If there was one thing Jesse did not feel like doing that morning, it was hiking. She was tired and in somewhat of a grumpy mood, but what else could be expected after the hours of work she had to force in the previous day?
But a promise was a promise, and Jesse promised Petra the previous week that she would push her work aside for a weekend, and the two of them could have some fun. Jesse wasn't about to disappoint Petra and tell her she didn't want to go hiking.
"You got everything packed already?" Petra asked, practically bouncing up and down on her chair.
"Yeah." Jesse stifled a yawn. Not even a cup of coffee felt like it was doing the job of waking her up that morning.
"Hey, it's going to be a ton of fun!" Petra said, taking a bit of her pancakes and proceeding to talk with a mouthful of food. "It's finally a day we can just forget about everything and enjoy each other's company!"
"Mmm." Jesse hummed in response, taking another gulp from her second cup of coffee. "Where we heading?"
"Not far, since you insisted we get back before Monday." Petra said, rolling her eyes slightly. "But I thought a good place to hike out to was mountains west of the dark oak forest."
"Sounds... great." Jesse said, trying to not let the disappointment show in her voice. She had nothing against the location Petra's picked, it sounded amazing. But the mere thought of the rocky terrain they'd have to hike across, just made her heart sink all the way into her boots.
Petra continued to excitedly babble on about the trip, and the stuff she wanted to do. Jesse listened with one ear, her thoughts straying as she poked at the food in her plate with not much appetite.
It felt odd to be so... unexcited over something she usually loved doing. Over the past few months her spirit had just been really drained.
Maybe it was because of how empty the Order Hall had become, or maybe it was because of all the hours she's spent on work. Jesse didn't know any more at that point.
Jesse glanced slightly up at Petra, her friend immediately grinning broadly at her. In a way, it felt she was living in constant fear. Petra was the only friend she had left, and it felt like she could disappear at any moment.
In all honesty, Jesse wouldn't blame Petra. Ever since she took on the job as Beacontown's Hero in Residence, she's been working more and more, while spending less and less time with Petra. That's why Jesse had pushed herself so hard to get enough work done, so she could afford taking a few days off for her friend's sake.
"Jesse? Did you hear me?"
Jesse jolted out of her trance, her gaze snapping up to Petra. Her friend had her head titled to the one side, an eyebrow raised.
"I have a feeling you haven't been listening to a word I'm saying." She said, shaking her head.
"Sorry, just zoned out for a bit." Jesse said, sitting back in her chair. "You were saying?"
"I was saying, I think we picked a great day to do this." Petra said, gesturing out of the window. "Not too hot, not cold, clouds to hide the sun, yet no rain... perfection!"
"When are we heading out?" Jesse asked, forcing down another approaching yawn.
"I was thinking right after breakfast, if you plan on finishing any time soon." Petra said, gesturing to Jesse's plate, the pancakes still most untouched.
"I'm not very hungry this morning." Jesse said with a shrug. "You have all your stuff packed and ready as well?"
Petra snorted, waving a hand at Jesse. "I've had them packed for two days now, you ain't gotta worry!"
Jesse rolled her eyes, managing a small chuckle. Then, trying to push down all the thoughts that made her feel so glum, she forced a large, happy smile onto her face. "Let's go then!"
Petra didn't need telling twice to bolt up the stairs to go grab her bags. Letting her large, fake smile fall, Jesse trudged back up to her own bedroom to get her own bags as well. She could only hope the the caffeine kicked in soon and began to do its thing, otherwise Petra was bound to notice that something was up.
It didn't really, and Jesse was still dragging her feet by the time she and Petra walked out of town. Petra seemed to be full of life, telling Jesse the one enthusiastic story after the other. Jesse guessed her friend probably a ton of things bottled up that she's been wanting to tell for ages. In all honesty, seeing just how excited one hike was making Petra, made Jesse feel bad.
"Why are you so quiet?" Petra asked after a while. "You're barely talking, and I constantly have to check whether you're listening or not."
"Sorry." Jesse said, giving her an apologetic smile. "My mind's just in a bit of a different place, I guess..."
"Third time in a row you're using that excuse." Petra said, frowning. She stopped, turning to face Jesse. "Come on, you know you can talk to me. What the flip is up?"
"Nothing." Jesse said with a sigh, wishing they could just continue walking. "I'll try and stay more focused on the here and now, come on, let's go."
Petra didn't seem convinced, but she gave in and the two of them continued walking. Her chatter did die down a tiny bit, and Jesse picked up on the fact that Petra was constantly glancing over at her.
"Are you sure everything's fine?" Petra asked her again after a while.
"Yup." Jesse replied, doing her best at making it sound sincere.
"Well, if you figure out what's bugging you this morning, tell me." Petra said, looking over at her. She smiled. "I want you to enjoy this trip as much as me."
Yeah, good luck with that.
Jesse forced a smile onto her face, nodding at Petra. Seemingly convinced, Petra soon returned to excited chattering as they continued to hike on.
Jesse was starting to consider the possibility that she was getting out of shape. Every step felt like the non-existent weights tethered to her ankles got heavier. And despite the gloriously cool weather, she could feel herself sweating quite violently from the exercise.
"We're almost there!" Petra said excitedly. "Just this last stretch uphill and we can eat. Are you as hungry as I am?"
"Uh, yeah." Jesse said, trying to hold back from groaning. Uphill??
How Petra was able to so effortlessly walk up the slope like it was a flat surface, Jesse wish she knew. Her legs quivered beneath her like jelly with every climb, and she was starting to become short of breath. Was she that unfit?
"Just wait until you see the view up there-" Petra was continuing on excitedly. "-You know I'm not one for sight seeing, but even I have to admit it's pretty stinkin' beautiful."
Jesse just nodded, her focus solely on keeping up with Petra at that point. She could only hope Petra didn't get the idea to glance around and see how far she had fallen behind- and then Petra did just that.
"Hey, slow poke! Pick it up!" Petra said, waving to her.
But then her smile fell, a frown forming on her face. Jesse wasn't just lagging behind, she was physically struggling to walk the last few metres. Heaving and gasping like somebody who just ran up ten flights of stairs.
"Look, I can see your starting to pick up the habit of keeping things to yourself, from me-" Petra said, starting to walk back over to Jesse. "But mind telling me what the actual hell is going on with you today?"
Jesse didn't reply to Petra, just leaning against one of the boulders. She closed her eyes, weakly trying to catch her breath again. Petra's frown deepened, only then realising how much paler Jesse was then ten minutes ago.
"Jesse, I ask again. What the hell is wrong with you?"
Petra wasn't sure what she expected Jesse to say, or if she expected an answer at all. What she a hundred percent didn't expect, was for Jesse to begin sinking down against the boulder she was leaning on, her legs no longer carrying her weight.
"Woah!" Petra gasped, grabbing Jesse by her shoulders, just before her face and the rocky ground could meet. Only to very quickly realise, that she was holding up all of Jesse's weight.
"Jesse?" Petra's voice rose a good few pitches as she leaned her friend back against the rock, giving Jesse's shoulders a light shake.
In all honesty, Petra didn't know what to think. Surely the walk on its own couldn't have overexerted Jesse to the point of passing out? But what ever else could be a logical explanation?
Petra anxiously glanced back up to the top of the hill, wondering if she'd be able to haul Jesse up there. It wasn't far, much closer than going all the way back down.
Taking a deep breath, Petra lifted up Jesse's limp form. She was quite surprised by how light her friend was – even with Jesse's short height and petite build, Petra had expected her to weigh a lot more than she did. She was able to carry Jesse up the last stretch with near-complete ease.
Petra's thoughts were properly racing by the time she was able to set Jesse at the top of the hill. Searching and failing for a possible explanation as to what was wrong with her friend. Sure Jesse hadn't been herself that day, but she was just kind of distracted. She didn't look like she was feeling unwell in any way.
Biting her lip, Petra looked over at the beautiful view they had from the hill. But she was too stressed to even begin enjoying it. Petra reached up and tugged her bandanna off her head, raking her fingers through her short red hair.
Why did the one day they were meant to enjoy together, have to go like that?
Petra looked down at the bandanna in her hands, sighing softly. She hated how her thoughts were focused on how unfair their situation was, instead of Jesse's well-being. They just got so little time to spend together, she found herself fighting extremely hard to make as much of those times as she possibly could.
Because for as much as Petra hated to admit it, it felt like she was living in constant fear of her and Jesse's friendship falling apart. Everybody else went off to do their own thing, there was nothing stopping Jesse from pulling away from her as well.
It was so hard to keep herself from holding on too tight.
Movement from Jesse made Petra's head jerk towards her. Jesse moved her head slightly on the spot, letting out a weak groan. And then her eyes finally opened.
"Wha-?" Jesse mumbled in a disoriented voice, her eyes falling close again as she reached a hand up to her forehead. "What... what hap..happened?"
"You gave me a flipping heart attack, that's what happened!" Petra exclaimed, lowering her voice when Jesse flinched. "You fainted. Care to explain why?" Okay, maybe that was a little quick to demand an explanation from Jesse.
"Uh..." Jesse frowned, blinking her eyes open again. "I don't know..." She blinked a few times, staring up at the blue sky in confusion. "Where are we? We were... hiking..."
"Yeah, correct." Petra said, taking Jesse by the arm and helping her up into a sitting position before offering her one of their water bottles.
Jesse gratefully accepted the bottle, thirstily drinking from it. Some colour was beginning to seep back into her face by the time she finished.
"It's really hazy." She said as she handed Petra the water back. "I don't know exactly what happened, only that I was starting to run out of steam pretty quickly."
"That's about as much as I know as well." Petra said. "But it isn't all, is it?"
Jesse frowned at Petra questioningly.
"Come on Jesse." Petra said with a groan. "For how long have I known you now? Seven, eight years? I know when something isn't right. You haven't been acting like yourself at all."
Jesse's shoulders sunk slightly, looking down at her hands in her lap. "I'm just..." Her voice quivered slightly.
"Just what?" Petra asked.
"Tired, worn through, fed up with life, call I whatever you want!" The words suddenly burst from Jesse's mouth. "I'm constantly struggling to keep up with endless amounts of work, stressed from dawn till dusk! I haven't slept in days, my appetite's gone, I've been relying solely on caffeine for ages now, and the one chance I finally manage to scrape together some off time, all my remaining energy goes into hiking." Jesse's head drooped and she buried her face in her hands.
"Wait..." Petra shook her head, struggling to take in what Jesse had just said. "When exactly was the last time you slept?"
"I don't even know."
Petra raked her fingers through her hair again, finding herself almost at a loss for words. And even though she had no way of knowing, she felt terrible for dragging Jesse out there when she already pushed to her absolute limits.
"Just... why didn't you say anything?" Petra asked her.
"Because I'm already a terrible enough friend to you as it is." Jesse said softly. "I'm at work all the time. The least I could do was go hiking with you."
Petra opened her mouth to argue with Jesse on that, only to slowly close it again. She realised, if she was in Jesse's position... she probably would have done the exact same thing.
"I'm sorry." Jesse said softly, wrapping her arms around herself. "I know, I ruined everything we had planned for today."
"No." Petra said, putting a hand on Jesse's. "I don't blame you, I just... wish things didn't go this far before I found out."
Jesse looked up when she felt Petra take her hand, their eyes meeting. Her brown irises were glinting with held back tears.
"We'll figure something out." Petra said confidently. "Together. I'm not going to stand by and watch you struggle through this alone. And we'll start with getting home, getting some food into you, and then getting you straight into a bed, whether you like it or not."
Jesse broke into a smile, the tears she's been holding back welling up in her eyes. Leaning forward, she tightly wrapped her arms around Petra in a hug.
"And next time-" Petra said as she hugged Jesse back. "-When something's wrong, don't wait until you start falling behind before you talk to me."
___
I... don't like this one xD
So! Guess who lost the fight to writer's block? Ya girl right here.
So after a few hours of needlessly brainstorming and drawing nothing but a blank, I decided to stop trying to come up with something great, and just go back to my good old favourite topics - Jesse and Petra's friendship and Jesse's regret for becoming hero in residence.
And then I created something that wasn't even good.
I mean, it worked. Even with writer's block, just dropping back into my happy place helped me push this one shot up to 2400+ words. But ugh, rereading it I can literally see how much I strained to put the words out of the paper. I feel like a butchered Jesse and Petra's personalities a bit, and the whole thing just feels off.
But then again, I guess you can't be happy with every single one shot in this challenge. There's bound to be a few you just don't like the outcome of.
I will say it now - and let's hope I don't jinx myself - I think this writers block is short lived, at least in comparison to how long I spent struggling with it back in my July challenge. I've had a really flipping busy week, and was working on something every spare second without a break. The problem isn't with writing, the problem is that I need more time to breathe during my days.
But hopefully, things will start calming down within the next few days and I should be able to find my feet again... and my will for writing.
But hey, I'm determined with pushing through this challenge, and I'll hopefully be able to do that without resorting to solely Jesse and Petra based one shots... I hope XD
Anyhow, I hope you all enjoyed this not-so-great one shot, and I'll see you tomorrow with a hopefully-much-better one, with whichever prompt I draw next!