Back again for another chapter! Enjoy
Didn't proofread
Dave's POV
"They got you again." I look up at Faith who was laughing and leaned up against the threshold.
"Yeah, but I'll do anything for my princesses." I'm currently painting Kairi and Ella's toes.
"Well can you paint mine too? I can't exactly see or get to my feet." She giggled.
"Of course, baby." I smiled at her.
"I'll be in the room." She said and walked, well waddled, out of the girls room.
"When does my baby brother get here?" Kairi asked.
"Next month." Told her, focusing on painting her little toe nails. "Y'all excited?"
"Yes!" The both of them screamed. "We're gonna dress him up, have tea parties. Ouuu El we can paint his nails and toes too!" Kairi said to Ella.
"Nah I don't think that would be a good idea. He's going to be really small and sleeping most of the time. But maybe when he gets older he'll let y'all do that." I explained to them. They nodded in understanding. "Aight well I'm done. You like it?" I asked Kairi.
"Mhm. Thanks daddy." She kissed my cheek and Ella did the same.
I got up and left out of their room and walked down to our room to see Faith laying on the bed with a bag of chocolate covered almonds beside her. She tried to hurry up and hide them, but it was too late.
"Give em here." I demanded.
"David please." She whined. "I've been craving them so bad and I'm hungry." Her voice started to crack. I hate when she does this.
"No Faith. You supposed to eat healthy so my son can get his nutrients." I took them out of her hand.
"But what about me? I'm the one carrying him and I'm hungry for this. This is all I want to eat." What she said was mixed up in her crying.
I groaned. "Fine. Here." I tossed them back to her.
She sniffled and wiped her face, grabbing the bag and opening them back up. She laid back down on her side under the covers. She continued to sniffle.
"Okay that's enough." I said to her. "I gave you back the damn almonds." She still didn't say anything to me. I blew out a breath and got in bed and hugged her from behind. "I'm sorry."
"I forgive you." She mumbled.
I smacked my lips. "You such a fake." I laughed.
"I'm not. You did hurt my feelings. Dave I really am hungry and this is what I was craving. I've been doing good with my diet. What's the point of being pregnant if I can't eat what I want?"
"To bring a healthy new life into this world. That's the main priority." I pulled her into me while I held her from behind.
"I know and I'm doing that." She intertwined our fingers together and placed them on her stomach. "Can you believe we're about to have a baby together?"
"Hell yeah. I told you, you were the only person I wanted carrying the rest of my kids."
"Can I be honest with you?"
"Yeah what's up?" I said while I played with her wedding ring.
"I'm kind of nervous." Faith admitted. "I guess as time gets closer and closer to my due date, reality is starting to set in. I'm about to give birth and care for a newborn. Yeah I've had practice with the girls, but they were already toddlers. This is a new baby and I don't want to mess up or do anything wrong." She sniffed. "I just want to be the best mom."
"And you will be. I know that for a fact. You've done so good with Kairi and Ella. There's not a doubt in my mind that you will do the damn thing with our son." I rubbed her stomach and kissed her temple. "I love you, Faith."
She turned her head back and kissed me. "I love you too, David."
——————
"I had that dream again, doc." I told my therapist.
"And how do you feel about that?"
"I mean it's not a scary dream so I'm fine with it, but it is frustrating to see it every night."
"Why is that?"
"I-" I stopped myself before continuing. Should I be honest with my reasoning?
"Be honest, Dave." She looked at me.
"It makes me want to fast forward."
"Do you think that, that dream is going to be your reality?"
"I'd hope so. I just don't know how I'm going to get to that point." I shook my head.
" I see." She wrote a few things down. "When's the last time you saw Faith?"
"About.." I trailed off, thinking. "Two weeks ago? Yeah two weeks ago."
"How did that make you feel?" That was such a dumb question, but imma answer it anyway.
"Made me feel happy. I miss her. That's why I'm here. To better myself for her. I really want this and to do that, I gotta get my shit together." I said remembering everything she and my moms said to me.
"Well this is good. You've been coming here faithfully since November and I can see a difference. Why do you think you revert back to your old ways when you stop coming to see me?" She asked the important question with this one.
"I honestly don't know. I was thinking maybe you could tell me."
She shook her head. "You know, Dave. I don't know you that well to have a say on why you do what you do."
We sat in silence for a minute until I spoke. "Umm maybe it's the commitment? I don't know. Okay so I know I want to be with Faith. Without a doubt, but I think she's too good for me. I don't want to fuck up this amazing woman because I don't know how to express myself and tell her how I'm feeling. I can see she's falling for me and I'm doing the same with her, but I think I hold back."
"Sounds like you know exactly what your problem is, David." She smiled at me and I nodded because I guess I did. "Are you ready to tell me about this reoccurring dream of yours?"
I shook my head. "Nah."
"Okay. That's fair. Last thing and we'll wrap up for this week. Do you think a session with Faith would be beneficial for the two of you?"
I thought about it for a minute. "What would be the reason?"
"Some people find it helps to have a therapist to kind of guide the discussion so we can get to the root of some of the issues that the two of you are dealing with. Or you two could just talk and I could just listen and help when asked. It's just a suggestion that you could think about."
"I can ask." I stood up from my seat. "Aight doc I'll see you next week."
"Dave." She called out before I walked out. "Make sure you also ask her if she wants this. This process doesn't work if it's one sided." I nodded and walked out. Damn does she even want me back?
—————
"Daddy we hungry." Kairi said as soon as I stepped through the door.
"Where's maw maw?" I asked walking further into the house. She shrugged. "What y'all want to eat?"
"Wendy's!" They yelled.
"I'm already here. Who going back out to get some Wendy's? Not me. And it's snowing? Tuh!" I laughed and made my way to the living room, plopping down on the couch.
Ella and Kairi started to whine and beg. "Pleasseeee." They screamed out.
"Aye. Y'all chill out." They stopped. "I'll see what I can do. Y'all go to your room and play." I dismissed them. I checked the time and see that Faith gets off in ten minutes so I called her office phone.
"This is Faith." She picked up.
"This is Faith." I mocked her.
She smacked her lips. "Whatchu want? I'm about to see you in a little bit."
"I know that. I just missed you is all." I deepened my voice......and she hung up.
"What David?" She answered when I called back.
"I was just playing." I laughed. "Can you swing by Wendy's before you get here?"
"Why can't you go yourself?"
"I was already home when I got the request."
"Do you want anything from there? Or I can stop somewhere else." She asked already knowing that Kairi and Ella were the ones that asked.
"Uhhh whatchu thinking about gettin?"
"I want some wings. I'm craving."
"Aight. Well you can just get me some lemon pepper."
"Okay. I'll be at the house in like an hour. We'll see how this traffic is."
"Be safe, baby."
She paused before speaking. "I will." I could tell in her voice she was trying to keep from smiling.
"I love you." I said quickly.
"I love you t- David." She kind of yelled when she realized what she said.
"Byyyee." I hung up. She know she love my ass.
About an hour and fifteen minutes later she was pulling up in the driveway. I got up to go and help her. "I got it. Get in the house." I told her when I saw her trying to grab everything.
I followed behind her once I got our food and the other stuff she bought. "Whew. It's a mess out there. This is one thing I miss about North Carolina. When it snows, niggas get to stay home. Y'all trippin out here." She said whole taking her shoes and coat off.
"I see you know how to drive in that shit though." I laughed, taking the stuff in the kitchen.
"Of course. I ain't have no choice if I want to keep my job." She started to take everything out of their bags. "Go get the girls while I heat their food up."
"Yes ma'am." I walked out the kitchen and went to go get the girls for dinner. I walked downstairs with them both in my arms.
"TT!" Ella yelled and reached for Faith.
"Hey Ella Bella." She kissed her cheek. "What I tell you about your noise level? Don't yell in the house, right?" Ella nodded. "Hey Kai Kai." Faith walked over to me and I leaned Kairi down so she could kiss her. "Alright you two. Your food and juice is on the table. Go eat before it gets too cold. And don't make a mess." We put them down and they ran towards the dinning room. "No running!" They slowed down.
"You're such a good mom." I told her while I admired her.
"I'm not. I'm a good guardian." She brushed off while she moved around the kitchen. "I got us some fries from the store, but I'm really wanting them to be fried. Can you do it?" She lightly pouted her lips.
"Yeah mama I can do it." I moved towards the stove. "What's all this other stuff you got?"
"Oh I called your mom right after we hung up and asked her if she needed me to pick up anything while I was out."
"Hey Faith." My mom said coming into the kitchen.
"Hey ma." They hugged each other.
"Thank you for the groceries. Dave pay the girl."
"It was no problem. You don't have to pay me. Y'all watch Ella for free so I owe y'all."
"You don't owe us nothing." I said butting in.
"Thanks." she said. "Ma I got you and pops some wings. I wasn't sure if y'all had eaten or if y'all were hungry."
"Thanks baby, but he wanted some leftovers so I'm about to warm us up some." Momma quickly heated up their food and went back upstairs to their room.
"Faith." Kairi came in the kitchen.
"Yes ma'am?" Faith looked down at Kairi.
"Can El El stay here?" Her and Ella gave each other pet names. Kairi calls her El El and Ella calls her Kai Kai. They've gotten extremely close over the course of two weeks and they've been trying to have a sleepover for the longest. I don't mind, but Faith isn't really fucking with the idea right now and I don't know why.
"Not to-" I interrupted her before she could finish.
"Yeah Kai. They both staying tonight. We gone have a huge slumber party." Faith looked at me like I was crazy.
"Yayyy! I'm going to go tell her." Kairi ran out of the kitchen.
"Now why did you lie to her?" Faith looked at me.
"I didn't." I said while I went over to the stove to put the fries in the grease. I moved to the side as I placed them in there. Shit was poppin like crazy.
"Yes you did. Dave we are leaving as soon as I'm done eating." She laughed.
"No you not. There's a whole snow storm out there so get comfortable, baby."
"No there isn't." she disappeared into the living room to go and check, I guess. "Bruh really?" she came back into the kitchen. "I can't stay here."
"Why? You act like you ain't never stayed over here before."
"Dave-" She stopped herself from talking. "Alright."
I smiled. "It's not like you had a choice anyways. Allah knew what he was doing. Food's ready."
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When Faith and I finished eating, we got settled in my room with the kids. We started watching a movie with them, but they fell asleep at the foot of the bed about thirty minutes ago. Right now, surprisingly, I'm laying on top of Faith, between her legs and my head in the crook of her neck, while she runs her fingers and hand over my head. I'm bout to fall asleep if she keep on.
"Baby." I called out to her.
"Hm." she mumbled while messed around on her phone.
"Do you think we'll get back together?" I mumbled.
She sighed. "Get up, Dave." She sat up and moved me off of her and got up to head to my bathroom.
"Why you don't want to answer the question?" I asked as I followed behind her.
"Because Dave your question doesn't need a response. I'm not getting into it with you."
"But why not?"
"We're not ready to get back together, David. Gosh what is so hard for you to understand?" She turned towards me and said.
"I never said we were. I was just asking a question. Damn."
"My answer to you is, I don't know. Okay?" She took a deep breath to calm herself down. "You and I, relationships in general, are far from my mind right now. Ella takes up most of my time, work, school, trying to move-"
"Move? Where you going?"
"I'm thinking about moving out here. I'm ready to find my forever home. I thought I would be doing that with you, but we see that didn't happen." She joked. She's hurt. "Dave I'm not saying no, but we know we have to focus on ourselves. I am proud of you for going to therapy to better yourself though. I like this you." She looked into my eyes then chuckled and looked down.
"What?" I asked.
"This is why I didn't want to stay over here." She shook her head.
"Why?"
"Because I still have feelings for you and being here with you isn't helping my case. Laying up out there, I liked it and I missed it. We were just chillin. It felt like how it did when we first got involved before we made it official. When we were just friends." She paused. "Maybe we're better off as friends?" she looked at me for confirmation. I shrugged because maybe she is right. We were amazing friends. "I'm kind of tired. I had a long week and I just want to go to sleep. Let's put them to bed real quick." She walked past by me to walk back into my room. She went to grab Ella, but I moved her hands and picked them both up.
We went to Kairi's room and got them both situated. We kissed them and made our way out of the room. I turned the night light on before we walked all the way out. "Look Faith. I'm not going to rush you. I just want you to know that you still got my attention and I'll wait as long as I have to, to get you back. As long as I have to until you're ready to give us another try."
She smiled and placed her hand on my face. "Don't. I don't want to string you along and give you false hope because I don't know if I'll ever want to give us a try, again. I have other things to worry about and you and I aren't really on the frontline." She stepped away from me. "Goodnight, Dave." And with that, she walked down the hall to the guest room and I watched her until she got through the door and closed it behind her.
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Faith's POV
The doorbell ringing, woke me up. I picked up my phone to see that it's nine in the morning on a Saturday. I groan and get up. I throw on Dave's shirt and make my way out of the guest room and to his bedroom. When I get there I open his door to see him putting on some sweats. "Who is at the door this early?"
"Millie." he said and I rolled her eyes, but then I smiled. "What you thinking?" He looked over at me skeptical. I'm feeling petty this morning.
"Come on. Someone is at the front door." I walked towards the stairs with him following closely behind me. We got to the door and I opened it. "Good morning." I smiled at Millie.
Millie mugged me. "The fuck is she doing here? I thought you got rid of this bi-"
"Aye." Dave stopped her before she could get the word out and stepped in front of me. Kind of like a barrier between us. "The fuck did I tell you? We had a whole conversation about you and yo mouth. Stop fucking playin with me Millie."
I looked up at Dave shocked as fuck. Woah. He never told me he had a conversation with her about her disrespecting me. I'm glad it finally happened after being disrespected after fifty million times, but I will not bring up the past if I'm trying to move forward. I'm glad he did it and I can see that he's making the effort to better himself and trying to right his wrongs. I'm taking notice of his actions and they're appreciated.
"Okay. Sorry." she mumbled.
"Whatchu doing here anyway?" He mugged her.
"I came to get Kairi."
"You ain't get my text last night?" He looked at her confused.
"I did, but-"
"But what?" Him putting his foot down is a turn on and I haven't had any "attention" since our last session in my office, but we're not going to get that fulfilled today. I already set a boundary. Can't go back on it now. Can I? "It's nine in the damn morning. You saw my text and it's still the same. Bye Millie." He closed the door in her face. His hard face relaxed when he turned around and looked at me.
"You never told me you had a sit down with her about that."
"Oh yeah." He scratched the back of my head. "It was actually a week after we broke up." I looked taken aback, but nodded. "Should've been done it and, again, I'm sorry about that Faith."
"I gotchu." I nodded again. "You want to help me make breakfast?" I asked starting to walk in the direction of the kitchen.
Dave grabbed my hand and intertwined our fingers, and butterflies invaded my stomach. Wow. He still has that effect me. I don't know why I'm shocked though. Of course I still miss and love him although I'm trying to stop myself. He pulled me close to him. "I'd rather lay up with you in my bed." He spoke with his morning voice and looked down at me. His eyes piercing into my soul. Fuck this is so hard.
"You gone either cook with me or lay up by yourself." I smiled up at him. I have to stand my ground.
"Aight I'll help you cook." He chuckled, deeply.
We got into the kitchen and decided we were going to make sausage, eggs, grits, and pancakes. I'm doing the pancakes and eggs while he does the sausage and grits. We were working on the last and easiest things. The eggs and grits.
"Don't put sugar in them grits." I looked over at him in disgust.
"I'm not." He frowned. I pointed to the cylinder shaped container in his hand. "Oh." he mumbled.
"I'm done. I beat you." I smiled when I turned the stove off after finishing the eggs.
"I ain't know this was a race, but I'm done too." He ate some of the grits off of the spoon he used to make the grits. "Hm." he placed the spoon in front of my mouth and I leaned forward to eat the remains off of the spoon.
"Okay. I guess you know what you doing." I turned around and used a fork to get some eggs. "Taste this." I raised my arm to get the fork leveled with his mouth. He leaned forward, looked into my eyes, and wrapped his lips around the fork. He slowly pulled back, while keeping eye contact and he had me in a daze. I was biting my lip and everything. How does this man still have me sprung? "Good?" I mumbled still holding eye contact.
He moved closer to me, trapping me between him and the counter, and moved his face closer to me. "Yeah." He mumbled.
"Are we interrupting something?" Momma asked, making my head whip in her direction. She held Kairi and Ella's hand.
"Nah." Dave kept his eyes on me and backed away from me. "Breakfast is ready." He said about to walk out of the kitchen after kissing the three of them on the cheek.
"You want me to make you a plate?" I asked him, walking behind him. Why? He can make his own damn plate.
"It's okay, baby. I'm bout to jump in the shower real quick. You go head and eat."
"I can wait for you." I responded fast and grabbed his hand. Momma looked at me with a smirk and her eyes squinted then started to make her and the girls plates.
"I'll be right back." He chuckled and pulled me to him. "Go ahead and eat." He said so I could only hear him and then he leaned down and kissed the corner of my mouth.
"Okay." I said, softly and let go of his hand. He smiled and made his way upstairs. Ugh. What am I doing? I gotta get out of here and fast or I might regret doing something I know I shouldn't do.
I walked back into the kitchen feeling sad and upset. Not with Dave, but with myself. What am I doing? I'm supposed to be focusing on myself and I'm not completely healed or over our break up.
"You okay, Angel?" Momma asked me, looking concerned.
I straightened up quickly to hide my discomfort. "Yeah. Yes ma'am. I'm going to go and take a shower. After cooking the food, I'm not really hungry." I laughed.
"Okay. I'll watch the babies." I nodded and went to the guest room that I stayed in last night.
I blew out a breath and decided to lay down since a headache was coming on from all of my thoughts. I got under the covers and that's when the water works came. Why am I crying?! I'm so tired of crying, but emotions are doing what they want.
I feel like I'm crying and feeling this shit more than he is and that's pissing me off. Then I don't have him anymore so that makes me sad. I miss being held and loved on so that doesn't help the equation either. Basically, I'm fucked up over this breakup and I'm doubting that I'll ever be able to love again, in that sense.
At times, I feel like I'm going crazy because this boy is always on my mind. I can distract myself all I want with taking care of Ella, school, and work, but some way and somehow my mind reverts back to David Brewster. Maybe I'm the one that needs therapy because this shit can't be healthy.
I pulled the covers more over my head and sink into the pillows. Now I'm going to do what I do best in my times of trouble, sleep. I was on my way there until I felt the bed dip, lightly.
"TT?" I heard Ella say softly.
"Yes baby." I sniffles to try and hide my cries then came up from under the covers. I'm sure my nose is red and you can see that I've been crying.
"You okay?" She rubbed her hand across my hair in a comforting way and looked at me with pity.
"Yes babe. I'm okay." I cracked a smile to convince her, but she wasn't feeling my response.
"I'm going to get alto." She jumped down from the bed and jetted out of the room before I could stop her. She knows Dave's name, but from time to time she'll call him "alto" because he's tall.
I jumped up from the bed and went to wipe my face to try and hide the fact that I was showing emotions just a few moments ago because I really don't want to have this conversation.
———————
Dave's POV
A soft knock coming from my door made me hurry up and get dressed because I knew it was one of the girls. I threw my sweats and t shirt on with my socks and slide and went to open it. When I did, it was Ella.
"Hey baby girl. What's up?" I smiled and picked her up.
"TT is crying." She stated sadly. "She didn't tell me what's wrong."
"Aight. Thank you baby. Go find Kai Kai so y'all can chill with each other." I put her down and she went to go find Kairi.
I made my way to the guest room and walked in. She wasn't in the bed so I knew she was in the bathroom. I knocked on the door. "Faith." I called out.
"I'm okay, Dave."
"Open the door." I jiggled the doorknob.
"I'll be out in a minute."
I went to sit on the bed and wait for her to come out. "Sit down." She sat beside me, but kept her distance. "What's up? Talk to me."
"I think I'm going to put Ella in daycare." I scrunched my face.
"Why? She's perfectly fine here."
"Yeah, but if I'm being honest, seeing you almost every time I pick her up doesn't help me get over you and that's what I want to do. It hasn't been that long since we broke up and I'm still dealing. I'm still hurting and I'm still crying." She took a deep breath. "This shit doesn't feel good. Like I'm so over my over emotional ass and I'm ready to get back to my normal. My normal by myself. Having to care for someone else doesn't help me either because I don't have time to process everything. I don't."
"I understand."
"But do you really?" She looked over at me and scoffed.
"Of course I understand. Just because I'm not crying every five minutes or displaying any emotions doesn't mean I'm not fucked up." I got down on my knees in front of her and she sighed, rolling her eyes.
"Get up."
"No I need you to really understand what I'm saying to you. Faith I am sorry for everything. I fucked up yo and I'm paying for the shit every time I see you. I wish you were staying here when you get off work. I wish I was cooking you dinner in our house. I wish I was making love to you and blowing your back out on command, but I messed up and I'm trying to right my wrongs." She covered her face and started laughing, but that soon turned into her crying.
"I'm such a wimp. My time of the month is coming next week. I think I'm pmsing." She chuckled while she wiped her eyes. "I hear you, but I'm not ready." She stood up from her seat on the bed around me since I was still on the floor. "Thanks for letting us stay here and thank you for watching my niece, but starting Tuesday, she'll be attending daycare."
I stood up. "But how you gone pay for that, school, rent, your car note, gas, food, and everything else? Just let her stay here, Faith. They've grown to love each other. Don't punish the kids because of our issues, bro."
"She'll be fine and so will I. I know how to budget and if I cut out a few things, I can afford this. We're good. Thanks for the help though. I really do appreciate it."
"You starting to become really selfish and self absorbed."
"Excuse me?" She scrunched her face up.
"You heard what I said. This shit is selfish bruh. You bout to take her away from the only friend she has out here because you want to act like a little kid. Grow up. You know damn well you can't afford child care out here with your starting salary. Yeah you got a little money, but not enough to put her in a nice daycare. So you bout to the risk the chance of her getting hurt in the establishment when we both can guarantee she'll be safe and cared for here. You mad selfish, but you gone do what you want because you always do this shit. Something you don't like happens, you run. It's time to grow up. I've stepped up to everything I've done wrong."
"I haven't done anything wrong!" She defended herself before I could continue.
"Until now. You taking that little girl away from us is wrong on so many levels, but take us out of the equation. Think about how Ella is going to feel when she can't be around her best friend because her aunt wants to be selfish."
"I'm not being selfish. This is what's best for her."
"Is it what's best for her or you?" I challenged.
"Her. I-"
"How?"
"She-" Faith stuttered. "It would give her the opportunity to meet more kids her age."
"Bullshit. But whatever. You gone regret this shit when it hits the fan. Don't say I didn't warn you or tried to reason with you either." I walked out the room pissed. At this point I'm done trying. I'll keep going to my therapy sessions, but I don't know if I'm feeling us getting back together.
——————
Well hello. Back to back updates!
Three things.
1. I didn't realize how crappy Dave was to Faith in the beginning of this book and she went back every time. I know I wrote it, but I honestly forgot LOL 💀
2. Ummmmm Dave looked so good on Monday for his 31st. Whew like he wouldn't have gotten past me to go out. Just. Damn.
3. Lastly, I think they're together guys. She was at the dinner and I heard that loud, obnoxious laugh she does every time he's recording 💀 my feelings low key hurt. Not that I had a chance, but he was my last, single celebrity crush. 😭
*sigh* thanks for reading 💙