Destiel One-shots

By LaurenABlack

412K 20.6K 11.8K

Funny Destiel one-shots!! Also Headcannons, Oneshots about Dean and Sam's brotherhood, and little rants about... More

Meet The Cast
Mood Rings, An Angel, and A Tease
The Moose Is Done
Pajamas
Avril Lavigne
Photos
Castiel and TV
Freckles
Bees, Wasps, and Other Stinging Insects
References
Nicknames
Thank You Taylor Swift
Cameras See All
Possessed By Gwen Stefani
Secret Affair
Dean Winchester.
Pie
Rejected By The Moose
Donkey Kong Is An Assbutt
Bobby Singer
Bae
Nightmares
Normal?
Sitting On The Dock
The Trickster Leads To Good Things
Pain
Tapes
Attention
Missing Something?
Stupid Dean
Top or Bottom?
Strip
Shot
A Wedding Surprise
Confessions
Your Mission
Ambushed
Friends
Princess
Viva Las Gaygas
Viva Las Gaygas Part 2
Who Randomly Did Who
Did You Just Han Solo Me?
Just Funny Pictures
Headcannon
The LAST Episode
S.O.B. No HoMo
Brotherhood
Reunion
Traveling Soldier Song Oneshot
Sleeping
Saving Dean
Destiel Rant.
Dean's Date. Cas's Date. No Relation.
Gabe and Cas and Their Humans
John Winchester
Cas and Crowley, the Teenage Girls
Morning, Cas
Stupid Pastries
1941 video
Six Months Old
G. I. Winchester
The Supernatural Club
The Supernatural Club Part 2
Winchesters Don't Say "I Love You"
The Winchesters are so gay......
Run Away
Supply Closets Can Be Fun
Wedding Plans
Charlie ex Machina
Dibs
Cuddle
Sabriel
Stressed Out
My Headcannons
Musicals
Headcanons I Found
Meet The Parents
Pen Pals
Say Anything
Crazy
Winchester Initiation
Drunk Cas is Fun Cas
It's Season 16 and Somebody's Coming Out Of The Closet
Dean, the Mama Bear
Crowley
Merry Christmas Sammy
We Know, Guys. We've Always Known.
Jimmy NO.
Breakfast Recipe For Disaster
Hey Jude
Christmas at the Bunker
Cas on the Left
Scars
Bo Burnham
Destiel Acting Out Imagine Your OTP Prompts
This is What Happens When Sabriel Robs a Candy Store
More Headcannons I Found (Plus Memes)
Family Dinner
Prank War
Angel Love Prevents Nightmares
Pestered By Families
Pestered By Families Part 2
Sharp Dressed Man
Anniversary
Cas's Secret Is Out
Torturing Balthazar
This Is What Happens When Team Free Will Is Left Alone
Misha!
Just Do It
Breakfast
Sure
I'll Drive
Road Trip
Sam is Done Being Subtle
Boondock Baby
What's More Important? Your Mission, or Your Family?
What They Said vs. What It Means
Party
Sariel's Paperwork
Happy Birthday Dean Winchester
Magic Mike
Tall Tales
Jealousy
Dear Cas
Different This Time
Never. Watch. SPN. With. Your. Parents.
A Kiss
In Honor of Lebanon
Football
Terms of Endearment
Game Night
We're So Screwed
Strippers, Sammy. We are on an actual case involving Strippers. Finally.
Band Geeks
This is Why Jack Shouldn't Go To Parties
Prom
Season 20
Lilo and Stitch Led To A Sobbing Moose
Punk and Nerd
Valentine's Day
Breaking Dr. Phil
Double Date
Jensen's Parents
Bartenders and Breakups
Vicki and Danneel
Don't Talk About It
The Ma'lak box
Healing
The Story of Gabriel
Just Answer The Question, Dean.
Lily Flowers
Mary Found Out
The New Shadow
Episodes I Really Want
Wanna Talk About It?
Sam Winchester's Lovers
That Night
Snow!
Cas Does The Chores
Unspoken
A Smile And A Laugh
Three Dads
DEEEEEEAAAANN, That Kills People!
If The Pizza Man Truly Loves His Babysitter....
Cardigan Keep Away
Soulmates Are Key
Regret
Sabriel's Love Child
Supernatural, Meet Lucifer
Hands
Don't. Touch. The. Angel.
Domestic Destiel, Doing Normal Things
Family's There For You, Through Good And Bad
Saturdays
Random AU I Can't Stop Thinking About
Prisoners
Prisoners Part 2
Fatherly Advice
I Met Someone
I Met Someone Part 2
Ellie
Castiel and Crowley
Break up
PTA Dads
It's Finally Broken
And They Were Soulmates
The Phone
He Prayed
The Pharmacy
"I love you"
"I love you" Part 2

YOU SHOT ME.

1.8K 97 28
By LaurenABlack


Set in AU

An alarm clock blared annoyingly and Cas rolled over with a sigh to smash the snooze button. It was too early for this shit.

It was six a.m. and he somehow had to find the willpower to get out of bed. It was even more difficult a task considering Cas had only gotten four hours of sleep.

And then his husband decided to roll over and snuggle closer to him. The snooze ended, and the alarm started blaring again. 

"Move," He ordering, shoving at his husband futily.

"No." He retorted. "You're warm and comfy, and it's too early for you to leave me."

"I have work!"

"Screw your work."

"Babe."

"Cas."

"Move." With a reluctant groan, he moved so that Cas could get out of bed and get ready for work.

"When you gonna be home?" His husband's sleepy voice questioned.

"Seven," Cas offered. "What about you, any plans?"

"Just business meetings."

Cas Novak was a police officer, a tough job that meant you somehow managed to survive for five days on a total of four hours of sleep. But Cas liked his job. It was interesting, especially with the crime they had in town.

There was a powerful gang running around town, selling drugs, robbing stores, occasionally even kidnapping someone. 

It was a gang run by bad people, and a few of them even had their lovely mugshots plastered on the walls of the Lawrence Police Department. 

Cas had the gang leader's mugshot hung up over his desk, and looking at it always made him smirk.

Dean Winchester. Leader of the Hunters. Mastermind of the whole gang. A dangerous psychopath, they had labeled him. 

Cas disagreed, obviously. The only time Dean ever seemed dangerous to him was when you refused to give him pie.

Sure, it was a little difficult being married to a kind of mob boss, but Dean and Cas made it work. Cas knew it was wrong, but he'd slip Dean a piece of information every now and then. Who was a rat, where the cops were going to be next, what lead they had picked up and what information they had on the Hunters.

Dean, in return, kept things as clean as he could. He made sure no innocent people got hurt. Drugs they sold weren't tainted with anything else, and they never sold to kids. Places were only robbed when needed, and they only stole from big companies- never a small business that was barely scrapping by as it was.

Dean did bad things, Cas knew. But he still had morals. He was still a decent person who tried his best. Cas had to see things from Dean's point of view because he loved him, and that meant that no matter what Dean did, Cas could never bring himself to give the police even a hint as to what the Hunters were up to.

Not that Cas knew much. Dean kept the gang separate from Cas as much as he could. It wasn't that he didn't trust Cas; it was just that he didn't want the gang mixing with his personal life. He trusted the people in the Hunters, but if somebody found out he was married to a cop? They might take things the wrong way, and Cas could get hurt. 

The last thing Dean wanted was for Cas to get hurt because of something the Hunters did.

They played for opposite sides of the law, Dean and Cas, but they still managed to make things work.

Cas was nearly done with his shift when the station got a call.

"Holy Shit!" One of the officers declared. "We got a tip off about a Hunters Meeting down at the burger joint on 5th!"

Cas paused. This was the part of the job he hated. When the police got one step ahead, and it was too risky to warn Dean.

"Novak!" Someone called. "Get down there with the rest of the backup."

By the time Cas got to the scene, they had already stormed the restaurant, and members of the Hunters were running out and firing at the cops.

"Open fire!" Someone called, and the cops shot back, trying to stop as many of the gang members as they could. Cas scanned the members worriedly, but he didn't see any sign of Dean.

"Novak, on your six!" An officer warned. Cas whipped around, only seeing the metal flash of a gun and clothes before he pulled the trigger.

There was a pained cry as the man dropped to the ground, clutching his leg, and Cas's eyes widened as he recognized the wounded man.

"Oh, I'm never gonna here the end of this," Cas face-palmed as Dean started swearing.

The cops rounded up as many of the members as they could, but Dean and a couple other guys managed to stumble away. 

Cas snagged a copy of all the newest prisoners mugshots. He'd bring them back to Dean later, to see if any of them were vitally important to the gang and had to be dealt with.

Cas bit his lip anxiously as he stared at his half written report, wondering if Dean was okay. It wasn't like the mobster could go to a hospital- his wanted sign was plastered everywhere. 

"Novak!" Cas looked up, only to see the Chief of Police grinning at him. "Some of the boys said you got a shot on Dean Winchester. Well done."

"We didn't catch him," Cas said ruefully.

"Yeah, well he can;t get too far with a bullet in his leg." The Chief commented. "We'll track him down. Nice work."

"Thanks," Cas half smiled, and then went back to his report, his worrying intensified.

Seven o'clock finally rolled around and Cas went home, opening the door to his and Dean's apartment.

There was blood coating the floor, a chair was overturned, there was a discarded gun on the ground, and there were blood soaked rags in a trail leading towards the bathroom. The fridge was open, and Cas noted that a bottle of whiskey was missing from it.

He cautiously opened the door to the bathroom, only to hear the click of a gun as Dean pointed a glock at him, a death glare on his face.

His leg was bandaged, but blood was slowly soaking through it. A pair of bloody tweezer scissors lay on the floor next to a small bullet. A now half empty bottle of whiskey was clutched loosely in Dean's other hand as he raised an eyebrow at Cas.

Cas leaned against the doorframe of the bathroom, and half smiled.

"So," He said casually. "How was your day?"

"YOU FUCKING SHOT ME! THAT'S HOW MY DAY WAS!" Dean yelled back.

"Now now," Cas insisted. "You're fine."

"Fuck you." Dean declared, lowering the gun and scowling. 

"Love you too." Cas smiled. He crouched down beside Dean, examining the bandage. "Oh, next time you get shot, can you try not to bleed all over the floor? It stains the wood."

"I hate you."

"You left the fridge open too- that'll burn out the battery."

"Fuck your fridge."

"We're going to have to change the wrapping on this," Cas admitted.

"Well, I wouldn't have to do that if you hadn't SHOT ME." Cas gave him a deadpan look.

"Drink your whiskey."He ordered, grabbing some fresh bandages and fixing the dressing. Dean took a swig of the liquor and plastered on a smile.

"How was your day, honey?" He said sweetly and sarcastically.

"Not too bad," Cas admitted. "I shot a really hot guy though."

"Yeah? You arrest him?"

"Nah, he disappeared, but the police know he can't get far, so they're on a sharp lookout. He should probably wait until things die down before he goes outside again."

"Well maybe he needs to meet with his gang friends to let them know what he's not dead, and not arrested."

"Well maybe he can send his gang friends an email instead." They glared at each other.

"You know," Dean commented, taking another swig of whiskey. "We must really love each other to put up with all this shit."

"I know." Cas agreed. "And you're lucky you're cute."

"You're lucky I didn't shoot you back."

"Yeah, well, you stabbed me."

"That was two years ago!"

"And it HURT! Now we're even!"

"Stabbing and shooting are NOT even!"

"Okay fine, then in the next shootout, you shoot me, and I'll stab you."

"See now that's fair."

"How is that fair?"

"Because it is, and I'm right!"

"No you're not!"

"I'm the guy with a bullet in his leg, therefore, I'm right."

"And I'm the guy with the handcuffs who could get you a life sentence, therefore I'm right." Dean raised an eyebrow and smirked.

"So you wanna arrest me, huh?" He asked. Cas's reply was to slap the spot where the bullet had shot me, causing Dean to yelp in pain.

"Clean up your bloody mess," Cas insisted. "I'll go make dinner."

"Fuck you." Dean declared.

"Love you too dear!"


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