When I returned to Sam's the children were both asleep. Their mornings at the beach had affected Clara's routine and her quiet time had turned into nap time. I had let myself in and immediately heard Sam on the phone in the room he used as an office. I sat in the living room to wait. Feeling restless, I went into the kitchen for water and wasted time cleaning up from their lunch. His voice became louder.
"I don't care. Call your lawyer, but make sure you start the divorce proceedings. I'm tired of waiting while you screw around."
He looked surprised to see me when he walked into the kitchen and gave me a thin smile. He surprised me by holding out his hand. I took it and he pulled me into him. He was talking to his soon to be ex-wife, and he wanted me.
"Phoebe stop. They are loving every minute of their summer. I'm not carting them back to New York, so you can see them for a few hours before you run off with Damon again."
"I am not jealous of Damon. He can have you. I'd rather the kids stay with me than some full-time nanny you hire."
"Jeez, a part-time babysitter... No, are you going to take them to the park? What happens when he wants to fly off to Paris?... I know you love them. Leave them here for the summer. They're happy. Start cooperating and then we'll be divorced. No... Goodbye... I said Goodbye."
He was clearly annoyed, but he never raised his voice. He tightened his hold on me, as if he were clinging to me. Suddenly his wife seemed real. He was in Maine hiding from her. We were both hiding.
It also reminded me he lived in New York, the place I couldn't return to because of Parker. That meant Sam, and I were just a summer thing. We only had the month of August left. It was time to decide whether I was ready.
"I'm sorry you heard that. She can make me angry."
"That wasn't angry! I know angry."
"I felt angry, but yelling would only wake them up. I'd rather they slept, so I can kiss you."
His kiss was soft and gentle. It was about comfort and not passion. He broke apart and held me. I tried to comfort him.
"What did she want?" I knew the answer.
"The kids. To see them. I understand she misses them, but the guy she's with hates kids."
"Will you fight for full custody?"
"I wish. I'd never get it."
"I can't watch them in New York. You know that, right?" What I really meant was I can't be with you when you return to New York.
"I wish I never had to go back."
I smiled. "Let's not think about it."
He kissed me and I knew I wanted him. He was angry, yet he stayed calm. I could trust him completely. Our kiss was interrupted before it became heated with a little voice calling out.
"Daddy!"
Pulling away, I went to find both children awake. They smiled when they saw me. Clara asked, "Are we going to the beach again?"
It looked dark outside. "It might rain."
She pouted, Sam came in. "We can build a fort and maybe Callie will climb in."
Clara excitedly jumped on her bed and Ian followed. I grabbed him and Sam picked up Clara and we carried them to the living room. I learned they were experienced fort builders and when it was done the two children played inside peeking out at us to say boo.
They filled the afternoon with giggles and I found the more time I spent with Sam as a father, the more I was attracted to him.
It was later than usual when the children were settled in for the night. As Sam shut their door, I approached him. "I know what I want. I'm ready."
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