The ride back to the school was quiet but I knew it would be. No one wanted to talk, including me. It was just took time for the pain to heal but this death would take longer than other. When we finally arrived at the school I knew that things would never be the same again.
I padded into the school and everything seemed a whole lot darker. No one stirred and I wasn't sure that I had ever been there that quiet. It jolted me a bit and was jolted me even more was that I would have to go to bed as if everything was normal.
I opened Thyme's room and saw her sleeping peacefully. Every since Murk had left she now shared a room with Echo. They were both snoring and I knew they were in a deep sleep. I then turned to my sons' room. I saw Avery and Reed sleeping but I knew that when they woke up they'd hear everything that was going on.
I closed the door timidly before I saw Logan in the corner of my vision. I padded toward him and looked up at him. "I'm so sorry," I breathed as I looked up at him. I really wasn't good with sympathy but I was trying my paw at this.
I brushed my head against his hand. His fingers numbly massaged my fur before he walked right past me as if I wasn't even there. I whimpered but he acted as if I hadn't even been there.
"Logan," I called but he didn't even give me the time of day. "Logan!" I repeated louder but he kept going and left me standing alone in the hallway.
I thought about going to find Thruster but I knew he wanted to be alone. I forced myself after Logan. I pushed into our room and saw him sitting on the edge of the bed. His hands were folded together and I saw the absolute grief seem to waft through him. I just wished there was something I could do.
"Logan," I called again but unfortunately he continued to ignore me. "Logan please." I actually said please so he must have known I was desperate for him to talk to me. He ignored me once more and I strode toward him.
I sat beside him and rested my head on his knee. "Logan," I breathed once more as I licked his folded hands. "Talk to me, please."
Logan swiveled his head around and looked to me. "He's gone Starlight," he seemed to growl and that made my fur stand on end.
"Yes I know he's gone," I barked as my ears twitched. "I am so sorry for that. All of us depended on him greatly."
"Why wasn't it Erik," spat Logan as I saw his claws threaten to make an appearance.
I raised a paw and touched it to Logan's hand. He finally turned his head to look at me and I perked up a bit. "You can't honestly wish death on someone else."
Logan then looked away for me and I realized that I hadn't said the right thing. "Yes I wish it was Tony but there is nothing we can do."
He closed his eyes tightly. "I can't believe it was Jean."
I felt hollowness rush through me. His voice didn't show love right now, only pure hatred like the kind I had for Tony. "I'm sure she didn't mean anything like that to happen."
"You weren't there Starlight," Logan pointed out and I knew that was certainly true. "You didn't see what I saw."
I shook my head. "No. No I didn't and I can imagine it was awful. Poultice was pretty shaken up about it. I just wish I could do something about it."
"Have you tried talking to him," he suggested but he still sounded as if he didn't care.
I rolled my eyes. "Of course I tried. However he won't talk to me. He just stood stiff on the way back and gazed at the window as if he expected the Professor to just, well, come back I suppose."
Logan gave a subtle nod before he looked forward. "Tried that. Didn't work."
I sighed and leaped onto the bed, spreading my wings in a stretch. "Didn't think that it would. I believe that the funeral is tomorrow."
Hostility rose from Logan and I wondered if I shouldn't have mentioned the funeral. When he didn't answer I knew I was right. "I suspect that I have to dress up, at least nicer."
Logan growled and glared down at me. I lifted a paw and rested it on his shoulder. "I think you should dress up a bit too. At least something besides your usual attire."
Logan just looked angrier and I wondered if I should just shut my muzzle. I didn't though because I was as stubborn as Logan and we had similar personalities. I'd like to add lighter fluid to the flame. "Are you going to say anything?"
"Like what," he snapped and I knew that soon he would probably lash out, with or without claws.
I forced him to look at me. "I suppose you've never been to a funeral, hmm?" He gave no response so I'd just assumed I was right. "At a funeral if you like you're usually allowed to give a speech or say something about the deceased. It's like honoring them."
"Speeches aren't my strong suit," pointed out Logan and it wasn't like I could disagree with him. They weren't mine either but I hoped maybe I could say something.
It was apparent that we weren't getting anywhere so I just padded to the end of the bed and curled up. I lifted a wing and nibbled at it and I saw Logan grumble. He hated when I did that but I had to clean myself somehow.
"Might want to get some rest," I suggested once I had given myself as thorough of a grooming as I could muster. "Big day tomorrow."
Logan still seemed out of it but this time he actually took my suggestion. He laid down and threw the covers over him. I liked my place at the bottom of the bed but I also enjoyed being up at the pillow. I climbed upward and curled at the pillow beside Logan.
To my surprise Logan stretched out a hand and scratched me behind my ear. I wagged my tail and fell into a deep sleep.