ships; ot10
"i don't know... i'm just having second thoughts"i say keeping my eyes fixated on the coffee table with my water. "of what?"hyuna says, "at this point...literally everything, should i even still go on? i've been missing home way to much lately...i've been failing to reach expectations..."i say.
"jisoo, missing home is apart of this life, and failing is the only way to succeed. you want to give up? now? not even a year into your career, where you guys are becoming more famous. jisoo, you want to leave that? you want to leave the fans? the company? the boys? chan? jisung? my own brother..."hyuna says.
"it's just...it's getting too hard...haven't you seen, their petitions for me to leave, what's the point in staying?"i ask. "jisoo..."eunha says, "i'm just tired of all of it. i should've gone solo when i had the opportunity, i would've saved our careers..."i say, "chan wouldn't want you to say that"mina says.
"and chaeyoung would be highly disappointed that you hurt her brother"camila says sitting with us, "what's the point? i already feel like a disappointment"i say laying my head back. "so what...your just gonna stay here and not sort it out?"jihae says.
i look at her, i always looked up to jihae. she always reminded me of chan, an amazing leader who deserved to be heard so much more, who overworks just to be perfect when everything they do is perfect.
"no..."i say softly, "i wanna cool down, i don't wanna go back and get into another fight, it won't fix anything...i know..."i say and jihae nods patting my head, "don't you think you should talk to one of them?"jihae asked, hyuna held her phone with hyunjin's contact already there.
i nod, hyuna hits the call button. she places the phone up against her ear, waiting for the other line to answer.
i paced back and forth around the room. where is she? we haven't seen her in hours, we had to stop practice and try and find her. the ceo was mad we got into a fight, minho apologized for his outburst of a temper, but jisoo isn't responding to any of our calls.
we've called hana and minsun, both of them said jisoo wasn't with them. i was about to call my sister, when her contact name appeared on my screen. i answer it, "hey, i was just about to call you"i say, "haha telekinesis siblings"hyuna says and i laugh a little. "have you seen jisoo? i'm kind of worried"i say immediately, "kind of? that's an understatement, but yeah she's here"hyuna says.
it goes quiet for a couple of seconds, "h-hello?"jisoo's voice says. i rush to the living room and the boys notice me, "are you okay?"i ask very worried. "y-yeah...uhm...but i don't know if i'm ready to go back home"jisoo says and i nod, "do you want me to go there to talk?"i ask.
"no thanks...i just wanna cool off, i'll be fine. the girls will watch over me, i know the dance already... just practice without me"jisoo says, i stand there. "jisoo...don't do anything stupid"i say biting the end of my thumb. "i'll try not to"she says, her voice barley above a whisper.
she hung up, i held my phone. my lock screen showed her smiling, this was before we debut. she looked so beautiful, so carefree, so...happy. i trusted jisoo but... i was scared, i don't want to loose her, she's just scared and i could tell.
"did jisoo respond?"chan asked, i nod. "she won't be coming to practice...she said to go on without her...she's okay, at least that's what she says"i say and minho sighs, "did i mess it up badly?"minho says and woojin shakes his head. "not at all, maybe she's just overwhelmed, she'll be okay. she's strong, we know her so well"woojin says.
i say there, i held my phone. the ten of us being idiots, i sighed closing my phone. i didn't know what i want or what i was going to do at all, i laid on the couch and slowly began to fall asleep. hopefully a little bit of sleep can solve my problems.