shade of blue. "Charlotte, if you're tired just go to sleep, honey," Stella practically scolded. She took the magazine from me and tossed the throw blanket nearby over my body. I sunk down, allowing my weary eyes to fall shut.
My body wasn't what was tired, it was my mind. Between thinking about Brant and getting excited about the wedding, all the missing him and planning our wedding was turning my brain into mush. "Dog ear pages you want me to look at," I mumbled.
"We will, now take a nap," Stella ordered. "I'm sure it's what Brant would want."
She was right about that one. Color schemes and dress styles wouldn't be important to him compared to seeing me get some rest. The wedding plans could wait until I was refreshed and energized after a hour nap. It had no choice, because before I knew it, I was out like a light.
I drifted off into dreams full of Brant Young and our future together. He was almost like an obsession. I just couldn't get enough of that boy for some reason, and there were times where I should've had enough of him, but I always come back for more. No matter what he tossed my way, I couldn't find it in me to say that I was through with it all. Love kept whispering that I would be stupid to let someone as amazing as him go.
It wasn't anything new to me that I dreamt of him, I do it on more than one occasion. He was literally the man of my dreams. Now since he has proposed and I was realizing that all of this was real, that he felt the same way about me as I felt so strongly about him, my dreams have become more romantic and exotic, but not in the way some might think.
I suddenly began dreaming about him and I visiting Paris together and sharing a kiss under the Eiffel Tower. It was the most beautiful dream I had ever witnessed.
There we were, wrapped up in one another's arms so tightly that not even a piece of decorative tissue paper could slide in between us. He was smiling at me and I him. The kiss to come was evident with how our eyes sparkled when we took each other into view. No other details, not even our location, was more important than the way he told me he loved me and kissed me like he meant it.
It felt all so realistic, I even woke up to my heart pounding in my chest from the emotion of what I just dreamt. The living room was deserted, thank goodness. Stella or Angelica would've thought I was nuts if they would have witnessed me waking because the first thing I did was grab my chest in panic. I let myself settle back in the couch, but heard some familiar voices that made my heart jump some more.
I hopped up from the couch into a stretching pose to wake up my body. Into the kitchen I padded, eager to see my brothers who were making a mess in Stella's kitchen by the sound of it. Cale smiled when I walked up to him where he was leaned against the counter and nuzzled my face into his chest.
"Hey there, sleepy head," he murmured in my hair. I sleepily smiled to myself when he wrapped his arms around me in a gentle hug.
"Why does Cale get a hug first?" Caleb complained. "I'm making you and that thing your marrying food for tonight!"
I pulled my face away from Cale's chest just to say, "He get's a hug first because he doesn't call my fiancé a thing."
Caleb rolled his eyes and tugged me over into his side to blow a raspberry kiss on my forehead and squeeze me tight. "I miss you, squirt."
"I miss you too..." Cale feigned a cough to remind me he was here too. "You too, buddy," I giggled when I linked my arm with his. "What are you cooking, Caleb?"
I peered around him to see he was preparing steaks. "Apparently, dad thinks that you don't eat at home so he insisted on cooking a feast for tonight. He's outside right now firing up the grill in the freezing cold to cook the steaks on."
Leave it to my dad to go to these kind of lengths just to have a family dinner before they left for who knows how long. I left my brothers in the kitchen to keep doing what they were doing, which was destroying the kitchen and probably leaving a mess for Stella to clean up later. I walked outside to the back patio and laid eyes on my father who was holding Angelica close and talking to her as he watched over a couple of steaks already on the grill.
Angelica spotted me before I could slip back inside and give them some over due alone time. "Charlotte, come over and tell your father how much you want that wedding gown," she urged with a wink. It was the internationally known signal by every woman to let you know that he had been softened up.
"I don't mean to interrupt," I spoke quietly. "The dress isn't that important." There were a million other wedding dresses in the world that I could choose from, their relationship was more important right now.
"Charlotte Anne Jackson, get over here," my father ordered. I waddled over to where he stood at the grill and flashed him a little smile. He ran a hand down my hair when he returned my smile. "Is that the dress you want, princess?" He nodded towards the opened catalog resting in a fold out chair next to the grill.
I glanced at the photo, laying eyes on that beautiful dress once again. "I love it, but it's in Paris," I explained.
"Then we'll fly to Paris and buy it, Charlotte." I gave him a look that expressed how I felt about that idea without using any words. That was too extravagant and outrageous. It was one thing to spend all that money to fly to Paris, but it flying to Paris and buying a very expensive wedding dress was something far beyond that. I couldn't let him do that.
"Listen to me..." A sorrow overtook his eyes and his expression hardened. "I was flat broke when your mother and I got married. Her engagement ring cost more than her dress did. She didn't ask for much because she knew I couldn't afford it and that our parents didn't support our decision on getting married, so she never got to get the wedding dress she truly wanted."
"Dad..."
He hushed me and brushed my hair behind my ears. "I want you to have more than a twenty dollar white dress from a shop. Your mother deserved more and you do too." I couldn't refuse the hug he pulled me into, I knew he needed it just as much as I did. "We're going to get that dress and that's final."
Being spoiled was nice, however it was times like these that it became uneasy. I know he wants his princess to have every she wants for her wedding day, but this even sounded insane to me. "Thanks, daddy," I said despite my wary feelings about this whole ordeal.
He kissed the crown of my head and let me slip out of his embrace to return inside. Unlike my father and Angelica, I wasn't wearing a coat or shoes for that matter. Words couldn't describe how cold I felt on my way back to the back door. Good thing Brant wasn't here or he would've let me have it for coming outside in this cold air without wearing anything to keep me warm.
"Oh, and Charlotte!" I looked over my shoulder when I heard my father say my name. "Brant called while you were resting, he didn't want to wake you so he made me swear that I would tell you that he loves you and he misses you."
I was disappointed that I had missed his call. The remaining hours of the day would be unbearable until I got to see him again. Lucky for me, I had two twin brother's and one crazy soon to be father-in-law to keep me entertained. The boys were born insane but Jack was crazy by choice which made him even crazier.
As soon as he saw me, he had to give me a big hug. "I was tempted to draw a mustache on you while you slept."
I gave a disapproving look. "Oh, really?"
"Yeah," he grinned. "I decided against it when I remembered that you're not married to Brant yet and that I didn't want to scare you off because there isn't another girl in the world who can put up with him except for his mother."
The more everyone talked about this wedding the more I saw how happy not only Brant and I were, but how happy our families were. Jack was a prime example of that. He wasn't the kind of man to expression emotions over things like this. I always took him as the type who would tell Brant and I to just go to the courthouse and get this over with. He has surprised me by being the complete opposite.
He asked if he and I could sit down and look over some bridal magazines together. I didn't recognize the man in front of me, he certainly wasn't Jack Young. He didn't care that the twins snickered at the thought of him picking out flower arrangements or decorations, he truly wanted to sit down and help me make a couple of decisions.
Brant was just like his father, I took that opportunity to get a clue as to what Brant might want in the wedding too. He would never speak his own opinion because he wanted this to be my special day, but it wasn't just about me. Thankfully he had a father who was willing to help in anyway he could.
Jack and I spent hours on the living room couch looking through magazines and then going back over them again and again as we narrowed down choices. Clay brought Avery home from school but Jax walked her to the door like a gentlemen. I watched from the couch when she shyly kissed Jax goodbye and left him stunned at the front door to race upstairs and get started on her homework.
Jack chuckled at the boy and flipped the page in the magazine he was holding. "He'll come back to us in a moment." Sure enough, after staring at nothing for a whole two minutes, his cheeks pooled a bright red and he ran a hand down his face in disappointment. He had been too shock by her kiss, a kiss she gave him in front of her father, that he didn't even get to tell her goodbye.
I slapped Jack in the stomach and quietly demanded that he invite Jax and Clay over tonight. I'm sure my dad bought more than enough steaks for everyone because he was a bulk buyer. Jack grumbled under his breath something along the lines of, "He's stealing my baby from me," but couldn't tell me no when I gave him pitiful face.
"Jax, go tell Clay that we're having a big dinner tonight and you two are staying."
Jax brightly smiled and hurried to tell Clay to get his butt inside so he could go spend more time with Avery. "You're an amazing man, Jack Young." I kissed his cheek for being so kind.
"Yeah, yeah," he grumbled. "Caribbean blue or Celeste blue?"
I peeked over at the color palette he was looking over. It amazed that Celeste blue was actually a color option. "Definitely Celeste blue!"
"Good choice, it matches your eyes," Jack replied.
"So I've been told."
Our father-in-law and daughter moment was interrupted when Jack realized it was time to feed all of his animals. I offered to help, I wasn't doing anything else, but he declined and told me to stay here and ponder over my future. He kissed the top of my head and left me alone to plan more. It was nice to have people around you to help plan, however I enjoyed my quiet time with the wedding catalogs as well.
Everyone had their own opinions on what I should do. They think I should hold a certain type of roses, or should wear a certain type of veil. Their plans were beautiful, but I wasn't quite sure if that's what I wanted or not. I sat there on the sofa, lost in my head as I tried picturing how this wedding would look.
Planning that perfect day was harder than it seemed, I was finding that our real quick. Almost everything caught my eye, it was all so gorgeous. Right in the midst of the excitement of seeing whatever spectacular thing I came across, my eyes would flicker to the outrageous prices that came with beauty. I wasn't a girl who could look at a price tag in the thousands and dismiss it as nothing anymore. My daddy still had money, but maturity has set in and I realize how ridiculous overspending was.
Jax and Clay entered the house in the middle of my planning. "Long time no see," Clay said when he walked past to go to the kitchen. He ruffled my hair on his way by and ignored my glare.
Jax tossed his arms around my neck from behind the couch and told me a hello. I turned my head and kissed his freckle covered cheek. "Hey handsome," was my reply to his hello.
He smiled bashfully at me. "Thank you, Charlotte, I know what you did." I feigned innocence by looking away and claiming that I had no clue as to what he was talking about. "You're my second favorite girl," he told me. "I'll talk to you later?"
I gave a nod and continued browsing through my catalogs while he rushed off to see Avery. There was about a ninety-eight percent chance that we wouldn't talk later and I was okay with that as long as he was so wrapped up in Avery that he didn't even think about talking to anyone else. I didn't doubt for a second whether or not he would be, I knew he would.
I was sitting there with my magazines, just passing time until dinner, when the front door unexpectedly opened and in walked a man and woman I have never met before in my whole entire life with little Chase. When he saw me, his face lit up, mirroring my own no doubt. He rushed inside, tossing off his cowboy printed back-pack and kicking off his boots to get as comfortable as possible for when he reached me.
The moment he dived into my arms, my day was made. He snuggled close to me for warmth and I didn't hesitate to make sure he was comfortable. His cheeks were pink from the cold, it made an instinct kick in to remove the blanket from around me and wrap him up in it. "I've missed you, Charlotte," he made known when I wrapped my arms around him to warm him up.
"I've missed you too, buddy." He smiled at the thought. "How was your day?"
An awkward cough made me look up from Chase before he could tell me anything about his life as a first grader. The strangers were still here and I hadn't bothered to introduce myself. "Is Angelica around?" the greying beautiful woman asked. "We want to say hello before we leave."
I sat Chase to the side and stood to my feet. It didn't hit me until after I walked up to them that I must look like a troll with how I was dressed and I was certain my hair was a mess. For now, I ignored my terrible first impression apparel and introduced myself like how I should've down moments ago.
"I'm Charlotte, and you are?"
The woman smiled bright, but the man remained calm and casual. "We're Angelica's parents," she explained. "I'm Denise and this is Rob." The man nodded to say hello.
"It's nice to meet you then," I tossed out. "Angelica is on the back patio with my dad cooking steaks. You can get there through the kitchen."
They thanked me for directions and were on their way. I rejoined Chase on the couch to see he had picked up one of the magazines and was thumbing through it like an adult. "I like this color," he told me when I sat down next to him. It beat all I have ever seen when his little fingertip landed on Celeste blue.
He and I sat there for the longest time together with me explaining why I was planning this ceremony and why he was going to have to wear a suit and carry fake rings down the aisle. "But suits make me sweaty," he whined. "Do I have to?"
I patted his hair, giving in immediately when I saw how uncomfortable he was with the idea of wearing a suit. "Alright, handsome, you don't have to."
He didn't crack a smile, instead he frowned a little at me. I thought he would've been over ecstatic to get his way, but that wasn't the case. "Are you sure?" he asked. "Are you mad at me?"
I tugged him in and kissed the top of his head. "No, Ace, I'm not mad." He snuggled closer to me to see if I held him. I encircled my arms around him to hug him tightly to me. "Suits are overrated for boys your age anyway," I dismissed.
He made sure I knew he would wear the shirt underneath the suit and that he would wear a tie. I thanked him for being so considerate. There weren't many boys who were willing to wear a tie for anyone, Jack Young was one of those boys.
"Charlotte, I'm hungry," he murmured with a pained expression.
"The twins are in the kitchen, they'll make you a snack." That was all I had say before he was up and zipping into the kitchen. I knew the twins would take care of him, they loved that little guy too much not to.
The front door opened for what seemed the millionth time today. I don't know when I've become the greeter for this home, but I wasn't getting paid enough to do it. This time I didn't mind greeting the person at the door, I hadn't minded before, but I really didn't care this time. What on earth was he doing here so early?
He had showered, brought along Diesel, and still had time to pick up a single pink rose for me apparently. I wasn't dressed appropriately for a moment like this, but I guess that went along with the whole surprise theme. I hardly had time to stand up before he was in front of me, wearing a charming smile that said he had planned this ahead of time.
"Good afternoon, pretty lady," he purred. "What does a guy have to do to get a kiss from someone as beautiful as you?" Apparently not much with how urgently I smushed my lips against his. "Ow, Charlotte!" he hissed when my tooth nicked his lower lip.
"I'm sorry," I apologized. Then I saw his lip bleeding just a little and found myself saying, "Shit, I'm so sorry."
He chuckled and wrapped his arms around me. "It's alright, babe." I gave him a worried look that he smiled reassuringly at. He cupped my face with one of his hands, pulling me back in to sweetly kiss me hello. I don't know why I figured getting to the point was so much better than taking our time. His slow and heartfelt kiss was ten times sweeter than any urgent kiss that was rushed.
He moved his full lips with mine, expressing through the kiss alone how much he missed me. I stepped into his kiss more and wrapped my arms around his torso to hold him close. He has no clue how empty I feel when he's not with with me. "I know, Char, I missed you too," I heard him whisper. It was like he could read my mind.
He kept my face in his hand, even when our emotions were too strong to continue our kiss. His eyes were so happy to see me that I couldn't help but squeeze him a little tighter to show how desperate I felt to be near him as well. The way he softly grazed his thumb across my chin and brushed our noses together, it all was something I have missed during the day. He was one of a kind with no substitutes available. I was going to miss him regardless of what I do to try and not think about how he's not with me.
We sat down together on the couch where he handed me the rose he had brought and told me flat out, "I love you."
"I love you too, Brant."
He smiled at me and held up one of the bridal magazines I have went over with almost everyone here in the last couple of hours. "Have you been looking at these all day?" he asked. I shyly nodded in reply. "Well what have you decided? I want to see everything."
I knew the moment we sat down together on that couch and began to flip through the catalogs that Brant Young loved me more than I could ever imagine. After another long day at work, even after he went through all the trouble to pick up a rose on his way home and shower on before he came here, he still was willing to do even more for me.
I snuggled into his side wearing the biggest of smiles. I was happy as a little lark with just being next to him and showing what I would like to have for our wedding after this long day. He liked the bridesmaid dresses and the ideas for the flower bouquet arrangements that he and Austin would have to get in touch with the Cavallos to prepare flowers for.
"Caribbean or Celeste blue?" I asked him with a knowing smile.
He brushed his nose lovingly against mine upon leaning in close to look into my eyes. "Celeste blue, of course." I couldn't help the way my heart lurched when he brushed his fingertips through my hair and kept looking at me as if I was the most beautiful thing he had ever laid eyes on.
I tried looking away when he did this, though it seemed impossible when his stare made me feel like the princess my father has always claimed me to be. I was a fool if I ever thought this anxiety attack feeling that made my heart pound would ever dull during our relationship and our marriage. He would always give me butterflies and I will always feel embarrassed by how he wanted everyone he crosses paths with to know that I was his girl. I would forever be stuck with these overwhelming emotions he gave me and I didn't care a bit.
"Stop looking at me like that," I finally groaned. It was beginning to become painful for me to gaze into his love filled eyes.
"Like what?" he whispered. He made sure to shoot me a flirty wink to make me melt even more on the inside. "Am I making you uneasy, baby?" Nothing was cuter than when he called me baby, so I wasn't just uneasy, I was inwardly fan-girling over this moment.
"Stop, doing that," I squeaked, too weak to pull away from him and break the spell he was putting me under. He knew exactly what to say or do in order to make me squirm. It wasn't fair because I had no clue what I do that's unnerving to him.
"Why on earth would I stop making you feel nice about yourself?" was his reply. "You deserve to feel as gorgeous as you look." The breath was knocked out of me when he softly kissed my lips, only to drag his lips across my cheek to my ear. "I hate that when I came home today I didn't get to see you in your underwear again."
"You poor baby," I murmured teasingly.
"It was heartbreaking," he replied when he kissed my earlobe. "But I know you'll make it up to me later because you think I'm so sexy that you can't help but want me. Isn't that right?"
I scoffed and pretended that he didn't effect me enough to go that far, but so far there hasn't been a time I've been able to refuse him. He was just so beautiful and such a great lover that he couldn't be denied. I don't have any self-control at all when it comes to him. He leads and I let him do as he pleases because it always ends well for the both of us.
"Y-You need to stop feeding your ego lies," I stuttered out. His brows rose curiously. "It causes tumors."
"You're so cute," he chuckled.
Without warning, he pushed me off the couch and onto the floor space between the coffee table and sofa so he could do a belly flop across of me. "Brant, I am not fighting you!" I yelled at him. I could win a wrestling match against Caleb any day, that wasn't the case with Brant.
"Why not?" he pouted. "Loser has to be on the bottom all night." I shushed him through my giggles before someone heard him. "Better yet, loser has to be tied to the bed."
"You're an idiot!" I laughed, shoving him in the chest.
He lowered his smiling lips onto mine and pulled my arms around him. "How about the loser buys breakfast in the morning before I go to work?" he tried once again.
If I knew I could win the match I would've taken that deal. "You know I won't beat you," I complained.
"Just try, baby," he whispered, his eyes begging for me to play along. I groaned and licked my pinky before I held it out to him. He responded by licking his pinky and wrapping it around mine to seal the deal. It was unsanitary, but serious. "You do realize that I didn't cancel out those other two wagers, right?"
"What!"
He immediately pinned me to the floor to give me no advantage. I didn't even try to fight back, there was no point in it. He kissed my lips repeatedly and told me to just try, that it was no fun winning when I gave up so easily. I opened my mouth to just go ahead and say mercy to get this over with, when he rolled over onto his back and let me lay on top of him.
He smiled sweetly at me as he took my hands in his and made me hold them above his head. "Mercy," he quietly spoke, forfeiting the wrestling match. "I stand no chance against your beauty. You can tie me up tonight and I promise to take you out tomorrow morning for breakfast."
Something told me that's what he wanted to happen in the first place, and that something may have been the subtle hint he gave moments ago. "All you had to say was that you wanted to take me out tomorrow morning, there was no need for all of this, babe."
He and I sat up on the floor together from our awkward position that would've been horrible if my brothers or father had stumbled across it. Gently, he held my hands in his and kissed the top of my hair. "I have never let you win a wrestling match before and I swore I never would. I guess love really does change a man because I felt like I should let you win at least once out of the million times that I will win."
To most it would've sounded like he was talking jerk again, thank goodness I understood him better than others or I would've hit him. This was actually one of the best compliments that his weird twisted mind could ever think up.
I didn't say a word about his odd compliment, but he must have assessed it in his mind and realized how bad it might have sounded. He ran a hand down his face and groaned in frustration. "I'm sorry, that sounded a lot better in my head."
A small burst of laughter came out of my mouth at his discomfort. He could only give an apologetic look and quickly give my lips peck to add to his apology. "It's alright," I told him. "Lucky for you I just so happen to speak Brant Young."
He smiled and with pure relief in his tone, he said, "I love you and you're ability to understand what I'm saying even when I don't."
Until dinner was ready, he and I sat on the living room floor undisturbed by anyone else. I was glad to be around friends and family, but the moment Brant walked into the room it became only him and I for a while.
I managed to tell him about the incident this morning that happened with Clay. He wasn't a happy camper when he heard about me stumbling across my ex half naked, however I managed to convince him that I thought he was superior in everyone. All it took was a promise to take my time with him tonight. He made me spit pinky swear that I would and I had no problem promising to it.
Stella called us in for dinner around six. Brant stood up to his feet then kindly help me to my feet as well. I turned to head towards the kitchen when he suddenly locked me up in his arms. "Hey, Char?" His hold on me loosened when I turned around in it to face him. "How much do you love me?" he asked with a wide grin.
"Too much," I giggled as a reply. "Now let's go eat!"
He stopped me from scurrying away to the kitchen once again by twirling me into his arms to press his lips affectionately against mine. We didn't move, we just let our lips enjoy the other's company. I stayed frozen in place even when he retracted his lips and embraced me in a tight hug. "I just had an urge to do that. It must be my sweatpants and shirt you're wearing."
"Behave," I insisted on our way to the kitchen. I was starving and he was depriving me of food.
"I'll try to behave, but you really make it hard to," he whispered in my ear along the way.
"Shut up."
He flicked his tongue against my earlobe right when we walked in and had everyone's attention. "I love you too, baby," he purred. To add to my embarrassment, he thrusted his hips into my back and sent me stumbling into the kitchen even further.
I swear I feel like I could hate him sometimes.
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AN:)
So I'm a little rusty, but hopefully this chapter is okay and gives you guys a fix for a little while. I'll try to upload the next chapter as soon as I can.
Thanks for your patience.